Undo Mistakes

"All the streets, where I walked alone
With nowhere to go, have come to an end."

Sum 41- With me

Ginny cursed under her breath as yet another student bumped into her on his way to dinner and she realized that she seemed to be the only one who wasn't heading towards the Great Hall. She couldn't possibly eat anything until she'd found Blaise.

There's no time to hate.

But right now, it seemed impossible. She'd been running around the castle like an idiot for almost half an hour, actually being lucky enough not to bump into someone she knew, looking everywhere for him. And yet he was nowhere to be found.

"Couldn't he be predictable, just for once?" Ginny muttered under her breath, speaking to no one in particular. "Stupid slytherin..."

It was true. Why did they always have to be so... mysterious and strange? Why couldn't she ever tell what Blaise Zabini might be thinking or planning to do next? It was really annoying, but also one of the many things that she liked about him...

Her thoughts were interrupted as she, for what seemed like the hundredth time that evening, reached the Entrance Hall and bumped right into someone.

"Oh, I'm sorry..." she started, but drifted off and raised her eyebrows as she found herself staring right back into Tracey's surprised looking eyes.

"You again" the slytherin stated, smiling slightly. "Any luck in finding Blaise?"

Ginny took a quick look around and made sure that none of Tracey's, or her own, friends were within earshot before she replied:

"No! I can't find him anywhere, are you sure he hasn't left the school or something?"

Tracey furrowed.

"He can't have... I mean, where would he go?"

"I don't know, do I?" Ginny tried her best to keep the annoyance out of her voice. "You know him loads better than I do"

Tracey opened her mouth and for some reason Ginny got the feeling that she was about to object. But then, some sort of realization fell upon her face and her eyes widened.

"The astronomy tower" she said quietly and Ginny stared at her.

"The astronomy tower?" she repeated. "Why would he be up there?"

Tracey shook her head impatiently.

"That doesn't matter, I just know that that's where he might be. Now hurry there before you lose him again!"

Ginny muttered a quick "thanks" to Tracey and then set off, this time heading towards the oak front doors.

How do you make a time line haha

She was afraid, thinking again and again that it should be impossible for a human heart to beat this fast and constantly wondering where she'd go next if he wasn't here. Or if he was. What was she going to say? What did he want to hear? What did she want him to know?

Everything.

Ginny could see how her hand trembled slightly as she grabbed the door-handle and pushed the door leading into the circular shaped room open. He was standing there, facing one of the many windows with his back turned against her. And yet she knew for sure that it was him. She could feel the tension in the air, the cold, the heat...

"You're here"

He turned around slowly at the sound of her voice, but he didn't seem even the slightest surprised or shocked to see her standing there. Perhaps he was just, as usual, really good at hiding his emotions. After she'd closed the door behind her he pointed out, his voice as calm as ever:

"So are you"

"Tracey said I might find you here"

Ginny took a few steps towards him and felt relieved when he didn't move away. Instead, he just furrowed slightly.

"You spoke to Tracey?"

She nodded, looking down without knowing exactly why.

"She's nice"

They both fell silent. Ginny didn't know for how long it lasted but she knew that if she was ever going to say it, now was a great time. For once, there was no one else there to bother them. No prejudiced gryffindors or slytherins. No Bill and no Fleur. No one.

"I came here because I... I wanted to apologize for what I did. I didn't mean to... to slap you in the face"

Even now as she said it she could feel her cheeks reddening slightly and therefore, it felt almost like a relief when Blaise turned away from her again. He snorted slightly.

"You had every right to"

"No, I did not" Her voice was stronger than she'd expected it to be and without really thinking Ginny took another few steps towards him. "I know that you probably saved my life the moment you chose not to tell me..."

"It wasn't an easy decision, if that's what you think"

She forced herself not to flinch at the edge in his voice.

"But you still did the right thing. If I'd gone there..."

She couldn't bring herself to finish her sentence. There was no need to. After a short while Blaise turned around again, curiosity shining in his dark eyes.

"What made you change your mind?" he asked softly, locking his gaze with hers. "Only a week ago you were so mad..."

"It was Neville" Ginny interrupted him and as she saw how confused he was by her words she quickly continued:

"He said something today that made me... think again. He said that these days, time might be up before we know it. And therefore, we shouldn't waste any of it hating"

She couldn't tell what he was thinking. If he considered her mental or even foolish. All she knew was that by telling him what Neville had told her, it all felt even more true than it had before.

