Serena wasn't sure how she managed to get through the past few days. It had been a blur of sitting by her daughter's beside, going home occasionally to get a change of clothes and shovelling down half a sandwich or so when she thought about it. Seeing as though Hanssen practically forced her to take compassionate leave until her daughter was fully recovered, the only time she saw her office was when she popped up in the odd half an hour or so she got spare when her daughter was sleeping to see Ric and Michael. As much as she loved Ric, she still found Michael had been her favourite big-brother recently. Both of them had rallied around her while her daughter was recovering, but Michael was always there, checking she was OK. Whenever she popped in her office in those precious few moments, Michael had a 6th sense and always appeared at about roughly 5 minutes after her. And this time was no different, as she sat in her office talking to Ric.
"-yeah, so she's doing great, should be back home by the end of the we-" She glanced up when the door opened. Michael stood there, 3 coffees in hand.
"Thought I'd make sure the best two people in this hospital apart from myself are well-hydrated," He grinned, passing around the coffees. "And an extra special treat for my baby Rena," He winked, producing a slightly-crumpled, half-eaten chocolate bar and handing it to her with a flourish.
"It's half eaten," She shook her head in mock despair.
"What? I was hungry and I did carry the coffees all the way here!"
"Would you like a medal?" She asked sarcastically, and sighed when he nodded earnestly. "All you blokes think you can just sit on your arses all day!"
"Well, just for that you can't have the other half," He retorted childishly, pulling it out of her reach. However, Serena was suffering from a serious lack of sugar and would have given her right arm for half a chocolate bar at that moment in time, even if it did have Michael's slobber all over it.
"I'm sorry Michael," She smiled sweetly. "You are my bestest friend ever,"
He pretended to think this over for a while before finally delivering his verdict. "Ok, I'll give it to you as long as you say 'Michael, you are the best person ever and I don't know what I would do without you'!" She sighed irritably, not wanting to have to suffer this public humiliation.
"Michael," She reluctantly parroted. "You are the bestest person ever and I don't know where I would be without you,"
"Excellent," He grinned, pressing it into her hand. Serena glared at it in annoyance, wondering whether it had been worth it after all. Deciding she had better check to see if it was worth it, she took a bite and enjoyed the rush of sugar that exploded in her.
"Thank you," She grinned thankfully.
"That's ok, you look like you need it," Michael replied.
"Oh, jeez, thanks Michael, you make me feel really great about myself," She sighed irritably, chucking the now-empty wrapper in the bin. "Remind me, what was it that nurse from neurology said? 'Oh, Michaels so sweet and charming. He's like God's Gift to us women',"
"And I am thank you," Michael replied defensively. "I bet I could even seduce the might Mrs Beauchamp," Ric spluttered while Serena looked at Michael disbelievingly. She'd only known Connie for a few days but even she couldn't see a man-eater like Connie with Michael. "Don't look at me like that, I could!"
"From what I hear, every other bugga has!" Serena grinned. "Not much of a challenge!"
"True, thing to remember with Connie is, if it moves, she tries to shag it!" Ric, oblivious to his fellow consultants, squirmed uncomfortably in his seat for a split second.
"I'm curious now, though. Give me your best chat-up line," Serena dared, a dangerous glint in her eye. Michael thought about this proposal for a few moments before nodding.
"Go for it," Serena grinned. Michael whipped his expensive-looking jacket off and held it out to her.
"Feel it," He demanded. Serena glanced at it suspiciously before gingerly reaching out her index finger to touch it. "That," Michael grinned triumphantly. "Is boyfriend material," Ric chuckled loudly and Serena threw her head in her hands, laughing loudly.
"If you don't mind my saying, Mr Spence, I've heard quite a few lines like that in my time. But that was genuinely something else." A voice said from the door. They all turned to see a familiar tall figure standing at the doorway, a slightly amused look on his face.
"Thanks," Michael said cockily, throwing a triumphant look at Serena. Serena rolled her eyes in despair before smiling at Hanssen.
"Can we help you at all, Mr Hanssen?"
"Yes, Ms Campbell, a word if you will," Serena nodded before standing up and following him out of the office. She found it difficult to keep up with him as his massive strides left everyone in his wake. He finally paused outside and empty room and pushed it open, gesturing for her to go first. He followed, shutting the door behind them.
