Returns
Author's note: I'm not very fond of this chapter myself, but I honestly don't know how I would change it so I'll post it anyway. Enjoy :)
Blaise hadn't even been away for a whole week, and maybe it was nothing but his imagination speaking, but Hogwarts seemed to have become even gloomier and more depressed looking since he last saw it. Since he couldn't apparate within the grounds he had to walk almost a kilometer to reach the castle and when finally looking up at it he didn't find the sight of it even the slightest welcoming.
It was still early, but the dark grey sky with the rain that kept falling down could have fooled anyone into thinking that it was already about to get dark. Not a single student could be spotted on the grounds. Blaise knew that Easter was a time when many chose to spend the holidays at school, but this year was obviously different. He guessed that many students wanted to go home to see their families and spend time with them while there was still... well, time.
And you? Who'd want to spend time with you? Not your mother, that's for sure...
Blaise was happy to reach the oak front doors leading into the castle, since trying to open them took his mind off everything that had to do with the mess that he was bound to call his "family".
Don't think about that.
Just like the grounds, the Entrance Hall was completely deserted and Blaise had to admit that it was slightly intimidating, feeling as if you were the only person inside the castle. Hell, even a glimpse of the poltergeist Peeves would have made him happy...
Taking one last look around, he turned left and walked with quick steps down the stairs, heading for the dungeons and the Slytherin common room. However, he didn't reach very far before he spotted someone coming towards him from the other end of the dim-lit corridor. As soon as Blaise realized who it was he stopped abruptly, feeling his heart starting to pound somewhat faster than usual.
He was not afraid of Severus Snape but the events of the year before were still fresh in his mind. The man had killed another wizard, and that wizard was not just anyone... That ought to count for something. And considering what he'd turned this school into, one could only guess that Snape had lost some of his common sense...
"Zabini..."
Snape interrupted his thoughts when speaking up and he was now standing only centimeters away form Blaise, slowly crossing his arms.
"Out for a mid day stroll... are we?"
Blaise swallowed but somehow managed to keep his gaze locked with the Headmaster's. He was a slytherin. He was a seventh year. Hell, he was best friends with Draco Malfoy who Snape had done his best to help the previous year.
He had nothing to fear.
"No Headmaster, I just got back to school actually"
While they both stood there silent, Snape obviously pondering over his answer, the thoughts kept spinning through Blaise's mind. What was Snape up to, running around in the dungeons? Didn't he have more important things to take care of, now that he was head of the school, than sneaking around in the corridors interrogating students?
"And how come you decided to return today and not Sunday like most of your classmates?"
Even though Blaise should have expected that very question, it caught him completely off guard. Despite having helped Draco, Blaise didn't trust Snape one bit and telling him the truth definitely wasn't an option. Besides, what would he, a death eater who hired people like Amycus and Alecto Carrow, say if he knew that he'd spent several days with the Weasleys?
"I guess I just wanted to see my friends, sir"
True. Even though Tracey was still in France and Draco at Malfoy Manor...
Snape's dark eyes buried into his, giving Blaise the feeling that he could see everything. That he knew everything. Every place he'd ever been, every person he'd ever seen, every feeling he'd ever felt... Then, a terrifying thought hit him and he heard Draco's voice inside his head:
Snape is really good at Legilimency, that's what he's been trying to teach me all summer...
If all that was true, which is probably was, Blaise was done. Snape would be able to see everything and he had absolutely nowhere to escape at the moment...
"Be careful, Zabini" The Headmaster's voice was low, serious. "I know you're blessed with common sense so use it"
Then, without another word and before Blaise had time to even think of what to say, he'd passed him by and disappeared down the corridor. Soon, a door slammed shut and Blaise knew that Snape had left the dungeons. Still, he wasn't able to move and for a short while he just stood there, staring at nothing in particular and feeling slightly numb from his latest encounter.
Be careful, Zabini. I know you're blessed with common sense so use it.
What on earth did that even mean?
Thinking that he didn't want to risk running into another teacher, Slughorn for instance, he continued down the corridor and soon reached the entrance to the Slytherin common room. But the thoughts of Severus Snape refused to leave his mind.
