CHAPTER 6!

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Gamzee leaned back, flopping onto the ground. "Yeah. This crazy ass motherfucker had a shit ton of em just chillin in her basement. I fell ass-first into that shit. Motherfucking miracle that I don't smell like Ecto-goo anymore."

Each of the 9 other trolls present stared at Jade for a few moments before backing away from her by a few feet. Jade's face went highlighter green.

"No wait! Let me explain! It's not..."

"Not Fucking WHAT? You're a weird ass pervert troll! What the fuck goes through your twisted ass mind?" Karkat stared at her, his face horrified.

"No! It's not like I WANTED those buckets. It's just..." She fell silent for a few moments.

"Just what?" Kanaya asked, her voice soothing, and inviting. Jade looked up at her.

"Well..." She looked back down at her hands. "Sometimes the imperial drones would discover my hive... Since my hive isn't registered... they know immediately that I'm a mutant... so they attack..."

"What the fuck does this have to do with your weird bucket collecting fetish?" Karkat spat.

"Just calm down and let me finish!" Jade retorted. Karkat fell silent, pouting a bit. "Geez. Thank you!" She crossed her arms across her chest, "You see, sometimes... okay most of the time... They discovered my house as they were returning from their Bucket Collecting Rounds... So when they attacked... they had their... errm... cargo with them..."

"Oh..." The trolls said in unison. Jade's blush migrated to her ears.

"Yeah... and it's not like I can just make them disappear... so I just hid them in the corner... And avoided them... I never expected a visitor... So when Gamzee showed up, I told him to stay away from the corner! But he... uhh..."

"I fell in bro. Got that shit all over me. Top to mother fucking bottom. Smelled like a mother fucking Troll Brothel up in that shit. Miracles were not present."

"Sorry about that, by the way."

"Nah it's cool Sis. Took a motherfucking miracle to get that shit outta my hair though... I think I've still got some stuck in the tips." He lifted his hand from where it rested on the ground, and lifted it to his hair, twisting a lock in between his fingers, frowning slightly.

Just at that moment, all watching trolls could no longer keep their shit together. In unison, which seemed to be a fad at the moment, all but Tavros fell backwards laughing (Tavros only giggled a little, his face growing slightly brown). Jade stared at the trolls for a moment, and then the humor of the situation dawned on her, and she also giggled. Gamzee smiled happily, glad that he could bring happiness to his fellow trolls.

"Wwhat the fuck is going on? And wwho the fuck is she? Wwhy the fuck is she here? And wwhere the fuck is dinner?" The laughing stopped as Jade turned around, seeing her 11th troll. He was rather attractive, his glasses magnifying his cute eyes, his scarf falling to his waist on both sides of the squiggly sign on his shirt. He stared down at everyone rolling on the ground, frowning. Jade, although she recognized his handsome qualities, realized rather quickly that he probably had 4 empty quadrants because of his rotten personality. She frowned in return to his own sour face, deciding he needed some serious help.

She jumped to her feet, happily walking over to the troll with the purple streaked hair. "Hi! I'm Jade! I'm going to be joining your guys's party starting today! What's your name?" She held her hand out in a friendly gesture. His frown quickly dissapated, and his face grew a light shade of purple as he looked at her hand. He took it lightly, his anger turning into shyness. His hand was slightly sweaty. As he gripped her hand, and didn't let go, she began to regret her decision to greet him.

"Eridan. Eridan Ampora. It's a pleasure to meet you. I wwill try to treat you wwith the utmost of respect!" He bent down on one knee, still holding her hand, and kissed it, closing his eyes. Her face twisted into an expression of shock and horror as she quickly pulled her hand away from his, opening and closing her mouth, unsure as how to respond. Eridan stood, towering over her. He reached out his hand, and lightly grabbed a lock of her hair, lifting it to his nose. He scooted closer to her, inches from her face. "ahh. You smell lovvely, miss. These are dangerous wwoods... May I kiss you?"

"WHAAT?" She cried, flustered, trying to pull away. He wrapped an arm around her waist, closing his eyes, and the few inches between their faces.

Purple flashed across Jade's line of vision, and she was suddenly, instead of being kissed by Ampora, was watching as Eridan closed in on Gamzee. He kissed the purple bard passionately, wrapping his arm tighter around Gamzee's muscular waist. After a few seconds, Jade smirked. Eridan's hand had moved slightly down Gamzee's waist, and now rested on Gamzee's butt. It froze up. Eridan's eyes shot open as his whole body followed the suit of his hand. Gamzee smirked at him, their lips still touching. He winked at Ampora, and Ampora quickly pulled away, coughing and spitting. Gamzee also wiped his lips, the light smirk on his lips turning into a full grin.

