Chapter 14: Back in the saddle

Emily's heart rose to her throat as the Rock bus drove over the hill to reveal Boulder. She'd fallen in love with the city despite all the hard times she associated it with. Payson saw her expression and smiled "glad to be back?"

Emily nodded "surprisingly yes. Though I'll probably regret it when I have both Darby and Sasha breathing down my neck at training." She heard Sasha laughing from the front of the bus and rolled her eyes at Kaylie and Kelly. Darby had very smoothly asked Lauren to join her on the road trip back to keep her away from the others. The bus pulled into the Rock parking lot. Seeing her old gym sent a shiver down her spine – as she saw the parents lined up in front of the building with the banners above them Emily realised that her dream was finally serious now. Back in LA she had everything to gain and nothing to lose but now she had to be committed. There was no going back now. The thought excited and terrified her at the same time.

Payson gripped Emily's shoulder. "You can do it." Emily nodded, shocked at how the blonde girl seemed to be able to read her thoughts so easily.

Emily scanned the small group assembled in front of the gym as she stepped off the bus. Mark Keeler had his arms around his wife – he had a rare day off with his family. Becca was waving, genuinely happy to see all of them. Kim smiled warmly at Emily. She smiled back. After her own family and Margi's family the Keelers were Emily's favourite family in the world. Next to them stood Ronnie Cruz looking anxiously for Kaylie to come off the bus. Finally Chloe dressed in a leopard print dress was waving like a maniac, her purse being held securely by Brian.

"Mum!" Emily uncharacteristically emotional ran to her mother, tears streaming down her face. She hugged her tightly and whispered "I've missed you."

Chloe beamed. Any sort of affection from Emily was treasured. Her daughter was so too stoic in her opinion. "I've missed you too sweetheart."

Emily knelt down to hug Brian who looked close to tears. "What's up with her?" Brian asked, nodding towards Kelly. The brunette had grabbed her suitcase and stormed down the street. Emily shrugged "I'm guessing Momma Parker was too busy to pick Kelly up." She said as Kaylie and Ronnie chased after Kelly. "She'll be ok though, she's got us."

Dinner at the Kmetkos was just like Emily was expecting: disorganised with mismatching crockery and Chloe talking a mile a minute with Emily and Brian getting the odd word in. It made Emily nostalgic but at the same time she missed Damon like crazy. After Brian went to do his homework Chloe said "there are some people who want to see you Em, I told them to wait till after we'd caught up properly."

Emily rolled her eyes "Mum! I'm tired, just for one night can we please not socialise."

Chloe laughed at her daughter "these people you will want to see."

Emily groaned and followed her mother to the car. "Can you at least tell us who these mysterious people are? Or are you going to torture me the whole way there?"

"Get in honey"

Emily did her best to refrain from swearing and obediently got in the passenger seat "fine, but I refuse to be cordial." She muttered, turning up the old fashioned stereo system so that Damon's new CD blared, drowning out any attempt Chloe might make at conversation.

After a couple of minutes Chloe pulled up to a cottage with a white picket fence. It was in a similar sort of neighbourhood to Payson's: nowhere near as flash as Kaylie's but far nicer than Emily's. "Who do we know who lives here?"

"Wait and see kiddo." Chloe bubbled as she knocked on the door.

"You know this whole mysterious thing is getting old." Emily was about to continue her rant when the door swung open to reveal Summer, dressed in slacks carrying James. Emily gasped, and a lump rose in her throat. He'd grown a lot since he was born but Emily would recognise him anywhere.

"Would you like to hold him?" Summer whispered.

Emily nodded. Her son's dark her was messy and he smelled like talcum powder, his brown eyes lit up when they saw Emily. "Hey baby, Mummy Emily is here." She said, referring to herself by the name she and Summer had agreed on. She kissed the top of his head and James reached out a tiny hand and grabbed a lock of Emily's hair. Emily gently placed her hand over James's and pulled his hand away, he gripped her finger instead.

"He's strong."

Summer smiled "he is the son of a champion gymnast'

Emily forced herself to smile. She was getting a bit sick of everyone obsessing over gymnastics. She was other things as well, including a mother.

Summer placed a hand on Emily's shoulder "I just realised I have to pop out to the store, would you mind watching James?"