"And I don't want you to think that I hate you" she whispered, looking into his eyes. "Because I don't"

She could see how he swallowed and she looked away, feeling as if she'd never be able to drop his gaze otherwise. She thought of Dumbledore's army. Could she tell him about it? Would he be interested? Strangely enough, she found herself not feeling at all worried that he'd give them away.

But was she being naive? Was she wrong to trust him? How much would it hurt if she found out that she'd been extremely foolish all along?

"Can I see your arm?"

If Ginny had felt uncomfortable under his gaze before, that was nothing compared to how she was feeling now. The atmosphere in the room had suddenly changed and dropped several degrees and Blaise narrowed his eyes at her.

"Why?" he asked cooly. "What do you think you'll find there?"

But they both already knew the answer to that question, so Ginny didn't bother saying anything. Instead, she just waited. And eventually, after having rolled his eyes, Blaise pulled up his shirt and revealed his left forearm.

There was nothing there.

She'd known it all along and yet she couldn't help letting out a sigh of relief. Without really thinking, Ginny gently touched his bare skin with her fingers and relaxed even more as he let her. He was warm, warmer than she'd expected him to be. And just like when he'd grabbed her arm, that day down in the dungeons several weeks ago, she felt as if electricity ran through her veins when touching him.

"I just don't want there to be any more secrets"

She only had time to look at up him, and meet his gaze for a split second, before he looked away again. Ginny couldn't help feeling hurt by his sudden move.

"Why do you always do that?"

She couldn't explain why, but tears suddenly erupted in her eyes and there was nothing she could do to stop them. He looked at her again and, seeming slightly astounded by the fact that she was about to start crying, he asked:

"Do what?"

"Look away from me, like you can't even bear thinking about the fact that you're here with me" Her voice was low, but still loud enough for him to make out her every word. "Like I disgust you, like you hate me for who I am..."

And then, before she had time to think and before she had time to react, he'd leaned forward and captured her lips with his. Judging from his movements he seemed almost frustrated and his kiss was desperate, hungry, passionate. And more right than anything Ginny had ever experienced before. It didn't take long before she gave in to the feelings she'd tried her best to ignore for the past couple of weeks, or perhaps even months.

Everything they'd been through. Every single conversation they'd ever had. Every time she'd looked into his eyes. It all came back. And she never wanted to forget.

She mimicked his actions and gave him full access to her mouth and grabbed his neck while he gently put his hand in her hair, deepening the kiss.

Don't stop. Please don't stop.

They were in the astronomy tower, and there was a risk that someone might come in. But Ginny couldn't care less. The tears in her eyes were gone, and she was nothing but happy.

And then it was over. They broke apart as he gently pulled away from her.

Blaise's point of view

It was ironic how he was the one who'd pulled away from Ginny, when all he really wanted was to kiss her again.

"I don't hate you" he whispered, amazed by how hoarse his own voice sounded. "I never did"

Her words kept echoing inside his head.

"I don't want any more secrets", "I trusted you, "You're a coward"...

Blaise opened his mouth to tell her everything, to tell her about Daphne and the horrible mistake he'd made. But no words escaped his lips and Ginny seemed to notice.

"What is it?" she asked.

He looked away for a moment, couldn't stand the intensity, and when locking his gaze with hers again the slap came back to his mind. She'd go back to hating him. He hadn't liked that. She hadn't liked that. And more than anything, he wanted her to be happy.

He could never give her that.

Perhaps it was better to just leave it this way, like nothing but a very special memory. Something he'd never be able to forget. He'd never kissed anyone like that before. It felt real.

"It's nothing" He grabbed her hand gently, silently hoping that she'd believe him. "I have to go"

If he stayed here he wouldn't be able to stay away from her. He'd only let her down and she'd hurt, once she'd realize who he really was and what he'd done. That he couldn't be trusted. That he was the biggest idiots of all times.

He turned away from her and walked with quick steps towards the door leading out of the small, circular shaped room.

Ginny's point of view

"Blaise!"

She didn't care whether she sounded desperate, or whether he had nothing more to say to her. She had to know. He turned around, his hand still on the door handle. When looking into his eyes, she felt as if her heart was ripped in two.

Was this the end of it?

"Do you regret what you just did?"

