Disclaimer: I still do not own Harry Potter.

Wow! The response to last chapter was awesome! Thanks for all the great review comments! Here's the next installment.

Chapter 52: Lost and Alone

The next morning, Harry and his friends were sitting at breakfast when Hermione let out an "Oh!" at the headline covering the front of the Daily Prophet.

"What is it, 'Mione?" asked Ron curiously between mouthfuls of kippers and sausages.

"Sturgis Podmore," Hermione said softly. "He's one of the Order members. He was arrested yesterday and will be in Azkaban for six months."

This couldn't be good, Harry thought. "What for?" he asked.

"It says he tried to barge into a very important part of the Ministry," explained Hermione. "It doesn't elaborate on where, but it says he tried to get through a door and was caught."

Wonder if it's the Department of Mysteries, Harry thought cynically. Wonder if Voldemort or one of his henchmen put him under Imperius and wanted him to get the damn prophecy for him or something.

Harry decided he was going to ask Sirius and Remus about this. He had therapy with them this morning, after all.

xxx

After breakfast, it was time for Quidditch tryouts. Harry made the decision that he was going to go and watch, to see who would be a great Keeper. Hermione, even though she wasn't too fond of Quidditch, told him she'd join him, along with Ginny and Neville. Ron said he'd meet them there, he had something to do first.

But soon before tryouts were to start, they could see Ron walking out onto the pitch, holding his broomstick. All the hedges from the horrible maze last June had been taken away now, and Harry was relieved. But he still felt a horrendous jolt of emotional pain when he thought about the Hufflepuff team, who was now without an excellent Seeker.

"Wo, I didn't know Ron was trying out!" breathed Ginny. "He probably didn't tell us because he was afraid Fred and George would find out. They'd never stop teasing him if they did. He's a pretty good Keeper; I hope he doesn't get too nervous."

Harry was impressed that Ron had the guts to do this. Thinking back to breakfast, he hadn't eaten as much as usual. He must have been trying to hide his nerves from the other students.

As time progressed, many people tried out. Some of them were quite good, but others were absolutely hopeless. One boy didn't block a single goal. When it was Ron's turn, everyone watched with bated breath. Thankfully, he seemed to play the best out of everyone, but Harry could see at once that he had a lack of confidence; the two of them would have to work on that. Harry knew how it felt to not feel as if you could do something, and he wanted to show Ron that his Quidditch skills could be improved upon.

The captain, Angelina, gathered the rest of the team, including Harry of course, and they all made their decision. Harry tried not to be biased since Ron was his good mate, but he still thought he'd played the best out of all the candidates. Angelina had to agree, though, so it was good news they brought to Ron as he waited impatiently on the pitch. Once he found out, he whooped with joy.

But that all changed when Harry and his friends got back to the common room. Ginny had just gone to her therapy session, and Fred and George, after taking the mickey out of Ron, were testing their products on first-years again. A game of Exploding Snap had just started between Harry, Hermione, Neville, and Ron when Hermes, Percy's screech owl, tapped at the window.

"What's he doing here?" Ron asked, surprised. "I thought Percy hated all of us." He opened the window, letting Hermes in. He saw that the letter was addressed to him and untied it from his leg and unfolded it. As he read, his face grew angrier and angrier. At the end of it, he crumpled it up and threw it into the fire.

"Ron, what's the matter?" questioned Hermione, concerned. "You didn't even give us a chance to look over it."

"You wouldn't want to, anyway," said Ron, fuming. "I'm telling you, he's the world's biggest prat!"

"What did he say?" asked Neville.

"Basically I should "sever ties" with Harry," Ron said angrily. "He's congratulating me for being a Prefect but then saying how disappointed in me he is about the fact that I got in trouble with Umbitch. "She's a delightful woman." Bah! He's lying through his teeth! Umbridge must have told Fudge about my little yelling match on Monday, and the news must have gotten back to old Bighead Percy."

"Wow, I'm sorry, Ron," said Harry, feeling guilty and uncomfortable. Percy was making Ron and the Weasleys so angry all because of him. Dumbledore was also in the thick of this, and Harry felt awful for making him go through all this as well. And worst of all, this was an insult to Cedric's memory. The seventeen-year-old had gone out like a hero, and hardly anyone was recognizing that.

Ron sat back in his chair and said nothing, but he kept glaring at the floor every few seconds. Hermione seemed to know what Harry was thinking, for she put a comforting hand on his shoulder. After a little while, he grew irritated and just wanted to be left alone, so he got up, gave her a pleading look not to follow him, and walked out of the common room.