Come to think of it, this was the first time in months that Blaise had even seen him. Now that he didn't teach anymore, he seemed to spend most time up in his office. Dumbledore's office, where Ginny and her friends had tried to steal that sword... What would the old, white-bearded wizard say if he was still alive and found out about the current situation at his school?
Why do you care?
Blaise had never been a huge Dumbledore fan but he had never hated him, either. Surely he had sometimes gotten the feeling that Dumbledore favorised gryffindors, the poor and the weak but at least people had felt somewhat safe when he ran the school.
Now it was all chaos. And fear of being killed or losing someone you cared about.
He was happy to find the common room almost completely empty, apart from a couple of third years who sat close together in a corner, studying. They all eyed him curiously as he entered but Blaise ignored them and sat down in his favorite armchair, feeling his headache from a couple of days earlier return with full force.
He needed time to go through all this. He absentmindedly ran his fingers over the cut on his side, feeling it there under the fabric of his shirt. It had healed quickly and was almost like a scar now, soon to be gone. Just like everything that had happened to him this week.
What was she doing now?
"THANK GOD!"
Blaise had never heard Tracey roar like that before, and if he hadn't known her so well he probably would have shrunk in his seat. For she was now walking towards him, fists clenched by her sides. And she did not look happy. He gulped, standing up again.
Tracey stopped only when standing a couple of centimeters away from him, laughed in disbelief and held out her hands in exasperation, causing the group of third years to turn around in their seats once again.
"I don't even know where to begin!"
"How about you don't?" Blaise muttered but she interrupted him:
"Oh no, don't you dare try to tell me to mind my own business this time! Do you have any idea how worried I've been..."
But Blaise had stopped listening. Instead of paying attention to what sounded like a mother screaming at her child, he was surprised to find that he was actually happy to see Tracey acting this way. He'd never tell her, but knowing that she actually cared meant a lot. More than she probably knew.
"... and I've sent you at least 300 letters but I guess that it didn't cross your brilliant mind to bring that stupid owl of yours to wherever you went..."
This time, Blaise interrupted her:
"Are you done?" he asked, crossing his arms and raising his eyebrows at her.
Tracey opened her mouth, closed it again and then shook her head before hissing:
"Not even close"
"Well how about you give me a chance to explain myself..."
"OH PLEASE DO!"
She'd raised her voice again. The third years curious stares made Blaise feel extremely supervised and uncomfortable, not unlike this morning when Bill Weasley had spied on him and Ginny from the kitchen window at Shell Cottage.
Had that really happened this morning?
"Not here" he muttered under his breath, grabbing Tracey's arm. "Let's go somewhere quiet..."
But she pulled away.
"You are in no position to negotiate here, Blaise" she snapped. "Either you tell me everything now or..."
"Or what? It's not like you can live with not finding out"
He knew that he was right and judging from the angry glare she gave him she did, too. There was a long silence before Tracey finally snarled:
"Fine, we'll go somewhere else. But then I want to know everything, and if you leave any details out I swear I'll..."
"I won't" Blaise promised, leading her out of the Slytherin common room.
Whether he wanted to admit or not, he needed a friend. He needed to actually talk to and confess in someone who didn't automatically assume that all gryffindors were idiots.
He wanted someone to tell him what to do. No, he needed someone to tell him what to do.
And Tracey would listen. She wouldn't judge like Draco, Theo, Pansy and Daphne most likely would. Tracey would understand.
Right?
How do you make a time line haha
Thankfully, the astronomy tower was deserted. Since there were still two days left of the holidays no classes were held up here, but Blaise knew that he was not the only one who sometimes went here when feeling like he needed some alone time to think. Draco had been here countless of times, even though Blaise had never told him that he knew about it.
Now, Tracey closed the door behind them and turned around to face him. Blaise waited, feeling like it was best to let her speak first to not make her any angrier than necessary. She looked around the room, raising her eyebrows slightly.
"Charming" she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "I didn't know you enjoyed Astronomy classes so much that you come here even when we don't have to"
"It's a great place to think" he mumbled. "It's easy to find peace here, to remain calm..."
"And you think I'll need that for whatever you're about to tell me?"
Their gazes locked and Blaise shrugged slightly, silently wondering whether this was all a big mistake. What if she'd react just as his other friends surely would? What if she'd consider him completely mental?
