'Ello there readers. (: Sorry this chapter is a few days late; I got distracted (you guys know how life is). But I also got busy with a new story! A Final Fantasy XIII-2 is now published, so if you like that game, go check it out. If not, well, at least you're sticking with this story.

Honestly, I've been disheartened with the lack of reviews lately. Thanks to those of you who are constant reviewers, and to you constant readers, I'm BEGGING you, give me SOMETHING! I'm giving you tons after all. It's only fair. ;) If you don't start, I may start delaying the chapters.

I was going to say something else…Oh yeah, the length of this chapter should make up for the few days that it's late. So here it finally is, enjoy!

Chapter Sixteen: Clarity

The Darkness surrounded me, just as it had done a hundred times before. Dreamless, I lay under the warm covers of my bed and the sun shines through the window of my home. In my unconsciousness, I felt nothing out of the ordinary. Nothing frightening, nothing hurtful, but nothing happy either.

"Steph, time for school!" a voice boomed from downstairs.

Wait, what? I thought at the call. I didn't push myself up out of the pillows because of my tiredness, even if I was waking up mentally. School? Since when did Riku actually call it "school" when he woke me up? And besides, that didn't sound like Riku's voice in the first place. Why would I have school right now when I wasn't even home?

"Come on, kiddo, up and at 'em," the voice said again. This time, he was in my room. And quickly approaching me.

"Idunwanna…" I heard myself say groggily.

He chuckled as he set a hand on my back. The warmth was completely different from the warmth of the sun, but in a terrific was. "I know you don't want to," he said lowly, voice soft but strong. "But you can't miss your college classes."

"Ugh, college…" I groaned into the pillow. The thoughts of uncertainty started fading away, as did my grogginess. It was all just a dream; I was in my bedroom and waking up for my college classes at the local university. That was nothing out of the ordinary. Of course it wasn't.

"Your friends are going to be waiting for you in twenty minutes; you should hurry and get ready. Or else."

I knew what that "or else" meant; it meant that he was going to tickle me. "Okay, okay," I said. "Get out."

Again, his warm chuckle entered my ears. He didn't protest as he took his hand off my back and started out of the room. Of course he'd give me my privacy so that I could get ready; he wasn't sick and twisted in any way. He was kind, sincere, loving…A little over protective, but he was still the only man that I loved.

He was my dad.

He was my only parent now, but it was okay. In Twilight Town, kids didn't ask why somebody only had one parent. They didn't treat me any differently just because they had two parents and I only had one. The love that my father gave me made up for any love I could have gotten from another parent.

In a flash, a mental picture of a wicked mother flashed across my mind. It was frightening enough for me to bolt up in my bed. Something didn't feel right here. I couldn't shake the vibe that something was terribly wrong here. But my bedroom looked the same as it did the rest of my life before this; nothing was missing or added in. And no mother was hovering over me and telling me that I was a worthless girl who was only concerned with her own well being. That would have been a lie anyway. I wasn't a selfish person most of the time; I tried to be a good person. Nobody liked a jerk, after all.

But…who am I, exactly? I thought as I climbed into the shower and started preparing for the day. The question made me feel dazed for some reason. Who was I? I couldn't put it into words, nor could I connect it to my past. The past was fuzzy. I imagined this was what it was like for most of the elderly folk in their old age, but I was only eighteen. Eighteen and in college; I should have had a better memory than that. So instead of thinking deeply about the topic and getting depressed over my bad memory, I answered the question more simply: I am who and what I am.

Nobody was supposed to know their identity at this age; this was the time they were supposed to discover it. But there was a deeper issue for me than that. I couldn't examine my past and see what made me who I am. In fact, I felt as if a large chunk of my past was missing. It felt like my identity was a lie in a lot of ways.

But despite the lie I felt I was living, I was happy. I made a bunch of new friends at my community college and was dating a boy I never pictured myself falling for.

Twenty minute later when I was dressed and ready, I went downstairs to see that boy waiting for me and talking to my father, Terry. But of course, when he saw me, his eyes lit up and the conversation ended. "Hey, Steph," he greeted with a smile.

And, of course, his smile brought one of mine out. "Hey John," I said as I walked over to him. I gave him a kiss on the cheek and smiled shyly at how brightly his eyes shone just at the sight of me. This was how it always was growing up, from what I could remember. My friends insisted that he always loved me and they were right. It took some time, but I fell in love with him as well. The only future that I wanted was by his side. First we had to create futures for ourselves though, through getting a better education and getting jobs.

We had to grow up, but we would be doing it together.

"Ready for school?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," I said with a small sigh, though I wasn't really that upset. This was just what needed to be done, so I accepted it. I was going to be a teacher. It was something I always had a passion for. The other thing I had considered was social work; I wanted to help people. I didn't know how to make a big difference in the world, but for now, it looked like being a teacher would be the most influential thing I could do with my life. I had to make a name for myself.

John chuckled and grasped my hand briefly, squeezing it before he started leading me out of the house. "I'll make sure she doesn't fall asleep in any of her classes!" he called over his shoulder to my dad, who smiled immediately.

"Alright John, but if she does, make sure she doesn't snore."

"Hey!" I cried.

But the two just laughed at the joke as John and I exited the house. This wasn't unusual for them; they always were acting chummy with each other. It only backed up my Dad's belief that John and I were meant for each other. I loved John, but…it didn't feel right to me. Whenever I was around John, my head felt funny. And so did my heart. It felt as if…John wasn't the one I was meant to have feelings for.

