Second Thoughts About John

By KathyG

Summary: In my story, "Echoes from the Darkness," Mycroft tells John that he now regards John as family, same as Sherlock does. What sparked that change in Mycroft's heart? This post-"Sherlock" story , which is set immediately after the events of "The Final Problem," seeks to explain how that could have happened. Thanks to BesleyBean and sgam76 for beta-reading this story for me!

Mycroft sat down in a dark-brown leather armchair in his hotel room; its cushion sank underneath his weight as he leaned against it. After their harrowing ordeal that day, he and Lestrade had taken rooms in one of the local hotels an hour before, but not before making sure that Sherlock was all right—physically, at least. Since John had spent several harrowing hours in a well and had come close to drowning, he was spending the night in a local hospital in York Hospital; if the doctors were satisfied that he was also all right, he would be released in the morning. Sherlock was spending the night with him. Once John was released from hospital, the three of them and Lestrade would take the train back to London.

Mycroft was reasonably satisfied that John would be released in the morning. When he had visited his brother and John in the latter's hospital room, there had been no signs of complications from John's ordeal. Physically, we're all right, all of us, he thought. But emotionally, it's a different story. I fear it's going to take Sherlock a long time to recover from what Eurus has done to him. He's going to have to return to seeing Dr. Arquette once more; good thing I phoned the doctor after I checked in. Dr. Arquette was the MI6 psychiatrist who had treated Sherlock in the past, both immediately following Sherlock's two-year hiatus, and again when Sherlock had become suicidally depressed within a few months after his return to England.*

This has been a truly harrowing time, he thought, shaking his head, and glancing at the stars glittering outside his window. First Eurus blows up Sherlock's flat with the three of us inside it, and then she entraps us in Sherrinford and forces us to play a succession of deadly games. One of those games almost cost Sherlock his life, because he chose to end his own life rather than mine or John's. He sighed. It is most fortunate that Eurus had no particular desire that day to see Sherlock dead, because otherwise, I would be planning my brother's funeral. As it is, we came very close to having to plan John's. He shuddered at that thought and shifted position on the chair's comfortable cushion.

That last thought, and the emotion that had just run through Mycroft at the prospect, made him stop and take notice. Sitting up, he reached toward the side table and picked up a glass of wine he had poured himself before sitting down. Always before, it was Sherlock, his baby brother, who had sparked that emotion. While he had never had any desire to see John dead, not least because his demise would have left Sherlock alone once more, his priorities, in the past, had always been Sherlock, the country, and John, in that order. John is not a member of our family, despite Sherlock's protests, so it stands to reason that was always the case, he thought, sipping his wine. Even just two days ago, when Eurus exploded Sherlock's apartment with that patience grenade, I didn't want John in on our discussion for that very reason. So, what's changed since then?

The glass clinked as Mycroft set it on the side table and leaned back to consider, gently rubbing his fingertips over the table's smooth surface. He spent the next several minutes looking back over the past five years since John had first come into their lives. At first, his main concern had been that John look after Sherlock on Mycroft's behalf, and he had never hesitated to "kidnap" John for a chat about Sherlock if he felt the need was there.

And I'll have to be honest with myself—I will do it again in the future, when the need arises, he thought. **And yet, once during his first months as Sherlock's flatmate, I stopped by their flat not to ask for his help with Sherlock, but to tell him to allow others to help him. Even then, though I was reluctant to admit it even to myself, I harboured a measure of concern for him, for his welfare. Of course, I did have a practical reason for my concern; I knew that if John was put out of commission because he refused to allow others to help him, he would be unable to help my brother. And all the times I've helped John, in some way, have been sparked in large part by that same concern, or because Sherlock asked me to.

He rolled his eyes. So, what's changed? Has John really become that important, that close—not just to Sherlock, but to me, as well? Tonight, when I learned that Eurus had trapped him in a well—the same way that she had previously drowned Victor in—and that she had come dangerously close to drowning John as well, I actually felt something close to terror. He shook his head. The same terror I have always felt for Sherlock when he's been in danger. Even now, I'm anxious to hear what John's doctor will say in the morning.

Mycroft gazed down at his lap for a long moment, thinking, and then he took another sip of his wine. It's time—and past time—that I faced the truth. And the truth is, I do care for John. Not only for what he can do for my brother, but for himself, for his own welfare. And I agree with Sherlock now—John is family, surrogate family. He'll never be family by birth or adoption, but he has become a surrogate brother to us both, especially Sherlock. And, I strongly suspect, a surrogate son to Mummy and Father.

He folded his right leg over his left. I won't tell John yet, though. I will continue to deal with him as I have, and whenever the need arises, I'll call him in for a chat about Sherlock. I do have to extend the air of superiority as long as possible, after all. He smirked at the thought. But there may come a time in the future when it'll be necessary to tell him. If it does, I will.

Mycroft rose to his feet and approached the nightstand where the phone was. It was time to phone Sherlock, to find out how John was doing.

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*Dr. Arquette is an O.C. in two of sgam76's stories, "Scheherezade" and "A Long Walk Down a Dusty Road."

**The visit is told in my story, "John and Mycroft's Discussion".

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