A/N: I'm back kittens. Sorry for the wait. I have been resting and taking my time. I finally gathered the strength to write a chapter. I have these moments where writing is all I want to do and then there are the moments where I drag my feet and feel like my writing is crap. Also, this story will be loosely based on personal events to keep the realism so I hope no one gets offended. Hope this will be well worth the wait. Also, remember I said I had a surprise for my two loyal reviewers: Hanna Cabrodi and Nep2unne, well I did not forget and here it is. Also, I have a surprise for my two new loyal reviewers: MorganTaylorM3 and BlackRobb88. Enjoy my twisted dark fantasies! Happy Reading!

Phoebe

"Good Morning; my name is Heyerdahl, Phoebe and I am a third year at The University of Tokyo." I pressed a fake smile, showing teeth as I gritted them slightly. I sighed. "To my left is our second year ambassador; also from University of Tokyo, Cabrodi, Hanna and to my right is first year from Tskuba, Neptune."

Neptune popped her gum, shuffling with her tattered, fingerless mittens in boredom as Hanna waved frantically at the hoard of incoming first-years. It was frigid cold and I could tell the thin, yellow knockoff fleece jacket Hanna had over her petite frame was not doing much in keeping her warm against the brisk, brutal winds of mid-winter Japan. She wore giant leopard print earmuffs to keep her frostbitten ears bundled but they were the cheap kind from a low-end retail shopping center within the Harajuku district while her mittens appeared to be even less dense than her jacket. Neptune- her nickname, no one truly knows her real name though it is speculated- was quite overdressed. Donning an ankle-length, black mink coat with cashmere gloves and a pink fluffy wool hat, I was surprised she was not damn near sweating underneath all the body heat. It was only thirty-five degrees today; much better than it was just last week when the annual blizzard swept through town. It was almost forty-below as hail and snow created everything from walking hazards to imminent death traps not only for students on campus trying to get to and from classes and dormitories with ease but for residents living nearby as well.

I was too exhausted to show my usual amounts of enthusiasm and did not feel up to being student ambassador at such an ungodly hour of the morning. I barely got any sleep these past few months and with it being my last semester of my undergraduate year, I was up to my neck in not only studies, exams, homework, and papers, but also my personal, domestic duties as well. Lately, my husband and I have been having marital issues and it has caused a rift between us and our family. I began cooking his favorite dishes every night in an attempt to keep him home more often than crammed in his office or out for drinks with his colleagues. He discovered that women will flock and throw themselves at his feet if he asked when the five-figure paychecks began to emerge after his promotion and I learned that being the ideal homemaker does not always ensure a happy home. The last thing I needed was to be fully awake, well-alert, and perky at nine in the morning when I wanted nothing more than to go back home and snuggle deep within the goose-feathered down comforters my father had bought as a house warming gift for the winter months. I was not quite yet acclimated to the harsh winters of Japan.

"Welcome, first-years!" Hanna giggle, still waving. "We welcome you to your home away from home, University of Tsukuba in Tokyo. Though Phoebe and I are second and third years at a fellow institution respectively, we are a part of the new student ambassador coalition and teamed with your fellow classmate, Neptune, to welcome you to your new home."

The large, pink bubble of gum Neptune had been blowing out of boredom for the past few minutes popped. "What she said."

I shook my head, forcing another smile. "I apologize for the sudden change of weather. Winter in Tokyo, Japan can be somewhat of an unexpected monster."

A hand rose. "Is the University of Tokyo similar to Tskuba?"

"Glad you asked. See, The University of Tokyo is no exactly a sister school but through the ambassador program, students throughout the-"

"What type of dumb question is that?" Neptune interrupted; earning small stares and a fit of giggling from the crowd of 'mean girls' from the back. The three blondes that sat in the back of the group have been causing trouble and sassing anyone and everyone since they arrived about an hour ago. One of them made fun of my glasses as the other commented on my sweater that I wore underneath my ski-jacket. I fought the urge to shush them and settled for quietly ignoring them. They reminded me so much of Rhonda when she was in middle-school that I grew unfazed. "The University of Tokyo is the Harvard University of Japan. One out of every thousand students gets in per semester. You fresh fish get to go here because your American school has a partnership with the University that offers stupid majors such as Fine Arts and Creative Literature."