"I thought you'd be back from France on Sunday" he said, mostly to break the tension in the small, circular shaped room.
"Well, if you'd read any of my letters you'd know that my father received an owl from the Ministry saying that he had to be back before the weekend" Tracey replied dryly. "So we left early. I apparated here this morning, for some reason thinking that you might actually be here. And I was right"
Another silence. Blaise looked straight at her, hoping that she could somehow see how honest his next words were:
"If I'd received any of your letters I would have read them and sent you replies. But I left home in a hurry and I couldn't bring my owl to..."
He drifted off. This was it. He'd been about to say "Shell Cottage", but figuring that those words probably meant nothing to Tracey he'd stopped himself last minute. However, "Ginny Weasley's brother's house" probably didn't sound any better...
"Why would you leave in a hurry?" Tracey's voice was full of curiosity now. "Did something happen?"
He didn't want to, but he'd already brought her up here after having promised that he'd tell her the whole story. And he'd keep his promise, and leave nothing out, even if it meant showing her what he himself could barely stand to look at.
"You could say that" he said quietly, slowly starting to un-botton his shirt.
Tracey looked surprised.
"What are you..."
But she fell completely silent when Blaise had removed his shirt and moved slightly closer to her so she'd be able to see the long cut on his side properly. She gasped.
"Oh Merlin, that looks..."
"Disgusting, I know" Blaise said bitterly.
"I was going to say 'painful', but I guess your definition works just fine, too" Tracey said, absentmindedly stretching out her hand to touch his bare skin.
Blaise pulled away quickly.
"Don't touch it" he said. "It still hurts quite bad from time to time"
"Still?" Tracey repeated, staring at him. "When did this happen?"
"Four days ago"
They both fell silent, apparently at a loss of words, before Tracey pointed out:
"You should have Madam Pomfrey take a look at that..."
"No"
"Blaise, it looks really scary..."
"It's already been taken care of" he replied shortly, thinking of the potion he'd been given during his first night at Shell Cottage.
They'd saved his life...
He put his shirt back on and while he was buttoning it up Tracey asked, her voice low:
"What happened?"
Blaise looked away from her, backing a few steps again to create some distance between the two of them. Also, he didn't want her to see his face so clearly. If she did, he might give away signs of weakness.
"My mother's new fiancée" he finally said, knowing it'd be easier once the hardest part was over. "He heard me say that I thought they should call off the wedding. He went completely mad..."
"And did this?"
Tracey nodded towards his shirt and even though the fabric shielded the cut it was still fresh in their minds, hanging over them both like a dark cloud full of rain.
"Yes"
Tracey shook her head in disbelief.
"And your mother?"
"She just stood there"
He clenched his jaw, crossed his arms and looked out the window without really seeing anything. He had to stay strong, even now. He couldn't lose control.
"She just stood there"
He didn't know why he said it twice, but he didn't have time to dwell on the fact for very long before Tracey sighed and silently put her hand on his arm. He couldn't bring himself to pull away.
"Blaise..."
But he didn't want to listen to people saying that they felt sorry for him, or even pitied him. It didn't help. He soon continued:
"Anyway, I had to get out of there as soon as possible. Otherwise he probably would have killed me..."
"Why didn't you just come to my place? You could have written me a letter and I'd come home in an instant"
Tracey's voice sounded slightly accusing and she looked almost disappointed, as if he'd let her down when not confiding in her immediately.
"Yes, I do know that" Blaise replied calmly. "And I also know that you would have asked your parents to help out and that you'd want to go straight back there and..."
"Yeah, you're bloody right I would!" Tracey exclaimed angrily. "He may be your mother's future husband but he has no right to do that to you! What do you think would have happened if you hadn't managed to get out of there?"
Blaise swallowed, his voice hard as he told her:
"I already told you, I'd most likely be dead and apparently that wouldn't bother my mother the slightest"
Tracey's face expression changed in an instant. At his words she paled, her green eyes widened and she opened and closed her mouth several times before starting:
"Blaise, you know I didn't mean... She loves you, I know she does..."
"There's no point discussing this, so I won't"
She pressed her lips together and it seemed like she badly wished to say something but forced herself not to. Eventually, she changed the subject:
"So if you didn't stay there, and if you didn't go to my place, where did you go?"