"I...er…you… left this," He said awkwardly, pulling something out of his pocket. Serena immediately recognised the glint of gold. "This morning,"
"Oh, thanks," She smiled, reaching out to receive her necklace. But he kept it out of her reach.
"Would you like me to-" He asked. Serena nodded and turned her back to him. He moved forward until he was very close, almost touching. He very slowly placed her necklace on her and did up the clasp. When he had done it up, he gently placed his hands on her waist. She smiled and turned in his arms so she was facing him.
"Thank you," She whispered. He smiled before pressing a soft kiss on her lips.
"I was going to go and see Eleanor to make sure everything is in order for her discharge in the next few days," He informed her.
"I was going to go down soon anyway so I'll come with you," She replied. He nodded and they proceeded to head to the lift and then finally arriving outside her daughter's room. Serena entered first followed by Hanssen.
"Are you ok, darling?" Serena asked, sitting in the bed-side chair.
"Yeah, although Molly's just put on Facebook that she and Kieran have split up. Apparently he kept eying up the lady at the ticket booth when they went to the cinema last night so she chucked him. She's pretty devastated so I've been texting her. She said she swore he was 'The One' and her soul-mate," Serena had to bite her lip to stop herself from bursting out laughing and the corners of Hanssen's mouth twitched, the only sign of his amusement.
"I suggest you tell your friend that she will soon get over him," Hanssen informed her.
"No!" Eleanor insisted earnestly. "She said she loved him and she'll never recover!" Hanssen smirked.
"That's until the next Taylor Launter look-alike comes strolling around the corner," Serena sighed. "Tell her she needs the broken-heart prescription. Tell her to change into her PJ's, put Grease on, grab a massive tub of Ben and Jerry's and cry for a bit. She'll soon feel much better,"
"And to cuddle up with that long-lost favourite teddy bear," Hanssen added. Serena and Eleanor looked at him strangely. "Everyone has a favourite teddy bear from their childhood. And I always found the best thing to do was to cuddle up with them for the night whenever you need to feel better."
Serena couldn't stop a wicked grin cross her face. "You? A cuddly toy?"
"Yes, what were you expecting?"
"I don't know, a stethoscope and the latest textbook on medicine?"
"I was very fond of Mr Marshmallow thank you," He protested slightly.
"Mr Marshmallow?" She burst into peals of laughter.
"Something funny?" He asked stiffly.
"No, not at all," She replied sarcastically.
"Do you remember Spoogles mum?" Serena sighed in annoyance.
"That thing haunted me from the day I bought it," She shivered at the memory of it.
"I'd love a ted called Mr Marshmallow though!" Eleanor grinned.
"Thank you," Hanssen smirked triumphantly. "At least one of you appreciates my exquisite taste of names," Serena shook her head with a smirk.
"Does he still live with you, Mr Marshmallow?" She asked innocently.
"He has pride of place on the end of my bed thank you," He replied smartly. "And if you continue to insult him I'm afraid I may have to inform him of your incompetence,"
"Ooh – I'm scared," She replied sarcastically as the door opened.
"Do you have a long-lost cuddly teddy from your childhood, Mrs Beauchamp?" Eleanor asked, recognising the woman who had just entered.
"No, I never saw the point in them," She replied smartly.
"What are you here?" Serena asked, eyeing her suspiciously.
"Nice to see you too," She smiled wickedly.
"I must admit to being the guilty party this time, Ms Campbell. I asked Mrs Beauchamp to come and check everything's fine cardio-wise with Eleanor seeing as though her injuries were GS and Cardio." Hanssen admitted.
"Couldn't Elliot come?" Serena asked quickly. "Jac?"
"No," Connie replied firmly. "Now, I must get on with it as some of us do have a ward to run," She pulled the stethoscope from around her neck and proceeded to examine Eleanor. A serious expression crossed her face as she listened intently to the sound of Eleanor's heartbeat through her stethoscope.
"Is everything ok?" Eleanor asked, taking in Connie's expression which wouldn't have looked out of place at a funeral.
