Team: Chudley Cannons

Position: Chaser 1

Main Prompt: The Bear and the Maiden Fair

Optional Prompts: (3) pairing — a rare pair, (5) relationship type — siblings

TW: internal homophobic thoughts

WC: 2448

Girls

Lucien Finnigan-Brown was nothing like his twin brother Quenton. Where Quenton was athletic, Lucien was a bookworm. Quenton was tall, attractive, and had many girls lining up for his attention.

Lucien tried — he really tried — but he just couldn't manage it. It was as if his brain told him one thing, but then his heart was never really into it.

He wanted to be like his brother, to be athletic and popular, to have the looks and the girls' interests, and yet… Fate had other ideas.

Well, he hated Fate and wanted Fate to change its mind about him.

"Stop staring."

Lucien jumped, turning away from the Quidditch practice and to his twin. He frowned.

"Aren't you supposed to be… captaining them?"

Quenton waved his hand. "I'm watching them."

Lucien nodded, returning his gaze to the Gryffindor Quidditch team. They all flew so well, top of the school table with two wins of more than two hundred points and the final game in two months.

Quenton had been appointed captain after James Potter had finished his time at Hogwarts. James had been a jokester, having fun with the team whenever he'd seen a chance. Quenton took his role seriously and worked them hard.

Lucien had to admit, it was paying off.

Quenton grinned. "I see you're out enjoying the sights again."

Lucien didn't respond.

"Oh, come on," Quenton said, "I know why you're here. It's not the Quidditch you're interested in…"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Lucien replied, averting his gaze from the six flyers above him. "I just want to see how the team is going."

His brother snorted. "Yeah, alright. Whatever you say. We've got twenty minutes left. Let me know how you think they're doing afterwards, will you?"

Lucien nodded as Quenton walked away. When he wasn't looking, Lucien returned his eyes back to the team.

Why couldn't he be like his brother?

…

The team trunched through the portrait hole around five thirty. Lucien was finishing off his Potions essay when a figure collapsed in the chair opposite him.

The scent of mud and sweat filled Lucien's nostrils, but despite the reek, Lucien couldn't help but smile. He set his quill down and looked at the tall, brown-haired, blue-eyed Beater opposite him.

Hugo Granger-Weasley was covered in muck. It had started raining towards the end of the training session, prompting Lucien to hurry inside. But Quenton had pushed the team a little longer, telling them that Quidditch wasn't going to be cancelled for a little rain.

"I saw you watching," Hugo said to initiate the conversation.

Lucien flushed. "I was watching Gabrielle, you know…"

A puzzled look flashed across Hugo's face. "Okay… I meant the team, but… you fancy Gabrielle?"

Lucien's flush deepened. Don't all the blokes like Gabrielle?

Hugo moved on. "Anyway, your brother had us practice real hard today." He smiled. "Was fun."

Lucien, who really was rather indifferent to Quidditch, didn't think getting rain and mud over him, sounded fun, but who was he to judge? Hugo was in his sixth year and had only just made the team after trying every year. He'd really wanted to be Keeper, but James had always been better, and then it had been Gabrielle. But Quenton said he'd make a decent Beater.

And he was.

Lucien grunted in response and stared back down at his almost-finished essay.

"Er, have you thought about the Christmas Eve Ball?" Hugo interrupted.

Lucien's cheeks turned faintly red, and he kept his eyes on the parchment. He would have preferred not to think about that stupid tradition Professor Longbottom had introduced many years ago. "You know… was thinking of asking Gabrielle."

Hugo looked at Lucien quizzically. "You've never mentioned fancying her before."

Lucien's blush deepened. "It's a new thing… she looked good… in the sky."

He could feel Hugo's eyes on him, though he pretended to be reading over his essay.

"Alright then," Hugo said after a moment, sounding confused, "well she probably has half the school asking her, so if she turns you down… maybe come with me."

"W-what?" Lucien looked up at his friend, eyes wide, cheeks inflamed.

"I mean as friends," Hugo added.

"People aren't going to think that, though, are they?" Lucien replied. "I mean…"

Hugo sighed, looking mildly disappointed. But he nodded. "Yeah, whatever. Well, I'm going to find a bath and clean up. I'll see you at dinner. Let me know how it goes with Gabrielle."