One of the blondes in the back raised her hand. "I'm a Fine Arts major!"

Neptune rolled her eyes, beginning to chew her wad of gum. "Explains so much."

"What my dear friend is suggesting is that although we are not affiliated in any way, students from surrounding universities join the ambassador program to help new and foreign students adjust to college life in Tokyo."

Neptune rolled her eyes, popping her gum as Hanna erratically nodded. "Exactly what Phoebe said; also, take part in some of the campus programs as well. I am part and vice chairman of my University's Christian religious group: The Sunshine"

"Sounds lame." Another pop of gum; more giggling. "No one wants to be affiliated with a group that calls themselves sunshine."

"You don't know that, Neppy." Hanna put her gloved hands on her hips, slurring her words in her thick Dominican accent as she brushed a wave of her hair away from her face. "And for your information, we love calling ourselves 'The Sunshine'."

"Yeah, don't call me 'Neppy'."

"Why do you have to be so rude sometimes?"

She shrugged, popping her gum. "Not rude, just honest." Neptune looked down, then back at Hanna. "By the way, your boots are hideous."

I grew tired of their back and forth banter and suggested we begin the campus tour walk. Hanna Cabrodi was a vivacious, exuberant, happy-go-lucky, young woman from the Dominican Republic. I met her last year during an ancient Japanese politics discussion where she was in the back of the lecture hall going berserk because she could not read or write traditional Japanese fluently. It baffled me slightly for a moment because a requirement for admission was to be fluent in the language; but I decided to ignore it and help her with vast hours of tutoring and conversation like anyone with a good conscience would. I did not expect my time that I spent with Hanna to go beyond anything more than an acquaintance/classmate relationship because we were so different in personalities. Hanna was very extrovert, full-of-energy, and a bit feisty while I was almost the opposite; quiet, shy, and introvert. She reminded me of Helga in a few instances with her somewhat bossy, dominant personality and quick spitfire persona when provoked; which is why I think I gravitated so much towards her that she and I became such close friends. It went from us meeting up for a simple one hour tutoring session to hanging out during downtime after class or catching a quick bite to eat and getting to know each other with endless hours of conversation, crying, and plenty of laughter. She came from an unconventional family setting filled with alcoholism and emotional turmoil and it made me gain a newfound respect for her. She was still such a positive, very lively person that grabbed every moment life had to offer by the horns and jerk it along for the ride of a lifetime even after all the negative, heart wrenching things that may have happened in the past. She and Helga not only shared similar personalities but also familial upbringings; making them strong, independent women that I admired and highly respected. It made me wonder if she and I were such great friends because she was so much like Helga despite the high-pitched voice and animated personality. With Helga gone, I felt so lonely for the first few months in Japan. Everyone in Japan seemed to really prefer keeping to themselves and no one truly interacted with anyone inside or outside of classes. With Hanna, I felt like I found another lifelong friend that I could see myself with for the long hauls.

Neptune was the opposite. She was somewhat introvert, quiet, and deadpanned. She had her moments where she was full of energy and life but majority of them were sarcastic, comical, and to the point. I spent very little time outside of the ambassador program with Neptune because she keeps to herself and her own group of exclusive friends. Her backstory is uncertain but judging by her accent, tan, and thick, brown hair, I concluded she may or may not be from the Southern United States- Texas maybe. She was very much into food and could pack away the pounds like any man I have ever encountered. Though very petite, slim, and feminine, Neptune could eat. The only time I ever truly interacted with her was during last semester's welcome back karaoke-dokie night at a local karaoke bar in the Harajuku district. Neptune got into a small altercation with a middle-eastern gentleman that was set to be resolved in a sushi eating contest. Needless to say Neptune beat him by thirty-five seaweed rolls and three bowls of rice, earning applause and title of the eating champion of the karaoke bar, and still had enough energy to get up on stage and rock out to some Lady Gaga. It was a great night and truly the only night I ever seen Neptune really speak for such a long period of time. She was a typical American foreigner that had a heart and a love for Japanese culture. She embraced the Harajuku lifestyle with full-force; her brown locks becoming long, red waves of curls, her clothing going from ordinary t-shirt and jeans to loud, bright skirts, leather vests, with cutsey shirts sporting anime slogans and a vast array of buttons, as her simple, plain, makeup-less face morphed into an exact replica of a character from an infamous anime. I found her to be cute because the transformation suited her personality and not everyone- even some of the natives- could pull of the Harajuku look.

