Rob's My Last Yummy Birthday Tot

by ThreeHotPotatoes

Bella hates celebrating her birthday-and who could blame her? But her first vampire birthday MUST be celebrated, right? RIGHT? Hmm, maybe not. A birthday hot potato drabble collab for Robsmyyummy Cabanaboy. Oh...we know, Yum. We shouldn't have. (But we did!) Happy Birthday! Rated M for Madness. E/B, HEA ensured.

2. Chapter 2

Rob's My Last Yummy Birthday Tot

~O.O.O~

2

"Edward." Alice's soothing voice comes from behind me as her tiny hands wrap around my shoulders. Even though she's whispering, I know the rest of them can hear plain as day. "Bella's party will be great. She will have a wonderful time. You will get amazing vampire sex afterwards for three days straight. Now, can you please try to relax?"

My shoulders soften, and I peer across the room. Sure enough, Jas is beaming waves of calm straight into my skull. Next to him on the love seat, Emmett is wearing a smirk so big it almost cracks his dimples, and it most definitely shatters my momentary tranquility.

"Cut it the fuck out, you perv!" I shout at him, having unfortunately seen the porn reel of myself and my new bride playing in his big, ugly head.

"Dude, not my fault I have a vivid imagination," he sulks.

Rosalie is straddling his lap milliseconds later, and Emmett's simple mind shifts back to where it should be-on his own damn wife-and I get myself the fuck out of his thoughts before I see something I can't unsee.