Hi sweethearts! I'm posting earlier this week because I'll be travelling tomorrow, hope you all enjoy it

Chapter 7

"All close to Summer." Tamlin assessed.

"No one is too eager to try Autumn´s patience." Marguerite sipped at her tea.

She had stopped by on her way back from town to convey the news that no less than four municipalities had expressed their desire to join The Alliance, and the commemorative pamphlets were already in the making to be distributed in the partisan towns.

"Summer is being remarkably tranquil about The Alliance."

"Lord Tarquin is quite liberal, or so I've heard." Tamlin shrugged.

"Oh, there´s no need, Kate!" Marguerite tried to stop her from putting a jar of raspberry jam on the basket she would be taking home.

"Of course there´s need, Daphne likes it!" Katherine insisted, moving the scones to a side to accommodate it. It was the end of winter now, Tamlin´s crops would soon be transplanted to the ground and, for the looks of it, yield a harvest to put all others to shame. She could do without one jar of raspberry jam. "Any news of the summer fair?"

"Not yet, it´s too early." Marguerite sighed "I wish I could get you a bag of coffee."

Katherine grunted.

"Don't even mention it, Maggie."

Because of course she would have to replenish her emergency fund before allowing herself any luxuries.

"You are going to be with us for the summer fair, aren't you?" Marguerite smiled at Tamlin, discreet as an old auntie.

"I believe so." Tamlin smiled back over his tea.

Katherine had wondered how long he was planning on staying with them, but it really seemed he had nowhere else to be, and she had never voiced her thoughts for fear that he would think she wanted him to leave.

"What are you talking about? Of course he will." She encouraged, sitting down with them to take her tea, which was already warm.

Katherine had given up on trying to convince herself to want him gone. He was proving to be quite a helping hand in the farm, and, despite herself, she had really grown to like his company, whether he was lost in thought over some book, or trying to play something under Allie´s guidance, or stargazing with them.

"We can all go together then!" Marguerite smiled broadly "The girls would love it!"

"Of course!" Katherine agreed.

Marguerite´s good mood was contagious, even Tamlin was smiling quietly.

"I wish Autumn would trade with us." Marguerite took a bite of her scone "The brandy prices are absurd."

"It's ridiculous." Katherine agreed. She didn't even like brandy, which was just as well, since she couldn't afford it anyway.

"They won't recognize The Alliance." Tamlin was frowning at the butter.

"Jules also thinks so." Marguerite nodded "If we're not careful they'll use it as an excuse to run us down and get to the Wall."

"They wouldn't dare." Tamlin clenched his jaw, and Katherine kicked him lightly under the table.

Sometimes she would forget who he was for days at a time, but eventually he would say or do something and she would be reminded.

"That's a partisan warrior if I ever saw one!" Her sister approved, and Katherine steeled herself not to laugh "Why don't you join the city guard, Dan?"

Tamlin gave a half-smile.

"My fighting days are behind me. But be assured, if I catch a sniff of Autumn on this side of the border I'll be the first one there to send them back."

Probably with much dismemberment and gore, Katherine assumed.

"Dan has fought enough, he has a right to rest now."

She didn't know why she said that. Tamlin had brought the richest court in Prythian down to a ruin, invited the enemies of Prythian in, which would have given cause for any other court to invade, and then saved them all the trouble by betraying Hybern and causing Spring to be massacred himself. She shouldn't be trying to make him feel better, but there she was, like some damned traditionalist.

"I'd fight again, for this court." He smiled at her, and she wished Allie had been there to witness that and stop scolding her for being too hard on poor disgraced High Lord.

"Pray it doesn't get to it."

"We all do." Marguerite shivered.

Charle Wyatt was of age to fight now. Katherine knew she prayed harder than the rest of them combined.

"You were very kind. Earlier."

Katherine shrugged, not looking up from her sewing. Allie had gone to bed, it was only the two of them that night.

"It's true. You've done your fighting."

Katherine may not like him, but at least she didn't despise him. It was more than he had a right to ask for, given the circumstances.