Neptune took a third of the group to tour the west side of campus and Hanna took another third to tour the east; leaving me with a third to show them the north and south corridors of the university. I was not all that familiar with the University of Tskuba but I made a point to do a full walk-through on my own so I could get a feel of where everything was located. In all honesty, compared to The University of Tokyo, Tskuba had better architecture and seemed more inviting than intimidating. My university had high-tech everything and just getting to class was like being in a rat maze looking for the slice of cheese. Here on Tskuba's campus, it felt much more spaced out and filled with welcoming, smiling students that would take the time out away from their gadgets and busy schedule to help a fellow classmate. I envied that to a certain degree. There were plenty of times where I became lost trying to navigate off that stupid map my campus bookstore have given me in order to brush me to the side to continue helping customers. It was refreshing to find an institution that had students look out and help one another. I showed the first-years their two libraries that were located on campus, a few of the lecture halls, administration buildings, cafeterias, and took a couple of breaks in between to ask and answer questions regarding student life at Tskuba. I felt like a complete shut-in because I could not answer none of them; showing how secluded and anti-social I have become. When I was not with Hanna, at school, or home, I was sticking my head in the books for an ounce of free time since I have grown to have very little of it since I started a new life in Japan. Being a housewife was not exactly what I expected myself to be at twenty-one but I could not complain. I just wish I had more of a social life and the gumption to actually get dolled up to go out to a local night-club or out to dinner with a friend aside from Hanna. As great and wonderful as she was, I felt like I could be a burden to her since she and Helga were the only contacts in my cellphone aside from family.

"We're going to take a quick ten minute break and meet back here in the center of the quad to meet back with the other groups and finish the tour." I spoke. I pointed my hoard of first-years to a few coffee vendors that were located on campus before I disappeared into the ladies washroom adjacent from the student center. I took a moment to myself to splash some water on my face and collect myself. Lately I have been getting anxiety attacks and been using Benadryl to help calm myself. It was technically allergy relief medication, but I knew a guy on campus that sold the medical strength tablets that could put you to sleep in a matter of seconds. I was too nervous to try speed and the sleep-aid tablets I was recommended to from a local pharmacist did very little for me. It went from me using a pill a week to get some extra hours of sleep in to me using about ten pills a day to give myself somewhat of a 'high'. Initially, it was supposed to help me catch some extra hours of sleep so I could allow my body to recuperate; but then it went from me wanting sleep to simply wanting the outer body experience. I never told my husband about it in fear of what he may think or say if he found out; my parents not knowing either in the horror of having them shame and ostracize me from our perfect family. It was hard being a student with a domestic life. Having a crappy marriage and a family I was not ready for did not help either. I reached into my pocket to grab my bag of pills, spilling out my phone. I saw I had ten missed calls and a bunch of texts. I sighed, dreading to look at my phone. My husband was a very possessive, controlling bastard that wanted me home by seven with his dinner prepared, ready on the table. I looked at the clock and saw it was five thirty. Tonight he was working a bit later than usual so I had about an extra hour to run my last few errands and get dinner on the stove by six thirty. Grabbing my phone, I exited the washroom and began making my way towards the quad. I reached into my pocket to grab one of my pills, but was knocked over. I was so preoccupied with finding my bag of pills that I did not see a group of people walking in front of me. I quickly apologized, reaching to grab everything that was dropped on my account.

