The car turned the bend and was in a scene from one of the old movie musicals. The guide continued his narration.
" Hello everyone and welcome to the Great Movie Ride. Once again, my name is Chris, and I'll be taking you from this Hollywood soundstage right into the middle of the action of the greatest films ever made, all on one tour. But between you and me, this is no ordinary tour because the Great Movie Ride brings these movies to life, and puts you right in the middle of the action.
"First let's visit some of those great Hollywood musicals starting with the 1933 Busby Burkley musical Extravaganza, Foot Light Parade. Starring James Cagney, Ruby Keeler and Dick Powel."
The car turned around another bend and went under an arch to the famous scene of Don Lockwood swinging on the lamp post from Singin' in the Rain.
"Then in 1952, Gene Kelly was singin' in the rain. Did you know Gene Kelly Co-Directed this film?"
The car quickly pulled through the small scene, under another arch, and into the next scene which was of rooftops with silouettes of dancing chimney sweeps. Ahead of and above the car, two animatronics (one of Mary Poppins and one of Bert) sing "Chim Chim Cheree". Amy smiled upon entering the scene and remarked, "I always loved this movie..."
The Doctor looked at the animatronics for a moment and remarked, "You know, these actually look a great deal like them... haven't seen either of them in a great while. I should probably go visit them soon..."
Amy and Rory turned to the Doctor. "You mean, you were there during the filming of the movie?" Rory asked.
"No! I mean actually visit Mary and Bert... Oh... you didn't know I knew them? Well, that's a story for another time..." he responded as a set of doors opened and the car pulled into the next scene.
The guide remarked, "Hold on to those wallets and purses folks. This doesn't look like a very good neighborhood," as they pulled into a set of a dirty alleyway and street.
"In fact, it looks a lot like the Underworld. The scene of such classic gangster films like the Public Enemy. Starring one of my favorite tough guys, James Cagney..." The car pulled around another bend to reveal an animatronic of Cagney quoting lines from Public Enemy, and it continued forward towards a stoplight and a two animatronics of gangsters saying: "Somebody coming! Somebody coming! Get down!" "Ah, ah, is it them?" "Nah, just a bunch o' rubberneckin' tourists..." Just then, the formerly green stoplight turned red, and a voice could be heard from the shadows on the other side of the scene saying, "Shut up you two, you want to blow our cover?"
At the third voice, the Doctor, Amy, and Rory all looked at each other. It was a familiar voice, though the accent was unfamiliar.
The ride car stopped in front of the red light, and the guide said, "Sorry about the delay, folks, but I don't want to run a red light, even if it is just a movie."
The familiar voice spoke again, this time to the guide. "Pssst, hey you!"
The guide turned towards a figure standing in the shadows to the left of the vehicle and responded, "Are you talking to me? Are you talkin' to me?"
The figure stepped out of the shadows, and the Ponds' and the Doctor's eyes widened. The Doctor muttered under his breath, "How even...?!"
Of course it was River. She was wearing a matching black with white pinstripe jacket and pencil skirt with a red shirt underneath, and her hair was pulled back into a loose bun at her neck. She was also wearing a black fedora and holding a pistol which she gestured with as she spoke.
"No, tough guy, I'm talkin' to da dame in da funny-lookin' outfit over there. Yeah, I'm talkin' to you! Come 'ere!" She motioned to the guide who shook his head and responded:
"Uh, I'm not supposed to leave my vehicle..."
River cocked the pistol and aimed it at the guide. "I said get over 'ere."
"Alright, whatever you say!..." the guide said quickly as he jumped out of the car and walked up to River. Just then, a cat rattled some of the trash cans that the other thugs were hiding behind, startling both River and the guide. River looked at the guide.
"Da heat's on, see? And your fancy car's my ticket outta here. So beat it!"
The guide shook his head. "You're making a big mista-"
River interrupted him. "I said scram!"
The guide began to back away from her. "But I can't leave in the middle of a movie!"
Just then a 1930's car pulled out on the opposite of the ride vehicle, and one of the animatronic thugs yelled, "Here dey come, boss!"
River looked over at the car then back at the guide. "Go on, beat it, ya sap!"
"Yeah... maybe on second thought... I could go get some popcorn!" And with that, he ran out of the scene.
Just as he left, the gangsters in the car opened fire on the two thugs and River, who all proceeded to shoot back; Everyone in the ride vehicle stuck in the crossfire. Suddenly, one of the thugs in the back yelled out, "They got Squid!"