"Er…yeah!" She replied, trying and failing to put a reassuring smile on her face. But everyone in the room could see she was far from convinced. "Notes," She demanded, holding out a hand. Hanssen reluctantly passed them to her, not use to doing things on command. Her face grew all the more grave as she flicked through the pages containing valuable information. She closed the notes and placed them in their allocated slot at the end of her bed. "Thank you," She smiled her usual exit to Eleanor, swinging her stethoscope back around her neck. She turned to the door and called sternly over her shoulder. "Mr Hanssen, a word if you will." He inclined his head before unfolding himself from his chair. Serena watched Hanssen follow Connie out of the room, a feeling of dread spreading through her.
"What's going on?" Eleanor asked. She was trying to be brave, acting as if she didn't care, but Serena could see right through her.
"Nothing serious. I'm sure," She smiled a smile which didn't quite reach her eyes. "You don't need to be scared, darling." She assured her, gently placing her over her daughters.
"I'm not!"
"It's a mother's prerogative to nag, whine and be insufferable. But it's also a mother's prerogative to know exactly what their children are feeling." She said firmly, squeezing her hand.
"I'm not scared!" Eleanor half-heartedly protested, but didn't bat away her mums hand and brush off her concerns as fiercely as Serena had expected.
"Good," She realised as much as she was trying to reassure her daughter, she was also trying to fight away the venomous whisper in the back of her mind telling her that she had no clue why Connie had rushed off for an urgent conversation with Hanssen. Serena sat in deep thought, the doctor in her becoming dominant as she ticked off a mental list in her mind of the possible things that could be wrong with her daughter. Eleanor was typing single-handedly on her phone – she still didn't quite have the heart to pull her hand out of her mum's grip – while fighting with the internal battle going on in her mind. 'Are you sure everything's fine?'…'don't be silly, Mrs Beauchamp said you were fine'…'Well, she would, she's only being nice, part of the job'…'No, she would lie would she?'…'Would she? Would she? Are you sure?'
Her mind was drawn out of this battle when Serena stood up.
"I'm getting a coffee," She answered the unasked question that was about to roll off of her daughters tongue. "Want anything?"
"Mmm… I might just try a large hot chocolate with extra cream and marshmallows," She sighed melodramatically as if it was a massive struggle to try and fight down a large hot chocolate with extra cream and marshmallows.
"Are you sure that's all?" Serena asked, her voice dripping with fond sarcasm.
"Well, if a chocolate bar is going, I won't say no. But I don't want to push you," Serena rolled her eyes before pressing a soft hiss on Eleanor's forehead.
"I love you mum," She said suddenly. The genuine care in her voice took Serena by surprise. Her daughter had certainly taken on the stroppy-and-distant-teenager role recently. The late nights, the chat-back, the short, distance response of 'yeah, im fine' when Serena asked about her welfare, or the 'same old' when she asked about her day, the secret alcohol, the 'Jeez, mum, I'm doing coursework' When Serena asked what she was doing on her laptop when she knew it would be facebook, twitter or any other of these sorts of things teenagers were addicted to these days.
"I love you too, sweetheart." She whispered, trying to fight back the tears. She wasn't exactly sure why she was almost crying, Eleanor was fine and about to make a full recovery. But something about almost losing her made her realise something… Don't cry, not in front of Eleanor She berated herself. She'd always tried to stay strong in front of her daughter, even when she was divorcing her ex-husband. She'd always shown a façade of being indestructible. No one could hurt or damage Serena Campbell in anyway, not while her daughter was there anyway. Of course, as soon as her back was turned, Serena curled up in front of the TV, eating her salary away on Chinese and drinking it away on all the wine her liver could take in one night. But as far as Eleanor was concerned, her mum was strong and relentless and Serena would keep that for as long as she could. But something about near-death experiences always put one's life into perspective. Clearing her throat, she straightened up and headed to the door. Pulling it open, she stepped onto the ward and immediately noticed a familiar, lean figure in a very fiery conversation with the woman next to him as they both pondered and poured over the scans attached to the wall in front of them. Immediately knowing what they were talking about, hurried over, desperate to know what was going on with her daughter. Connie looked stricken when she saw Serena approach and she quickly nudged Hanssen who in turn looked uncomfortable with Serena's presence.
