Chapter XVIII
Your Inbox is the Window to your Soul!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
Subject: Meeting tomorrow!
No time for niceties.
We are all meeting tomorrow, and we're going to film this mockumentary, and it's going to be perfect!
Meet sharp at Tiffany's 6:00 am.
Yours cordially
Blair
To: blaircorneliawaldorf
From: Chuck (imchuckbass)
Subject: Seriously?
What happened to your queenblairaudreytiffany account? It used to be so endearing.
Yours leeringly
Chuck Bass.
To: imchuckbass
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
RE: Seriously?
Shut up and grow up, in that order. And while you're at it look up the word 'secret' in the dictionary! It does not include having a bouquet of peonies delivered to my dinner table, when my mother is home!
Yours scathingly
Blair.
To: blaircorneliawaldorf
From: Chuck (imchuckbass)
RE: Seriously?
Touchy aren't we? Btw I prefer the words clandestine affair. Sounds more mysterious and alluring.
And I know you loved them. I wish I was there to see the look on your face when you read the card at the table…
Yours smugly
Chuck
To: imchuckbass
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
RE: Seriously?
THAT WAS NOT FUNNY!
My mother took the card and read it before I could stop her. It took me an hour to convince her that I was NOT pregnant!
As punishment you will not be kissing, touching or even looking at me until this whole assignment is over. And then only if you behave!
And btw, me impregnated by a blonde Rusian model named Sergei? Please, we all know I have far better standards and taste! You being the exception!
Blair
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Dan (cellardoor)
Subject: REAL place to meet!
Hey guys
Blair and I discussed this earlier and we will NOT be filming at Tiffany's. It's completely impractical. So anyone got a place we can shoot in?
Dan.
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Dan (cellardoor); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Chuck (imchuckbass)
RE: REAL place to meet!
My suite is always open for business… as some of you would know…
CB
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
Subject: I don't think so!
Basshole we want a place to shoot in, not shoot up in!
And if you think Tiffany's isn't 'appropriate' then we'll have it at your place, Humphrey, seeing as the production probably can't get any worse. We might as well add a tacky loft!
Blair W.
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Dan (cellardoor)
RE: I don't think so!
We're definitely NOT doing it at mine. I'm not having the whole student body dissect the décor of my loft. It's bad enough they analyse my sandwiches every day!
Dan.
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
Subject: How about…
Serena, you're silent, I take that as assent. We shall film it at your place then!
BW.
To: Nate (xbplaya); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Serena (vanillaicecream)
RE: Sorry but…
I would, but the second Cold War is going on here. Mom is driving me crazy! D = Sorry B, but no can do. = (
xxxx
S
To: vanillaicecream
From: Dan (cellardoor)
Subject: Hey
I hope everything is okay?
To: cellardoor
From: Serena (vanillaicecream)
RE : Hey
Why wouldn't it be?
To: vanillaicecream
From: Dan (cellardoor)
RE: Hey
Are you mad at me?
To: cellardoor
From: Serena (vanillaicecream)
RE : Hey
Why would I be?
To: vanillaicecream
From: Dan (cellardoor)
RE: Hey
I have no idea? That's why I asked...
To: cellardoor
From: Serena (vanillaicecream)
RE : Hey
Can we talk about it later...
To: vanillaicecream
From: Dan (cellardoor)
RE: Hey
I guess...?
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Dan (cellardoor); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Chuck (imchuckbass)
Subject: Speculative…
I'm shocked and slightly impressed Serena knows what the Cold War is. Unless she meant cold sore? Now that I could believe she is very knowledgeable about…
CB
To: Nate (xbplaya); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Serena (vanillaicecream)
RE: Speculative
OMG SHUT UP YOU JERK!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Dan (cellardoor); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Chuck (imchuckbass)
RE: Speculative.
What? If I recall correctly you slept through more history lessons then I did! Thus the only conclusion I can draw is that you misspelt cold sore.
CB
To: Nate (xbplaya); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Serena (vanillaicecream)
RE: Speculative
GTH!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
Subject: STOP!
SHUT IT THE BOTH OF YOU!
You are being incredibly unhelpful, and we have to film this in a day! NOW EITHER HELP ME FIND A PLACE OR I AM GOING TO MAKE BOTH OF YOU REGRET IT!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Dan (cellardoor)
Subject: A thought…
Just an idea, but why don't we have it at your place Blair?