The silence seemed to last forever. Blaise, still staring out the window, eventually muttered something incoherent under his breath.
"What was that?" Tracey asked, furrowing.
Blaise took a deep breath and looked up at her before saying, his voice almost defiant:
"Bill Weasley's"
Tracey blinked. Swallowed. Opened her mouth, closed it again. Then, sighing heavily, she asked:
"You're serious, aren't you?"
"Oh no, because it'd be such a funny joke" Blaise said sarcastically, rolling his eyes at his friend. "Of course I'm serious!"
"Well..." Tracey said, obviously trying to find the right words. "I take it Ginny was there as well?"
Blaise nodded.
"She spent the holidays there"
"And you knew that? How?"
"I overheard a friend of hers telling Longbottom" Blaise muttered and, to stop Tracey from jumping to the wrong conclusions, added:
"And yes, I heard it by accident"
"So... Ginny Weasley and her brother nursed you back to health and let you stay with them until you were strong enough to apparate back to school?"
Blaise had to give his friend that she was good at putting two and two together, which made things a lot easier for him. He nodded again, thinking that there was no real point mentioning that Bill's french wife had also been there...
"Why didn't you just go to Malfoy's?"
Blaise rolled his eyes.
"His house is full of death eaters, it's their bloody head quarter! And when I lay there on the floor, Weasley's place literally just popped into my mind and I don't even know why..."
"Because you like her"
Blaise stopped speaking, feeling his heart starting to beat faster as he glared at his friend.
"I don't like..."
But now, Tracey even raised her voice and seemed determined to prove her point:
"Fine, then look me in the eye and tell me that nothing even remotely romantic happened between the two of you while you were staying with them!"
Without knowing how or why, the almost-kiss down by the beach immediately popped into Blaise's mind. How close they'd been standing, how soft her lips had looked, her eyes...
"I told you, didn't I?"
Blaise thoughts were interrupted by Tracey's words. However, he was surprised that she didn't sound even the slightest triumphant and it didn't seem like she wished to tease him. Instead, there was a trace of fear and annoyance in her voice and she soon added:
"Open your eyes, Blaise! Those feelings won't go away just because you don't talk about them. Honestly, of all places you could have gone you chose hers, that ought to count for something. And frankly it seems impossible for you two to stay away from each other..."
"It doesn't matter"
Tracey seemed too taken aback by his three words to continue and Blaise didn't blame her. He knew his voice was really low and that it sounded... broken and empty. Because he was out of ideas and hope.
Tracey stared at him.
"What do you mean it doesn't matter? Of course it matters!"
"Really?"
He could almost feel his own gaze burning with anger and tiredness, as he realized the truth in his own words. It didn't matter that Tracey didn't consider Ginny scum, as long as the rest of his world did.
"If it does, then tell me what to do. Tell me how to get out of this"
How to forget. How to always remember.
But Tracey just shook her head slowly, walking towards him to put her hand on his arm once more.
"You know it just doesn't work that way" she said softly. "Nobody else can help you this time. You simply have to choose, Blaise"
Between what? Friends? Family? Everything he'd been brought up to believe in?
How could he possibly do that?
Ginny's point of view
Ginny and the rest of her family sat in the kitchen at aunt Muriel's place, waiting for Bill and Fleur to arrive. Mrs Weasley had already placed the tasty looking cake with the words "HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRED AND GEORGE" on the table and Ginny was confused, seeing as Bill had promised her that he'd return with Fleur as soon as he'd returned to Shell Cottage after having brought Ginny here with the help of Side-Along apparation. It had been almost half an hour now and she couldn't shake off the feeling that something was wrong.
"They should be here by now"
She hadn't meant to speak those words out loud, since it was impossible to miss the worried glances that her parents already kept sending each other, but she couldn't help it. For a split second she wished that they were all back at the Burrow and had access to the clock with the many pointers, showing where each Weasley family member was at the moment. But then she remembered that they all pointed at "Mortal Peril" these days, so it wouldn't really have made any difference...
"Ginny, do you know what might have happened?"
Everybody's eyes turned to rest on Ginny at her father's question but she merely shook her head slowly, swallowing.
