This was inspired by the work of billowsandsmoke. "I Know Not, and I Cannot Know – Yet I Live and I Love" is one of the best, if not the best fanfic I have come across. Their writing and characterization is excellent and it is a beautifully done story.
Submitted for the Quidditch League Tournament, season ten. Position: Beater 2. Prompt: The Dance of Dragons – two perspectives on opposite sides anticipating war. Optional prompts: 3 (a rare pair), 13 (death), and 14 (rainy).
Dissolution
A heavy mist had settled over the grounds. It had been an unusually cold spring and, though it was nearing the end of May, it felt as if winter had yet to fully relinquish its grasp on the world.
Luna didn't mind the cold dampness – certainly it was much more bearable now that her shoes had decided to return. She couldn't help but wonder, though, if the unseasonable weather was warning her. Warning them all. That, in some way, it was a reflection of what was to come.
Indeed, in the past months, a sense of foreboding had been growing on her min – sitting on the edges of her consciousness or lying in the shadows of every thought. It was not a new presence by any means. She was quite used to the haunting melancholy that pervaded even her most joyous of moods. But, though the presence was the same, the feeling was different. It was not content to settle passively in the recesses of her mind, but steadily grew and loomed like a storm cloud threatening to unleash violent lightening at a moment's notice.
Yes, Luna felt, there was certainly something brewing on the horizon. The winds were changing. The ground was shifting. Precarious plans of which she knew nothing were being set into motion. But she didn't yet understand; waiting was her only option. And that was precisely what she decided to do on this dreary Saturday morning. Wait.
But in good company, of course.
She stood between the tall pillars of dark pines, looking up to thoughtfully survey the canopy. The mist was lessened in the woods, but silvery tendrils still roiled between the trunks, transforming the forest into some ethereal dreamscape.
Others, she thought, would surely be afraid to be in the woods in such weather. But the closeness of the air – the dampness against her skin – made her feel safe. It was as if she was being held by the universe.
She smiled to herself at this thought and reached into the satchel that was strung across her shoulder. From it she pulled a brilliantly red chunk of raw meat. She lifted the flesh to her face as if to smell it before making odd clicking noises with her tongue.
The woods were silent for a long while. Luna gazed tranquilly around at the trees, as if waiting for someone to arrive. Soft clicks sounded in the distance, though in the fog it was impossible to tell how far away they truly were. A small smile graced her lips and Luna clicked her tongue again. This time the reply was much closer and to the right. She turned as a horse-like skeletal creature emerged from the ether.
Luna's smile grew wider and she offered the meat to the beast. It approached her with familiarity and gently took the treat from her hand, careful not to nip her fingers with its razor-sharp teeth.
"Where's your baby?" asked the girl airily.
As if the creature understood, it turned its head over its shoulder and clicked its hooked beak twice. A moment later a skinny and awkward foal appeared. Luna greeted the youngster with a smile and crouched down so that she was on its level.
"I brought you something special," she said, digging in her bag. A deep purple liver emerged and was quickly gobbled up by the foal. Luna made to stand up, but before she could, the adult Thestral whipped its head around as if sensing a threat that was just out of sight. Luna paused to listen intently but failed to make out any sound save for the animals' breathing.
Several seconds passed and then the tensed creature relaxed and made an excited clicking noise with its beak. Luna stood and looked inquiringly at the beast.
It blinked at her with round black eyes before nudging her shoulder softly in the direction it had looked.
"Is there something you want to show me?" the girl asked gentle. The adult Thestral continued to nudge at her while the foal pranced excitedly at her feet. "Alright," she said, "let's go."
They lead her a short distance back towards the edge of the forest where there was a clearing amongst the trees. The Care of Magical Creatures class often met here when the weather was mild. In the fog, though, much of the clearing was veiled and Luna could only make out the stone wall at the opposing side.
"What is it?" she asked, turning to her companions. The beast again nudged her shoulder in the direction of the wall.
She looked up in time to see the mist swirl and part to reveal a dark figure silhouetted against the silver of the air.
Though his appearance was sudden, Luna was not startled by it. What was more startling was the fact that she had almost expected him to be there.
She watched as he produced a parcel from his robes and set it on the wall. He then lifted something from it and made the same low clicking noise she had a moment before. It then dawned on her that he, too, had come to visit the Thestrals.
The one that stood closest to her turned its head sharply at the sound, beating its wings several times to announce its presence and hunger. This cleared away the swirling mist just enough so that the potions master was suddenly aware that he was not the only human presence in the clearing.
They locked eyes and the foreboding that Luna had been feeling for the past months suddenly filled her mind. In that instant, she was certain that Professor Snape would either kill or be killed in a months time. There was no uncertainty in that thought. She knew it would happen as plainly as she knew he stood before her now.
But this realization did not startle her. She absorbed the information in a matter of seconds and was soon returned to her usual state of equilibrium. But it did provoke an intense curiosity. From the first day she had stepped foot in the dungeons, she knew an aura of intense sadness and death clung perpetually to the potions professor. Five years later, though, she hadn't picked up any leads on the cause and let it lie unresolved. Now, though, she was certain that something was about to break. She made up her mind and crossed the clearing.
"Good morning, Professor," she said lightly, greeting him as if they were meeting in some usual place like the Entrance Hall.
"You startled me," he said. The accusation he had intended was not present in his voice. He quickly corrected this by adding more severely, "How is it, Ms. Lovegood, that after five years of schooling, you've failed to gather that the forest and strictly out-of-bounds for students?"
"Oh, I am aware," she said simply. His gaze narrowed, but he chose not to point out her insolence. After five years of doing battle with this singular girl, he knew well enough now that derision and detention meant nothing to her.
"Then, pray tell, why you consider yourself exempt from following these rules?"
"I don't think I'm breaking any rules, Professor. Hagrid said that it would be alright if I came to this clearing once in a while to feed the Thestrals."
"Did he," he sneered.
Though the comment was rhetorical, Luna answered with a nod. "It felt right to come see them today," she said, "with the feeling of impending death so heavy in the air." Though Snape was, by now, used to the girl's nonsensical babble, this particular comment demanded his attention.
"I thought that perhaps they would provide me with some clarity on the matter," the girl continued.
"And did they?" the professor mused.
"In a way," said the girl. She abruptly turned to look at him. Her piercing grey eyes seemed to peer into the darkest recesses of his soul. He resisted the urge to squirm under the gaze. "I don't mean to alarm you, Professor," she said, somehow reading his discomfort, "But, though I know you have always carried with you a sadness and a certain regard for death, it is stronger now."
Snape was taken aback. It was all he could do to retain his composure. She couldn't know, could she?
"What do you mean?" he asked harshly – harsher than he intended to.
"That you and Death will be very close in a very short time." She said this simply, as if merely commenting on the weather.
For once in his life, Severus Snape was speechless. He opened his mouth several times as if to speak, but the words refused to be formed.
"But I trust that you know which side of it you'll be on," added the girl. She then flashed him a sympathetic smile, before pulling a particularly bloody slice of meat from her bag and holding it out to one of the creatures. He chose his next words carefully.
"You think . . . I'm going . . . to die?"
"That is a possibility," said the girl, her attention still fixed on the creatures before them. "I suppose death does come for us all in the end," she added simply.
"Yes. It does," he said quietly. They stood in silence for a long moment before the professor turned abruptly on his heel and rejoined the shadows of the mist. Luna turned and watched him go. Once his dissolution was complete, she returned her attention to the Thestrals – and to the bacon that her professor had left on the wall.
This was, indeed, the last time she spoke to the potions master.