It was a simple question. Seven words. And yet it's what could change everything. He shook his head slowly, his eyes burning with emotion and pain that she hated.

"Not for the reasons you think"

How do you make a time line haha

Ginny lost count of how many seconds, or more likely minutes, she stood in the astronomy tower staring at the door Blaise had exited through. She felt as if she was being nailed to the floor, unable to move and unable to fully take in what had just happened. And why.

He kissed me.

It was true. He had made the move. She'd just been standing there, spilling her heart out and asking him why he kept treating her like something that he shouldn't get too close to, and he'd kissed her. Just like that.

But no, not "just like that". This had been something else entirely, and Ginny wanted it again. And again. So why had he left?

Not for the reasons you think.

What did that even mean?

It wasn't until it was starting to get dark, and quite cold, that Ginny managed to make her feet move and made her way down the stairs and over the school grounds. The dark sky was clear and she was amazed by the amount of stars, shining down on her as she shivered slightly and pulled her cloak closer around herself.

Don't think she told herself firmly, opening the front doors leading into the castle. You'll only end up over-analyzing things.

And Blaise Zabini wasn't likely to explain it all to her anytime soon. No, just as always when it came to him she'd have to figure out an answer on her own. But perhaps it was better to not even try.

The Entrance Hall was almost empty and when taking a quick glance at her watch Ginny realized why. It was past eight o' clock at night, and so most students had already returned to their common rooms after dinner.

She was thinking of heading down to the kitchens to ask the house-elves if she could have something to eat, but soon found that she wasn't feeling even the slightest hungry. How could she, after what had just happened? And would she ever be able to fall asleep? Ginny couldn't help snorting to herself. She wouldn't even bother getting her hopes up on that one...

When walking up the stairs that'd eventually lead her to the seventh floor and the Gryffindor common room, she tried to figure out what she was really thinking about all this.

Was she confused? More than ever. But happy? For some inexplicable reason, perhaps even more...

"Ginny!"

Ginny jumped at the sound of the voice calling her name. She'd been so occupied with her thoughts that she hadn't noticed she was standing right in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady, absentmindedly staring out into nothing.

"What are you doing?" Madison asked confusedly, crossing her arms at her friend. "Why won't you go inside?"

Ginny opened and closed her mouth several times before muttering:

"I... I didn't realize..."

But Madison interrupted her:

"I've been walking around the castle looking for you for at least half an hour! Neville and I got worried when you didn't show up for dinner and then we went looking in the library and at Hagrid's but you were nowhere to be found! Where were you?"

Her friend glared at Ginny expectantly, indicating that no explanation but the whole truth would be good enough. Ginny took a deep breath.

"I was in the astronomy tower"

She took a quick glance at the Fat Lady and realized that she'd, thankfully, dozed off. Still, Madison lowered her voice somewhat:

"The astronomy tower?" she repeated, her eyes shining with confusion. "What were you doing up there?"

I don't hate you. I never did.

"I... I..."

Madison waited. Ginny waited. For a good answer to pop into her mind. But it never did.

"You were with him, weren't you?"

It was the way her friend used the word "him" that made Ginny react. It was obvious that she was referring to someone in particular, someone whose name she perhaps even feared to mention...

"You can see it in your eyes"

Ginny didn't bothering asking what that meant. Perhaps it was better not to know.

"He kissed me, Madison"

Madison's eyes widened and she managed to choke out:

"Wh... what?"

Ginny nodded silently, hoping that her friend would say something to assure her that she was fine with it. Madison was quiet for a short while before stating:

"Well... I always thought that he was into you but I hadn't expected that..."

"No" Ginny admitted. "No, it was a bit unexpected"

And great.

"Well?"

Madison's voice brought Ginny back to reality once again and she furrowed at her friend. She rolled her eyes impatiently before exclaiming:

"How was it? People always said he was a great kisser..."

How many people had he kissed? And who did Madison know who'd kissed him? For some reason, Ginny didn't like the idea of him kissing anyone else. And she felt stupid for resonating that way. It was not like they were a couple or anything...

"Well, they were right" Ginny muttered under her breath and her friend smirked.

"I'm really happy for you, when are you seeing him again?"

Ginny laughed slightly, but it was not out of joy. She felt almost bitter.

"It's not like that, Madison. He... The circumstances are different"

She snorted.

"What do you mean? Either you like each other or you do not and I can tell that you do..."