He walked around the castle, stopping at the top of the Astronomy Tower to think. With another pang, he couldn't help remembering vividly the time he'd woken up here with Cedric and Cho bending over him. It was before they had become a couple, but they had still been best friends at the time. They'd seen him with tear tracks on his cheeks, for he'd been thinking nonstop about Uncle Vernon's trial. Cedric had made him feel safe, warm, and protected. As he'd fallen asleep in his dorm, he could remember the older boy tucking the blankets around him. Merlin, he was everyone's dream brother. He was such a wonderful person and he had to be cruelly killed by Voldemort right in front of Harry. He missed him so terribly, and the ache in his heart hurt so much. Why couldn't people accept what a great person he had been and believe he'd gone out fighting for the right thing? Instead they believed that Harry was nothing more than an attention-seeking liar.

A few minutes later, Harry slowly made his way to the Room of Requirement. He knew Sirius and Remus too well; they'd recognize his bad mood instantly and they'd want to talk to him about it. Part of him didn't feel like answering, but another part of him wanted to talk all day long. He wanted to finally hold a conversation with someone other than his friends who believed him.

When he got there, he knocked on the door, and his guardians told him to come in. The room was the same as always, and Harry sat down on the fluffy couch between them.

"What's wrong, cub?" Remus asked immediately. "You look really upset."

"Yeah, you seem really out of it," commented Sirius. "What's bothering you, pup? Is it something someone said?"

Harry couldn't take it anymore. "It's EVERYTHING!" he burst out. "No one seems to believe me except you guys, my friends, and a few of the other students! Everyone else thinks I'm lying about Cedric, about Voldemort, about everything! And then I'm worried about you two always going to protect the prophecy, what if one of Voldemort's lackeys does the same thing to you as they did to Sturgis Podmore?"

"You heard about him?" Remus asked gently. "Yes, I'm afraid the Department of Mysteries was where Sturgis was trying to get to. But Peter knows Siri and I can both fight the Imperius Curse. I don't think they'd try that move on us."

Harry only felt slight relief at this; the worry was still eating him alive. "Umbridge's lessons are ridiculous," he fumed. "And she tried to tell Cho that Cedric's death was not caused by Voldemort. How horrible is that! I saw it happen with my own eyes! What's the matter with her?"

"She's a foul bitch, that's what," Sirius said disgustedly.

"Sirius, language," Remus warned. "But Harry, pay her no attention ..."

"Pay her no attention? Pay her no attention?" Harry shouted, standing up. The last week had really, really gotten to him. "How can I pay her no attention when I have to see her every single week for Defense Against the Dark Arts? We're not learning anything in that class, and I don't want to lose more friends like Cedric because of Voldemort! No one will be prepared if Umbridge doesn't let us learn spells!"

"Harry, calm down," his guardians tried to urge him, putting hands on his shoulders and sitting him back down. "We know you're angry, cub," Remus said. "And Padfoot and I both have problems with Umbridge, too. But we don't think this is going to go on for long."

"Voldemort will show himself before long," said Sirius soothingly, the anger just beyond the surface. God, he couldn't stand Dolores Umbridge. "And then the Ministry will be trying to say they're sorry."

"But how many people I love will die before the Ministry does that?" asked Harry bitterly. "Voldemort already killed Cedric!"

There was nothing Sirius or Remus could say to make Harry feel better at this point. They knew the boy just had to get everything off his chest, he just had to rant and rave. They could still see the heartbreak on his face, the heartbreak of not being able to do anything to save Cedric's life. Sure enough, Harry said, "I let Cedric down, you know. He did everything to try to protect me, and I couldn't do the same for him."

"Pup, you did everything you could," Sirius tried to tell him gently, taking one of Harry's hands within his own while Remus took the other. "We feel awful that you had to lose a friend like that and we know you did everything you could to try to help him. Kiddo, do you think Cedric would want you feeling like this?"

As Sirius was talking, he felt his own guilt arise. The advice he was giving to Harry was hard advice for him to follow himself. Every single day he faced the demons of James and Lily's deaths and the part he'd played in them. He'd done everything possible to try to save their lives but Voldemort had still gotten to them. And it was all Sirius's fault that he had.

"I don't know what Cedric would think, do I?" Harry spat. "He's not here for me to talk to, and never will be again, so how should I know?"

"Harry, cub, you knew and were friends with Cedric for over a year," Remus said. "He knew Voldemort was after you, and he knew the danger that posed for himself. He stayed friends with you despite that danger because he loved you, in his own way. Friends always stick by each other, Harry. They don't desert you when the going gets tough. We didn't know Cedric as well as you did, but we're positive he wouldn't want you to beat yourself up over this."

"I just can't help it," Harry cried, his head in his hands. In a trembling voice laced with tears, he explained how the nasty letter Percy had written to Ron had been the straw that broke the camel's back.

"Percy will come around," Remus said. "Harry, we know what we're saying are just empty words right now, but Molly Weasley has told us a lot about him. Percy's always wanted to feel important, he's always dreamed about working at the Ministry."

"Yeah, Ginny told me," Harry mumbled.

