Disclaimer – I don't own Artemis Fowl

Chapter 6

We sat in the three chairs Mr. Guiney had arranged in a little semi circle around his desk. Mr. Guiney sat at his desk and stared us down for a couple of minutes. I fidgeted in my seat; Artemis checked his watch and Richard yawned.

"Artemis and Callum, I've decided to give you both a detention," Mr. Guiney said. "Richard, due to your history of skipping classes, getting into fights and general bad behavior, you've been suspended for two weeks."

"Not fair," Richard yelled.

"But sir," I whined.

"I wasn't even involved in their fight, I was merely the victim," Artemis said.

"Quiet," Mr. Guiney said. "Richard, your father will be here in a couple of minutes to pick you up. Please wait outside. Artemis, Callum, go back to class. I will be calling your parents to let them know what has happened."

Artemis and I left the office and began walking to our classes. Artemis had ditched the blood-soaked tissue and his nose had already started to bruise.

"So what happened between you and Richard?" I asked. "I thought you two were a couple now."

"We were never a couple," Artemis said. "He kissed me without my permission. After class I expressed my displeasure and he punched me. Then you appeared."

That bastard. At least I hadn't punched Artemis. Although what I had done was pretty bad.

"By the way, I'm sorry about what happened that night. You know…" I trailed off. Artemis didn't say anything so I continued. "It was completely inappropriate. I should've given up after you refused to go out with me. I'm such an idiot, I'll completely understand if you never forgive me. But it won't happen again, I swear! If it does, which it won't, feel free to cut off my pe-"

"Stop it," Artemis interrupted my rambling. "I'm not planning to cut off anything."

"Oh, good," I said. "I haven't even gotten round to using it yet."

Artemis turned to look at me and I blushed, realizing what I'd just said. I was about to begin another long, rambled apology when classical music began to play from inside Artemis' pocket.

"Excuse me," Artemis said, and pulled out a mobile phone. He answered the phone and began talking to whoever was on the other side of the phone. I was only able to hear Artemis' side of the conversation.

"Hello? Yes, that's true. I'd prefer it if they didn't hear about the incident. No doubt they'll worry, mother especially. I'm fine and I don't plan on having a repeat of today. No, I promised mother I wouldn't bring you down to the school anymore. Someone complained about me terrorizing the other students. Completely ridiculous, of course. Yes, I assure you, I am fine. Goodbye, old friend."

He hung up and put away his phone.

"Who was that?" I asked.

"My bodyguard," he replied.

"Your bodyguard?" I cried.

"Yes," Artemis said. "He heard about what happened and was concerned."

"Your bodyguard," I repeated faintly.

"Are you quite alright?" Artemis asked.

No, I wasn't alright. I'd dated boys before and nearly all of them had parents who insisted on meeting me. Cue the awkward concerned parent questions. I'd always thought dads who were having trouble accepting that their sons were dating a dude were bad, but a bodyguard? At least I wasn't interested in Artemis like that anymore? Right? Right?

Artemis stopped outside of a door. "This is my class," he said.

"Alright," I said. "See you later."

I turned to walk away and Artemis grabbed my arm. I turned back to him and his grip on my arm tightened slightly. "Thank you," he said.

He let go and walked into the classroom. I watched him till the door closed, hiding him from view, before continuing back to class, a huge grin on my face.

A/N – Another update. Sorry if this chapter is kind of boring and pointless.