warnings: profanity; allusions to earlier indiscretions

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4. Standing Up

Oh, man! Yusei thought.

Jack had been a complete no-show at breakfast that morning and he was beginning to fret that he'd driven his friend into total panic mode. After all, Jack wasn't that good at committing to people in the first place, right, and here they … well …

And right before his and Carly's wedding! Every time he thought about Carly, Yusei felt a deep pit of guilt open up underneath his feet. If he dreaded facing Jack, that went many times over for Carly. He didn't think he could meet her eyes. How could he look at her without her knowing exactly what happened?

Every time Crow glanced at him Yusei felt his gaze evading contact and a strange expression entering Crow's eyes. Crow seemed reluctant to say anything, but Yusei was sure that it was only a matter of time before curiosity got the better of him.

By the time they started getting ready for the wedding, Yusei was a wreck. He paced madly in the anteroom of the rooms provided as dressing rooms for the groomsmen. He was already clad in his tux, dressed to the nines.

"Dammit, Yusei, calm down. You're not getting married today," Crow said irritably.

Yusei's heart jumped a little at the words. He tried to ignore it. "Where is he?" he muttered. "What's up with him? If he doesn't want to talk—"

"What?"

—to me, he should at least talk to Carly.

"Nothing."

"Wait. Is there something going on with him that I should know about?" asked Crow. "Is he going to screw up this wedding?!"

"Crow …"

"Now, wait a minute. You can't always make excuses for that guy when he makes the big mistakes."

"Crow, you wait a minute. What if the mistake was mine? Or, at least, partly mine?"

"What the hell are you talking about? This is his and Carly's wedding, right? What does it have to do with you—other than the fact that you're best man?"

"Best man …" Yusei slumped into a chair. "Crow, I'm anything but that. I might be the reason why he's not here. You just don't understand."

"Why don't you clue me in, then?"

"I … oh, Crow! After we left the bachelor party—you know how that went! Why did you have to be that way? Baiting him like that? He was so out of sorts, I wanted to smooth it over, make him feel better. I wanted him to know how important he is to us. Honestly, Crow, the way you nitpick sometimes—"

"Yusei, you're babbling, could you get to the point?"

"Yeah, right, we sorta … actually … I wanted to talk to him and lighten his mood a little and after, well, I sort of blacked out."

Crow laughed. "Well, we all know you're kind of a lightweight, Yusei!"

"Yeah, well, it's no laughing matter, so wipe that smile off your face."

"What are you talking about? Will you ever get to the point?"

"This morning, I woke up and there Jack was."

"So? So what?"

"Naked."

"Eh … that's … eh … not so good."

"Me too."

"You!"

"Me. Too."

Crow cringed. "I don't get it. What are you talking about, you, too? Why would you both … Well, you were both drunk, so … there's that—"

"There was a lot more than that, but I don't really want to get into the details. I think I might have started it."

"It?" Crow cringed again, visibly. "As in … it?! Oh, come on, Yusei! You don't mean to tell me you're really interested in doing it w—with Jack—a-are you?! It? Not … it!"

"Yes. It, as you so delicately put it. For a long time. I love him, Crow. I mean, really love him. You know what he's like."

"Yeah. I do. That's why I can't see it. You two? Really?" He stared at Yusei for a long moment, as though assessing. "Oh, my God! You two … Really! Shit. Every time he crashed, or … Damn. Yusei." Crow collapsed into the chair next to Yusei. "What are you going to do? What do we say to Carly?"

The two stared at each other for a long moment, wondering what to do.

"Where's Jack?"

Their heads simultaneously snapped around toward the door. Yusei was amazed that neither of them suffered whiplash. He was positive they both looked like kids caught with their hands in the cookie jar.

Misty had a distinctly suspicious expression on her beautiful face.

"J-Jack?" Crow said.

"Yes, Jack. What other friend of yours is getting married today?"

"Right, right. I think he stepped out for a breath of air. You know how grooms are."

"Yeah, they can't be trusted." Misty eyed them both with a low flare of anger. "I want to know the moment he gets back."

She floated out in her flowing, light blue silk maid of honor gown.

"Man," said Crow. "I don't think she's lost much terror potential since she retired from Dark Signer-hood."

"I hear you," said Yusei.

"So do you think Jack's going to even show, or do—"

Crow didn't even finish his question, let alone receive an answer when the door opened, revealing Jack, exquisitely dressed in white tailcoat with tails down to his calves. Its lavender silk lining displayed discretely and he wore a white and lavender orchid boutonniere.

Yusei had to admit the ensemble suited him well. Almost too well. He craved the sensation of running his fingers along those lapels.

For a start.

Yusei didn't know what it was. He didn't remember a thing about what had happened between them, but Jack—who had always been very attractive to Yusei—now seemed about ten times as attractive as he ever had been. His suit didn't help at all. Was it just knowing that they had done those things together, or was there a subconscious memory of it that he couldn't access? At any rate, Yusei wanted nothing more than to touch Jack.

But Jack's expression was grim.

Yusei desperately tried to catch his eyes, but it seemed as though Jack couldn't even stand to look at him. He steadfastly avoided looking at Yusei directly.

Yusei's heart sank.

Without so much as glancing in his direction, Jack said, "Yusei, a moment, please," and stepped into the groom's dressing room without further comment.

Yusei shrugged, shot Crow a look, and followed.

