Chapter 27

His words were like arrows piercing my heart.

"That is….it is not possible! I cannot be pregnant for I would have had to…."

"It was very obvious why you and Thorin snuck off those nights. Do you think us daft?" Bofur asked.

"No one can say a word to Thorin! Or Fili and Kili! They would not be able to keep such a secret." I said.

"Tawariell?!"

"I know you may think it wrong and selfish, but I need to think about all this. And think of how I shall ever be able to tell Thorin." I said.

They all stopped and thought of this. It seemed I had been keeping many things from Thorin lately. And I hated it and I hated myself for it.

"I promise I shall tell him. Just give me some time." I said.

They nodded and I walked off a little.

You are a fool Tawariell! Look what you have done!

I covered my face with my hands and held back tears.

"Miss Tawariell?"

Bilbo came up behind me. I turned and looked upon him.

"Oh Bilbo what I am to do? What shall Thorin say?!"

"Come now and sit. There we go. Now calm down and tell me what it is that is scaring you so." He said.

I had grown to love that little hobbit. He was always able to comfort me. I told him of my dreams and what I had to do. Bilbo stared at me with concern and admiration.

"To willingly die for him…..you are a brave woman. Yet now with your child can you still carry it out?"

"No I cannot. And yet if I do not I will lose Thorin." I cried.

"Now, now do not fret! I am sure there is another way. We shall figure this all out, but I do not think you should keep this from Thorin any longer. Perhaps together…..you shall find an answer that benefit's the three of you. And when I say three I do also mean your unborn child." said the hobbit.

I nodded and then Bilbo offered to send Thorin to me, but I shook my head.

"No….this is something I must do." I said.

He nodded and together we walked back to the camp. The others had returned and I took a deep breath.

"You can do this Miss Tawariell. Go on." Bilbo said.

I walked forward and Thorin smiled at me.

"Thorin there is something I must tell you." I said.

He nodded and we walked away. I sat down and he stood before me.

"Are you alright Tawariell?"

"I need you to listen carefully to what I am about to tell you and not speak until I have finished."

He nodded and I took a deep breath.

"These past nights…..have been the best in my life. I will never have enough. But there is something about my dreams you do not know. It is always Azog that kills you…but this time…I got in his way. I died in your place and willingly I did so."

I looked up and his expression was one of unquestionable anger.

"Was this your plan all along? To die in my stead?" he asked.

"I am so sorry! Thorin I know I should have told you but…"

"But nothing Tawariell! Did you not give a thought to my feelings!? Have I not said you mean everything to me?! That without you my life is nothing!"

"I know….I know and I am so sorry."

"An apology will not suffice Tawariell!" he snapped.

Tears welled in my eyes and I knew that if I did not tell him now, I would lose him.

"I can no longer do what I planned." I said.

He turned and looked at me. He remained silent and I looked at Bilbo. He and the others had gathered near us. He nodded and I nodded, then I looked at Thorin.

"I am carrying your child Thorin." I whispered.

His expression was unreadable. He slowly sat down beside me.

"Thorin?"

He looked at me and opened his mouth to speak but nothing came. He closed his mouth. He continued to look at me and tears welled in my eyes. I looked away and held my face in my hands.

"I am so sorry Thorin! I should never have let this happen! I should have been careful and I….I…."

"Shhh-hhh! Tawariell look at me." he said softly.

I could not. He gently took my hands in his and then turned my face towards his. He wiped my tears away and stroked my hand with his thumb.

"This was bound to happen. This is not your fault. We both knew what could happen. We made love, there is nothing wrong with that. We both took actions that caused this. Yet I do not regret any of it."

"Nothing?" I asked.

He smiled and kissed me softly. He pulled back slightly and placed his hand over my stomach.

"Nothing at all. And I know you feel the same." He murmured.

I covered his hand with mine.

"Tawariell of the Dúnedain, daughter of Eruantien….will you do me the honor of becoming my bride?" he asked.

I pulled back and looked into his eyes. I smiled and covered my mouth with my hand.

"Yes Thorin…Yes I will." I said.

He smiled and moved my hand. He leaned forward and I kissed him. When we separated lightly touched his face. He closed his eyes and I trailed my fingers to his lips. They lingered there and then trailed down to his chest. There I rested my hand over his heart. He covered my hand.

"I hope this child will be as beautiful as its mother…." he pulled back.

I opened my eyes and he touched my face.

"Same beautiful green eyes, fairer then any emerald…" his fingers touched my lips, "your perfect lips. Softer then any wool." His hand cupped my faced. "the same kind and gentle face, where beauty is unmatched." He said.

I smiled and he embraced me. I wound my arms around him and closed my eyes. When I pulled away he smiled and loosed my hair from its braid. It fell down around me and I smiled. I looked over at the others. I assumed Bilbo, Bofur, Bombur, Dori and Ori had not told the others. I looked back at Thorin.

"Perhaps we should not tell them…..not just yet. It is only Bilbo, Bofur, Bombur, Dori and Ori who know." I said.

He agreed and then we walked back. That night I dreamed a different dream entirely. I saw a young girl running through the halls of what I guessed to be Erebor. She was being chased by Kili. She was laughing and smiling. Her hair was long and dark. Yet her eyes were what caught me. One was a beautiful blue and the other a shining green. Kili caught her and picked her up.

"Who now is faster! O mighty daughter of Thorin, King under the Mountain?" Kili asked.

"You uncle!" she said.

I woke up slowly and smiled.