Chapter 6 – Dust

Remus lay on the ground, resting his head on the hard, cold stonefloor. He knew he ought to get up, he'd become ill if he stayed like this, but he didn't want to do anything, he needed to lie down for a while, he needed to give in to the miserable feeling to gain the strength to face the others.

Remus stared at the dust hovering in front of his face in a ray of sunshine before it settled on the floor. He watched as the ray slowly disappeared as the night settled.

Why did seeing Sirius with that girl affect him like that? He had seen Sirius with tons of girls before; it wasn't like it was the first time he'd burst in on Sirius… kissing… a girl. It's because, deep down, you can't let go of that kiss, you were sure that it had to mean something that he kissed you, even though you did your best to displace it. The voice softly said. Remus snorted. Of course he knew that that kiss didn't matter, he wasn't a fool. Besides, he wasn't gay, he couldn't be.

"Remus?" there was a soft knock on the door, that Remus decided not to react on. "Remus, God damn it, I know you're in there," James yelled, banging violently on the door "Potter," Lilly hissed "That's not going to help, get away from that door, I'll take it from here" there was a sound of muffled voices, then a resignedly sigh "Come on, Wormtail, let's go" James said, then he shouted "You better not be dying in there, Moony!" there was a short pause, as James hesitated, soon followed by the sound of steps.

"Remus, please open the door" Lily softly said, Remus moaned as he got on his feet, he had to face her sooner or later anyway. Remus opened the door a couple of inches and Lily slipped in. Before he knew what was happening, he disappeared in a cloud of red hair as Lily flung her arms around him. "I've been worried for you" she muttered. Remus quickly pulled back, he suddenly felt guilty, that bright, kind Lily had worried for him, she wouldn't worry if she knew what he was, Remus bitterly thought.

"How did you find me?" Remus asked, "I went looking for James" Lily brightly said, then she added, as a reply to Remus' still quizzical look "He said that you usually go to the DADA classroom when you're distressed" Remus hadn't been aware of the fact that he was so easy to find. He'd had a feeling that he had three "secret" hiding places he went to when he was down, but he'd thought that no one else had noticed. When he was sad or confused he went to the lake, when he was very down and out of it he went to the DADA classroom, and when he was, deep-down-pitch-black-screaming-depressed and desperate he went to the shrieking shack.

"Nobody has seen you the entire day, are you all right?" Lily asked, pulling him out of his thoughts "What? Oh, I'm fine" He said, hoping that she wouldn't notice his probably red, puffy, eyes. "Have you seen Sirius today?" Remus said in a voice that he hoped sounded nonchalant, like: I'm just wondering where one of my friends is; I haven't seen him all day, and besides we're partners in transfiguration you know, something like that. It didn't go very well "What has he done now?" Lily instantly asked "Ehhh… Nothing… Ijustranintohimkindofhavings exwiththisgirl" Remus stammered, suddenly he couldn't keep it inside anymore and he knew that he rather talk about it with Lily than James or Peter "Sorry?" Lily asked, Remus took a deep breath and repeated: "I ran into him kind of having sex with this girl, and… yeah…" Remus shrugged, suddenly he felt extremely vulnerable.

Lily's eyes widened "I knew it!" she almost screamed "What, that Sirius has sex with random girls? Who didn't…" "No, silly, that you're in love with him" Lily said with a smug smile "I'm not… I wouldn't… Why…" Remus stammered "Seriously, Remus? You always get this distanced look in your eyes when you talk about him. It's quite obvious really" Lily declared "But I'm not," Remus said in an almost offended voice, he hadn't thought he was that easy to look through "Besides, I can't be gay, my parents would be even more disappointed with me" "I don't think they're disappointed in you because you're a werewolf" Lily softly said.

Remus stared at her for a couple of moments before saying in a barely audible voice: "How did you know?" If Lily knew, who else did? His mind was racing. Could it be James who'd leaked? Of course not, what was he thinking? James was one of the most loyal persons he knew. James would never tell. "You disappear every month around full moon, Rem. I'm not stupid you know. Besides your pals call you 'Moony' Not the most discrete nickname ever" Lily said, staring at Remus as if to say 'Duh' "You know," Remus slowly said "You know, and you're not… repelled?" Lily glared at him as if he's grown an extra head "Why would I be repelled? I know you. You're not a different person, just because you've got a little… problem" She hugged him tightly and whispered in his ear: "He likes you, very much" Then she let go and walked to the door. Right before she closed the door behind her she said: "You should talk to Amy, she also needs someone to talk to" The door shut and an extremely confused Remus was left alone in the classroom.

That's it for now ^^ I've named it Dust because it's legit (and I didn't have a clue what to name it...)

Hope you enjoyed it ^^ I actually had a great time writing it :3 (as soon as I escaped a minor writers block-attack)

Please review, that's what keeps me writing ^^