River turned and looked at them as she pulled out another pistol. "I hear ya! Just keep rubbin' them out!" She turned back to the car and continued to fire, yelling, "Hey, you muggs, this ain't a fair fight!..."
The one thug repeated again, "Squid's hit real bad, boss!"
River rolled her eyes and replied, "You're next if ya don't shut up!" Just then, the 1930's car pulled back, out of sight. River turned and ran down to the guide's spot in the ride vehicle saying, "Everybody, sit tight!" She looked up and the red light, then looked back to everyone in the car and said, "Runnin' a red light 's against the law, and I never break the law! Watch this..." She pulled out another pistol and shot the light. "No more red light!"
The car began to pull towards the doors to the next scene.
The one thug yelled, "Boss... BOSS! Get back here, ya rat!"
River looked back with a smirk and said, "Sorry boys, I'm makin' my getaway! Give my regards to the warden, suckers..." The doors to the next scene pulled open, and the car pulled through it. The Doctor and the two other Ponds were all staring at River as she lounged against the one railing on the car. She caught them looking, and said to the Doctor, "What're ya lookin' at?"
The Doctor sputtered back softly, "River... what... how...?" but she cut him off as she addressed everyone in the car.
"Everybody mind your p's and q's, and maybe nobody'll get hoit..."
The car pulled into a western town set, and River leaned over to whisper to the Doctor as a recorded announcer said something about Westerns and John Wayne
"...I didn't drop the diary." was the first thing she said.
"We kind of figured that out... So what are you doing?!"
Before River got a chance to answer, the car slowed down between a bank and another building in the sets. An animatronic sheriff yelled across at a bank robber animatronic, "There he is! It's the bank robber! Don't let him get away!" and another shoot out started.
River jumped up and pressed a button on the ride consol while yelling to everyone in the cars, "Dis is nuts, and nuts ta dis! I'm gettin' outta here..." As she hit the button, the car started moving at normal speed again (which really wasn't much faster). Her back was to the scene opening behind her, as she said, "Well, look at it this way: Things can't get any worse..." Then she turned around. "...Okay... it's worse." She looked down at the Doctor with what she hoped was a meaningful enough look for him to be on his guard.
The car had pulled into what looked like a decrepit spaceship, and the recorded announcer said, "This is "Alien". You are with Sigourney Weaver aboard the spaceship Nostromo. Something has gone wrong. One by one, the crew has vanished, and somewhere in the ship, a terrifying creature waits to claim its next victim..."
The Doctor jumped a bit when the announcer said "alien", and he looked back at River, who nodded slightly before yelling to the announcer, "Hey, I ain't no victim..."
As the car pulled farther into the scene, a red warning light and siren began to flash and blare. The announcer came back on and said, "Warning! Remain in your vehicle. The area you are entering is extremely dangerous. Proceed with caution." The car continued to progress until it was next to a corridor where an animatronic of Sigourney Weaver stood with a large blaster gun, looking nervously around the corridors. Then, the vehicle slowed considerably to a crawl.
River reached for her gun, and the Doctor took his sonic out of his pocket. Amy and Rory were looking around for any sign of the Trancitluzion, and Amy leaned over and whispered, "Doctor, is this supposed to be the same alien as yesterday, or a different one?"
The Doctor shook his head as he scanned the corridor with the animatronic. "No, this is a different alien... An equally hostile one... actually even more so than yesterdays, actually. However... I don't know if this one is just going to be an animatronic or something much, much worse."
Just then, the voice of the spaceship's computer system said, "Danger. The emergency destruct system is now activated. The ship will detonate in 10 minutes. The option to override the system will expire in T-Minus 5 minutes." Steam began to pour through a broken pipe in the ceiling, making it hard for anyone in the cars to see anything. Suddenly, something started to drip onto the car...
Amy looked at the drop of liquid on her hand and touched it. It was slightly sticky and slimy. She looked around. "Doctor..."
Rory was looking to the right of the car and spotted something. "Uh, Doctor, I'm pretty sure you should look at this..."
But just then, something shot out of the ceiling through the steam. It looked like tentacles, and apparently, felt like them too, because one of them grabbed the Doctor by the neck. Everyone in the car screamed. Suddenly, the head of the Alien came through the steam, hissing and about to bite the Doctor with its protruding second mouth. It didn't get a chance to though; River shot it three times through the head, causing it to spark and fall lifeless. It was still just an animatronic, albeit a possessed one. The Doctor gasped as the tentacle thing unwound from around his throat and then waved the sonic at the ceiling, causing a sliding hatch to close over the now motionless animatronic.
