~Yesterday I died, tomorrow's bleeding. Fall into your sunlight.~

The red haired boy laid there, silently, lost in a dream, he wondered what had happened, he wondered is he dead yet, or in the middle of planes, he wondered if that is why he was stuck in darkness. The young boy bitterly laughed at the though of PokeGods deciding whether he should be sent to Hell or Endless pit Darkness.

The last thing he recalled was grabbing his pokeballs from his pockets, and tossing them violently with all his strength to the lake nearby. What happened next was him having all his bones shattered, causing an instant death.

Quick and painless, something he momentarily found odd, considering all the bad things he did, he deserved to suffer.

Their death was his fault, after all, he should have studied the place more, he had everything planned out, and made one miscalculation, causing them their lives. Silver was sitting in the darkness, sighing out waiting for his judgment to come. Everything was silent, everything was grim. This air around him felt odd, he can actually feel it moving around him, though he wasn't surprise, he was dead after all, it might have been the spirits taking him away.

~The future's open wide, beyond believing. To know why, hope dies.~

All these assumptions he created were wrong, instead he felt something violently push him to the ground. "URGH!" his chest hurt, his heart ache and burned, his head pounded, his bones were cracking, snapping, causing him to scream out in pain. This continued for awhile more. "AAAARRRRRRRGGHHH!"

The server pain was much to intense for him, he can feel hot tears forming in his eyes. Silver swore this pain would re-kill him, in the darkness he felt his vision give up, he felt like he was dying, he couldn't breath with these twisting pain he felt in every inch of his body, his legs trembled, his arms thrashed, the tears fell to the ground, he couldn't remember the last time he felt this horrible.

Though he can't tell which was worse, the pain in his bones, or the pain he felt long ago in his heart. Yes, they both were equal in their own ways, not too long ago, possibly about five months ago, the day he cried out all his bottle up emotions.

~Losing what was found, a world so hollow. Suspended in a compromise.~

"This is Red and Green~" a brunette with blue eyes gave a cheerful smile. The red hair male looked at the two boys, he looked to the side where Cyan was talking to Gold and Crystal, they were all at Pallet town, Oak's lab.

His sister figure, Blue, was introducing him to two boys he saw during the Mask Man clash. Silver gave a slight glare to the brunet who had tried to arrest him before during the ending of the battle. He recall him insulting Blue which just adds more hatred towards the boy.

"Hi! I'm Red~!" the black haired older male smiled at Silver, in response Silver only turn his head away. "Dwa-….?!" Red was taken back by the action, Cyan in the background started to laugh insanely loud at this. Blue sweat dropped slightly, she then turn to Green expecting him to greet himself to her little brother figure.

Yet the brunet just looked the other way. "Green." was his simple answer. Silver looked to the side, this time he receive a tiny pinch from Blue. "O-Silver…."

~The silence of this sound, is soon to follow. Somehow, sundown.~

At this, Gold started to snicker, though it was quickly stopped once Crystal slapped his arm. "Ow~!" he whined like a child, making the redhead roll his eyes. It was a rough greeting, but the seven Dexholders had met everyone properly, no crisis involved. There was a little party for their victory, and throughout it all, Silver kept staring at his pokedex that he was now allowed to keep. He wondered now that he was in the same group Blue was in, would he finally be able to be with her like old time.

Their main enemies are now taken down, he and Blue along with Cyan were now in the same group. Things would go back to normal surely, it would be him and Blue once more, maybe by the off chance he would talk to the Hatcher, but the redhead didn't cre about him, he just wanted to be with the one and only person he trust. The one that was always there, his one and only ally.

"Hey Silv~"

The person was the brunette female in front of him. He looked up at her, wanting to smile but was much to shy in front of others, not that anyone was watching, but he still felt awkward being around so many people. "Hey…" Blue sat down next to him, hugging him close, making him blush with embarrassment.

~And finding answers. Is forgetting all of the questions we called home.~

"Aw~ what a cute sight~" a certain raven haired boy smiled at Silver.

Blue rolled her eyes, always not liking this boy. "Argh… it's the perv."

"Hey!" Gold made a pouting face, as Silver restrained himself from laughing. "It's Mr. Perv~"

Blue sent a glare, making Silver feel better. "That's not something you should encourage you know!" Gold stuck out his tongue making the brunette glare, she then stood up, causing the Hatcher to flinch.

Silver took pride in this.

"I leave you two alone then~" Silver looked at his sister figured with widen eyes, he didn't want to spend his time with him he wanted to spend his time with her. being frustrated at the turn of events, Silver stubbornly looked to the side, as Gold waved Blue goodbye childishly acting like the victor.

