Chapter 19: A River, A Stone, and A Willow

Emma looked up and smiled as Ruby placed a cup of cocoa on the counter in front of her the next morning. She hadn't even ordered it yet.

"You look like you could use it," said Ruby.

"Thanks," replied Emma.

"Long day all ready?"

"More like a long few days."

"Since Henry's dad came back," Ruby asked sympathetically. Emma stayed silent. "I'm sorry that must suck for you."

"Just exactly how much did Mary Margaret tell you?"

"Not much really but we come from a world where love is different than it is here so it's easy to recognize."

"I am not," Emma said raising her voice and then lowered it, "I am not in love with Neal."

Ruby just chuckled. "Yeah keep telling yourself that," she said as she went to go excuse herself to take care of other customers.

Emma just sighed. She supposed she couldn't be mad at Ruby. Just like Mary Margaret she was concerned about her. Though Emma considered Ruby a friend in other ways she was more like an aunt of sorts. Mary Margaret didn't have any siblings but Ruby was the closest thing she had to a sister.

"Are you sure I can't get you anything else," Emma over heard Ruby ask a customer.

"Water is more than enough, thanks," said the customer.

Emma turned to her left having recognized the voice. She smiled at River and walked over to her.

"So are you stalking me now or something," Emma said to her.

River looked up from the book she was reading and smiled. "I swear I didn't even know you lived here." River motioned to the seat in front of her. "Please sit," she said.

"Thanks," Emma said doing so. "Really because it sure seemed like you knew a lot about me yesterday."

"Not directly. I just see things."

"So what brings you to Storybrooke?"

"Is that Emma Swan asking or the sheriff?" River asked motioning to the badge on Emma's belt.

"Whoever will get you to answer the question," Emma replied.

"I'm looking for something."

"Which is what?"

"Guess I'll know it when I find it."

"What's with the cryptic answers?"

"You're not fond of that are you? You like people to be direct. When they're not it throws you off. You a woman who needs answers, you struggle to go on faith alone and yet its faith and believing in something more than yourself that makes you who you are but sometimes you fail to see that because you still want to believe in the reality you grew up in."

Emma stayed silent for a moment.

"How do you know that," she finally asked.

"I'm quite observant."

"Do you plan to stay here long?"

"You ask a lot of questions."

"I'm the sheriff, it's my job."

River nodded. "Fair enough," she said. "I guess it all depends on me finding what I came here for and what I came to do."

Standing up, River placed a few dollar bills on the table.

"You coming sheriff," River asked as she made her way out of the diner.

Emma followed her. River stood on the sidewalk, stopping, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. The air was clean, a hint of salt. There were clouds but it didn't seem like it would rain, it would just be an overcast kind of day.

"A perfect day," said River.

"For what?"

River smiled, "Hiking."

The two of them walked down the street where a navy blue explorer was parallel parked. River pulled out her keys and unlocked it.

"I don't know why I'm doing this," Emma said as she got in the car.

"I can think of several reasons," River replied.

"Are you going to share them?"

"You sure you want to hear them?"

"If they're the only answers you can give me I'll take what I can get."

"Okay one is your naturally curious. You're a seeker always have been and you usually can't rest until you find what it is your looking for. In this case, I'm the mysterious one so you need answers to that even though our lives have only crossed once before this. And the second is that you're trying to run from something. Getting in a car with a complete stranger is your way of not having to deal with whatever problems that had you run to that tree yesterday in the first place."

Emma looked out the window and whispered, "You're two for two."

River parked her explorer in a round parking lot pullout. In front of them was a bulletin board which had not been used in years. The two of them got out of the vehicle and Emma inspected the area.

"I didn't even know there was a camping area around here."

River opened the backseat and pulled out her day pack and a walking stick. "You'd be surprised at how many secrets this place holds but then you should probably know that more than most." Emma looked at River but said nothing. "Well am I right," River asked.

Emma said nothing which gave River her answer.

"You have your phone right," River asked.

"Yeah why?"

"Turn it off you won't need it out here."

"But I'm the sheriff, they might need me."

"Maybe but if you were really on the job you wouldn't be out here with me. You're out here for your own personal reasons same as me."

