Chapter 15

"When to you have to give an answer?" Darby asked Emily quietly. Emily was nervous by Darby's mood. She was usually so feisty and this air of resignation was so unlike her.

"Two weeks" Emily mumbled, looking down at her hands, all of her nails were bitten to the quick. "And I can't hold the offer till after the Olympics. It's now or never. There is no way I could train elite and meet scholarship requirements at Yale." Just the name of the Ivy League school gave her butterflies in her stomach.

Darby sighed. "It's your decision Em, I can't make up your mind for you but I'll support you either way."

Darby's voice sounded strained. Emily could tell that she thought she would take the scholarship. Emily forced herself to smile at her coach. "Darby, whatever my decision is, I just want to thank you so much for everything. You've inspired me, not just to be a better gymnast but to be a better person." Emily was shocked to find herself near to tears. Darby was a huge part of her life now, she was so much more than a coach, she was like an older sister.

"You've inspired me too, kid." Darby whispered as she wrapped Emily in a tight hug. And Emily hugged her back.

"I was going to see the others at Spruce Juice" Emily lied. She knew that she needed to leave before she and Darby both started crying in earnest.

Emily left the office and looked around the gym. She was surprised to find Kaylie and Payson waiting for her. "Uh guys isn't Sasha going to kill you if you stand there any longer?"

"He told us what happened." Payson said quietly. He thought we should go away and process it.

Emily raised her eyebrows. "Is he feeling ok?"

"He just doesn't want any more drama" Payson shot back quickly, making Emily wonder for the umpteenth time about Sasha and Payson's relationship.

"Ok" Emily said sceptically. "Spruce juice?"

"Always" said Kaylie, making the other two laugh. Emily and Payson shared a look: they were going to make sure Kaylie drank a whole smoothie. Their friend was too thin.

They had been at the cafe for about twenty minutes, and Emily felt heaps better. Kaylie and Payson were purposefully not pressuring her either way and they were both excited for her getting the scholarship. As Kaylie put it, it was a huge honour either way, regardless of whether she accepted it. They had moved on to discussing how to convince Sasha to let them decide on their own leos for nationals when Lauren walked over to their table.

"Hey babes, how's it going? Congrats on the scholarships Emz you totally deserve it."

Emily tried not to roll her eyes and failed. Part of her felt sorry for Lauren, but the rest of her wanted to punch Lauren in the face. She could see Payson was feeling the same way, the blonde girl's face had become totally expressionless – everyone at the gym knew that was a warning sign with Payson. Even Kaylie, the most forgiving of the three, ignored Lauren.

Lauren took no notice of the fact that the others were ignoring her and sat down, with a fake smile plastered on her face. "So this is nice" she said "the old crew back together again, what flavour did you get Pay?" she asked, picking up Payson's smoothie and taking a big gulp. "Oh blueberry, that's my fave, you've got good taste."

Emily curled her fingers up into fists. She had to make one of the hardest decisions she'd ever have to make and all she wanted was an hour with her friends to talk it over. Why couldn't Lauren just butt out, just for one hour? She couldn't take Lauren any more. Emily stood up and slammed her chair into the table, her only sign of anger – although it was enough to alert the others. "Thanks for the smoothie Kay – see you later Payson. I've got to get back home."

Lauren watched Emily go, somewhat satisfied. She felt threatened by Emily and it was good news about this scholarship. She'd be mad to turn down the Ivy League for a very long shot at the Olympics, especially since nationals were so soon. "What's with her?" Lauren asked.

Payson looked at Lauren angrily "do you actually think about anyone other than yourself?"

Lauren felt like she'd been slapped. Payson was seldom angry and she was usually supportive of Lauren, even when she was catty towards her.

"Wow everyone is cranky today, you know what I think we need a good old fashioned sleepover, just the three of us."

Payson glared at Lauren "shut up, Princess. You've effectively ruined Emily's chance of pursuing her dream by getting nationals shifted and you made Sasha seem like a paedophile so you'll excuse me if I don't actually feel like being your bff. As I said before, we're done – leave me alone!" Payson stood up and followed Emily.