~Passing the graves of the unknown. As reason clouds my eyes, with splendor fading.~

"Yatta~!" the boy with goggles sat down next to Silver wearing a big grin on his face. The redhead was not amused in anyway, he was silently pouting, looking to the side trying to ignore the boy and watching over his sister. "Ain't it great?" Gold kept nudging till he got a response.

"What is?" finally giving in, Silver laid back, not very interested.

Gold puffed a cheek and took out his pokedex after searching for it in his pouch pocket for a bit. Once the red machine was out, he shoved it in his friends face enthusiastically. "This silly!" the response he got was a look of disgust from the redhead. Gold now felt like his moment was ruined. "Oh come on, what's wrong now grumpy?"

"Leave me alone."

"Heck no." Silver made a slight grunt, not pleased at all, he twirled an empty poke ball secretly in his pocket, wondering if he stayed silent enough would the Hatcher leave. Sadly for him, he did not, instead engaged into a one-sided conversation. This is how it began for the redhead, in truth, Silver did find it a bit good that he was allowed to keep the pokedex, after all he would be able to close with Blue once more, that was the only thought in his mind. Being her and her only.

~Illusions of the sunlight. And a reflection of a lie, will keep me waiting.~

That is, after five months passed. He realized the harsh way, Blue was no longer his, he slowly realized, his sister figured he loved so dearly replaced him with the two boys named Red and Green. Deep down, Silver knew this, yet on the surface, he didn't want to believe it. It was the twentieth. A normal day where he and the Dexholders were at the lab, doing assignments and about to pick partners for a mission. When Oak asked who was going with who, Silver wanted to ask Blue, yet something in his heart made him waver, his hesitation made him look, witness a sight he didn't want to witness.

What he witness was the simple scene of Blue asking Yellow to be her partner. Of course, not after he witness her asking Red and Green, who seemed to have picked each other. The simple fact she asked those three before him caused a great deal of pain to him. His brain shut down, his heart ache and twisted painfully, his legs grew weak, his eyes stayed widen. He didn't want to believe it, he didn't want to ever see this.

~With love gone, for so long. And this day's ending.~

The day Blue choose others before him. He didn't understand, she was his only friend, he was his only person, yet… she gave her trust so easily to them. Nothing made sense anymore to the boy, his thoughts were rudely stopped and violently placed back into a box in the back of his mind when he felt Gold push his back gently. "Yo~! Imma pick you as my partner!"

His silver eyes that shimmered with tears turn back to cold stone eyes in one blink. He turn to cold, placing something he loathed so much. He turn to Gold, placing a mask on his face and sighed out trying to sound irritated so that the Hatcher wouldn't catch onto his grief. "Why am I not surprise." Gold only smiled in return with no shame in trace.

That day, before Silver and Gold went to their destination, they went to their own homes to collect some items they might need.

~Is the proof of time killing, all the faith I know. Knowing that faith, is all I hold.~

My mind was at lost. I couldn't really think straight, all I focused on was getting ready for this mission, I was stuck with Gold, I don't hate him, I just rather spend my time with someone else. But she wasn't available, so I was stuck with him. Walking in my base were I lived in mostly alone since Blue and I have many bases everywhere and she often switches her location or lived with Cyan sometimes, I noticed all my pokemons were already out of their pokeballs doing thing I really couldn't care about.

"Rr! Raar~!"

~And I've lost who I am, and I can't understand.~

I heard my Gyarados, the one I captured in order to defeat the Masked man, roar softly and chipper. It was weird seeing a vicious pokemon like him act so giddy, almost like a little child. It dose annoy me sometimes I just didn't really care right now, I just wanted to gets things ready and try to ignore this pain swelling inside me.

I wasn't used to of showing affection to my pokemons, I felt awkward with every action I did. I left my hand, as I did so the sudden memories of just a few hours ago where Gold forced me to be his partner flash by my mind. "Hey…"

~Why my heart is so broken, rejecting your love.~

I mentally winced at my own tone. I could see Gyarados confused face, he tilted his head slightly with confusion, something a child would do, something I was told I did. Pokemons, they always stay in their poke balls until they are needed, and placed back inside after their job is done. For some reason.

That feels familiar to me. Gyarados looked up at me, the shocked expression he made partly confused me, though my thoughts were jumbled, I didn't know what to think about anymore, that pain I felt when I saw her ask the others to be partners came back. Why did it come back? Why did it bother me so much? I can't control anything I think anymore, everything is getting mixed up.