Emma looked at River and smiled half-heartedly as she reached into her pocket and turned off the phone. She pressed the button she needed.

"There, happy. What about yours?"

River smiled, "I leave mine in the car," she said as she began walking toward one of the trail heads. "Usually where I go there's rarely cell reception. No point in using something that won't work in the woods. And where we're going it's always best not to be disturbed by outside distractions."

"And you do this often?" Emma asked as the two made their way into the woods.

River smiled. "My dad used to take me camping a lot when I was a kid. It was always our thing. One of the rules he had was no technology on camping trips. He said it defeated the purpose of being outdoors. When he died the camping continued and so did the rule."

"What about your mom?"

"She was never in the picture, well not really. She was only sixteen when she had me, my dad was eighteen. She was with us for a year before she couldn't take it and left."

"I understand completely. Being a teenager with a kid isn't easy." River looked at Emma and waited for her to continue. "I was eighteen."

"But you gave up your son." River shrugged as Emma looked at her. "It's a small town."

"It's more than that," said Emma. "You're very intuitive about people aren't you?"

The two of them continued to get deeper in the woods. "I'm intuitive about the land. People are just a part of it."

River and Emma continued their walk in silence for a few miles until they reached a small outcrop that separated some of the woods. There were a few downed trees. And River stopped, pulling a couple bottles of water from her pack and some thin slabs of beef jerky. She handed a bottle and a slab to Emma.

They took a seat on a couple of the logs.

"I don't think I've ever been this far in," Emma said.

"This place is bigger than we think," River answered. "It's the never ending forest but if you know your way, there's always an out."

"For being a drifter you seem to know a lot about my town."

"It's just the connection I have to it."

"Which is what exactly?"

River smiled, "Magic," she said simply.

Emma gasped. Who was this girl? Who was River Stone? Intuitive to be sure but there was more to her than that.

River picked up her walking stick.

"Come on," she said to Emma. "We're not far, just about another mile."

"I thought you said you didn't know what you were looking for, so how do you know how far we need to go?"

"I can sense it. Take a moment Emma, look at where we are, listen."

They remained silent for a moment and River closed her eyes.

"I don't hear anything," said Emma.

"Exactly," replied River. "There's nothing to hear and yet there's everything: Birds whisking in the trees to the north, the sound of a water droplet falling from a leaf and hitting a blade of grass near a small stream to the north east. Everything is synchronized to each other but instead of clutter there is a sense of order.

Sometimes in order to un-clutter our minds we need to listen, to see her world so she can help us with our own. It's nice to turn to other people for help and it's great if you have a support system like that but it's also good to remove yourself from the world and be a part of the one that was here long before people and has survived many changes in its own life. If anyone knows about survival it's the earth."

Emma watched this young girl. She seemed so wise beyond her years and maybe she was. Emma had known from personal experience that age didn't make you who you are but rather life experience. Some people got theirs from life in general, others from religion, or others like River herself from the very ground she walked on.

In her time as a nomad, moving from place to place, Emma had come across a few people like River, people who saw the world on a natural level rather than a humanistic one. She had always thought people like that were a bit eccentric since it was a world she didn't understand.

Seeing River though, she was not eccentric at all. She had people skills, to an extent, but like herself Emma could see that she preferred to be alone. The woods were a real home to her and from what she could gather, society seemed like a temporary home, though she lived in it she never felt part of it. Emma could relate to that. Society was River's foster home.

They silently continued on their hike.

About a mile later River and Emma arrived to a small clearing. About twenty yards ahead of them was a small river flowing and near it was a willow tree, the only tree in the vicinity if you didn't count the trees of the forest surrounding them.

The branches and leaves swayed from the mild wind.

"Beautiful isn't it?" River asked.

"This is what you were looking for, a tree?"

River placed her walking stick and her pack on the ground near her feet as she walked to the tree.

"It's not just any tree," River said. Emma followed her and the two of them stood under the branches.

River gently caressed the bark. "It's the only willow in this forest. I've seen a lot of them over the years but like your tree, this one is special to me."

"You're her aren't you?" Emma asked.

River smiled, "I knew you'd figure it out."