"Do you think Beron is going to try anything?" He turned back to the afternoon talk.

"You know him better than I do. But I think Autumn won't try anything while Summer is on our side. It would mean trouble on two borders, three if Night would mobilize Winter to safeguard Summer."

It made sense.

"Do you think The Alliance will be ready, by the time Summer leaves?"

Katherine put down the sewing, chewing on her cheek.

"Maybe. We'd rather they don't leave yet, but if it comes to it I think we should consider sending our forces to the Autumn border, regardless of the towns joining. We can't risk being trampled."

It was a lot of wishes and maybes. The Alliance was counting on their luck that Tarquin´s forces would stay long enough for them to amass an army that could keep Beron in check.

"I've let it all go to shit." He didn't realize he was saying that aloud until he had already said it.

Katherine looked at him, her eyes soft for once.

"Wait here." She swept up and left for the kitchen.

Keeping the court safe was the most elementary duty of a High Lord, and even in that he had failed. All he had wanted was for them to live in peace, to know no fear, to thrive and feel light again, and never wonder when the next battle was coming.

He had been weak, he had been feeble, he had been wicked, cruel and stupid, and it had cost them their peace. Why did the power choose him? He was no better than Lucas. He had done exactly what they would have done, what had always been done. It had worked so far, it had worked forever, why would it fail then?

Katherine came back with a steaming mug in her hands, sitting on the closer end of the couch.

"We'll find a way. Spring always comes."

There was a gentleness and a warmth in her voice as she offered him that mug. It smelt like cinnamon, clove and something else.

He had suspected it for a while, that Katherine was like fleece-lined leather. Hardship had made her rough on the outside, but her essence remained soft and warm inside. He was half-terrified of doing anything wrong and have her casting him from that warmth, but her kind smile held as he warmed his hands on the mug.

"Is there any book in this room you haven't read yet?" She picked the half-forgotten book from his lap to look at where he had stopped. The governess had just escaped into the wilderness after her wedding to her master was interrupted and the secret about the first wife was aired out. Absolutely heart-breaking.

"I couldn't push myself through Plato." He admitted, and Katherine chuckled.

Tamlin had not only read through most of that library, but also all of the books Allie had brought to him from their town house. The milk was so hot that it almost scalded his lip, and he barely had time to register Katherine lunging over the armrest.

"Careful, it's hot!" Her warm hands covered his, as if to stop him from scalding himself.

It was so… motherly. He tried to suppress a smile, lest she be offended.

"I'm fine." Tamlin couldn't hide the laughter in his voice. He was over four centuries older than her.

"I'm sorry, the habit never leaves me." She pulled her hands, leaning back on the couch with a chuckle "You'll know someday."

He wouldn't.

"How many times have you saved her?" He blew at the thread of steam rising from the cup.

"More than I can count." Katherine waved her hand with a smile "She was always tripping over her own feet, more so next to knives and hot pans, or bringing some strange new pet home."

Tamlin nearly choked on his laughter. Of all the strange pets Allie had brought home, he had to be the strangest. Katherine had paled, not in fear but mortification.

"I'm sorry, Tamlin, I didn't mean…" She put the heels of her hands to her eyes "Oh, I'm atrocious. I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that."

"It's all right." He steadied his breathing "You have no idea of the absurdities I've said in this life."

"You?" She frowned incredulously.

"Why do you think I keep silent?"

He hadn't admitted that to many people, that his quiet unfriendly demeanour was a shield against digging himself a grave just by opening his mouth.

Katherine shook her head, rolling her eyes.

"Don't worry about that, everyone in this house is, unfortunately, much used to it."

He chuckled at that, risking another sip at the hot spiced milk. It was safe now.

Safe.

The darkness outside the kitchen window had Katherine staring at her own reflection as she sipped a cup of tea, the talk from the night before still echoing in her mind. That was the first time she had ever heard something resembling regret from him, and it dawned on her just how much it must weight on him, all that he had done.