Lucien watched as Hugo disappeared up the staircase. He couldn't go with Hugo to the Ball, because everyone knew that Hugo was gay. And that was fine, because Hugo was comfortable and open about that. It didn't make Lucien like him any less. But if Lucien went with Hugo, then everyone would assume that Lucien was gay, and Lucien wasn't gay. He liked girls, and one day, he was going to marry a girl, because that was what was supposed to happen. Girls were nice, girls were pretty, and he was going to find a girl date to the Ball.

Just maybe not Gabrielle.

…

Lucien was fairly certain Lily Potter was attending the Ball with him because Hugo had begged her. And Lily was rather fond of her cousin. But she didn't look happy about it.

Hugo had a date himself, Destiny Tippett, another sixth year Gryffindor. Lucien didn't know much about her despite that she and Hugo had been friends since day one in their first year. They were best friends.

Destiny didn't have many other friends, so Hugo had asked her to go with him. She had been delighted. Lucien always suspected that Destiny was perhaps a little bit in love with Hugo despite knowing that he didn't feel the same way. Or maybe she was just so happy to have a date that she didn't care who it was with.

Lucien watched the pair dancing across the room. He'd tried to dance with Lily, but he really wasn't any good. Neither was Hugo, and Destiny certainly wasn't, but they appeared to be having fun regardless.

Lily huffed, dropping her arms from around him. "Maybe you should have just asked Destiny if you fancy her so much you keep watching her."

"I don't like Destiny!" Lucien retorted, his tone strained.

Lily gave a knowing smile and a slight chuckled. "I know you don't. But my statement still stands for my cousin, you know?"

Lucien's heart rate quickened. "What… what do you mean?"

Lily rolled her eyes. "Well, if it's not Destiny you're staring at — who happens to be a really lovely girl and you could do a lot worse than her — then it's Hugo."

"I'm not… I'm not staring," Lucien protested.

"Of course you aren't," Lily answered drily. They were roughly the same height, so Lily looked him directly in the eye. "You know it's okay to be gay."

"I'm not gay!" Lucien said fiercely, feeling anger bubble inside him. Lily had no right…

"Okay," Lily answered, seeming to realise she might have overstepped. "But I'm just saying… it's okay… if you are…"

"Well, I'm not!" Lucien growled. He stepped away from the red-haired girl. "I think I'm going to go to bed."

"Lucien, I didn't mean…"

But Lucien kept on walking, not even bothering to turn around to see what Hugo and Destiny were doing.

Lily wasn't the first person to make a comment like that — Quenton had asked him once if he was gay, and his big sister Jasmine had apparently put him up to it. Why did people think that? And why did they pry? Lucien didn't go around asking everyone what their sexuality was, so why did they do it to him?

Besides, he liked girls. He'd noticed Gabrielle's low cut dress, like all the other blokes in the room.

"Lucien."

Lucien stopped halfway up the stairs, cringing at the voice now behind him.

"Where are you going?" Hugo asked.

"To bed."

"Why?"

Lucien heard footsteps and then felt the large figure of his friend beside him.

"I've just had enough, alright?" Lucien snapped.

"Okay," Hugo said, nodding. "Did… something happen?"

"No." Lucien gritted his teeth.

"Okay." Hugo stood there, and Lucien finally turned to face the much taller boy. Hugo wore brand new dress robes, black all over with a white bowtie. It suited him, fitting the curve of his shoulders. He'd even combed his hair, used some charm or another to make it stick the way he wanted.

Some would say he was… handsome. Attractive. Merlin's pants, Hugo Granger-Weasley was attractive. All blokes were.

Lucien didn't know what came over him, but perhaps he was sick of people assuming. Maybe he wanted to give them reason to talk.

There he stood on the stairs, and he flung himself at Hugo, pressing his lips against the boy. At first, Hugo didn't respond, shocked by the turn of events, but after a moment, he felt Hugo kiss him back. He felt Hugo's body press against his, and his hands move to Lucien's waist.

He'd kissed girls before, because that was what he was supposed to do, but that had always felt wrong. This, though… this felt right. It felt better than any other kiss. And whilst part of it was to do with the boy he was kissing, he wasn't the first boy Lucien realised he'd wanted to kiss.

Music played in the distance, but Lucien barely noticed. The only sound was their heavy breathing.

Hugo broke the kiss, his eyes wide, but happy. "I… I had no idea you felt… that way about me," he whispered.

Lucien didn't respond.

A silence fell between them, and then Hugo spoke again, as if in awe of the moment. "Let's… let's get out of here."

