Thank you all so much. Some of your reviews brought tears to my eyes. New chapter today! This one takes place during the memorial ceremony for the victims. The funerals are separate. I hope you enjoy it. This is probably the second to last chapter. I can't believe it, this fic has gone by so fast.
The monologue quoted is by William Shakespeare from Macbeth, Act V, Scene V. I do not own it. It's Macbeth's last soliloquy, and I thought it was incredibly beautiful so I stuck it in.
Summary: McKinley High goes on lockdown with Marley and Kitty stuck in the choir room together. Karley.
Characters: Marley R. and Kitty
Rating: T
Out, out, brief candle.
Life is but a walking shadow,
A poor player that struts his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more.
It is a tale, told by an idiot,
Full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.
-Macbeth, Act V, Scene V
A WEEK LATER
The snow was crisp and clean against Marley's feet, and she shivered, buttoning up her coat another button and adjusting the green scarf against her steel gray coat. The air was crisp and cold against her skin, and she rubbed her nose lightly, hoping to make it thaw.
"Marley," she heard someone call, and Marley Rose whipped around, her light brown hair fanning around her face. She smiled weakly as she saw that it was Brittany, whose eyes seemed sad and strangely downcast.
"Hi, Britt," she said and smiled sadly at her friend, stopping in front of the church. Brittany smiled sadly and got out of her car, closely flanked by Santana.
"Hey, Marley," Santana said and walked over to her, the normally feisty girl more collected. She smiled quickly, the corners of her mouth barely upturning as she hugged Marley, tears brimming in her eyes.
"Is Quinn coming?" Marley asked quickly, knowing how much Kitty admired her.
"Yep," Santana said, and right on cue, another car pulled up and Quinn stepped out of it, followed by a shorter girl that Marley later learned was the Rachel Berry and flanked by a tall, lanky guy that was Kurt Hummel.
"I-Santana," Quinn said, obviously flustered. "Hi." She said and tried to smile, somehow failing.
"Hey, Q," Santana said and her hand rose to touch her cheek, quickly pulling it away again. "Hi, Berry, Kurt."
"Hi, Santana, Brittany," Rachel said and acknowledged each of them with a slight nod. She turned to Marley. "And you are…?"
"Marley Rose," Marley said quickly and took her outstretched hand, shaking it briefly before removing it and sticking it in her coat pocket.
"Right," Rachel said and Kurt nodded at her.
"It's nice to meet you," the boy said, and Marley nodded again weakly.
"I can't believe this happened," Quinn said dully, and Rachel patted her arm lightly and stared at the ground, biting her lip. There was an uncomfortable silence for a few seconds before Rachel looked up again.
"She's been a nervous wreck," Rachel explained in a forced whisper.
"She came to New York as soon as she heard," Kurt explained further and nodded at Quinn, who didn't respond at all. Marley briefly wondered why she would feel guilty before remembering her position in high school.
She had been a stereotypical preppy blonde cheerleader, probably a bitch to every loser under the sun. Not too much a surprise that there might be some guilt there.
The shooters had, after all, been looking for redemption.
Santana took a shallow breath, but other than that, the group stayed silent. The screeching of tires could be heard by them and Sugar stepped out of the car, noticeably more pale and drawn. "Hi," she mumbled and stared weakly at the ground. Her mascara was already beginning to water, and Marley briefly thanked God that she had the sense not to put on any eye makeup.
"Hey, Sugar," Quinn said, still staring at the ground, and when she looked up, her eyes were red and watery.
"Who else is coming?" Rachel asked and bit her lip nervously. Her left foot pawed at the snow.
"Kitty should be," Marley said quickly, and Rachel furrowed her brow.
"Kitty?" She asked and looked around for an answer.
"Person I mentored at Thanksgiving," Quinn said and brushed a piece of hair away from her face.
Rachel made a face like she understood.
"I-Ryder and Sam are still under observation," Sugar said and shrugged. "So they won't be here. Tina's family is taking off for a few days."
They all knew about Artie. There was no way of not knowing. There was no point in not knowing.
Marley had found out the day before she left the hospital. She had found the newspaper and read the completed list of victims. There were too many familiar names.
Artie Abrams. The kind boy in the wheelchair with the ever-present smile.
Joe Hart. Marley had never really spoken to him much, but she remembered the quiet intensity he had about him and it made her head ache to think that it was all gone.
And finally the last one that she knew, the one that left a gaping hole in her heart, a hole of guilt and pain that left her holding back tears every single time she thought of him.
Jake Puckerman.
She hadn't seen his brother. She hadn't seen his mother, and she hoped to God she wouldn't have to face them today. No matter how many times anyone told her it wasn't her fault, Marley knew in her gut that it was. She hadn't done anything. She had restrained Kitty, who did want to do something. It was all her fault, and she let out a strangled cry. Sugar looked at her strangely, but Marley merely vaguely waved her hand and shook her head. Sugar nodded like she understood and turned back to the haltingly awkward conversation.
"Unique, Blaine, and Sam aren't coming," Marley heard Sugar say, and when she looked back, she was holding up her phone. "They don't want to." Unique. Marley had nearly forgotten about Unique. More guilt shot across her body and she shook her head again vigorously.