"No..."
Then, a certain thought hit her and her heart seemed to skip a beat. Was it possible, could it be, that Blaise had returned to Shell Cottage and that's what made it impossible for Bill and Fleur to leave? But no, it couldn't be. He wouldn't be able to find the location... But what if the memory charm went wrong?
Her thoughts were interrupted as something that looked like a bright light came soaring into the room, from nowhere in particular, and within seconds turned into a great wolf. Bill's Patronus had changed the night that he got bitten by Fenrir Greyback and this was the form Ginny knew it had taken. They all fell completely silent. The bright wolf opened its mouth to speak, Bill's voice filling the room:
"Fleur and I are fine, but we won't make it today. Something has come up. Don't worry mum, I will give you all more information soon. Happy birthday, Fred and George"
And then, the Patronus disappeared. For another few seconds, they all remained silent. Then, George burst out:
"Is that all?! No present? No card? No song?"
"This is not funny, George!" Mrs Weasley snapped, standing up and suddenly forgetting all about the twins' birthday. "What could have gone wrong? We should all go there now..."
But Mr Weasley stood up as well, grabbed his wife's arm and gently forced her to sit down again. Ginny was impressed to find that he managed to keep his voice perfectly calm when telling his wife:
"Molly, Bill is a grown up wizard. He told us to wait for him to get back to us, and so we will. You heard him yourself, he and Fleur are both all right"
Mrs Weasley looked like she wanted to oppose.
"But I... Well, he could..."
"Relax mum" Charlie said, patting her on the shoulder reassuringly. "I'm sure we'll know everything by tomorrow morn..."
"When I was young, back in the golden days, the spoiled youth had to take care of their problems on their own!" Aunt Muriel had a talent for always choosing the wrong moment to enter a conversation. "And by doing that they learned that things don't always go the way we plan and that sometimes you simply have to..."
"How about some cake, everybody?" Fred interrupted her, grinning at Ginny before he cut himself a piece. "I'm starving!"
They ate, talked and smiled but it was impossible not to feel the tension that never seemed to leave the room. The only one who seemed completely oblivious to everything that was going on was aunt Muriel who, after her third piece of cake and fifth glass of Sherry, pointed out to Ginny:
"By the way Ginevra, what on earth have you done to your hair? It's far too long for my liking..."
But Ginny was barely listening, seeing as the thoughts kept spinning through her head. What could have gone wrong back at Shell Cottage and what was Bill keeping from them?
How do you make a time line haha
Even when lying in bed that night, several hours later, Ginny couldn't stop thinking about her brother and sister-in-law. She knew that she couldn't go back to Shell Cottage, because nobody in her family would ever agree on apparating with her, but she desperately wanted to.
Bill and Fleur had let her stay with them for almost a week, they'd given Blaise food and a place to stay. They'd even saved his life and therefore, in some ways, saved her... She owed them. But then again, Bill had said that they were all right. He had trusted her when she told him that Blaise wasn't dangerous and so she had to trust him now.
Eventually, her thoughts wandered off to Blaise. Now that he wasn't here she had time to go through everything that had happened during the past couple of days. What, exactly, had happened with Pansy and Daphne? And how many girls had he ever slept with? Just the two of them? Five? Ten? Twenty? Perhaps he used them all as some kind of pain relief...
Ginny buried her face in her hands, wondering why she spent time thinking about this in the first place.
How do you make a time line haha
It was a bit surprising that when entering the Entrance Hall, despite everything that Snape had manage to turn Hogwarts into, Ginny felt good. After having spent almost three days at aunt Muriel's place it was like a relief being here. Like being home. She hated even thinking about what it had been like at King's Cross a couple of hours earlier; her parents had both been there to wave her off and her mother had been crying. She had still not heard anything from Bill and Fleur. Or Ron.
Ginny herself waited for a letter from Bill, keeping her eyes open for his owl all the time. She'd kill for a sign that they were still okay and for some information about what had really happened...
But the annoyance with her brother momentarily disappeared when Neville spoke up, his voice trembling slightly:
"Ginny..."
And then, before she had time to even think or properly react to what was happening, Luna was in her arms.
Author's note: Happy New Year! And please review, it motivates me to keep writing! :)