"He left"

Madison stared at her, looking surprised by the emptiness in Ginny's voice.

"What do you mean he left?"

She swallowed. This hurt. Bad. Don't think about it. Oh yes, that's easy...

"After we'd... He just left" she said quietly, finding it hard to meet her friend's gaze. "So I asked him if he regretted what we'd just done..."

She drifted off. Madison seemed to hold her breath.

"And?" she finally asked.

"And he said 'not for the reasons you think'" Ginny finished, only to once again realize how confusing that sentence was.

In fact, it made no sense whatsoever.

"What does that even mean?" Madison asked, furrowing.

Ginny shook her head slowly. She was tired. So tired after today's all new experiences. Perhaps she would be able to fall asleep, after all.

"I have no idea"

Madison seemed to realize that Ginny wanted the conversation to be over and therefore called at the Fat Lady:

"Wake up! We want to get in!"

The Fat Lady started to stir in her portrait and mumbled, still half asleep:

"Password?"

Madison said the password and they entered the somewhat crowded Gryffindor common room together. It appeared that a lot of students had tons of homework to deal with tonight. Ginny herself had a Potions essay that was due tomorrow, but there was no way she'd be able to concentrate now.

"Ginny!"

Neville waved at them from one of the couches, where he was sitting with Colin Creevey and Seamus Finnigan. As she and Madison made their way over there Ginny said:

"You can't tell anyone. Not even Neville"

Especially not Neville...

Madison nodded slightly.

"I promise" she said softly and sat down in one of the armchairs, soon starting a conversation about quidditch with Colin and Seamus.

Blaise's point of view

Blaise was surprised to find Draco sitting on one of the couches in the Slytherin common room, reading what looked like The Daily Prophet, when he got there. He had expected all students to be in the Great Hall having dinner, but apparently Draco wasn't any hungrier than he was.

Perhaps it was his latest encounter with Ginny, and what it had made him realize, that made Blaise make up his mind at that very moment. He might never get to be close to Ginny again and to be able to get through that he needed a friend.

And Draco had never failed him so far.

Blaise took a deep breath, slowly making his way through the common room and heading towards him. However, before he had time to even open his mouth, Draco said:

"I know what you're going to say"

He slowly folded the newspaper and locked his cold gaze with Blaise's. The latter raised his eyebrows in surprise but Draco quickly continued:

"... and I want to reach you to it. I want to apologize for what I said. I don't know anything about your mother's relationship, and I was wrong to assume that it's up to you to fix it"

Blaise was too flabbergasted to speak. Draco Malfoy openly admitting that he was wrong? Yeah, when hell freezes over... He could hardly believe his ears.

"I'm sorry for what I said, too" he finally managed to say, his voice quiet even though he forced himself to look right into his friend's eyes. "I didn't mean any of it"

"No, you were right" Draco said bitterly, placing The Daily Prophet on the table in front of him. "I never stood up to my father, and I made so many wrong choices..."

"You didn't have any choices" Blaise interrupted him firmly, crossing his arms as if to prove his point. "There's a great difference"

He could tell from the look on Draco's face that he didn't fully believe him, but at least he didn't seem to have the strength to object. There was a long silence and Blaise silently wondered whether he was supposed to say something, and at least ask his friend what he'd been up to during this last week. It felt strange, considering the fact that they usually talked to each other every day...

He decided upon sitting down in one of the armchairs, staring into the crackling fire while pondering over where to start. But once again, Draco was quicker:

"So..." he said, leaning slightly backwards on the couch and giving Blaise an expectant look.

It was obvious that he wasn't angry anymore, but right now it was hard to tell whether that was really a good thing... Blaise, who couldn't help feeling slightly nervous when he saw Draco's somewhat pleased looking face expression, turned to face him again and asked:

"So what?"

"Why weren't you at dinner? Busy snogging Weasley or something?"

Draco snorted to himself, as if what he'd just said was a really funny joke, but Blaise got so shocked that he couldn't even bring himself to lie and promise that that was not the case. In fact, he could almost feel his own face go pale and he stared at Draco in disbelief.

How the bloody hell did he know?

It didn't take long before the smirk disappeared from his friend's lips and his eyes widened slightly as he asked, his voice low:

"Oh Merlin you did, didn't you?"

Blaise managed to open and close his mouth several times but no words escaped his lips. And what was he supposed to say? He'd already told himself to forget about it, and how could he ever do that if Draco knew?

