Ok, so I wanted to get this up fairly quickly because people were complaining saying they'd quit reading if Finn cheated on Rachel. Well, they weren't together when it happened, so no cheating on anyone's part. Let me know if you all like the direction this went. I need feedback to continue this. Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 4: Nightmares

8 years ago
"What are you doing here, Finn? I thought you went to New York to be with Rachel?" Quinn asked upon opening the door to her condo on the beach that she had rented over Spring Break. Like a little gift to herself for a year almost done. She didn't let him in, not yet. She took in Finn's military uniform and wondered just what he was planning. "And now you've joined the military? Not sure how this is supposed to fit into your plans of hooking up with the woman of your dreams."

"I did go to New York, but I saw her with another guy," Finn looked so dejected. Quinn opened the door wider, letting him come over the threshold. She closed the door and led him into the kitchen. "Do you want some lemonade?" she asked as she headed to the fridge, grabbing the pitcher from the top shelf. She reached above her head, opening the cabinet and taking down a glass, waiting for his answer before she shut the door. "It's got rum in it."

"Ya, that would be great," he nodded with a weak smile.

So, she grabbed another glass and poured the remaining lemonade and rum into the two glasses before dumping the pitcher into the sink. She picked up the glasses and led Finn onto the back porch where she had a killer view of the sunset over the ocean. Finn trudged along behind her. "I'm still not sure why you came here," she said, breaking the silence as she sat down on the porch swing.

Finn shrugged as he sat beside her, accepting the glass of lemonade, tasting it before he answered her. "I'm stationed in town. Had a free day today. I just wanted to see a friendly face." His gaze stayed frozen on the ocean. Quinn could see he was hurting inside, but she wasn't sure how she was supposed to make that go away.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked finally.

He didn't say anything for the longest time, and Quinn assumed he wasn't ever going to say anything. "His name is Brody. The guy she's been seeing. I didn't expect her to move on so soon. Or for this to hurt so much."

"Did you go talk to her?" Quinn asked gently.

Finn shook his head, "I sent her to New York of my own free will. What right do I have to come in and mess up what she's made of her life? She deserves better than me. I broke her heart first. Kurt told me everything about the new guy. They seem to be pretty close. Who am I to ruin her happiness again? I've done it enough."

Quinn took a deep breath. The three of them had been tangled in too many webs for her to be comfortable. To think that Quinn had hated Rachel in the beginning, making her life a living hell every day. No one thought they'd ever get close. No one. Not even each other. But, sometimes life has other plans for you. Something to bring them together. And the common thread was Finn. And Glee, Quinn supposed, looking back.

Rachel was a good friend to Quinn, always had been, even when Quinn never gave Rachel a reason to be nice to her. Rachel was the only one that had understood any of the crap Quinn had ever gone through. Maybe not completely, but enough to be able to be supportive and help her through all the turmoil. Enough to make Quinn call Rachel a friend. Maybe even a close friend. The two talked on the phone a few times every month to catch up.
Rachel lived such a grand life in New York with NYADA and her showcases she'd win. She was making something of herself. Already, as a freshman. And what was Quinn accomplishing? Well, she was on the Dean's list. And that counted for something, right? She had made a lot of friends and was a part of a few extracurricular activities. The boys came around a few times, but Quinn was enjoying being single right now. She didn't need a man to define her. She was independent. Confident. Assured.

Finn sighed, "Do you have anything stronger than this?" he asked, emptying the glass. He looked over at Quinn expectantly.

Quinn nodded. "I've got some Vodka if you'd like some of that?" she stood up and headed into the kitchen without waiting for an answer. She grabbed the bottle off the shelf and opened it, handing Finn the bottle.

He was about to pour himself a glass, but suddenly had a better idea. He drank right from the bottle. He set it back on the counter, pushing it towards Quinn. So, they were going to drink their problems away, huh? She could be up for that.

Before either of them knew what was what, the bottle was empty, and they were sitting on the back porch steps. The night air had a slight chill to it, and they were huddling together for warmth. Finn had vented and nearly cried about Rachel and the life he thought he'd never be able to have with her anymore. Quinn complained about how she wanted more out of life, to really matter, to help people. She wanted to be better than who she was in high school.

"I know you were meant to do great things," Finn told her. "I always thought that." He still loved Quinn. Not in the same way he loved Rachel. He was in love with Rachel, but he cared about Quinn a lot. She was his first real love. One didn't ever really stop caring about their first. He never stopped wanting what was best for her.

"I appreciate that, Finn. I know you feel lost and unsure, but time will change that. It'll get better. If there's one thing in life I learned, it's that life doesn't always suck. There's a way out," she replied with a smile. "I know you'll get everything figured out."

She placed her hand on his knee to comfort him, but he took it as she was making a move on him, and he leaned in. His lips graced hers for a moment before he realized what he had done, and he froze, waiting for her to get mad. Only, the outburst never came. Instead, her hands and found their way to his hair, his neck, pulling him towards her.

It was the alcohol, Quinn knew. They both had had way too much to drink. Both were beyond vulnerable, having just spilled their guts to the other. They needed comfort. Comfort the other was willing to give. Quinn knew Finn would be gone in the morning, that this was a mistake she'd regret later. She knew Finn would probably be thinking of Rachel the whole time, but she wasn't thinking straight. She didn't care right now. She just wanted to be loved, if only for the next hour. She wanted to feel wanted.

As they discarded their clothes, Finn wondered what Rachel was doing. Would he always think of her? When would it get easier? Could he let her go? He didn't think so, but he wondered if this was the first step. He'd go back to base tomorrow and hope that he could keep his mind on the important tasks at hand. Rachel had moved on. It was time he did, too.

Present Day
Finn awoke in a cold sweat. Staring up at the ceiling, he tried to calm himself down. It was just a dream brought on by the memories Quinn's death had given him. It didn't mean anything. It was a mistake. He never meant to hurt anyone. Hell, he never thought he'd be able to get back together with Rachel. But, he had. They had worked everything out. He had just never told Rachel about it because it wasn't important. She didn't talk about hooking up with Brody, and he didn't talk about hooking up with whom he did.

Now, he wished he had. It was harder now, bigger. The lie of omission made worse by his silence. He rolled over and looked at Rachel, who was breathing deeply with sleep. She was the best thing that had ever happened to him. He moved her hair out of her face so he could stare at her features more. Would she be able to understand that he never meant for any of this to happen, that he didn't say anything because he hadn't wanted to hurt her?

Suddenly, Rachel's eyes fluttered open. When she caught the look in his eyes, her smile faded. "Finn, is everything okay?" she asked, placing a hand on his cheek. She searched his eyes for the answers he wasn't willing to give.

He pulled her close to himself. "I'm fine."

He was turning into a liar.

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