She wouldn't feel sorry for him bearing the guilt for his own decisions, but even so… She had talked to him like a friend, had cared for him like a friend, even made him spiced milk to have him feeling better when he was starting to grow gloomy.

Could they be friends? Not the High Lord, just Tamlin.

"You're up so early?" He was standing on the doorway as if summoned by her thoughts, looking surprised to see her.

"It's time I started ploughing the fields."

"In the dark?"

She shrugged. The Mother knew it was a battle for her to be awake without her coffee at that hour, but they had to eat, didn't they?

"It's a lot of work, I'd better get started."

"Why don't you-" He bit his lip, and Katherine very much wished he wouldn't suggest they hire help. They may have had an emotional moment the night before, but it was too early in the morning for her to be patient.

He may have read it on her face, because the next thing he said was:

"Can I help?"

She was beyond refusing any help.

"Do you want to?"

"Yes!" He nodded enthusiastically "Katherine, anything I can do to help, you have only to ask."

Katherine sighed, sipping from her mug. He was getting harder and harder to hate.

"You've been very helpful. It's good to have you here. I mean, not only because of that. It's just… It's good that you're here." It was still too early for her to keep a rational thread of thought, so she hoped he could understand that.

Tamlin smiled and even if he still looked sleepy, his eyes were lighter.

"I'm glad to be here."

They met again in the fields, as soon as he had milked the cow and taken a quick breakfast, and Katherine was already at work, coordinating the ploughs that clawed at the earth. She stopped them as soon as she saw Tamlin by her side.

"Is Allie up already?"

"Yes. She said she's going to bring us lunch."

"Good. Here." She reached into her pocket and placed a small can in his hands "It's for your skin."

The Mother knew how he needed it, he was as fair as Allie.

But Tamlin scowled at it.

"Is this really necessary?"

Katherine couldn't suppress a smile. That boyish protest… Her own son would probably have refused to wear a sun filter too. Why were males like that?

"If you don't want to end up looking like an old leather boot. Come here, take off your hat."

Tamlin stood obediently still as she applied the cream to his face as if he were just a boy.

It wasn't hard for him to grasp the essence of coordinating the ploughs with her, he was more strained at having to orient them than the power and strength necessary to do it, as soon as he got used it would take him no time at all to plough a whole field.

Soon it would be spring again, and if it all went well they would be able to sow much more than she had anticipated. Even if Tamlin left before harvest, she could take a small credit to afford some help, and then finally have a respite, a well-deserved good year to start building back.

Spring was coming.

"I know you don't want to go to Calanmai at the Wyatts" Katherine stopped for a moment to roll her shoulders back and crack her neck before going back to work. It wasn't easy, those many years without practice "But there's a fire in the Town Square if you're interested, it may be more to your liking."

It was a hell of an orgy, that's what it was. Katherine had been tempted to go hunt there the years before, but she could never work up the courage to do anything but play her part as Lady Mayor and down a few glasses just for show. Marguerite would have known, Allie would have known. What would her sister have thought of her? What would Allie have thought?

"I don't do Calanmai any more." Tamlin´s face was sombre and he began chewing on his lip.

He really did mean to spend the Calanmai in prayer and meditation then. She didn't know he had a choice, she had thought it was...necessary? But perhaps there was truth to the rumour that he had Lucien Vanserra perform in his stead once.

"If you say so." She shrugged.

Tamlin turned his head lazily to watch Allie take the way back to the cottage, basket in hand. She had taken lunch with them a little past midday, and then they had all laid down under the budding leaves of a tree to take some rest before he and Katherine would resume work.

Katherine was still asleep, her head rolled to the side, the rich thick lashes veiling her eyes. She was too young for all that work, for all that worry. If the world were a fair place, people like her and Allie would always be safe and happy.

And he would be dead.

It was strange recoiling at the thought. Not long ago, it had been all he had wanted, when he had jumped in the middle of the Hybernian forces, into the very heart of them. Redemption by sacrifice. Or when he had let go of himself, to live only as the beast, thinking that surely the winter would do it, and he would fade into nothing. That didn't work either.