Finn appeared behind Rachel and tapped her shoulder. "Hey, Rachel," he said and attempted his large, boyish grin, but Rachel merely smiled weakly at him. An unfamiliar car pulled up about twenty feet away and the door opened. Marley furrowed her brow and looked at the door when it opened, and Kitty stepped out, her hair tumbling over her coat. She wore a bandage on her head and looked curiously at Marley.
"Kitty," Marley said and tried to smile, rushing toward the shorter girl. She paused. It was the first time they had seen each other since the hospital, and Marley wasn't sure where they stood.
She was ripped out of her thoughts by Kitty's arms and they embraced, Marley's heart beginning to flutter lightly. "Hey," Kitty whispered into her ear, and Marley let out a watery giggle.
"Hi," she replied as they pulled apart.
The church bell began to toll grimly. Marley swallowed and looked up at it, the bells ringing in her ears. "It's time," she remarked to Kitty, and she nodded, the startling mixture of colors in her eyes alight with tears.
Clutching Kitty's hand in her own and ignoring the stares of others, she stepped inside the church, the flames of the candles lit wavering and flickering in the light breeze from the outside. Marley lit her own and grimaced as the match blew out once, then tried again and failed. "Let me," Kitty said, and she successfully lit the candle. It blazed merrily—too merrily—next to the others and Marley watched it for a few seconds before going into the church.
Pushing deeper into the church, she sat down, looking at the line of portraits. She swallowed as her eyes traced over Artie, Joe, the countless faces she didn't recognize, and then finally Jakes'. Kitty stopped next to her and stared at the portrait and Marley sighed quietly. They were buried under the cold, hard ground in the cemetery, with flowers lying on their graves, weak reminders of the relationships they had had while they were still alive.
Marley became painfully aware of the thudding of her heart in her ribcage. It wasn't fair. Why should her heart be moving, pumping blood through her veins when Jake and Artie and Joe lay several feet underground, not moving, not breathing, not living. Why should she be painfully aware of the cold and the heat and all of her senses when they were numb to everything, pain, happiness, life?
It wasn't fair. Life wasn't fair. Death wasn't fair. Death was equal and terrifying, the deep, dark oblivion that every human ended up in eventually. Life wasn't equal. Life was far from it. Life was unfair and harsh and unforgiving, one mistake branding you a fool for your entire life or one fluke branding you good until your death.
People began to speak. "Great tragedy," Marley could make out.
"We will miss everyone dearly…" another person said, and Marley's heart began to constrict violently and she grimaced. You know nothing, she thought venomously.
"Lack of police communication," a uniformed man was saying with a bored look on his face like he didn't really care. Marley tuned them out, and eventually, their words blurred into some kind of a thoughtless haze. Their faces began to meld together in a blur of tears: grieving mothers, cousins, officials, people who were there out of principle, all of them became a streak of color against a monotone background.
Kitty leaned on Marley's shoulder, tears trickling down her cheeks and staining the fabric, but Marley didn't mind. Somehow, they made it through the service. Somehow, they even managed it without dissolving into pure grief, into pure self-loathing.
After the service, Marley turned to leave, sliding out of the pew. Kitty's hand on her arm stopped her, and she glanced wordlessly at the other girl, who stood up and grabbed her hand. "Walk with me," she whispered. "Please." Marley nodded.
They threaded their way through the leaving crowd and began to walk along the graveyard, the cold air biting into Marley's skin and making her shiver. They reached a small stone bench and Kitty sat down on it, brushing off the snow and motioning to Marley to do the same. The concrete was cold against Marley's thighs.
Entwining her fingers with the girl sitting next to her, Marley gazed down at her calm form, her eyes staring ahead, her lashes long and moist with tears. Her blonde hair curled perfectly and tumbled down her back in an effortless waterfall, framing her face. Marley preferred it to the harsh cheerleader ponytail. The ponytail was a reminder of brutal insults that weren't serious, of slushies and vomiting and cold insults.
Kitty turned and looked her directly in the eye, keeping her expression neutral. Marley bit her lip and looked away. "I never got to really thank you," Marley blurted out awkwardly, and looked back at Kitty. "I mean, I never got to thank you when you were…conscious," she explained awkwardly, her lip catching between her teeth and her breath hitching.
Every single one of her senses seemed to be on high alert. The wind picked up a bit and her hair began to blow around slightly. Birds were tweeting slightly, and the bright green of a few pine trees stood out against the bland snow. The wind stopped suddenly, and the entire world seemed to be holding its breath until Kitty broke the silence.
"You shouldn't thank me," Kitty muttered and looked directly at Marley, sending chills through her spine. Marley leaned on her knees with her elbows and Kitty did the same, mirroring her. They were so close, their noses were nearly touching, and Marley's breath hitched again, her heart swelling. She stared into Kitty's eyes, unblinking. Kitty's eyes were a strange but utterly beautiful color, her pupils wide. Marley's heart took off.
It was so easy, so natural for Marley to lean in and close the gap.