Without, love gone wrong, lifeless words carry on.~

Something is wrong with me, I know it, I just can't stop thinking about it, being a pokemon. "I wonder… if I was a pokemon… would I still be…." words are stuck in my throat. I can't control my mouth anymore, I feel like something in my chest is exploding.

"Would I be…."

But I know, all I know, is that the end's beginning.

I can feel my eyes blur with tears, but why was I crying, I don't understand, what is this pain in my chest that is growing? I can hear them, all the other pokemons coming closer to me, shifting around behind me. I let my head drop to the ground, I watched my tears fall from my eyes. Sneasel was already crying, I don't understand, does he feel what I feel? Does he know what is happening?

Why? I'm not needed, I've been recalled back to my pokeball. No. I've been released without warning. I'm just a wild pokemon following a trainer who long ago released me aren't I? "Would I be… useful to her…?"

~Who I am from the start, take me home to my heart.~

The words that slip out of my tongue only adds more salt to my tears. I know it, a part of me knows I'm nothing to her. I've used up my time with her, a part of me knows that I just DON'T WANT TO ACCEPT THAT! I felt my throat burn, I can't help but choke out a sob.

My mouth open, I can't breath anymore, yet I still keep talking. "Would she… would be still here….!?" I felt as if my body was being burn alive in water. I couldn't breath, I couldn't see, my insides are twisting, I feel a sharp stabbing pain at my sides, I realize my hands are around my shoulders. "I-…. I-..!"

~Let me go and I will run, I will not be silent.~

I can't do it anymore, I can't hold it back. I feel as if…

… a part of me is dying.

~All this time spent in vain, wasted years, wasted gain.~

The red Gyarados nudged his Master, however this only causes the redhead to bury his face on the nearby bed. The sobs he choked back were now being violently pushed out, his voice ripped, he didn't care anymore. His pride and stubbornness were acting much too long. For the first time in years, he cried.

He cried the emotions he kept hidden, his mask he placed exploded in his face, leaving him blind yet making everything clear. The internal pain he felt was as if he was drowning in fire. He wanted to scream out, but he only sobbed out, soon bawling. Not caring who hears him. "Aaaa!… AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

~All is lost, hope remains, and this war's not over.~

He lifted his head, his tears damping his cheeks. Feraligatr only watched, listening to his crying, realizing all this time his Master was in pain. He didn't know what to do, he couldn't' talk even if he knew what to say. His arm was in mid-air, not fully wanting to accept that he was utterly useless right now to his Master.

But he could not deny the truth. He cannot speak the words that never comes to mind. All he can do was watch with the others. Watch his red haired trainer he once hated cry out desperately for something, for anything. Feraligatr turned to Queendra who was looking down, she couldn't look at Silver like this. Not like this.

~There's a light, there's the sun, taking all shattered ones.~

Ursaring watched as well, Murkrow was at the corner along with Gyarados, confused and shock. The boy he once hated for separating him from his son was now crying out like a child, shamelessly letting the bottle explode, painfully gripping the bed sheets. His crying only brought memories of his own son in pain. His wife had died in a landslide, and he could not get his son to stop crying.

Back then, all he did was cling to the hope she was still alive. Kept removing boulders after boulders. Listening to his son cry out for his mother. He didn't know how to stop it, to make him stop crying, he needed her, he was pathetic without her. Weak. And now, looking at his Master, he feels powerless, he feels desperate, all he can do was watch silently and remorse over his own pain.

~To the place we belong, and his love will conquer all.~

Sneasel was at his side, he wanted to let Silver know he was there, he was here. But the painful fact was that Silver didn't not want anyone but her. The brunette he subconsciously abandon him without warning. He wasn't sure why he was crying, possibly because he knew he couldn't know anything to help Silver.

Possibly because he knew what caused and started this and all he did throughout the whole time was watch him suffer. Even know, all he is doing is watching the redhead suffer alone. Darkness claim him once more in his face, Sneasel let it happen. 'I'm not a good pokemon am I… Silver…?'

~And I lost who I am, and I can't understand, why my heart is so broken, rejecting your love.~

At first, he was in a blind rage, after he calm down he became very loyal to the redhead. He was forced to evolved and was taken in by him. Gyarados is loyal to Silver, he didn't have a family nor did he have friends. As Magicarp he was useless, unable to protect or fight for himself, not even others. That same despising feeling he had for himself returned to him.