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
RE: A thought…
Absolutely not. My house is a hallowed sanctuary. Nobody sees the inside of it unless I personally invite them! I'm Queen B, Humphrey, some of us have to keep up the standards!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Dan (cellardoor)
RE: A thought…
Oh, so it's okay to show the entire student body my place? But yours is out of bounds?
I thought we lived in a democratic society, filled with equals?
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
RE: A thought…
Precisely.
And we are certainly not equals. Ever heard of the royal prerogative Humphrey?
Go Wikipedia it, and educate yourself!
B.
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Dan (cellardoor)
RE: A thought…
You're using Wikipedia as a source of education?
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
RE: A thought…
I thought I'd give a simple definition that you could understand. Peasants have always found it hard to understand the complex society of their betters!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Dan (cellardoor); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Chuck (imchuckbass)
Subject: And so the mature become the immature…
Now who's being unproductive?
CB
P.S. I'd quit right there Humphrey, before you say something you'll really regret.
To: Nate (xbplaya); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Serena (vanillaicecream)
Subject: SOLUTION! = )
Let's just do at Chuck's suite B, the whole student body has already seen the inside of his place, remember NYE freshman year? And there's no parents there! Problems solved!
Unless you have another reason to object…?
S
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
RE: SOLUTION! = )
I have no other objections, beside common decency! But fine, if that's how you all want it, Chuck's suite it is then. 6am sharp!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Dan (cellardoor); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Chuck (imchuckbass)
Subject: Beauty sleep.
6am? I think not. A man needs his rest. We'll meet at 12.
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
RE: Beauty sleep.
6am!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Serena (vanillaicecream)
RE: Beauty sleep.
12 does sound kind of nice…
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Dan (cellardoor)
RE: Beauty sleep.
12 would be good. That way I can bring Vanessa along after her shift. She can work the camera, she has all the equipment and the software to edit it together.
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
Subject: As if!
This is a school project. No home schooled bohemians allowed! Besides if we're going to do this, we don't want to use a cheap camera you can buy from Wall Mart!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Serena (vanillaicecream)
RE: As if!
B, none of us own actual video camera's, or at least we don't know where they are/how to work the ones our parents own… Besides Vanessa is nice, and like Dan said, she has all the software and knows how to use it.
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
RE: As if!
NO!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Dan (cellardoor)
RE: As if!
YES!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Serena (vanillaicecream)
RE: As if!
YES!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Dan (cellardoor); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
From: Chuck (imchuckbass)
RE: As if!
Even I must admit, though it does pain me to say, this whole ordeal will go faster if we outsource the camera work and editing to the working class, much more suited to that kind of thing. Your best work is in front of the camera anyway Blair…
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
Subject: It's on your heads!
FINE! But if it turns into a French porno and called 'modern expressionism' don't look to me. I'm washing my hands of it as of now!
To: Nate (xbplaya); Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Serena (vanillaicecream)
RE: It's on your heads!
B you know Vanessa won't do that, you're so dramatic sometimes lol. = P But we love you for it!
xoxo
S
To: Nate (xbplaya); Serena (vanillaicecream); Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf)
RE: It's on your heads!
I'm not being dramatic, just realistic!
Fine! I suppose it's settled then…
You better all be there on time!
B.
To: Blair (blaircorneliawaldorf) ,Serena (vanillaicecream), Chuck (imchuckbass); Dan (cellardoor)
From: Nate (xbplaya)
Subject: ?
So, where are we supposed to be meeting?
= S
A/N: Thanks for all the wonderful reviews = ).
Please R&R. Hope you liked = )
Origins of their e-mail addresses:
I imagine Nate just made his e-mail address for Xbox on line, or Chuck/Serena/Blair may even have made it for him Most likely Chuck added the playa part, while Nate was in the toilet. Originally Nate had typed in xboxboy.
Serena, fickle as always and unsure, made hers an old pet name. Of course her account was set up at about the age of 11 to receive all the latest online catalogues, and she hasn't bothered to change it since.
Blair used to have the one Chuck mentioned, but recently changed it because she thought it sounded too childish. The other account is still active, however she uses this one for 'business' matters and to communicate with people not in her close circle of friends. In this case it was 'business'.
Dan, being the writer he is, and with an artistic flare, watched Donny Darko and was inspired to change his from simply DHumphrey to cellardoor. (You'll understand if you've seen the movie = ) ).
Chuck: It speaks for itself = P. The only explanation he will ever need.
PS. This was a formatting nightmare lol. Had to get rid of the at sign and gmail dot com so FF would show the email addresses D =. So though it breaks the realism slightly = (, just imagine the end part of the email address.