"Shit, man. Didn't know you felt like that about me. You're totally redroming some serious fuckshit. Wanna get down with the Honkster, do ya? Fillin buckets with little fishy clowns?"

"Ww...ww...ww..." Eridan stuttered.

"Mother fucking miracles in buckets is what I say. But bro, Why didn't you tell me earlier? We coulda done that a long time ago!" He winked again, and Ampora wretched.

"WWHAT THE FUCK, GAMZEE! I WWAS TRYING TO KISS JADE! WWHY DID YOU GET IN THE WWAY?"

Gamzee tilted his head to the side, faking confusion. "I have no idea what the fuck you're talking about, man. We just snogged it up, and you're talking about little Lime-Blood over there? I get it. We're through. This quadrant ends before it even starts!" He twists away from Ampora, flopping back onto the ground, smiling to himself as Ampora stares at him, dumbstruck. He looks at Jade. She mouths a quiet "Thank you." He smiles, nods his head slightly, and winks. She looks away.

"I swwear. You're one crazy bitch, Gamzee. Wwhat the fuck goes through your twwisted mind?"

"Nothing much. Horns n shit."

"Wwhatevver!" Eridan joins the circle of trolls, who were all having quite a hard time from laughing their asses off. He kept his distance from both Gamzee and Jade as he plopped down in the dirt. "So. are wwe going to eat soon? I'm starvved!"

"Oh... uhh... Eridan. I just, uhh... finished cooking. If you are hungry... It's about time to... uhh... eat." The unfamiliar voice interrupted Jade's thoughts. She turned around to see another troll shyly standing quite a distance from the rest of the group, wearing a pink and frilly apron, a ladle in his hand. He wore dark square shades, that were thoroughly cracked, and one of his horns seemed to be missing. She took a closer look, and realized it wasn't missing, it was just broken, only a small piece of the base left at the bottom. He returned her gaze, sweating a little more as he turned his face toward her. He lifted a hand, and waved slightly at her, smiling. "Uhh… Hi. I'm guessing you are the cause of all of the excitement occurring tonight." He took a quick glance to the people around. "It seems you have met everyone else. I am Equius. I apologize for the lack of appearance before this point. I have been slaving over a hot stove making food for the high- err…. For everyone… The food is ready, if anyone wants to eat now." He shyly twiddled with the ladle in his hand, bending it into odd shapes. He looked down at it, and cursed loudly, chucking the now useless kitchen utensil across the hideout. It slammed into a tree, knocking it down. The tree crashed right next to Nepeta, scaring her awake from her catnap. She jumped, blinking a few times before she noticed Equius.

"Oh! Equius!" She loped over to him, throwing her arms around his neck, smiling widely. Equius returned her hug softly, smiling like an older brother. Jade could almost see the diamond encasing their moirail filled hug. She couldn't help but smile at the cuteness of it, but frown in her own jealousy.

*I want a moirail!* she pouted to herself. Equius, noticing her frowning smile, pulled away from Nepeta.

"Uhh… Food. Follow me." He walked away, the crowd of hungry trolls following silently behind.

Lusus meat.

'Nuff said.

When they were finished eating, Equius silently stood, walking over to Gamzee, and taking his plate. It shattered in his hands. Jade couldn't help but laugh as she stood, and helped Equius clean the plates, using her much more delicate touch to pick up, and clean each dish. When all was clean, they returned to their original hanging place, where Sollux set to work building a fire. Jade would have joined the rest of the trolls in their merrymaking, but she could already feel the lead setting in her legs and eyelids. She quietly excused herself, finding a secluded corner to curl up in, closing her eyes.

Right before she drifted off to sleep, she felt a something brush against her foot. She slowly opened her eyes. She watched silently as Gamzee slowly put a blanket over her, pulling it up to her neck. He looked into her eyes, and she smiled.

"Thank you." She whispered sleepily. Gamzee smiled, nodding slightly as he lay down a few feet away from her.

"No motherfucking problem, my sister. Just me being all quadrant fuck-tastic. You going redrom on me yet?"

She would have replied if she hadn't fallen asleep after "sister."