And he realized that for the first time, for some reason, laying there under the flecks of light that filtered through the budding leaves, he was glad that it didn't.

Tamlin risked another glance at Katherine. Not for some reason, for that touch. The night before she had put her warm hands around his as a reflex, but that morning she had willingly, unflinchingly, touched his face, all because she thought he needed some sun filter, as if he cared about that sort of vanity. It had taken all of him not to sigh and close his eyes under the gentle strokes.

It had been too long, it had been forever since anyone had been brave enough to touch him, and she had done it without a moment´s hesitation, as if he were just anyone.

The rhythm of her breathing changed and he looked away, up to the few clouds rolling by. Katherine got up swiftly and stretched her back.

"Are you ready to go back to work?"

"Yes." He jumped back to his feet.

The magic necessary to work the ploughs taxed the muscles of his back, arms, core, everything, and demanded an absurd focus to keep them coordinated. Working the fields left space for nothing else. It was a blessing.

"Good." Katherine nodded, leading the way, steps light on the cold ground, her shoulders back and chin up. An owner of her land, a mistress of the earth.

His court was made of people like her. The court that had been his. The farmers, the shepherds, the hands that had once fed all of Prythian, clothed all of them, from the leather the Illyrians wore to the oranges Kallias´ folk liked so much, the greens that Tarquin´s court loved to serve with their seafood, it was all their work, their pride.

At least it had been once, but for years now…

The Calanmai was coming again. He wouldn't go to the fire at the Town Square, or any fire at all. It would be impossible for him not to be recognized, and it would be no use, who would want to any way?

No, he would rather spend this Calanmai like all others since everything crumbled down: trashing the trees in the nearest woods, channelling through violence what he should have channelled through that life-creating force, until he was too exhausted to stand. And then he would curl up on the tangle of tree roots and pass out until the sun awoke him. It wouldn't be hard to glamour the cuts and bruises.

"I don't think I have ever thanked you for taking on greenhouse duty." Katherine´s voice brought him out of his thoughts.

"There´s no need to thank me, I'm glad to be of help."

He hadn't even done anything, it was just that the plants liked him. Or something like that, he assumed.

"Thank you, any way. It means a lot to us." There was something else in her voice, something below what she was saying.

She looked at him and smiled with that same friendliness she had for Marguerite or Old Duncan.

"It's no problem." The sincerity of that smile disarmed him. He was just anyone to her "You are not scared of me."

He had no idea why on earth did that come out aloud, but Katherine just turned back to her work.

"I'm not."

Any more. Those were the words that she didn't say, but he could feel floating in the cool late-winter air. It didn't matter that she had been before, what mattered was that at least now he wasn't a monster in her eyes. There were now two people in his court, in the world, that didn't think he was a monster. Perhaps three.

"I'm glad." He tried not to smile too broadly.

The sound of the earth being dug into by the ploughs was soft and promising, if a bit raspy.

"I've wondered what it's like to have people be afraid of you." That was news to him, Katherine didn't usually disclose much about herself "I think I'd feel safer. Knowing anyone would be too scared of me to try anything."

He looked at her, standing proud in her fields, in her farm, a droplet of sweat running down her neck to the kerchief she wore to protect her nape and bosom from the sun. He would keep them safe, her and Allie. Even when he left, he would find himself a clearing nearby so that he could be at hand in case they needed. They deserved peace.

"It's a bit lonely at times."

He immediately regretted saying that. Katherine didn't look helpless in any way, a tall buxom female of strong build, as far as he could tell, and an expression in her eyes that made it clear that she would accept no nonsense from anyone, but she was still just a female, and there was much for one to fear in this world.

If she had thought he was being insensitive, she didn't let it show.

"I hadn't thought of that."

She reached to him, shifting all of the ploughs to one hand, and squeezed his shoulder lightly. He let two of the ploughs drop when he put his hand on top of hers.

"Thank you."

It was easy to see where Allie had gotten her gentleness from.

That was it for today dearies, hope you all have a lovely weekend, Happy Mothers Day!