Chapter 8

Ok, so maybe going to Artemis' room every Thursday night for tutoring wasn't what Joshua had in mind when he told me to back off a bit. But Artemis offered and wouldn't it be a bit rude for me to refuse him, when he's willing to give up some of his private time for me? So, my grades in math were steadily improving and I liked to believe that Artemis and I were beginning to become friends.

When we weren't busy working out equations, we talked. Or rather, Artemis asked me a series of questions ranging from completely mundane to deeply personal. Some I decided were a bit too personal, but he didn't seem to mind when I didn't give him a completely honest answer or just flat out refused to answer. I kind of felt like he was trying to figure something out and I was more than willing to help.

Getting to know Artemis was a bit difficult. He had a constant smug air about him, the kind that made me feel like he was keeping a pretty huge secret from me. This was fine, really. We weren't that close, although I wished that we were, and it was completely within his right to have secrets. I even had few secrets of my own. For example, my Mum was never going to find out what really happened to her favorite set of good china, no matter how many times she interrogated me.

Note to self, glass plates do not make good Frisbees.

I never believed that Artemis would talk to me or treat me like someone worthy of his attention outside of our little tutoring sessions. And he didn't, until one day during lunch break...

"What is it?" Scott asked, gingerly poking at the slimy thing in front of him.

"I think it's spaghetti," I said.

"Sure as hell doesn't look like spaghetti," Scott said. "Or smell like it. I'm willing to bet it doesn't taste like it either."

Our conversation was interrupted as another plate of spaghetti was dumped down at our table and Artemis sat down across from me. Scott stared at Artemis then turned to me and mouthed, "What the hell?"

"Hey, uh, Artemis," I said. "Why are you...?"

"Sitting with you?"

"Yeah, that."

Artemis shrugged his shoulders. "All the tables are being used," he said. "Usually I get here early enough to have a table to myself but today I was sidetracked."

"That doesn't explain why you're sitting with us," I said.

"Perhaps I'd rather sit with you two, then with the rest of the idiots at this school," Artemis said.

Another tray slammed down onto the table, spraying us with bits of meat and sauce. I looked up to see that it was Joshua who had slammed the tray of food down. The look on his face was murderous.

"What the hell is he doing here?" Joshua demanded, gesturing to Artemis.

"Is there a problem?" Artemis asked.

"Yeah, there is," Joshua said. "Do you remember my sister?"

Artemis studied Joshua's face for a few seconds, and then nodded.

"Jessica. You both have a very similar bone structure," Artemis said. "Please tell me this doesn't have anything to do with that time she asked me out."

"Bad luck, cause it has everything to do with that," Joshua said.

"Do you honestly expect me to date your sister just because she is related to you?" Artemis snapped. "I was not interested, and now you're pulling the overprotective big brother act. Wouldn't you rather that she is turned down by someone, then to be in a meaningless relationship?"

"I'm not angry because you turned her down," Joshua said. "I just think you could've been a bit easier on her."

"I did go easy on her," Artemis said.

"You made her cry."

A strange look passed over Artemis' face, but it was gone before I could figure out what it meant.

"Is that so?" he asked.

"Yeah, it is," Joshua said.

The silence that followed was uncomfortable and tense and seemed seemed to stretch on forever. Artemis' lips were pressed tightly together as Joshua watched him. Finally, Artemis threw down his fork and returned Joshua's gaze.

"Could please tell your sister that I apologize for my reprehensible behaviour and let her know that I regret being so harsh when she asked me out," he said.

"I would tell her," Joshua said, after a moment of consideration, "but I want you to. Face to face."

"St. Bartleby's students are not allowed in St. Catherine's school," Artemis said. "Not since one of the students wound up pregnant and didn't know which one of her various boyfriends was the father."

I remembered that incident. Two guys, both from my science class, both were dating the same girl. After they finished being pissed with each other, they began to argue over the baby. They both insisted that there was no way in hell that they could be the father so it had to be the other. The girl would dress in the Bartleby uniform and come over and all three of them would have huge fights in the middle of the school hallways...

It was like a light bulb had suddenly popped into existence above my head.

"I've got an idea!"