"Tell me, I'm a big girl I can take it," She said, her voice reducing to a dangerously soft whisper, a menacing glint in her eye, daring them to disobey her.
"Serena, Connie thinks Eleanor has-" He reeled off some medical-sounding name that Serena hadn't heard of, seeing as though she wasn't a cardio surgeon.
"She has a right to know," Hanssen defended himself, taking in Connie's stony glare, before Connie got the chance to berate him.
"Mr Hanssen believes I'm wrong-"
"I didn't say that did I? I said it's a rare diagnosis and we need a second opinion. Maybe get Elliot come and take a look-"
"That's ironic coming from you! If it wasn't for me fighting tooth and nail, Elliot wouldn't have a job. Neither would Ric!"
"And if it wasn't for me, Ric wouldn't have his life, would he?" Hanssen hissed sharply. Connie and Hanssen both fell into a menacing silence, glaring icily at each other. "Call Elliot," He said in his most commanding voice before turning on his heel and striding off. Connie and Serena watched as he made his way through the ward, his long and purposeful strides leaving all his colleagues in his wake. Anyone who tried to make conversation with him was soon cut off as he just simply carried on striding through the ward, the speed of his strides sending out the message of 'Ah, doctor or nurse so-and-so, how lovely to see you. I'm really rather annoyed right now so I suggest you leave me alone as I'm not in the mood for pleasant chit-chat'. Connie cleared her throat when he disappeared from sight and pulled the scans from the wall. Her ego had been damaged, she was not use to someone having so much authority over her and showing her up in fellow consultants. Especially if that consultant was Serena Campbell.
"Shall we tell your daughter now?" She asked Serena, not fully making eye contact with her.
"What about Elliot…"
"I will get Elliot's opinion, but your daughter deserves to be kept in the loop. We can tell your daughter this is a diagnosis, but it just needs a second opinion," She suggested and Serena quickly searched it for a catch or flaw. But when she no obvious reason to object, she reluctantly nodded. She was very wary of Connie. In the few times they had come across each other, they had been very hostile, the witty comments relentless. They saw each other as potential threats, they both liked dominance and they both liked the idea of power…
"Serena, aren't you meant to be with Eleanor? Connie, what are you doing on Keller?" They both turned at the recognition of the smooth, calming voice.
"Ric," Connie smiled, her expression changing back to her usual, charming look. "I came to check out a patient. Eleanor."
"Yeah, and I was- Damn!" She sighed, remembering the reason she had left. "Getting hot chocolate and coffee. Want anything?" Ric accepted the offer of a coffee and Serena turned hesitantly to Connie.
"Er… yeah, a coffee will be lovely, thanks. I'll wait to tell her until you get back." She said before turning and starting a conversation with Ric. Serena set off in pursuit of the much needed caffeine. When Serena had completed her order, handing over a fistful of coins, about to receive her order when the-fresh-out-of-kindergarten servicewoman dropped her coffees everywhere, accepted the free refill, she turned to head back up to Keller when a man she couldn't have been happier to see appeared next to her as she waited for the lift.
"Elliot!" She smiled as the lift doors opened. He greeted her in response and when all the niceties had been observed, she glanced down at the take-out cartons in her hands.
"Oh, Elliot, I would have bought you a coffee had I known-"
"Don't worry," He smiled, pulling a bottle of something she could only guess was a kind of juice out of his briefcase. "Connie's got me on these. Absolutely pointless, won't do anything for me or my heart!" He said bitterly, opening it up and taking a sniff. His face contorted into a look of disgust. "I've lost count of the amount of these one can leave on a bus on the way to work!" The doors opened on Darwin level but Serena stopped Elliot leaving, explaining the whole situation. Serena smiled gratefully when he agreed to come and promised him as many coffees and cakes as he could manage when Connie had her back turned. They reached the ward and Connie immediately launched into a description of the whole situation when she spotted Elliot. Serena handed the coffees (And large hot chocolate with extra cream and marshmallows) around but purposely kept Connie's until last. She was about to hand it to her but nodded in the direction of a distant corner. Surprised, she followed her to her the corner of the ward and Serena handed her the coffee.