Emily nodded "I would love to"

"Actually I think I will have to go to the store every Monday evening, would that suit you?"

"Of course. Thank you Summer, really, I really appreciate you including me when you don't have to."

After Summer and Chloe left Emily sat James down with some building blocks. His chubby hands were just reaching the stage where they could grip the blocks and put them into piles. Emily looked around Summer's living room: it was pristine. Apart from James's blocks the room was completely tidy. There were two photos on the mantelpiece: one of Summer with her parents at her graduation and one with her and James. It was a nice room but Emily thought it lacked character. If it were her and Damon's living room the walls would be plastered with photos and there would be CDs and books scattered everywhere and Damon's guitars would inevitably be present. Emily sighed: she'd made her decision about James and it was for the best. She wished it just didn't make her wince every time she thought of her son and the life he could have had with her and Damon. She picked up her old beaten up phone.

"Hey Damon"

"Hey Mustang. How is Boulder? You kicked those Rock girls' arses yet?" Damon said enthusiastically.

Emily smiled "you're such a dork."

"And you love me for it."

"Very true. How's LA?"

Damon sighed, suddenly serious "It's nothing without you. The house is so empty." His words made Emily's heart wrench. "But I'll survive, at least I can cook mushrooms now."

"Ew"

"You're missing out. I'll make you like them someday."

"Uh huh"

"So what's new with you?"

"Well I'm sitting in Summer's living room playing blocks with James." Emily said matter of factly. She didn't want to get all emotional, it wasn't her style.

"Wow, how is he? Is he happy?" Emily didn't like the sound of desperation in Damon's voice.

"I think so."

"Good"

Emily hated herself with every fibre of her being. She was so selfish. She should have just kept James instead of breaking Damon's heart and turning his life upside down just so she could do gymnastics. "Look Damon I'm so sorry. I know how badly you wanted us to be..." Emily tailed off.

"A family?"

"Yes that"

"We are, Em: we're just not a very conventional one."

"That's one way of putting it I guess. I just feel awful."

"Don't you dare. James is going to have an amazing life with Summer and we are going to be involved and we get to follow our dreams. It's win win."

"I know I just wish it didn't hurt so much." Emily said quietly before pulling James into a hug.

XXX

"Again Emily, keep your knees together and you legs straight this time!" Sasha yelled. Emily groaned. It was her first nighttime training with Sasha and the other Rock elites and she was being quickly reminded of how tough Sasha was. She'd been doing this vault for over two hours without a break. That was four times as long as Darby ever made her do it. And she was doing well in vault, she could land her double twisting yurchenko in the pit and her second vault was even better, even though it had a lower start value. But for some reason Sasha just kept on pushing her. Emily gritted her teeth and did her vault again, forcing her body to stay straight in order for it to twist as accurately as possible. She did her blind landing and almost stuck it, with just a small hop. She saluted and walked over to get a drink.

"Better Emily" Sasha said as he came over to join Emily.

Emily was too exhausted to talk so she just nodded. It wasn't the enthusiastic praise she would normally get from Darby but Sasha was a different sort of coach and any praise from him was an achievement.

"Take a half hour break while I help Kaylie on floor." Emily beamed.

"Good job" Payson said as she joined Emily. The blonde was in one of her signature purple leotards and had her hair in a messy bun.

"Same to you Miss Perfect Amanar"

"It's hardly perfect, and seriously Em, you've come so far. You would have never tolerated two straight hours of vault training before James."

Emily laughed "very true, I would have sulked about how hard my life was. Much like Lauren's doing at the moment."

"You were never as bad as her." Payson said, her voice slightly bitter, slightly mocking. It made Emily sad to think of the state of the Rock team. Everyone was ignoring Lauren, Kaylie was quieter than ever and Kelly was so tense that she'd yelled at a level six for using her favourite beam at practice. The girl was reduced to tears but Emily thought it was pretty funny.

The girls watched Kaylie for a while. The short brunette was lovely on floor. She didn't have the raw power of Kelly or Lauren and she was nowhere near as good as Payson but she looked happy. Kaylie was a natural performer and the floor was her stage.

"She's good." Kelly said as she joined Emily and Payson.

"You're complementing someone else? Are you sure you're feeling alright KP?" Payson joked.