Confused and shock, he couldn't help the boy who trained him, made him into someone better, made him into a pokemon who can fight and defend anyone he cared about. He was happy being Silver's pokemon. And he was highly grateful to him. Which makes the harsh the fact that he was no use to his trainer right now painful to him.

~Without love gone wrong. Lifeless words carry on. But I know, all I know, is that the end's beginning.~

Even though he never showed affection to him, he can tell he was changing, he can tell that it wasn't his intension to be so cold. Lance helped Silver in many ways, Murkrow started to actually his like here with him. He knows he was reacting badly to this, but there wasn't anything he can do. He know this, he was just a pokemon and he was a human. There was always a clear difference.

Murkrow knew this from the beginning, what he didn't understand know was that why did it bother him so much? He can't talk to him, or make him feel better, he knows this and yet he hates this, the frustration caused him to turn away, and shut his ears with his wings, pretending he wasn't here, pretending he was in his pokeball. Pretending like his Master wasn't crying in despair.

~Who I am, from the start, take me home to my heart. Let me go and I will run, I will not be silent.~

He wasn't sure how long he was crying, Silver felt as if the tears would never stop. He would ask himself why didn't they stop? Why did his body hurt so much. During all his tears, during the time he was shredding his voice. The Exchanger had forgotten why he was crying. Which only made him feel stupid, crying over something he can't even remember.

His mind was confused and angry, he didn't even know what to feel anymore. "AaAAAAAHHAAAHH!"

Soon his voice would break. Soon his tear ducts. couldn't produce more tears. His eyes couldn't stay open. His will to stand was no longer there. He felt like a broken doll left in the corner. Never to be played with again. When his pokemons realized he was done crying, they slowly started to gather. Queendra and Ursaring moved Silver slowly, making his body lay on the bed.

~All this time, spent in vain. Wasted years, wasted gain. All is lost, but hope remains. And this war's not over.~

Gyarados made a fortress around him, Sneasel hopped on the bed, an started to cuddle close with his Trainer. They noticed he was already passed out, a line of tears staining his face. His hair stuck to his skin messily. Murkrow stood on top of the counter, looking down at Silver, feeling like a bad being. A selfish being who shouldn't be here.

"Yo~! Silv you read- Huh?"

Queendra whipped around, knowing Silver would want to keep his pride and ordered Gyarados to make sure the Hatcher didn't come closer. Obeying her orders, the red water type slivered close to Gold violently, making him wince and jump back. "H-hey..! What's wrong with…. You…"

Gold looked at the redhead closer. "He's sleeping…?" Murkrow nodded his head. Slowly the young boy placed his hands up, wanting to come closer. Ursaring shrugged and let him. Queendra turned away the moment he got close enough to see his face. "Wha-…."

His hair covered most of his face, though Gold can still see the tear stains. He know felt awkward being here. He also felt like a bad friend for not being here, though a part of him thinks it was better off that way. The Hatcher sat down and decided they can be late to the meet up, he was more concern over Silver's well-being rather then a survival test.

~There's a light there's the sun, taking all shattered ones. To the place, we belong, and his love will conquer.~

That day. I felt like something died in me, after that I never once thought about that day, until now that is. I still to this day refuse to acknowledge that. Even to my very death I was stubborn. Here I am now, getting my bones crushed, comparing the two painful experience, I would have to say that wins any day. After this, I'll be officially dead.

I don't mind really. I just… wanted to say goodbye to them. To my pokemons who were there for me when no one else was. I just wanted to say goodbye… to them. That would be my final wish. I doubt I would actually get it. I don't really deserve it but still. It isn't for my sake alone. Ironic, I was supposed to make sure we didn't die, and I ended up killing us before we were even half way there. I guess I really am weak, no wonder she got rid of me…

Crack!

~Yesterday I died, tomorrow's bleeding. Falling into your sunlight.~

HOORAY FOR MORE FILLERS! This chapter explain all those flashbacks Silver's team remembered, this is the whole story and this is the reason he was crying~ as well as you can see, the ending and beginning, Silver is in the process of moving to the afterlife

I would like to point out, that this chapter was done for a loooooooooong time. No like seriously, I wrote this chapter around the same time I posted up part 6/8 so it's kinda old LOL I'm in the middle of P18 but I don't think I'll be posting it up tomorrow since I might not get it finished. But hey! 3 parts in a row is good right?

ank you all who follows this! I know there's like five people who reads this and three of them is only on dA and the other two are on even if it's just five people, someone is reading and that makes me happy =w=~ reviews highly encouraged! Thank you all~ hope you enjoy is as much as I enjoyed writing it 3