Lauren was shocked but there was no way she was going to let Payson get to her, she still had Kaylie, her best friend. "I guess it's just us two then."

Kaylie sighed "look Lauren, you're a great gymnast and I know you've been through a lot, but so have the rest of us. And I don't want to sound like a bitch, but I've got enough on my plate without your drama. So it think it would be best if we just saw each other at the gym and not outside it." The national champion looked and sounded exhausted – she sounded apathetic rather than angry but her words cut Lauren far more than Emily's or Payson's had.

"Fine" Lauren said spitefully, she pulled her cardigan on and picked up her handbag.

"Lauren, wait" Kaylie said, and Lauren paused. "You need to find a way to earn back their trust. Emily and Payson don't hate you, it's just that you've hurt them both so much that they don't feel they can trust you anymore."

Lauren nodded "thanks Kaylie."

XXX

Lauren opened her front door, the house was quiet. Her father, as usual was still at work and the cleaner had left already. Lauren walked into the kitchen and made herself a cup of tea. She placed her gym bag on the floor and sat down on one of the bar stools. The incident at Spruce Juice made her realise that her teammates were growing up. It wasn't that they hated her, it was that they were sick of the drama. That scared Lauren, because instead of being angry with her for awhile and then making up it looked like her teammates were actually through with her. They saw her as petty and vindictive. Which was totally true but she needed to convince them otherwise. She didn't like to admit it, but her teammates were really the only family she had. Her mother was dead and her father absent most of the time.

Lauren finished her tea, leaving the mug on the bench for the cleaner to worry about in the morning and went up to her room. After an hour long shower and another hour spent drying her hair and plucking her eyebrows Lauren came back downstairs to find her father sitting at the dining room table with his steak and potatoes. Lauren looked at her father and was shocked by how tired he looked, there were bags under his eyes and he was pale. Lauren bit her lip, realising for the first time how hard her father must work. Nevertheless he smiled when Lauren entered the room.

"Hi sweetheart."

"Hi Daddy" she said and kissed his cheek before sitting down at her designated place at the other end of the huge table. She looked despondently at the salad Vanessa had prepared for her. Sometimes she wished she could have a burger or something.

"How was your day Lauren?" Steve asked.

"Fine, I stuck my Patterson dismount every time today. I can't wait for the American Cup."

"That's great honey" Lauren smiled at his praise but she couldn't help but feel that he was more pleased by the fact he'd be able to brag about his daughter's stellar beam routine than the fact that Lauren was happy with her routine. How did we become so distant from each other? Lauren wondered silently. We were close after Mum left but then we both threw ourselves into gymnastics and forgot about each other as people. I hardly know the man sitting across the table from me.

"Are you okay Lauren?" Steve asked "you seem quiet."

"Daddy I want to ask you a favour."

Steve looked resigned "anything Lauren, within reason."

"I want you to move nationals back to the original date." If that didn't win Kaylie and Payson back Lauren didn't know what would.

Steve spluttered, almost spilling his wine down his shirt "what did you say?"

"I want you to move nationals back, make a deal with Ms Beals."

"And why would I do that? I thought you were pleased she'd moved it."

"Well Emily needs more time, and so do I."

"Honey, you're sticking the Patterson you don't need more time, and I don't want you to start getting charitable towards your teammates. You need to put yourself first, it's a competitive time doll." He watched Lauren roll her eyes at him – a sight that was getting more common. "And besides you've got to learn that the world doesn't revolve around you sweetheart" He added as an afterthought.