Kelly rolled her eyes "do you lot ever act your age? Your petty banter is annoying as hell." She said quietly.

Payson raised her hands in mock surrender "chill Kelly I was just joking."

Kelly rolled her eyes and sat down next to Emily. Emily and Payson looked at each other, confused. Kelly usually dished out banter with the best of them and she never got offended.

"Are you ok Kelly, you haven't been yourself lately?" Emily asked.

Kelly groaned and rolled her eyes. "I'm fine ok."

"That's crap Kelly and you know it. Is everything all good with your Mum?" Payson asked.

"I'm fine ok." Kelly snapped before walking over to join Kaylie who had finished her routine. Kaylie walked over to Kelly and hugged her.

Emily looked at Payson "what was that about?"

"I have no idea, but Lauren doesn't look too happy." Lauren had seen Kaylie hug Kelly and she stood up and stormed out of the gym.

Payson sighed "we're screwed for nationals, completely screwed. We can't afford to have all this drama!" She got up and went after Lauren.

Emily really couldn't be bothered going after Lauren so she walked over to Kelly and Kaylie. Kaylie saw her coming and went to the changing room. "What's up with her?" Emily asked Kaylie.

Kaylie looked at Emily for a couple of seconds. "Can you keep a secret?"

"You know I can." Emily said tersely.

"Well Kaylie has been staying with me for the past week or so. Things aren't going so well at home for her and tonight she's going to try and talk to her Mum. I can't tell you any more than that but I'd appreciate it if you and Payson eased up on her a bit. She's kind of fragile at the moment."

"Of course, thanks for telling me."

Kaylie smiled "it's so good to have you back, Em." She pulled Emily into a hug.

"It's good to be back." She paused, Kaylie had felt too thin but she didn't want to stir up any more drama "you're ok aren't you Kales?"

The national champion smiled, but it looked forced. "I'm fine, Em."

"Good, just remember you don't have to try and help everyone all the time, make sure you take some time out for yourself as well."

Kaylie smiled "I could say the same to you." She said before heading out to the locker room.

"I'm glad you're back Emily, the girls really needed you here." Sasha said making Emily jump. Her coach had appeared out of nowhere.

"I'm sure they were fine. I feel like I've caused so much drama, especially like I've turned the others against Lauren."

Sasha chuckled "that would have happened with or without you. And the girls need you – you're down to earth. They see how much you've struggled and it inspires them to keep going."

Emily grinned at her coach "well it works both ways, they certainly keep me entertained. There was nowhere near as much drama in LA."

"Em, Hollywood has less drama than the Rock."

"Very true, Sasha."

XXX

You could cut the air with a knife. That's how tense things were in the Parker household, they had been that way ever since Kelly had decided to go with the other girls to ask Emily to return. Kelly had come back from LA tired but exhilarated at the same time only to find Sheila waiting for her in the lounge.

"Where the hell have you been girl?" Kelly winced at the tone of her mother's voice. She had been drinking again. She had started when her father left them but she usually controlled herself when Kelly was at home. That was one reason Kelly tried to stay near her mother as often as she could despite the fact that she did not enjoy her mother's company at all.

"You know where I've been Mum, I went to LA remember. Coach Belov rang you: he told me. You didn't need to worry."

"I wasn't worried. I just can't understand why you gave up three days training to help out someone you hardly know when you could have spent that time at the gym. I can't believe how blasé you are about coming second at the Rock."

Kelly had spent her whole life blindly obeying her mother. Sheila had been the one who stood beside Kelly when her Dad left and she had always told Kelly that she had her best interests at heart. Kelly knew she had to push herself to win and that she needed to sacrifice almost everything. But what Kelly didn't understand was why she needed to alienate everyone around her to get where she needed to go.

Kelly had a sharp tongue and could leave the fiercest debaters shocked into silence but when it came to her mother she never had anything to say. Part of her still felt guilty about her Dad leaving and she felt sorry for her Mum. So all Kelly said was "I know you don't understand."

Then Sheila slapped her.

Kelly's cheeks burned red, more from embarrassment than pain. Finally she saw her mother through her father's eyes: she was manipulative and miserable and only valued Kelly as a way to get money. Kelly looked her mother in the eye. She was done being a timid little girl, she was a world champion, she had been providing for her family since she was nine and her mother had no right to treat her like this.