"Reason why I couldn't receive my coffee in the middle of the ward?" She asked, taking a delicate sip and burning her tongue in the process.
"Why? Why did you want Eleanor to know?" Serena launched straight into the attack, unable to keep her curiosity at bay.
Connie was clearly taken aback by these questions, Serena had caught her when she was least expecting it. However, it didn't stop the answer that had already formed on her lips. "Because if I was in the same position, I would want my daughter to know exactly what was going on. Grace means the world to me and I'm sure it's the same for you." Serena stared in silence, shocked by this sudden display of…care. "When I was joint DOS with Hanssen, I had to put on my A-game at all times, he was – is - so sneaky, he can catch you out at any time. So, of course, double time here, less time with Grace. One evening I had yet again missed Grace's bedtime. Elliot came in to our office and had a go at me for staying. As much as I was annoyed at him for doing so, it took just that to get things in perspective for me. He said, 'You know, you'll wake up one day and she'll be eighteen. And you'll have missed it. The best years. The magic years. And she'll want to know where you were. What will you tell her? Go home, Connie'. After all these years I still remember it. And he was right. The last few years I've been with Grace have been the best of my life. What I'm trying to say is, children grow up, enjoy 'em why you can. We haven't got off to the best of starts have we?" Serena shook her head with a smirk. Connie extended a hand forward.
"Is this the start of a beautiful friendship?" Serena asked.
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," Connie said, arching a beautifully-manicured eyebrow. Serena rolled her eyes but accepted her hand anyway. Connie looked up when Elliot began to call her.
"If you'll excuse me," She smiled before hurrying off. Serena stayed for a while, in deep thought. Connie's words echoed around her head, playing on her mind. Her daughter's accident had really put into perspective how she handled her life. Made her realise… did she pay as much attention to her daughter as she deserved, as she wanted, as she needed? Did the title 'consultant' rule her life? But it did come with the territory, how could she be a consultant and be the mum Eleanor needed? She couldn't. That was evident now. Connie got to spend more time with her daughter, but she had to… An option that hadn't even crossed Serena's mind before, leaving. But as she thought more and more about the situation she found herself in, she couldn't help but wonder whether it would be for the best. Her heart panged as she thought about leaving Michael, Jac, Ric, all the people she'd come to know and respect so much. The thought of leaving Henrik made her heart shatter. But that was just it, it was time her daughter came first, it was time her daughter became her priority.
Serena sat by her daughter's bedside and watched her sleep intently. It was surprising, how when one had their eyes closed it made them look so much more at peace with the world.
"Hello," She smiled as Eleanor started to stir.
"Hi mum!" She grinned, stretching and rolling onto her side. "Has Mrs Beauchamp worked out what's going on?"
"She thinks she got a diagnosis, but she's running it past Elliot first." Serena informed her. "Darling," She said, looking at her nervously.
"What is it? Am I dying?" Eleanor asked, her face stricken.
"What? No, no, I want to ask you something."
Relief flooded through Eleanor's face. "Fire away."
"Do I spend too much time here, do you think? Do I give you as much attention as you need?"
"Woah, what's this? Er… I dunno,"
"Come on, seriously, do I give you as much attention as you need?" Eleanor saw immediately that Serena wasn't messing around and sighed. Glancing nervously at her mum, she slowly shook her head. Serena made her decision there and then.
"I'm resigning." She smiled, looking determinedly into her daughters eyes.
"Wait, what? No, wait, huh? Why? You spent your whole life becoming a consultant."
"I know. But my whole life is you, sweetheart. I realised now, I'm going to give you the attention you deserve form now on, I've put this place first for too long."
"So, we just… pack up and go?"
Serena nodded. "You should be discharged soon and then we go. Spend some time together, get to know each other again, fancy it?" Eleanor stared at her mum for a while, wondering whether she was joking or not. When she finally concluded she was being serious, she nodded.
"Great, I-" She was cut off when the door opened. Elliot and Connie stepped in and it looked serious.
"It was as I suspected." Connie said gravely. "I've already run you through the options earlier, so you cans stay here another couple of days or go home this afternoon and go on the waiting list for a few weeks."
