A/N: And here's the 4th chapter! Thank you all for the reviews!
The next few days were crazy. Meredith took Brian to the park almost every day. Whenever she thought Derek was around she'd act like she was paying so much attention to Brian, when really she was looking over her should every two seconds to see if he was still there.
But as the time passed, Brian couldn't help but notice she wasn't paying as much attention to the high school bully... And actually paying attention to him. Or maybe it was his imagination. He didn't care either way.
Brian was actually starting to find the whole experience nice. To him it just felt like the times they would hang out the two of them together. Something he loved to do. But The idea that everything would Work out fine quickly dissolved within a few seconds.
Nothing seemed to be working for Meredith. She brought Brian to the park where Derek almost always was with the kids he nannies. Meredith thought it kind of funny how they looked a lot like him. But the fact they could be his kids never fazed her. But more importantly, she was upset that Derek hardly even noticed she was there half the time.
She needed to kick it up a notch.
"Brian, Kiss me." She said suddenly.
"Wait, What?" He replied completely taken aback. Where had that come from? Kissing wasn't apart of the deal, was it?
"Just-," She didn't even wait for him to answer again, wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in to a kiss.
Brian was surprised, but only too happy to return the kiss. His body filled with warmth. This was something he'd been wanting to do for a long time. He could feel the spark between them. Her lips seemed to match his perfect.
Meredith couldn't deny the kiss was great, hell it was spectacular. If she was Sleeping Beauty, this would've been the kiss to wake her. Kissing Brian just felt so right. She tried hiding the feeling of joy the kiss wasn't supposed to feel like this. It was supposed to be awkward. Then she wouldn't feel guilty for using Brian. The kiss brought back all the feelings she ever had about Brian. The ones she though she stomped out after all the heartache he caused her.
Meredith tried to suppress them at the moment. The kiss was supposed to get another guy to notice her! Not to make her end up falling for the guy who was always just a friend!
Meredith broke the kiss, and looked up at Brian, "I-I'm sorry..." She said softly and slipped her arms from around his neck. "I should go...," Meredith said then quickly headed off.
"Wait, Meredith!" Brian called out to her, but she didn't come back.
Meredith lay on the couch later that day, eating a bowl of ice cream, trying to think out her feelings about everything. The euphoria from kissing Brian mostly wore off at this time. Then she thought about Derek and how nice he always was to her.
A sharp rapping from the door awoke her from her thinking, "Meredith. Open Up. We need to talk." Brian called though the other side of the door.
Meredith let out a huge sigh; he was obviously here to talk about the kiss. Something she really didn't feel like doing. But she put her bowl down and opened the door for Brian. "Hi," She forced a smile and stepped aside for him to enter.
"Hi," He replied and walked in to the room. "Meredith, I- Wait, why're you watching Go! Diego! Go!?" He quickly asked. "Never mind. That's not important. Look Meredith, I can't do this anymore."
"We lost the remote," She quickly explained when he asked. "Wait, what do you mean you can't do this anymore?"
"I can't keep pretending to be your boyfriend, Meredith! I-I love you, okay? I have for a while now. I agreed to do this to spend more time with you," He said starting to vent, "But now after that kiss today, I felt something, something, great. And knowing that in the end, you'll never be mine, well I just can't do that. I can't pretend that your mine, when I know you're not," He finished.
It almost felt as though a huge weight was lifted from his shoulders. He finally got all of feelings out to her. And there was no way of taking them back.
"You love me?" She repeated from all of that. Denise was right. He did have feelings for her.
Strong ones.
"Yeah, I do," he said softly and looked down.
"Brian… I-I'm so sorry," She said and felt the tears welling up in her eyes. Guilt suddenly ate her up. She used him. She couldn't even imagine how she would've felt if this happened to her. And the fact she had feelings for him still was making everything worse.
"Meredith look, don't be upset with yourself, okay? I-I knew what I was getting in to, I brought this upon myself," He stood there for a moment more, "I-I think maybe I should go, I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay?"
No response. Her face was buried in her hands, and he could tell she was crying. He wanted to help, make her feel better, but he also didn't want to make things worse. Instead, he just left.