"I am so sorry!" I squeaked, picking up a few textbooks, notebooks, and some small items from the snowy concrete. "I was not paying attention."

"Crimeny! Does everyone in Japan walk with their eyes closed!? I mean, this is the second time someone had run into me because they weren't looking!"

"It's alright, Helga. I'm sure it was an accident."

"Can it, Football head!"

Helga? Football head? I looked up from grabbing the last textbook to see my scowling best-friend, Helga G. Pataki, hovering over me in a pink parka, wool hat, and gloves; impatiently tapping her foot against a pad of snow. I lunged up to hug her, coming to tears. I thought I would never be happier to see that frowning face. "Helga!"

"Phoebes!?" she embraced me, looking stunned. "Crimeny, Phoebes, I had no idea it was you who ran into me like a complete moron."

I blushed. "I'm sorry, Helga. I am leading a tour and I was trying to rush back to get home." I turned to Arnold, giving him a small hug. "It's so great to see you all, but why are you here…in Japan?"

Helga shuffled her books back into order, putting them in her knapsack as she tried to deviate from the question. Arnold tried to muffle something in her direction but she swatted him away, telling him to give her and I a moment alone. She sighed. "Phoebe, so I emailed you saying I was coming to visit."

"Remembering!" I perked. "But that was not supposed to be for another two weeks. Did my father give you an earlier flight? Did he pay for Arnold too?"

She took a moment to respond, shuffling her feet against a nearby pile of snow. She kicked it delicately watching a few stray specs kiss the ice below. "No. You see, Phoebes, Arnoldo and a few of our mutual friends thought it would be a splendid idea to study abroad, you know, in the same country."

"For school?"

"Yes. I wanted to go to Brazil, but Arnold and…a few others chose Japan instead."

"Everyone is here!? In Japan!?"

She nodded, wrapping her arms around my shoulders as she began walking with me to the quad. "Yes. We all attend this fine institution of higher learning and funny story as to why I could not tell you I would be here for a semester…"

"Wait, wait, wait!" I waved my hands frantically, confused. I had to rub my temples to calm myself. Did she just say EVERYONE was in Japan? Attending The University of Tskuba, only a few miles away from my school? "You are here for an entire school semester, in Japan, and all of our friends are here?"

"Nothing gets past you, Phobes." She winked, clapping my shoulder harshly. I rubbed it to soothe the pain. The cold only magnified it, making it somewhat burn. "So yeah, back to what I was saying, Arnold and a few friends thought it would be great to come to Japan and study here…to see you…"

"Meaning…"

"Gerald."

My mouth dropped. Gerald was in Tokyo, Japan, studying abroad to see…me? I have not seen nor spoken to Gerald in almost four years. He had tried emailing me a few times because the number he had to my old cellphone was disconnected but I never responded. I could not bear the pain of reading a letter from the man I gave my heart to; only to have it broken and my soul to shatter into practically nothing because of another woman. The only reason I am somewhat sane is because of my husband. As faulty as he is, he helped revive me emotionally and mentally from my lowest point, staying with me, loving me like I was the only girl in the world he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. I never got that love and affection from Gerald. Though Gerald had his moments where he could be a true romantic, it was every blue moon. My husband was not afraid to send me roses every waking moment of the day, kiss me sporadically, or tell me every second of every moment he loved me. The thought of seeing Gerald was not exactly a pleasant one. What was I going to say? How was I going to react when I saw the only man I have ever loved besides me husband for the first time in four years? What would I wear? So many thoughts were running through my head that I drowned out Helga's long-winded speech about her flight over and slipped on a patch of ice. I hit the ground pretty hard, spraining my ankle from the awkward, distorted fall. Helga began helping me up, but I felt another person grab me from behind to lift me bridal style. All the pain I had coursing through my veins from my bruised ankle quickly vanished once I saw his face for the first time in almost four years. Our eyes locked as the hue in my cheeks from the icy winds of mid-winter Japan deepened. I tried to speak but I could not find the words to say, let alone know how to feel after seeing Gerald Martin Johanessen after almost four years. What made things worse was knowing I saw him for the first time in for years busting my butt on ice. Mortifying!