XXX

The gym was buzzing with the news of the offer from Yale. It was meant to be a secret but then the Rock wasn't exactly the place for secrets. She did find it funny though how Rock parents who completely ignored her before were now acknowledging her and sucking up to her like they did to the other elite parents. Their two faced behaviour just made Chloe hold them in more contempt than before. What really worried Chloe was the impact that the offer was having on Emily. Her daughter only had a few weeks before nationals and her focus was all over the show. There was no way she was going to be ready in time if she did decide to continue. And Chloe really wanted her to. Her daughter was a born gymnast. She was never happier than when she was on the apparatus, and even though Yale was an incredible opportunity – it wasn't her dream and there would be other opportunities at great colleges. There wouldn't be another shot at the Olympics. Chloe sighed as Emily slipped off the beam for the second time in one routine. Emily needed more time and Chloe was going to do all she could to get it for her. She looked around her – Steve Tanner was sitting two rows behind her. He was the one person at the Rock who had clout with the NGO, and Ellen Beals in particular. And she still had something over him. She'd seen him in the strip club where she worked while he was still with Summer. Chloe had an idea. It was underhanded and tacky but Emily's future was at stake and everyone at the Rock thought she was tacky anyway.

"How's it going Steve?" Chloe said to her former boyfriend.

"Fine thanks, how are you?"

"Good. Lauren's coming along nicely isn't she? She's going to rock nationals with that beam routine."

Steve looked flattered by the statement which was exactly what Chloe was going for. The elder Kmetko had grown up in a tough neighbourhood and it had taught her that flattery would get you everywhere.

"Well I'm very proud of her."

"She seems to be recovering well from you and Summer breaking up."

Steve shot Chloe a look of fury that revealed why he was referred to as the most feared lawyer in Boulder. Chloe smiled sweetly "it would be an awful shame if she knew what you got up to in your spare time while Summer was waiting at home for you." Chloe walked away from her ex strangely satisfied. She wasn't one for blackmail as a general rule but some people just deserved.

"Chloe, what do you want?" Steve yelled desperately after Chloe. Chloe turned around slowly and raised her eyebrows.

"You seriously need to ask? I thought you were an intelligent man."

XXX

Emily was officially a wuss. It had been a week since she'd heard from Yale and she hadn't spoken to Damon about the scholarship. She'd pleaded exhaustion to keep their phone calls short and Damon hadn't protested. His manager was working him harder than ever so they hadn't had a proper conversation in a long time. But Emily knew that if she didn't tell Damon soon, he'd hear about it from somebody else. She reluctantly dialled his number.

"Em, this is a pleasant surprise." Damon said when he picked up the phone. "I was having a rough afternoon but you've just made it a million times better."

Emily cringed: why did Damon have to be so perfect all the damn time. "I'm glad – listen I need to talk to you about something, do you have a second?"

"Course – what's up?"

"Well I had a visitor at the Rock, a lady from Yale, and she um offered me a scholarship." Emily spoke quickly "it's an academic one so I'd need to keep my grades up, and I can't defer it."

There was a long pause and Emily was actually getting butterflies. Then Damon spoke "wow, that's big. But what about your gymnastics?"

Emily felt like Damon had slapped her. He was usually so unconditionally supportive. "Well I don't know I guess I would have to give it up if I took the scholarship, at least at the elite level."

"Riiight. Well I'm sure you'll make the right decision. Um I'm actually really busy, sorry I couldn't talk for longer, love you. Give John a kiss for me." Damon hung up and Emily bit back tears. Damon was her rock. Suddenly she felt like the sixteen year old who'd arrived at the Rock for the first time surrounded by unfriendly faces and feeling totally unworthy. Slowly she stood up and walked back onto the floor, ready for the second half of her afternoon session with Darby at the back of the gym – out of sight of the other gymnasts, and more importantly their parents. Emily knew that the secrecy side of her training was mostly for her own benefit but today it seemed like it was because Sasha didn't want her tainting the image of the Rock.

Darby was waiting impatiently for Emily. "Where have you been? We were meant to start five minutes ago." Darby was shocked rather than mad. Emily in the past few months had always been early and eager. Now she looked distracted and miserable, a bit like she had when Darby had first coached her at the Rock.

