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Chapter 5: A Smooth-Talking Toad

Sanlo licked his eyeballs. After a bit of thought, he licked them again, all the while staring at the rat who stood guarding the doors. The toad got a bit of satisfaction from the uneasy look on the rat's face. This was diplomacy, after all, and the whole point was to make sure your opponent was left off worse than you.

It was a peculiar kind of rat, with long, sleek fur that draped across the floor and was streaked with red and silver. Sanlo figured the rat came from across Saltswamp, where beasts just looked different. The rat was starting to look a bit more comfortable, so Sanlo licked his eyes again.

The rat gave him a queasy look and squeaked in a peculiar drawl, "No veppuns, right?"

Sanlo smiled. "No, no. Toads aren't similar to eastern vermin, we don't bring weapons everywhere we go." The rat nodded, still looking uneasy.

Of course, if they really wanted to make sure he had no weapons, they'd cut out his tongue. With the right words, he could end dynasties, fell kingdoms, ruin armies. Alas, they are not as smart as me. He shook his head in a sorrowful grievance for their troubles. Of course, no beast is.

Sanlo had to choose the right words, though. For the Toadlands. Anything for the Toadlands, as the Toadlands are everything. Sanlo had one goal for this mission: Keep the Empire from seeking revenge.

A shout came from inside, and the red-and-silver rat jumped with a squeak, then hurriedly opened the doors. "Ze king vill see you now."

Sanlo nodded his thanks to the rat, then walked into the Great Hall of Castle Floret.

A blue carpet split the hall in two, from the great doors to the steps that led to the throne platform. Along the side of the carpet were several tables of dark wood, and along the walls were large statues of heroes past. Sanlo had studied several of these heroes–There was Gru Bronzestoat the Powerful, Aric Squirrelking, Joseph the Bellmaker, Joseph Mouseking I, and many more. As Castle Floret changed hands between rulers, those statues stayed the same. Sanlo considered the irony of a vermin-populated city watched by squirrel and mice statues. The only thing more ironic was the creature that sat on the throne.

A squirrel. Sanlo had hardly believed it when he heard the news, and he hardly believed it now. The Squirrelkings had returned to Floret by allying with a fox? Incredulous! But here was the evidence, sitting before him.

Tharius Squirrelking certainly looked the part. A bit on the overfed side, but with the way he held his head and with his red robes of gold embroidery, nobody could deny this was a beast of power. The Squirrelking was leaning back in his chair, watching Sanlo with indulgent eyes and the smirk of royalty.

Behind Tharius stood a tall, black-cloaked weasel. It looked like it was from the far east, with short, silvery fur. The weasel also looked vaguely familiar, and Sanlo must have seen him in his… previous negotiations with Emperor Silvertung. That made Sanlo a bit uneasy, but he covered it up with a smile and bow and as little grammar as possible.

"Thariusking! Kruurk! See you makehappy Sanlo. I here for Oygamigking, Sanlobrother, kroiik! I here for Toadlands!"

Sanlo saw Tharius nodding, the squirrel's smile growing wider and a proud light of expectations fulfilled shining in those kingly eyes, which brought some satisfaction to Sanlo. If he could convince the Empire of the toad's stupidity, perhaps he could save his beautiful homeland.

"And I am Tharius Squirrelking, Lord and Protector of all Southsward, and…" The squirrel's eyes drifted to the weasel, and his smile faltered a bit. "...Vassal of Vafír Silvertung, Emperor and Protector of his four realms, and King of Irgash. May his lands forever prosper."

Sanlo smiled plaintively, but inside his head the gears were turning. Some enmity between the Squirrelking and the Emperor, perhaps? Interesting. And that weasel's a part of it, whatever it is. "Proser empire makehappy Sanlo, and makehappy Oygamigking, Kruurkl! And, Sanlo hopes, and Oygamigking hopes, that Toadlands prosper with the Empire."

Tharius' smiled sweeter than ever. "Oh? Prosper together, you say? After the… affair with the Toadlands sixteen seasons back?"

Sanlo scowled inwardly. He knew it was a fool's hope, but he had been wishing that that event would be forgotten. Sixteen seasons ago, when Vafír Silvertung first tried to conquer Southsward the first time, the fox had enlisted the toads' help. In a deal Sanlo had negotiated, though, the toads had betrayed Silvertung in exchange for Great South Stream trading rights. That affair caused Silvertung's defeat at the Battle of the Toadlands, but at the time Sanlo had thought Vafír would never return from the west. Well, he had returned, and the only thing Sanlo could do about it was smile and talk and hope it was enough to save his the Toadlands.

"Toads make mistake, makesad. Toads thought… toads sought the best deal. Now, Silvertung bestdeal. Krruulik! Best deal… you bestdeal." Sanlo licked his eyes and hoped that was a good enough explanation to avoid a revenge conquest from the Empire.

Tharius cocked his head. "And what if… a better deal than the Emperor were to present itself?"

Sanlo paused before answering. The question was to gauge the toads' loyalty, but Sanlo also detected a note of real curiosity in Tharius' voice. Would the Squirrelking use us to overthrow Silvertung? That would be… I would want to keep that option open. "You bestdeal, Sanlosay, and Oygamigsay, and what's bestdeal will be bestdeal. Bestdeal is you. Rrrreb."