"Crimey, hair boy! Don't drop her; her ankle is red and swelling like a tomato!" Helga barked, checking my ankle from underneath my pant leg. I looked down and saw that my ankle was really swollen and that I could barely move it. The pain hit twice as hard as Helga tried to position it upright.

"Helga!" I screamed, swatting her hand away from my foot. "Don't do that!"

"Phoebes, I think you may have fractured your ankle." She spoke softly, "We need to get you to the campus clinic, pronto!"

"No!" I hollered, earning small stares from Arnold, Gerald, and Helga. I grew quiet. "I mean, I'm fine."

"Phoebe, your ankle looks pretty bad." Arnold spoke from behind Helga. He shoved his naked hands in his pocket. "We'll walk with you if you like; but you should get it checked out."

"I second Arnold on that, Phoebes. I think if you walk on it you will tear a ligament or something."

"You need to go to the clinic."

"No, I don't" I said with a finality laced within my icy voice. I needed to get home before my husband did. If he came home to an empty home, no dinner prepared, and found out that I went to the clinic and charged his credit card for an unnecessary medical bill, he would not be very happy. I tried to get down, putting pressure on my ankle. I yelped out in pain as I almost collapsed against the icy concrete of the quad. Gerald swooped me back into his arms and began walking back to the main campus. "W-where are you going? My tour group is that way."

"I'm taking you to the campus clinic, Phoebe. You can't walk."

"Yes I can!" I defended myself, turning around towards Helga and Arnold. "Helga, tell him I can walk."

She shook her head, folding her arms as she followed with Arnold in tow. "Sorry, Phoebes but hair boy has a point. You need to see a nurse right away before you do more harm than good."

"But, I need to get home and prepare dinner for my family!"

I felt Gerald tense up, clutching me harder as if he did not want to let go. I grew quiet as I figured fighting was futile. The walk to the campus clinic was a quiet one; small crunching of snow beneath snow boots as the playful conversation from Arnold and Helga echoed in the background. Gerald kept quiet, listening to one earbud of his music player, offering me the other. I respectfully declined, clinging my arms around his neck for added measure. I rested my head upon his shoulders as we walked, smelling his cologne and his personal scent. He smelled the same and it brought back so many fond memories. I noticed he looked relatively the same; only growing a few inches taller, having more of a muscular frame from the sports I heard he played in college, and his small afro he wore in high-school now filled with short, coiled, curls that suited him well. There were moments where our eyes would meet but I quickly turned away, blushing. I was self-conscience as to how I positioned myself in his arms. I constantly kept asking him if I was too heavy to carry but he would simply ignore me, continuing to walk until we reached the clinic. Helga alerted a nurse about the incident and showed us to a vacant room to see one of the campus doctors they had on call.

Gerald gently rested me upon the hospital bed and began shedding his coat. Helga grabbed Arnold to go get a cup of coffee, but I knew she was trying to give Gerald and I time to reconnect. There was a deathly silence intertwined within the air that even our breathing could be heard over the soft sounds of the clinic. I cleared my throat, shrugging off my ski-jacket. "T-Thank you for carrying me."

He nodded but remained just as quiet as he was the entire walk over. "How have you been?"

"Well, yourself?"

"Same."

There was another pregnant pause. I began to fiddle with a few strands of my sweater, pulling at a few to keep myself from looking at the man across from me. I could feel my face become hot as my heart began to pound in my ears. I tried to take a few shallow breaths but to no avail. Gerald seemed more into his phone than he was with me. I bit my bottom lip, gnawing gently in frustration. I did not understand why it bothered me the way it did that he was paying little attention to me but it really got me flustered. "What brings you to Japan?"