Nobody was supposed to find out...

His heart seemed to stop beating for a moment when another horrible thought hit him:

What if she told someone?

But she wouldn't. He'd walked away, acting like a complete idiot, so why would she want anyone to know about that? She'd not only embarrass him, but herself as well.

"I wish I could say that I was surprised"

Draco's words brought Blaise back to reality and he furrowed, swallowing twice. He hated how his voice trembled (it made him seem even more guilty) when he asked:

"What do you mean?"

Draco snorted again, shaking his head.

"You know what's funny about you Blaise? You always seem to think that you're so much better at hiding what you feel than you really are"

He couldn't bring himself to respond to that. Draco eventually told him:

"You should honestly just take a photo of her, it'll last longer and you won't have to stare your eyes out every time you see her..."

"I do not..." Blaise began heatedly but his friend interrupted him:

"And I would tell you that it was completely stupid, that she belongs to Potter and that you're just wasting your time- if it weren't for the fact that she looks at you, too. A lot."

"That's not true"

They looked at each other again and Draco raised his eyebrows slowly. It was obvious that he didn't appreciate being told that he was wrong, which Blaise was sure of that he was.

"Yes it is" he said, his voice sounding almost cold. "You're just too busy looking down on yourself to notice it"

Draco drifted off for a moment but then he parted his lips again, and continued:

"But there's no point of pretending, I know that now. You should just take it for what it is, Blaise. The Weasley girl has fallen head over heels for you"

Apart from his friend's actual words, what caught Blaise by surprise was the fact that there was no malice or sound of disgust in Draco's voice. It didn't sound as if he could barely bring himself to think about what he'd just said or as if kissing Ginny Weasley was the worst thing that could ever happen.

He'd just said it. Like a plain statement.

"So you're... you're okay with it?"

This was it. As usual, it was impossible to tell what Draco was thinking and even though the other wizard's opinion shouldn't matter that much to him Blaise couldn't help hoping that his answer would be yes. Even though it was probably all over, he could need at least one person on his side...

You're playing with fire, Blaise. Tracey's words echoed in his head. Would Draco say the same thing?

"To be honest, I don't mind. I've had enough of all this blood-talk, it causes nothing but problems"

Blaise found himself letting out a sigh of relief and he couldn't help shaking his head slowly.

"Who are you and what have you done to Draco Malfoy?"

Draco smirked slightly and at that moment Blaise was really happy that they were on good terms again.

"I'm not as impossible as people often seem to think. Besides, it could have been Daphne and that would have been way worse..."

The smile disappeared from Blaise's face in an instant and Draco didn't miss it. He leaned slightly closer to Blaise and then asked, his voice even lower than before:

"Please don't tell me... "

"It was a mistake"

"What was?" Draco asked immediately, wasting no time in waiting for Blaise to explain himself.

Blaise sighed, knowing his friend wouldn't give up until he'd been given the whole truth. He felt sick again.

"I was just... pissed off after Ginny had slapped me and I'd gotten into a fight with you and before I knew it she was all over me..."

It was a pathetic excuse, but unfortunately it was all he had. Draco stared at him in disbelief.

"You slept with her?!"

Apparently one look on Blaise's face was all it took for his friend to exclaim:

"I thought you said that you were done with her, and Pansy! I mean, only weeks ago you hated it when Daphne tried to kiss you in the library..."

"I hated it this time as well" Blaise muttered under his breath but Draco snorted.

"What are you trying to say, that she raped you? Surely you must have played some part in it!"

"Of course I did but..."

Blaise drifted off. There was a long silence. He was out of words and apparently, so was Draco.

"Did you tell her? Weasley, I mean"

Now it was Blaise's turn to snort.

"Of course not. She'd go back to hating me in an instant" he said quietly. "But I'm done with lying"

"Which means?"

This was the hardest part. Admitting it to somebody else made it even more real and even more frightening. He could hear someone open the portrait hole and so he knew that he had to say it quick if he wanted to get it all out before the common room was filled with students again.

"Which means that I'll forget that tonight ever happened. It's better for both of us. And especially for her"

Draco stared at him.

"You really do care for her, don't you?"

He sounded slightly surprised, astounded, even. Blaise swallowed. There was no going back now.

"Yes" he said. "Yes, I do"

Author's note: Slightly strange ending, perhaps. Please, please review! :)