"Nothing, I was just talking to Damon, sorry I'm late."

Darby scowled. Emily needed to get her head together, nationals were just around the corner and Emily couldn't afford to worry about a boy, father of her child notwithstanding. She knew Emily wouldn't respond well to being yelled at so she just muttered "I want to see your bars routine please."

Emily was annoyed at Darby's tone. She was faced with one of the biggest decisions of her life and no one seemed to care. She rolled her eyes and went to chalk up.

"I don't want an attitude Em, I know you're stressed but you need to focus."

Emily gritted her teeth, why did everyone keep telling her what to do? She knew she was acting petulant but she didn't care. She leapt up to the lower bar, expecting to feel the rush of joy that always came when she worked on her favourite apparatus but her rhythm was all wrong. She switched to her first handstand to pirouette then slipped. She hadn't been looking to where she needed to put her hands and she stacked, her face hitting the mat. She swore under her breath. It was incredibly sloppy mistake.

"Get up." Darby said when Emily stayed on the ground.

Emily glared at her coach and jumped back onto the bars.

The training session had been lacklustre at best and a disaster at worst. Emily resented the fact that Darby had treated her like a child and she was mad at herself for not being able to get over it and focus on her routines. She changed into her jeans and favourite t-shirt before realising she'd left her shoes in the training room. She opened the door and saw Sasha and Darby talking. She pulled the door back till it was ajar and listened.

"She's not ready." Darby muttered.

"What do you mean? You've always been certain she can do it."

"Can, yes, wants, no."

"What do you mean, I thought you ironed out those personality issues."

"Well apparently it didn't work. Her bad attitude's back. It was eye rolling and backchatting all day."

Sasha sighed "I really wanted her to make it all the way. It's a shame to let such natural talent go to waste. I know any other elite would kill to have as much natural talent as her but Emily doesn't seem to appreciate it."

Emily was so angry that she was shaking. Everyone seemed to care only about her gymnastics and not about her. She slammed the door and stormed out without her shoes.

XXX

Chloe was mad. Sasha and Darby had upset her kid. Sure she was playing up but she had a lot of stuff on her plate. And it was all because the Tanners had to interfere with everything. She looked over to Steve, he was berating Lauren for her beam routine. Chloe heard the word 'useless' used at least three times, and by the time Steve had finished Lauren looked close to tears. Chloe recognised her opportunity.

"Need help?" She asked the short blonde girl.

"I wouldn't be so sure princess, you know as well as I do that there are only six girls going to the Olympics and there are three spots pretty much guaranteed and none of those three girls seem that fond of you at the moment. Which means you need an ally kid."

"What's it to you?"

"I want my kid on the national team for one, and for a few other reasons – besides if the girls realise you're responsible for moving nationals back and giving Emily more time they're more likely to include you." Chloe replied, thinking about the look on Steve's face if he thought Lauren knew about his little strip club habit.

Lauren was silent for a couple of seconds with a calculating look on her face. "What do you want me to do?"

"Well for now I just need you to look at your father over there – pretend to be really disgusted, and then shake my hand."

"That's it?"

"Trust me, that should be enough to get Mr Tanner nervous at least, and if he's nervous I can hopefully get him to make Ellen back down. And if he does I promise I will give you all the credit."

Lauren grinned, who knew Chloe Kmetko could be so devious? Obligingly pretended to listen to Chloe with rapt attention. Then she looked at her father with a look of horror on her face before shaking Chloe's hand. Chloe grinned and then looked over to Steve who looked terrified. Chloe winked at him.

"You'd better get back to training Lauren." Chloe said.

As she'd expected Steve marched over briskly to Chloe. "Tell me you didn't tell her. Seriously Chloe, that would tear my family apart, and more importantly it would destroy Lauren's career. Do you really want that?"

Chloe was disgusted by the fact that Steve put Lauren's career before her happiness. It made her almost pity Lauren, almost. Chloe paused for a while, making Steve squirm. "No I didn't. But she knows something's up. She's not stupid. And I think she should be told, and I will do that if you don't ensure that Nationals is moved back to the original date."