He finally looked up from his touchscreen, grinning. "Study abroad, international relations, politics, the culture, the usual."

"Oh."

"…Heard you were married…" he drew in a sharp breath. "Congratulations. I was not made aware until recently."

"It's nothing I wanted very many people to know about." I spoke gently, looking into his eyes filled with hurt. I wanted to hug him, kiss him just like we used to do when I was seventeen. "I hear you received a scholarship to play basketball at NHU."

He smiled, clearly proud. He had every right to be. Gerald's parent's made very little and the scholarship greatly increased his chances of attending college. Gerald was skilled athletically, but was also very intelligent. Helga told me in countless of emails and video-chats that Gerald was offered full admission to John Marshall law school in the fall for his high LSAT scores and extracurricular work on their universities debate team and student council. I was proud of him. "Yeah, I also got another scholarship to law school for the fall."

"Congratulations."

"Thanks…means so much coming from you personally."

There was more silence, almost awkward silence. I never been in an awkward situation such as this one; even the night I lost my virginity went much smoother. I began to sway my feet back and forth, ignoring the alternating pain in my right foot. I took a good look at it and saw my foot was the size of a small melon. It did not look too good either. "Gerald…"

"How is your husband?" he asked. "You have not said much about him."

"I tend to keep my personal life personal if you don't mind."

I could tell that stung him a bit by the way he shrugged me off, turning his attention back to his phone. I was thankful the doctor had come in just in time. "Well, hello, Phoebe!"

Oh crap! "Fujoka-sama, hello!"

He shook Gerald's hand before embracing me in a light hug. "What on earth are you doing here and not at your husband's family clinic?"

I swallowed hard, watching Gerald within my peripheral gag slightly at the sound of the word husband. "I was on campus doing a tour walk through and I slipped on a patch of ice."

"Oh dear." He took out his spectacles, taking a quick glance over my ankle. He shook his head in dismay before taking out his clipboard to write a few notes. "I think you may have a severe sprain or a fracture. It is not broke, thank Kami, but you will need crutches for a week for so."

I watched in silence as he pulled up a chair to get a better angle to further examine my foot. I looked up to Gerald protectively watching over me; peering over the doctor's shoulders to make sure no foul play was suspected. I fought a small smile as my heart fluttered, familiar sensations mixed with suppressed feelings resurfacing as I sat a few inches from the only man I truly loved aside from my husband. I winced slightly as a cold compress was placed against the swollen tissue, the Fujoka-sama reaching inside his medical cabinet for some gauze. "Does Kato know you are here?"

I shook my head. "No, I have yet to call him."

"I will take care of it." He smiled. "How is Haruhi?"

My breathing slowed, palms growing steady as the pink elephant in the room was finally addressed. Only Helga and my family knew about Haruhi and I made Helga swear to keep it a secret until I was ready to tell everyone about her…even Gerald. "Uh…she is well…."

"Is Kato picking her up from daycare? I can call to make arrangements for my daughter to swing by on her way from work if you like."

"That's won't be nesscary, Fujoka-sama." I nervously laughed, eyeing Gerald as he looked back and forth between the doctor and I. I tried to change subjects. "How is Kasumi?"

"Well, thank you for asking. She is developing quite well."

I watched in painstaking agony as the last layer of gauze was applied around my ankle; a small metal clip holding it into place as Fujoka-sama placed a small ice-pack underneath to keep the swelling to a minimum. He quickly told me I had nothing to worry about before he went to go fill a prescription for a month supply of ibuprofen to alleviate some of the pain. Before he left, Gerald thanked the man for his time and was given a run down on the severity of my ankle sprain through intensely detailed notes and information from a pamphlet Fujoka-sama gave him. It was not until he got half-way down the hall that he shouted out for me to take care and tell my daughter hello for him. Gerald's expression read it all, and he quickly dismissed himself; grabbing the coffee Helga suddenly had brought back from the cafeteria as he dragged Arnold down the hallway with him. I reached into my pocket, popped a Benadryl, and wished it would all go away.