And that is how all four of us ended up stuck in a closet, each wearing a St. Catherine's uniform which consisted of skirt, blouse, sweater, blazer and knee high socks. When I'd come up with the idea it had seemed foolproof. But now I had to admit that it was a pretty crappy plan. None of us could actually pass for girls, especially not me. At 6'3" I was the tallest of the group. Artemis could almost make the disguise work; from a distance and only if you squinted.

We all realized this when a teacher did a double take at the sight of us and turned to start asking questions. Although, Artemis had destined the plan as doomed to fail the very instant I had explained it.

Before the teacher could get to us we had run down a corridor, into an empty classroom, and then shut ourselves into a storage closet at the back of the room. Unfortunately the door had locked behind us.

"I miss maths," Scott said. "I've never been stuck in the closet with three guys in maths class."

Artemis was loudly ranting about simpletons with below average IQ, or something like that.

"If you're so smart," Joshua said, through gritted teeth, "then why don't you get us out of here."

"Very well," Artemis said. "I was hoping one of you three could prove to me that you aren't as dumb as you look, but it seems as though I will have to do all the thinking as usual."

Kurt turned to me and held out his hand. "Callum, I need to borrow a bobby pin."

Scott and Joshua stared at me and I felt my cheeks get warm as I blushed. "What are you talking about?" I laughed. "I don't carry bobby pins with me. That's ridiculous. Completely absurd!"

Artemis raised an eyebrow.

"Ok, fine," I said, and pulled a pin out of my pocket. Scott sniggered.

"Shut up," I told him. "So I care about making sure my hair looks nice. Whatever. It's no big deal."

There was a click and the closet door opened.

"Finally," Joshua said.

We decided to wait in the empty classroom while Joshua texted his sister to let her know where we were. I sat cross-legged on top of one of the desks and Artemis leaned against a wall, crossing his arms.

"I cannot believe I agreed to do this," he said.

Scott, who had sat down on the desk net to mine said, "I came for the girls. So far there has been a lack of lady folk, so today has been a great disappointment."

I rolled my eyes. Typical Scott, mind always on girls.

"Jessica's on her way," Joshua said. "She'll be here soon."

Only ten minutes had passed when a short, blonde girl, who I assumed was Jessica due to the eerie resemblance between her and Joshua, burst into the room.

"Josh, what the hell are you doing here and oh my god what are you wearing?" She did a double take when she saw Artemis. "Seriously, what is going on?"

"I'm here to apologize," Artemis said. "I have come to realize that perhaps I was a bit... harsh when you asked me onto a date."

"What are you talking about?" Jessica laughed. "Sure, you don't have the best personality, and you usually end up being rude and tactless even when you're not even trying to be mean... But I didn't think you were that bad. You could've been a lot worse."

"Jess, stop trying to make it seem less than it was," Joshua said. "He made you cry!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Jessica said. "I didn't cry."

"But your friend -"

"Let me guess, Mischia told you," Jessica said.

"Well yes, but -"

"I thought you would've figured this out by now," Jessica said, exasperated. "Mischia is a chronic liar. You can't trust a thing that comes out of her mouth. To be completely honest, I never wanted to go out with Artemis in the first place. One of my friends dared me to ask him out. No offence, Fowl, but you're really not my type."

"None taken," Artemis muttered.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to class. I have a huge test coming up next week and I've already wasted enough time here," she said.

There was a moment of silence after she left. Joshua looked embarrassed, his mouth hanging open slightly.

"Well, this turned out to be a complete waste of my time," Artemis said.

"I guess it's my turn to apologize," Joshua said. "No hard feelings?"

After a small moment of awkwardness, they shook hands.

"No hard feelings," Artemis agreed.

Touching moment over, I stood up from my seat on the desk and stretched out my arms.

"So, we can go back to school now?" I said. "Cause this place is kind of boring."

As we entered the grounds of St. Bartlebys, Scott leaned over to me and said, "You reckon I could convince the teachers to make skirts a regular part of the uniform? Cause the breeze between my legs is really refreshing. I could get used to this."

I laughed and pushed him away. "Could you do us all a favor, though," I said. "Next time you wear a skirt, put on some underwear as well. There are some things a guy doesn't need to see..."

A/N - So I'm pretty sure this is the longest chapter I've written so far and hopefully I'll keep writing chapters at this length. Please let me know what you think. Reviews are always greatly appreciated.