"You're pathetic Chloe." Steve said after a long pause.

"Pots, kettles, etcetera. Have fun will Ellen." Chloe said sweetly.

Steve snorted "I think you're the first person to have used Ellen Beals and 'fun' in the same sentence."

Chloe laughed, at least she and Steve had something in common.

XXX

The restaurant was discreet, if slightly seedy. The cheesy music was playing a bit too loudly and the lighting was bad but the food was decent. Steve stood as the lady he was meeting entered. She was dressed in a black suit, her greasy hair hung around her face which was paler than usual. Steve knew she'd been under pressure at work.

"Ellen, please sit down." Steve pulled out her chair for her.

Ellen beamed "thank you Steve."

Steve tried not to roll his eyes, why did this woman always think that he was flirting with her?

They ordered and Steve got the wine with the highest alcohol percentage, partly to make Ellen loosen up and partly to make the evening bearable. The woman was so uptight and fond of backstabbing that she reminded him of himself.

"So Steve, to what do I owe this pleasure?"

Steve leant forward and plastered a pleading expression on his face "actually Ellen I need a wee favour."

"I'm sure we could sort something out."

Steve gave a slight smile, careful not to betray how nervous he was. Appearing calm and nonchalant was one of the first things he learnt to do as a lawyer and the skill was coming in very handy tonight. "Well you know how Lauren is shall we say, quite emotional for her age."

Ellen smiled "well she's a teenage girl and it's nice to see a girl with some character and personality – but not too much" she added quickly.

"Exactly" Steve said "it's so nice to talk to someone who understands the girls – unlike some others."

Ellen was flattered, as Steve knew she would be. "Well I was an elite gymnast once. I understand exactly what Lauren is going through."

Steve forced himself not to roll his eyes. "Of course and the NGO is lucky to have such a distinguished gymnast in their ranks" Steve lied. "Now Lauren is having a bit of trouble with Sasha, it's nothing personal of course but they aren't really gelling too well and she needs a bit more time to be ready for nationals. So I was just wondering if it would be better for the gymnastics community as a whole if Nationals was moved back a few weeks. Maybe even to the original date."

"Yes well I don't want Sasha Belov's coaching methods to hurt the country's top gymnasts that's for sure. And I don't want one of the NGO's main investors to feel we aren't performing our best so I will definitely see what I can do."

Steve beamed, his first genuine expression of the evening "thank you Ellen, this means so much, really."

XXX

Emily dumped her gym bag in the laundry, too annoyed with everyone and everything to take her clothes out. Then she went into her room and turned up her stereo as loud as it could go, she didn't care if Brian had homework. She looked around her. Her entire room was covered in posters of gymnastics, her wardrobe full of leotards. She didn't like displaying her trophies in her room, but there were photos of her when she was announced onto the national team, of the meet in China, of the exhibition after nationals and lots of her teammates. Her whole life had been dedicated to gymnastics, and for what? For her to have one bad day and then her coaches to suddenly decide she was too immature to make it.

Overcome by a rush of anger Emily swept her arm across her dresser knocking all the photos to the ground. There was another world waiting for her – one that wouldn't require sacrifice every waking moment, one that would let her have the odd bad day. Yale was hugely appealing but then gymnastics was her passion. Her head felt like it was about to explode and Damon was acting weird and Darby just kept pushing her. Silently Emily curled up on her bed and cried.

A/N Sorry for the super long wait again, life is slightly crazy but the good news is that the next chapter is already pretty much written, I ended this one early otherwise it would have been about 8000 words. I hope Emily wasn't too annoying in this chapter but I think that's how she would have reacted. Emily tends to get mad at the world and think that life's unfair when she's stressed. And Damon is not being the supportive Damon we're all used to but remember part of the reason he loves Emily is because she's so focused on her dream. Anyways let me know what you thought and thanks for reading!