Namesake

by Angel Descendant

Senior year marks the return of Tsuna and gang from Italy, turning Kyoko's world upside down. Triangles are formed, loyalties are tested, and friendships are torn apart. Change can bring out the best and the worst in people, she'll later realize as she plunges into the world of love, rivalry, and Dying Will Bullets. To ZiaLiaLis. 6YL-canon time. K/59/86 POV. K27/5986. Complete.

15. Author's Note

I. Am. So. Friggin ashamed.

You will know what comes next. I'm going to be temporarily not be in FFn for awhile, and I mean awhile (I asked a friend to makes sure she changes the password. That's how much I can't let this go). Reason one is because life is getting to me. I'm currently suffocating from my clubwork right now. I was okay since time was still on my side for the past weeks, but finally life has caught up to me. My obsession with fanfiction caused my grades to suffer. My procrastination in the things we'd be holding is now handing me the consequences. Being a Club President is never easy.

Then, there are the blows I received as a writer. All my life, I've been given good expectations and know what? This year, those expectations are now bringing me down. My handwriting often causes my downfall, and I'm just too carefree to realize that life is giving me shit to worry about.

Then I posted a rushed chapter again, but that chapter is the final straw. I just... I just can't keep my effing promises. I often fail. I-I'm sorry to those who I promised I'll be able to finish this fic this December. In truth, I want to finish it right now. BUT. I just don't have the time.

Then there are the never-ending bouts of depression I often have. I am such a weak parasite, since I don't know how to dump the things I'm feeling right now. That's why most of my fics are so uninspired. I am mad at myself because the story is going downhill. I want this story to be over four chapters max. You guys are my strength but... dammit I don't deserve it. I can't write anymore.

I am so, so sorry. You hoped for a finished chapter probably, and now I'm telling you that I'll be quitting because it's not good enough to satisfy you.

No. It's not because I want to get your pity or anything. It's just because I need to cry right now. I am so stressed with what life's dumping on me, and I hate myself because I am so weak.

I'm sorry too for those who deleted this from their alerts. It's just... I just don't know what to do right now. It's going downhill. Is it because of the drama? Is it because of the unnecessary dialogue? The slow pacing? The lack of fluff?

Nah, just forget it. I apologize because I'm such a bad author. I start something, and just when the obstacles finally come I'm afraid of finishing it.