Tharius nodded, but he still leaned forward, staring at Sanlo, and the toad felt a prick of anxiety. "And was that what you told Silvertung those sixteen seasons ago? Before the chaos of the Toadlands?"

"I no say best deal to Silvertung. But now I say to you: you bestdeal. For you, best deal is toads. Transport… transportation Salamandastron? Rrrreb! Silvertung, you wants transport, yes? Crroik! We loyal to you, we loyal to Southsward, we loyal to Silvertung, and we help win war! Kruurk!"

Finally, Tharius leaned back in his chair, seeming more relaxed. Then, he nodded to the weasel, who held up his paws in a signal.

Something creaked above Sanlo. With a sudden whoosh of air, a huge, dark shape was falling from the ceiling, before landing with splat on the floor.

Sanlo instinctively hopped backwards in surprise. He looked up, and saw a trapdoor swinging open. He looked down, inspecting the dark shape in front of him. When he realized what it was, his smile vanished and was replaced by shock. "King Oygamig! How… You have killed… You kill King! You kill brother! Oygamig…" Sanlo took a deep breath. This was going wrong. King Oygamig, Sanlo's brother, was lying dead before him. He looked up at Tharius, who was sitting back and smirking.

"This is the price for betraying The Empire, toad." He pointed at the corpse of the toad king. "He betrayed us, and he paid the price. Betray us again, and the whole swamp will burn."

Sanlo just gaped, mouth hanging open. His mild feelings of sorrow for his dead brother was overcome by fear that the Toadlands, where Sanlo and Oygamig had fought to unite the tribes, would fall apart again. That Sanlo's perfect country would dissolve into chaos before being overrun by the Empire. Words had failed.

Tharius motioned for the weasel, who handed Tharius a large sheaf of papers. Holding the papers high, Tharius called, "This will be known as the Treaty of Floret. As you represent the royalty of the Toadlands according to your own laws, you have authority to sign it, and you will sign it, or bring suffering to the Toadlands."

Sanlo resisted the urge to hiss. Treaties. Sanlo never liked them. Something written down on such a piece of paper became unchangeable, now matter how hard you negotiated. Treaty writers would do everything they could to leave as little room for interpretation as possible, so that nothing could be manipulated. Sanlo preferred beasts followed their fickle word, so Sanlo could convince them not to. A treaty, though…

Tharius went on. "The treaty outlines the relationship between The Toadlands and The Empire. The Kingdom of Southsward, vassal to The Empire, will control all lands up to the northern coast of the Lesser South Stream and certain areas north of the Lesser South Stream specified in the treaty. Notably, the city of Urgansk will return to Southsward control, along with all lands south of Urgansk, including the lands across the Lesser South Stream. Any toads living in this area will have to move north or become subjects of Southsward and The Empire.

"The Toadlands will become a feudal kingdom, in the fashion of Southsward and Irgash. The days of the savage, infighting tribes are no more. The Toadlands will also enforce a taxation system. The details of these systems are specified in the treaty.

"The Toadlands will not become a full vassal just yet, but will have to pay a tributary of one-fifth the tax earnings directly to The Empire. The first payment will be expected by the end of the summer. This will prepare the Toadlands for full vassalage.

"The Toadlands must also provide friendly relations to The Empire and any of its subjects, and any hostility could lead to conflict. The toadlands must provide a specified force of armed fighters to support The Empire in case of a crisis, and refusal to do so will be taken as an act of hostility.

"The previous primitive system of Trials will be replaced with a sophisticated inheritance system to decide upon a ruler." Tharius looked up from the document. "This would place Dragwa Merggish next in line for the throne, yes?"

This time Sanlo really did hiss. Dragwa and Sanlo were among the threescore younger siblings of Oygamig, and Dragwa was the eldest of the lot. Usually, the Trials did result in the previous ruler's heir taking the throne, but with Dragwa's incompetence, nobody believed she would do it. Now, though… Sanlo realized he was just sitting there in silence.

The weasel was nodding its head. In a voice slimy as toad, he said, "Come forward, Sanlo Merggish. We have a treaty for you to sign."

Sanlo approached the throne slowly, licking his eyes in vain. He reached Tharius, and signed the treaty without a word.

"Head back to your swamp," Tharius said. "I'll be joining you soon."

Turning away, Sanlo hung his head in shame. The Toadlands might not be facing any conquest just yet, but The Empire would just as soon ruin the Toadlands with this treaty. Words had failed.

As he passed the corpse of his brother, Sanlo swallowed determinedly. Words alone had failed, but with words and time… he'd have this Empire begging for mercy.

Author's Note 1: Sanlo is perhaps one of the only characters who's a main protagonist in both TDEv1 and v2. Going back and reading v1, I found the goofy politics of the toad council to be the funnest parts of that story. While that exact plotline won't fit the tone of v2, I want to bring some of those elements across.

Author's Note 2: This politicking, scheming character is the kind of character that is difficult to pull off well. I don't have much experience here, so any advice and feedback is more than welcome. Thank you!