Lucien could only nod, confused by what was happening. He'd just kissed a boy. It was so far from what he'd ever imagined of himself that he wasn't sure how to respond. He shouldn't want to kiss boys. He should want to kiss girls. Girls were who boys liked, and yet… he never had. He'd tried. He'd tried so hard to like girls, but it almost felt like the harder he tried to force the matter, the less he liked them.

A large, freckled hand closed around his, and Lucien met the gaze of his friend. Hugo looked… happy. Like he had waited for this moment for a long time.

The realisation hit him like a punch to the gut. Hugo had waited for this moment and Lucien had ignored it.

He wrenched his hand away. "I shouldn't have done that," he said. And then he turned, leaving his friend standing on the staircase with a broken heart.

…

"Lucien, about what happened —"

Lucien jumped to his feet, closing his books with a sharp snap. He glared at Hugo.

"Nothing happened!" he spat. "I've told you that. It's all in your head, Hugo."

He marched from the library, once again leaving Hugo behind.

He was in such a hurry that he didn't see Quenton and barrelled straight into him.

"Where are you off to?" Quenton gripped Lucien's shoulders to steady him. His expression changed to one of understanding and Lucien realised that Hugo must have appeared.

Lucien pushed past, head down and kept walking.

Quenton followed.

"Why are you avoiding him?" his brother asked, matching Lucien's steps.

"Because he has it in his head that we snogged at the Ball."

"Because you did," Quenton said. "Lily saw you."

"I didn't!" Lucien protested. "I'd never kiss a guy."

"Lucien…" Quenton began. "Come on…"

Lucien rounded on his twin, eyes fierce. "It didn't happen," he yelled. "Hugo is mistaken."

Lucien marched the rest of the way to Gryffindor tower without stopping. The Fat Lady scolded him for his rudeness but Lucien didn't care.

He went up to his dormitory, collapsed onto his bed and cried.

…

A week later, Hugo cornered Lucien after Transfiguration where he couldn't escape. From the corner of his eye, he saw Lily walk past with a smirk and he couldn't help but wonder if this was a set up.

Hugo looked at him, and Lucien couldn't help but admire the ocean blue of his eyes. He was beautiful.

"You know," Hugo said thoughtfully, "it took me a while to accept it too. That I liked guys instead of girls, I mean."

Lucien opened his mouth to argue but found that he no longer had the energy.

Hugo continued. "I thought something was wrong with me, that I was broken, and it was actually my sister who made me realise that nothing was wrong with me. She said that I was who I was and nothing I did would change that. Then she said that she loved me for who I was."

Lucien swallowed. "But… it's wrong," he whispered.

Hugo shook his head. "It's not. I promise you, it's not wrong. Does it feel wrong?"

Lucien silently shook his head.

"Then it's not." Hugo stared at him.

Lucien sunk his head against the stone wall and sighed. "I just always thought I'd… you know… have a wife one day. Like my parents. Like my brother, one day."

"Yeah… I thought that once too, you know."

"I don't want to be… gay." Lucien looked once again into Hugo's eyes.

"But you are?" It was a question from Hugo, not a statement, and Lucien was eternally grateful for that.

At first he didn't answer, but then slowly, very slowly, he nodded. "I… am."

All Hugo did was nod. He didn't smile triumphantly, or brag about knowing all along like his siblings would have. He just nodded.

"You're my friend, Lucien," he then said, "and I know how you're feeling. I've been there before. It's not easy. But just know that I'm here to help when you need it. When you're ready."

Lucien nodded again. "Thank you."

Hugo smiled down at him and Lucien was suddenly aware of how Hugo kind of had him backed against the wall, and he was a lot bigger than Lucien, which had his mind wandering to what other parts of Hugo were large.

And the thought surprised him, because he'd never allowed his mind to wander that far before. He'd always reeled it in.

This was not what he'd been expecting, but Hugo was right — it was who he was. He couldn't change who he was — he'd tried.

It would be a long road, he thought, to fully accept who he was, but at least he had someone there for him — someone who understood what he was going through. Someone he might even fancy, if he allowed himself to feel his feelings.

And that made it a whole lot easier.

This round was soooooooo hard. And I have been moving, so this story was a tad rushed. But this is actually a head canon I've had floating around in my head for a bit, and this story actually connects with When I Have You eventually, if you're reading that! So that's fun!