"Should we take you home and go on the waiting list?" Serena asked Eleanor, who nodded in response.
"Are you sure?"
"Yep," Eleanor confirmed her decision.
"Excellent, so, you can be discharged this afternoon." She smiled, said her goodbyes and followed Elliot out.
"Are you sure you want to do this mum?" Eleanor asked when they were once again alone.
"If you are?"
"Of course."
Serena took a deep breath and smiled. "Right, we'll I've got to go and tell some stuck-up arses to stick their job." She smiled, heading to the door. "I'll be back."
In her office, Serena sat triumphantly in her chair, a broad grin spread on her face. She felt a lot better after telling Cunningham to 'stick his job where the sun don't shine'. Now came the sticky, emotion part Serena could never do. Goodbyes.
She glanced around at the familiar surroundings of AAU she had got to know so well. She had been furious when she had been banished to AAU by Hanssen by as she looked back on it now, she was glad she had been put here, otherwise she'd have never got to have known Michael beyond his cocky, arrogant exterior. She headed straight to his office, not wanting to mull on memories.
"Well, well, Serena, I notice the charm of AAU couldn't keep you away for long. It gets under your skin." He grinned from his desk as she pushed the door open. She looked over at the desk that still hadn't been moved since she'd occupied it.
"It was like hell, being trapped here with you." She laughed fondly, trying to fight back the tears as she thought about what she was going to say.
"Was I that bad?" He asked, looking crestfallen. She smiled sadly before she shook her head with an involuntary sob. He immediately jumped up and pulled her into his strong arms.
"Rena, what is it, huh? What's up?" She rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes.
"Nothing. Just promise me something, yeah?"
"Depends," He whispered. "I don't do sexual activities for anything less than a fiver." And she could almost see the cheeky grin spreading on her face.
"Promise me you'll stay Michael Spence. The man I want to throttle and shove into a shallow grave somewhere, but the man I also love as a big brother."
"I promise. But what's bought on all this emotion, huh?" She couldn't bare the genuine care and concern in his voice. Why was it so much harder to deal with people hating you than people caring for you when you have spent so much of your life relying on yourself?
"Nothing," She smiled, reluctantly pulling out of his arms. "Just don't want you to change." She gently pressed a soft kiss onto his cheek and he walked her to his office door.
"I love you too," He smiled, pulling the door open for her. "As a younger sister I want to protect from everything bad." That was it, she had to go straight away. She went to swiftly exit from his office, but Michael grabbed her. "You never change, Serena Campbell, ok?" He pressed a kiss to her forehead before gently stroking her cheek, his thumb running along her cheekbone. "My baby Rena," He smiled fondly and the tears welled up inside of her again. She had to wrench her gaze away from him and quickly rush out of his office as the tears fell thickly down her cheeks.
She couldn't bare to say goodbye to everyone. She'd done Michael now, but there was one sweet nurse she couldn't go without saying bye too.
"Chantelle," She called, seeing the familiar blonde hair. Chantelle paused and smiled at Serena.
"Hi Ms Campbell. What can I do for you?"
"I just wanted to say something. I'm leaving, resigning, to spend more time with Eleanor, and I just wanted to say sorry if I made your life hell while I was here." Serena inwardly cringed at what she said – she really was crap at goodbyes. Chantelle's face fell as she took in what she said.
"Don't be silly, Ms Campbell, you're one of us now. Part of the big, community family here and we will miss you," She said in her sing-song voice, one of her standard, mega-watt smiled beaming on her face. Something about her words and the sweet, innocent cupcake that was Chantelle made an unwanted lump form in the back of Serena's throat, stopping the words she wanted to say come out. She finally managed 3 words, 2 of which aren't not usually in Serena's dictionary.