"I'm leaving Mum. I'm going to stay somewhere else for a couple of weeks. I want you to think about what you've done. Don't worry about rent or power just forward those to me and I'll make sure the deposits for food will still be on automatic payment for you. All I ask is that you don't come to the gym and don't follow me." She carefully picked up her duffel bag she'd taken to LA and walked out the front door. She closed it firmly behind her but didn't slam it, Shelia was not going to be rewarded by getting emotions out of her. She walked a couple of blocks to a nearby park where she often went for her morning run, put down her duffel bag and cried. She realised how stupid this all was. Reluctantly she pulled out her phone and dialled the one person she thought she could rely on, who always put others before herself, Kaylie.

"So you're back are you?" Sheila eventually said. Kelly winced at the neglect the front room was in, there were unwashed plates and cups on the coffee table, the curtains were only half closed despite it being 9.30 at night and Sheila was still in her robe. Kelly didn't know whether to be sad or angry.

"For now, Mum: I'm worried about you."

Sheila swore "you've got a funny way of showing it. Generally people don't abandon people they're worried about."

Kelly marched over to her mother and drew herself up to her full height. Which admittedly wasn't very much "you forced me away!"

"You had that slap coming for you my girl, you needed to be put in your place after your selfishness. Putting your stupid little friends before your career and family. I know you're all about being a team player but family comes first."

Kelly turned her back on Shelia so her mother wouldn't see her crying. She really didn't want to do this. She had been hoping like crazy that Shelia would have taking this as an opportunity to turn herself around. Kelly wanted her desperately to prove that she could live on her own and not rely on Kelly but all she'd done was confirm Kelly's worst fears. Shelia was nothing more than a desperate alcoholic.

"I know family comes first mother."

Shelia grinned "you've finally come to your senses then have you? Good, but I expect an apology."

Kelly gritted her teeth and tried to remind herself that it was the alcohol talking, not Shelia. "No, that's not what's going to happen. You are going to pack up your things and in the morning we are going to check you into rehab and you are going to turn you life around. I know you won't understand but I'm doing this because I love you." Kelly didn't wait for her mother to answer, she ran up the stairs and into her room. She locked the door so Shelia couldn't get in. Finally once she was in the comfort of her own bed she cried into her pillow, big rasping sobs until she couldn't cry anymore and she eventually fell asleep.

XXX

The beam had always been Emily's weakest event. No amount of natural intuition could make you stay on if you didn't land exactly right. And she was tall for a gymnast which made high difficulty on beam next to impossible. But Ellen Beals and the selection committee wouldn't even look at her if she didn't compete all around so reluctantly she mounted the beam with a simple leg up. She carefully made her way through her routine. She had just completed her fourth length which had a sheep jump in it when Darby called her over to her makeshift office in the building she was hiring out to train Emily. Emily bit her lip: Darby rarely ever interrupted her training and especially not on beam.

Emily walked over to Darby and saw that there was a middle aged woman with her. The lady was wearing a suit and looked quite enthusiastic when Emily introduced herself.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Miss Kmetko, shall we sit?"

Emily smiled anxiously "of course"

"I'm Linda Varr from admissions at Yale University. I know it's a bit early to be thinking about college but I speak on behalf of all of my colleagues that we were very impressed with your SAT scores, especially in light of the fact you are a top level athlete and you worked for most of your senior school years. Therefore it gives me great pleasure to tell you that Yale is happy to offer you a full academic scholarship for next year and for the rest of your undergraduate years provided you keep up a strong academic performance."

Emily sat there for a couple of seconds, completely shocked. This was amazing, but horrible at the same time. Eventually she managed to find her voice and she made the usual perfunctory response about being grateful and needing time to think and Linda left. Emily almost wanted to laugh at the irony, a year ago when she was pregnant if she'd been told she would have the choice between a lucrative scholarship at an Ivy league school and an Olympic career she would have been ecstatic but now it just felt like her head was about to explode.

A/N sorry for the very long wait! I don't have an excuse really apart from writer's block. Anyway I hope you liked the chapter, next chapter we have Lauren trying to save the day and Emily and Damon realising the impacts of the decision. I also have done an outtake about Payson talking to Sasha about the tape if anyone is interested. As always let me know what you thought.