Everyone breathed easy for a moment, but the relief was short lived because another animatronic Alien was emerging from the wall on their right hand side. It was this animatronic that Rory had spotted while it was lifeless only seconds earlier.
It pulled its hands (they were hands, not tentacles as everyone could now see) from under some wires, causing them to spark profusely and pop, and it leaned towards the car about to strike again when it caught sight of River pointing two more guns at it.
The Doctor looked over at River for a split second and yelled, "Where do you keep getting those things?!"
The Alien was hissing, and after a moment, it began to speak in a voice that sounded like a continuous hiss/scream.
"It's still coming for you, you know..."
"What, the Trancitluzion? It's locked up in the highest security prison it could be in. If you're in this with him, why don't you try to kill us now?" the Doctor replied.
"I am merely a projection... a messenger."
"And that's why River was able to shoot out the first one with just a normal gun? Because you're just an animatronic... an animatronic with the projection of the actual Trancitluzion... And you can use this form because it is close to your own, and the people who come through here are afraid. You can feed of that fear to strengthen the connection. Clever."
The Alien just hissed in response and turned back to River, who was still pointing both guns at its head. "And the strong one is being weakened too... perhaps she will be worth devouring after all..."
The Doctor shook his head in confusion. "But what makes all of us worth eating and not her? ...I mean, besides the fact that she would probably kill you first."
"She did not believe anything here. No emotion could get through to feed off of... but there is more there now. It is not fear yet... but it will be, along with other weaknesses."
River couldn't stand the way the creature was talking about her. It sounded like it knew things she did not, and she did not welcome that. A lifetime of brainwashing by the Silence had made her possessive of her own thoughts, knowledge, and life after she had finally freed herself of them. But this creature presumed to stand there and act like it knew more about her. She couldn't take it, and she certainly could not take being called weak. She fired both guns at once through the animatronic, causing it to spark and die. She spun around and hit the emergency button on the console. The car lurched forward, and moved quickly into the next scene. After a moment she regained some of her composure and managed to go back to the scripted lines she was supposed to be following. "All right, I think that's enough creepy crawly things for one day right?"
The car pulled through a scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark and then through into another scene from the same movie. There was a large statue with a red jewel at the top of some stairs to the right of the ride car. River looked up at it, and looked over at the Doctor and the Ponds to mouth, "I'll be back. Wait for me at the exit of the ride" before going back to the script. "Wow! Get a load o' dat chunk of ice! Time for me to get back to woik. Don't none of yas move while I get the goods. I don't think they'd notice a few extra bodies around here, if ya know what I mean..."
She climbed up the stairs while the Ride Announcer voice talked about the jewel and the temple. She was about to reach for the jewel, when a figure to the left of the statue, clothed in veils, put up a hand and said, "Halt, unbeliever! Disturb the treasure of the gods, and you shall all pay with your lives."
River gave the Temple Guardian a disdainful look and reached out to the jewel. She was quickly obscured by smoke, and when it cleared, all that was left was a skeleton. The Doctor gasped and went to jump out of the vehicle and run up to the skeleton, but Amy grabbed his arm and said, "It's part of the ride. That's supposed to happen; River is all right, Doctor. That's not her."
He sat back down and put his head in his hands for a moment. He could hear everyone else in the car cheering because apparently the Temple Guardian was their original guide, but all he could think of was the skeleton and River.
It was like she'd been eaten by Vashda Nerada... and of course he thought of the library. Unfortunately, that thought was never far from his mind, but he had forgotten everything for a moment there and believed that Vashda Nerada had actually gotten River. You need to keep it together, Old Man... you stupid, stupid, old man... he thought to himself.
He quickly cleared his thoughts though, and looked up to see they were quickly passing through the rest of the movies.
The guide was saying, "I'm sorry, folks, I understand that you had quite a scare back in the "Alien" scene, so we're just gonna cruise through the rest of these movies and get you back to the set. We are terribly sorry about that... " He continued to talk, but the Doctor and the Ponds weren't listening. They were all lost in their own thoughts.
The Doctor looked at Amy and Rory and said, "We start to get to the bottom of this. Now. We find River when we get off of this ride, and then we find out for sure what that thing wants with her and the rest of us, and then..." he trailed off and had a dark, almost scary look on his face.
Both of the Ponds nodded, and they sat as the ride moved towards where they had loaded and where they would exit.
Credit and thanks to where I found the script to the Great Movie Ride.