"How is that even possible? Pocahontas was a historical figure, a historical figure from this world."

"True but how is it possible for a tree to be blasted from the inside? Science has its answers I would think but we don't come from a land of science do we? Pocahontas may have been a historical figure in this world but what of the whispering willow? The Disney version showed her conversing with a talking tree that looked like an old woman. That was their way of not making it complicated for kids. In reality she was simply talking to the spirits, talking to the land and all that's part of it, looking for answers, looking within herself.

Spirits transcend realms Emma. Some people die, cease to exist, become ghosts. Others such as me simply exist. No life, no death, just existing but still just as real."

"And that part about your parents?"

"All true, in this world. It can get pretty technical."

"Do you ever get tired of it? I mean if you exist without life and death, don't you ever want to just… I don't know, move on?"

"To what, some form of afterlife? What afterlife is there for a spirit that's omnipresent? I go between worlds, between realms, parallel dimensions. You get the idea."

"Yeah I guess," said Emma.

"I was in the Enchanted Forest at the time of the curse. There I really was a talking willow tree so those legends here are true," River said with a smirk. "It's how I knew who you were. There had been whispers of a savior who would return in twenty eight years and me being what I am, I knew that savior was you."

"So that's how you came to Storybrooke, you're part of the town, part of the curse."

"In a way yes but because I'm a spirit I'm not trapped here the way others are. Enough about me though Emma, how can I help you?"

"What makes you think I need help?"

"You've retreated to the woods twice."

"I know the running thing," said Emma. "I know I need to stop."

"Not necessarily. I don't consider it running. I consider it taking a break, taking a moment to put things into perspective."

"You're the first person to say that."

River shrugged, "Well I'm a drifter by nature but even humans need to do that every once in a while."

"Thanks."

"You have this look in your eye Emma, like you're conflicted. There's something you want but something you're afraid to go after."

"You can see all that?"

"I've spent eons around people of all worlds. The look of pain is always the same. You carry a weight of pain but also one of love, a love you're afraid to embrace."

River reached out her hand to Emma, "Come, there's something I want to show you."

Emma hesitantly looked at River's outstretched hand but reluctantly took it.

They walked several yards to the left along the river. River knelt down.

"Tell me what you see."

Emma looked into the water. "Stones, algae, water. What's your point?"

"There's stillness here," said River. "Everything is clear."

She then reached into the water and ripples moved as she picked up a stone and gently skipped it sideways in the river. It landed feet away downstream where it settled on top of more rocks.

"Chaos ensues but only for a moment."

"It becomes steady again," said Emma.

"Exactly," River said with a smile. "I know you're confused about a lot Emma, about love especially but you all ready know what it is you want."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Same reason I'm sure about this river. Life may throw things at it, it may dry up, it may break and change form but it still remains the same as it was. It doesn't cease being a river just because of chaotic forces. Love is the same way."

Emma stood up and walked back toward the willow tree taking a seat and leaning against it.

"It's not as easy as it seems."

"I never said it was easy," River said walking over and sitting next to her. "Out of all the worlds I've been in, love has never been harder than it is in this one but love is still that. You love this man don't you?"

"I used to but so much time has passed," said Emma.

"Time shouldn't matter. Just look at your parents." Emma looked at River wondering where she was leading with this. "They were separated for twenty eight years. Did time matter for them?"

"I guess you have a point but it's different for them."

"How so?"

"I grew up here. I didn't grow up in a world where true love meant happily ever after."

"That's where you're wrong Emma. You may not have grown up in a world that gets their happily ever after the way other world's do but you stem from that world. You carry the magic within you. You brought back the happy endings for others so I know you can do the same for yourself. It's a balance.

You've always known in your heart what you really want. You've got that chance now. This is the part when I'm gonna tell you to stop running. Stop running and just listen to what's inside. Don't be afraid of it, embrace it. True love doesn't happen often and it doesn't happen to everybody. When that switch gets turned on it can never be turned off."

"You really believe that?"

"I do but it shouldn't matter what I believe. You're the daughter of true love so you tell me."

Emma looked at River for a moment and then focused her eyes on the river that they had just been at.

The two were content to sit for a while in silence with their thought.