"Jack," he said, "what do you need? If—"

"Yusei, all I want to know is, did I—" Jack paused here, a look of sheer anguish crossing his face. Yusei wondered what could possibly be wrong. Did he regret what he did so very much? Did he hate the idea of doing it? Finally, Jack gathered himself and continued. "Did I … hurt you?"

"Did you—No! God, no." Yusei stifled a laugh. That was the last thing he'd expected to hear. "No … no wonder. No wonder you didn't show. I … I thought—"

I thought you hated it. You hated me.

Yusei watched in amazement as Jack slumped against a table as relief surged through his body. He staggered and eased into a chair. "Thank God. I couldn't remember a thing."

"From the stag party?"

"From afterward."

"Me neither, Jack." He stepped over to Jack and laid a hand on Jack's white-gloved one. "But, Jack, it's … well, it was bad timing, but—Jack—it's something I've wanted—for a long time. I only regret the circumstances. I shouldn't have done it then … when you've made promises. It was wrong of me. I'm really sorry, Jack."

"You don't know that it was you who initiated it."

"Who else? I mean, I'm the one who always wanted—"

"Yusei. You don't know it was you who started things."

"I … Oh."

The meaning hit Yusei like a freight train. Could he just reach over and pull Jack forward by that lovely lapel now and kiss him? Oh how he wanted to find out! He tried to meet Jack's eyes, but they evaded his. "So what do we do?"

"We? I get married."

"Jack, are you sure that's wise? I mean, after this? Shouldn't you talk to Carly about it at least?"

"She's the superstitious type. If I talk to her—"

"The wedding's off? But wouldn't that be …"

… for the best if it isn't going to work out?

Yusei wanted to say it, but he couldn't. It sounded … well, it sounded too much like what he wished for but was afraid to ask. It sounded so selfish. It sounded like he wanted his happiness at the expense of Carly's pain.

"Well," he said, "I promised Misty I'd tell her that you're back."

"Back?"

"We sort of told a white lie that you'd stepped out when she stopped by earlier."

"I see."

Yusei opened his mouth to say more, but had no idea what to say, so he simply got up and walked to the door. He paused there, looking back at Jack for a moment. Jack was still sitting, uncharacteristically slumped, in the chair, long legs stretched and slack, a hand supporting his forehead. He didn't look up.

Yusei's heart sank as he turned and headed through the waiting area and down the hall to the women's dressing room.

As they walked down the aisle, Jack's pale skin became even paler. By the time they had arrived in front of the officiant, his skin looked as white as alabaster, and his face looked as though it was carved out of that very substance, it was so set.

Yusei was beginning to be seriously worried that Jack was going to pass out. He wanted to reach out and hold his hand, but that would be wrong, seriously inappropriate for the occasion.

They turned and looked toward the door. Yusei glanced toward Jack. He had thought that all color had drained from his face, but decided that he was wrong because Jack seemed to become, if anything, even paler when Carly appeared.

There she was, decked out in a wedding gown that resembled wedding cake with spaghetti straps, one of which slid off her shoulder as she walked down the aisle. Yusei felt Jack shift beside him at that … it was so Carly.

Yusei couldn't tell whether he wanted to sigh at the perfection of it all or scream in anguish. He caught the corner of his tongue between his teeth and held it, desperately keeping silent. He wouldn't be the one to ruin his best friend's wedding day, no matter what!

He couldn't know for certain that this wasn't the best thing for Jack. And it was Jack's decision, not his.

And Jack always knows what he wants. Right?

Carly had reached the front and now stood beside Jack, looking positively radiant.

Yusei was dimly aware of Mikage in the front row between Jaeger and a smoldering Ushio, sobbing quietly but uncontrollably into her handkerchief. He felt tears all too near his own eyes and hoped that he could pass it off as some sort of stupid sentimentality if need be. Crow was at the end of the front row looking tense.

The ceremony went on forever.

Yusei could not pay attention as the officiant droned on and on. He wanted to look at Jack, but didn't dare. He couldn't bear to look at Carly. As much as he wanted to, it wasn't appropriate to bury his face in his hands.

Wasn't this supposed to be a happy occasion?

At last a question was asked, and Yusei pricked up his ears. He forced his head up only to see Jack's back. Of course, he had turned to face Carly.

"… all the days of your life?"

Carly looked deeply into Jack's eyes and said, "I will."

A roaring began to fill Yusei's ears as the same question was posed to Jack. Yusei began to wonder, forget Jack, would he make it through without keeling over? He'd thought he could do this, but the thought of Jack walking out of here with Carly cheerily clinging to his arm was enough to kill him.

"… of your life?"

Yusei stared at Jack's back. In this moment, all doubt, whatever remaining threads of hope that remained in Yusei's heart, would be resolved. The broad chest expanded as Jack took a deep breath, causing Yusei's heart to throb painfully.

Jack began to speak slowly and huskily, "I …"

Author's notes ...

Reviews: It bears repeating, thanks ever so much for reviewing! I can't tell you how motivating it is. :) I'm glad that I could get a few chuckles for the last chapter. I was hoping for that! I chuckled a couple of times while writing it, if I do say so myself. ;) Hope I didn't let you all down with the followup!

The ceremony is taken from a justice of the peace ceremony on purpose. I know nothing about traditional Japanese weddings and won't embarrass everyone (especially me!) by attempting to portray one - and I don't really want to impose a religion on these characters since one hasn't really been associated with them.

Note for those reading Where There's Fire: I want to work on the next chapter a little, it might be delayed a bit more. Sorry about that!

To be continued ...!