"He desperately feels like he wants to belong somewhere," said Sirius. "And he's so different from the rest of his family, he feels like the odd one out. I know that feeling all too well, living in mine. I felt like we were on different planets or something."

"But that was different," Harry protested. "At least you didn't go around calling people liars and attention-starved losers."

"I know," Sirius said softly. "But one thing you've got to understand about Percy, Harry, is that he's very stubborn. Remus and I are sure that once Voldemort shows himself, he'll want to come crawling on home."

"Dunno how accepting Ron will be of that," Harry muttered. "He crumpled up his letter and threw it into the fire after reading it."

"Well, that should show you what a good friend Ron is," Remus said, smiling gently at Harry, who still looked distraught. "He believes you, despite what his brother says."

"And we know you're upset about Cedric," Sirius said. "Remus and I know from first-hand experience about the loss of a friend; we've both been through it before, in the First War. We can't tell you that you'll ever stop missing him, but we will say that it gets better with time."

"It doesn't feel like it right now," said Harry thickly. His guardians put their arms around him, and Harry totally lost it. All the pent-up frustration and sadness of the last week all came spilling forth. Oh, Cedric. As Jeff, Stanley, and Malcolm had said, the older boy had offered him kindness, respect, friendship ... He remembered Cedric's eyes after he had been killed, the totally blank look in them. Before, Cedric's eyes had been comforting to look into; they had radiated honesty and kindness, but at the end they had been so, so empty. Harry buried his face in his guardians' robes as hot tears poured down his cheeks. The sadness tore at him like the biggest knife wound of all, and he didn't think it would ever go away. He had no idea how long he stayed like that, but knew it was a pretty long time. He kept seeing Cedric's limp, lifeless body in his mind's eye, the screams of "Dead! Dead! Dead! Dead! Dead!" ringing in his ears.

xxx

Harry spent the rest of the day in a kind of autopilot haze. He felt shattered and exhausted after the therapy session, but was grateful to his guardians for once again treating him with tender loving kindness. He apologized to them for shouting at them earlier, but they weren't phased by it at all. They were actually glad Harry hadn't bottled up his feelings and instead shared them.

He fell asleep that night to the comfort of Ron's snores, hoping that things would seem better in the morning. As it happened, he did wake up feeling a little more like himself the next day. He felt as though his soul had been bathed in water, cleansed and ready to start fresh. This was how he sometimes felt after a difficult session with his two adopted fathers.

But another nasty surprise came that morning with all the post owls at breakfast. Ron was still in a foul mood, but was treating Harry normally; he didn't blame him for the letter at all.

"Oh, no," breathed Hermione when the Daily Prophet arrived.

"What is it?" asked Harry, that familiar feeling of dread building in the pit of his stomach.

"Umbridge has become the Hogwarts High Inquisitor," she said, a disgusted sneer on her face. "Apparently she now has the right to inspect all classes to see if the teachers are up to snuff. If she finds that they aren't, she's totally within her boundaries to fire them."

Harry scowled. "Who made up this rule?"

"Fudge, of course," said Hermione. "The Ministry's really starting to interfere at this school now."

Ron began to snicker, and Hermione raised a questioning eyebrow at him. "I can't wait until she inspects McGonagall," he guffawed.

"Yeah, that'll be a good one," said Ginny, squeezing Harry's hand. "McGonagall won't let that toad ruin her class!"

"True," said Ron. "But man, I can't believe this! I forgot to tell you all that this was also in Percy's letter. He mentioned something about an important article today."

Ron had caught Ginny up on everything Percy had said to him in his letter yesterday, which had caused her to say viciously that next time she saw the prat, she'd paint his face with a horde of bats and bogeys, because he deserved it.

The rest of the day was spent doing homework outside. The weather was nice, so they decided to do it under the beech tree James, Peter, Remus, and Sirius had so often occupied in their Hogwarts days. They invited Cho to join them, and she was pretty angry as well when Ron informed her of Percy's letter. She was furious on Harry's behalf that Percy was being such an idiot. Harry still couldn't believe it when it came to Cho. Cedric had been her boyfriend and yet she still wanted to be friends with him. Maybe what everyone was saying was really true; maybe it really wasn't Harry's fault that Cedric had died. But it would take a lot of time for this to sink in. Cedric had been dragged along for the ride when Voldemort had only needed Harry, and it shouldn't have been that way.

At supper that night, the talk of the Great Hall was the next morning's classes. All the students were wondering what Umbridge's inspections would be like, and Harry was one of them. How humiliated would she make the teachers feel? Would she ask the students questions about their classes? Harry vowed to himself that he would defend them all, that he wouldn't give her a reason to fire any one of them. He desperately wanted Hagrid to return, but also dreaded it; he didn't want Umbridge to belittle him just because he was a half-giant and find a reason to sack him.

So when Harry drifted to sleep that night, he got his mind ready for the next morning's happenings. It would definitely shape up to be an interesting day.