"Thank you, Chantelle," She smiled, before pulling Chantelle into a massive hug. Chantelle responded, wrapping her comforting arms around Serena, silently letting her know she and the rest of the hospital were always there for her. She wasn't sure how she had managed it, but without even noticing it, every person in the hospital had somehow become her friend. She knew this would be, by far, one of the worst goodbyes she'd ever had to deal with. And as much of a Goddess as Serena was, goodbyes weren't her strong point. Jac, Elliot, Ric, Chantelle, Malick, Chrissie, even Connie and especially Michael. She shared a bond with each of these people and it would break her heart to say goodbye to any of them, from Michael, cocky, charming and arrogant but her best friend almost to his polar opposite Jac, which was more of a bond or mutual respect than a friendship. But of course… Henrik Hanssen. Serena felt her heart break into a thousand pieces just thinking about it. The comfort she had once found in Chantelle's arms disappeared as she realised that she would have to pull away soon and walk out of Holby City Hospital without even a glance over her shoulder.
"Don't cry, Ms Campbell," Chantelle soothed, gently wiping Serena's tears as they fell. "Serena – we are all here for you and wish you the best of luck in the future. You are so strong and you'll be absolutely fine, you always are."
"Oh, Chantelle," Serena sighed, choking on her tears. Chantelle's innocent face suddenly fell.
"Ms Campbell, I didn't get the chance to organize a leaving drink!" She sighed, upset showing on her face.
Serena laughed not unkindly at Chantelle's thought process. She wished the biggest worry on her mind was not having a leaving drink. "Chantelle, I hate goodbyes, can't do it. How about you all go out tonight in memory of me, huh? I would prefer that." She started rummaging through her bag until she found her purse that had been buried at the bottom somewhere in the past few days. Finally locating it, she pulled it out and opened it up. She pulled two £20 notes out and handed them to Chantelle.
"No," She said firmly. "We don't need your money, Ms Campbell."
"Oh, Chantelle, please take it. Call it my legacy if you will." Chantelle sighed and reluctantly accepted the money thrust upon her.
"Thank you," She smiled.
"Chantelle – you are beautiful in your special way. Never let anyone tell you any different and you're the best flipping nurse I've ever worked with so don't ever change for anyone, Ok? Promise me, Chantelle?" She begged, needing this slight bit of comfort before she could bare to part.
"I promise," She said firmly, unable to stop the huge tears splash down her face. "I'll miss you, Ms Campbell."
Serena remained silent, the tears choking her so she as physically unable to speak. "Come here," She grinned, pulling Chantelle into another tight cuddle. It was strange, she somehow felt a strange sense of protection over Chantelle at that moment, a motherly instinct to protect the innocent woman before her. "One last thing Chantelle, look after yourself won't you?" Chantelle delicately wiped her tears with a nod. "Stay strong," She pressed a soft kiss into the top of Chantelle's head before turning away from her. Never look back. With the deepest sigh, Serena started to walk towards her office without glancing back…
Hanssen sat at his desk, working his way through the piles of paperwork in front of him. All the piles of folders were in equal sizes and spaced equally apart. Every now and again, he would move the folders slightly to his liking, and it was during one of these OCD-ridden moments he noticed a folded piece of paper with his name printed on it which he could have sworn he had never seen before. Unfolding it, he felt his heart sink as he scanned over the signature before reading through the contents:
Henrik,I've written and rewritten this but I still can't seem to
find the right words. But I'm going to try and say it
anyway.I'm so sorry I couldn't talk to you face-to-face,it's just
Im not good at goodbyes. But then again, who is? I knew if I
did I would have been to much of a coward to go.
I am resigning, I don't have a choice. I can't be a mum to
Eleanor in between running to Holby to play consultant. Both
of these roles need a whole lot of undivided attention that
I just can't give them anymore. I put my work before my
daughter for too long, and I can't believe it took her being
on death's door for me to realise how often I have put her
second when she should be first.I love you, and I know no matter how far I go, I will never
be able to stop loving you, not really. But my priority has
to be Eleanor and I need you to understand. I've missed most
of her life and I can't miss another minute. She needs and
deserves her mum to be there for her. Remember, no matter what anyone says, you're the best man
for this job. No more swanning off to Sweden, ok? I won't be
there to send Jac after you. This hospital needs you, so
don't change. Stay the same Henrik Hanssen I love and care
for. Don't run from your demons, stay and face up to them.
Running is only a short term fix.I have to go now. I'll miss you every single day. You're a
strong man and you can do anything you put your mind to,
trust me.Take care, Henrik, and adjö så länge,
Yours always,
Serena