"Hey, everything okay?" John asked as he continued holding my hand. We had been walking for a few minutes and I had been silent.

"I…Something doesn't feel right," I said softly. I lifted a hand to my heart, gripping my necklace as I looked down at the ground. When my boyfriend was silent, I kept on talking. "It feels like I shouldn't even be here right now. Like I don't belong."

"But of course you belong, silly," John said reassuringly, smiling faintly at me. "And where else could you possibly need to be?"

"I dunno," I responded quietly, and a bit sadly. And I didn't know anything. I felt so anxious and uncertain here. Especially with John. That had happened a lot lately, but he hadn't done anything wrong. "Maybe it's just the weird dreams I had last night, about Heartless, and a group of friends I've never met, and a mouse king, and…"

"Hey, hey," he said gently, wrapping his arm around me as we walked. "Relax. You're just groggy is all. Once you wake up and come back to reality, your dreams will fade away. You'll feel better in no time."

Despite myself, I smiled weakly. "Hope you're right," I murmured as I wrapped my arm around his lower back. As was his custom, he then leaned over and gave me a kiss on the top of my brunette hair. Again I felt disoriented and confused. But why shouldn't I enjoy the affections of my boyfriend?

I took his advice and "came back to reality" and left my dream world behind as the day went on, focusing on my classes. Fortunately for me, I was alright enough at lunch that my college friends, Hayner, Pence, and Olette, didn't notice anything wrong. It was the same deal when I went home and my dad asked about my day. I told him all about the boring classes and how swamped I was with homework tonight. I wouldn't have any time to dwell on these weird thoughts of mine, nor would I have time to try and find some sort of solace.

And, of course, he asked me how things were with John. I told him the truth: things were fine. He was a sweetheart and he treated me well. For the millionth time, my dad commented on how he hoped the two of us stayed together; if anything had to take his princess away from him, he wanted it to be a decent guy.

When he used the name "princess", I got chills. What was up with that?

It was another question that I ignored. The questions were racking up now, but I simply ignored them. After homework, then I could consider what was wrong with me. If that time ever came. I predicted that by the time I was done with my homework, I'd be too exhausted to do any soul-searching. Besides, it was easy to come up with excuses to avoid digging myself deeper in this issue. What if it was too big for me to face? I may have been seen as a coward for avoiding it, but really, I was smart. No need to face a problem that I didn't need to.

That night I went to bed and slept my troubles away. For the time.

*…*…*…*…*

Life continued on as usual the next few days. The daily routine was always the same: Oversleep, rush to get ready, go to school, come home, do homework, sleep. There was some socializing and eating thrown in there somewhere too. Everything around me was perfectly normal, and yet…Yet I still didn't feel comfortable.

Was it my friends? Absolutely not. Hayner, Pence, and Olette were only my friends since I started college this fall, but I was always happy with them. Hayner could come across as a jerk, but by now I knew how sincere he really was. Pence was a dork, but sweet. And Olette was a motherly figure who everyone spoke to about trouble. But I couldn't talk to her about this; I'd sound like an idiot. John already was looking at me like I was a stranger because of how I acted the past few days.

It was like I was in a fog. Lost in a maze without a map on how to get out. My head told me that I was just sick of this mundane life and trying to find my place. It said there should be more to life than this, but there wasn't. My heart told me otherwise. My heart said that not only should there be more to life, but there was. I was meant to be living it right now but I wasn't. Why wasn't I? Why couldn't I break out of this fog I was in?

Things that were fresh on my mind from my dreaming the other night were faded away. They were shadows of the memories they once were. Maybe it all was just a dream, or a dream of a dream. It hardly mattered now. This was my life. Right or wrong, this was it. It didn't seem like there was any way to get to the right place, where I belonged. The fog was becoming normal. Still, I wondered who I was and what I was doing. And why I felt so empty.

The afternoon of the third day, I was walking home from school by myself. Everyone else was going to the Struggle Tournament, but my heart wouldn't be in it if I went. I feigned sickness, which was a valid excuse for everyone else. They began noticing the differences in me and thought it was just because I didn't feel well. I let them believe it, but I myself did not. Something just wasn't right! What was I doing here? What was my purpose? I had a greater destiny than this! I knew I did!

I suddenly collided with somebody while I was walking because of my lack of attention. I backed up a step, stumbling slightly as I regained my composure. "I'm sorry," I automatically said to the person before I looked up and saw their face. It was then that I felt at a loss.

The person before me was half a foot taller than I was with silver hair that only partially hid his eyes and barely reached his shoulders. He was built strong, but at the same time, he was still eighteen like I was. But unlike the first time I saw him so long ago, it wasn't his physical features that held me captive. It was those dazzling aqua eyes.

"I know your face," I whispered to both myself and to him. My bright blue eyes darted over his stern face, trying to pick out what emotions were present. Seriousness was one, but if I wasn't mistaken, I saw some sorrow too. And love.

The name hit me like a semitruck. "Riku."

This was Riku standing right in front of me. My best friend. He came to save me in the past when Darkness overtook all of Twilight Town. Then we travelled together and we started falling for each other. But not before we discovered I was a princess to a far away kingdom. Since then, we spent every day together and fell for each other more and more.

My head was pounding so hard at the sudden rush of memories that I sank down to my knees, a small groan leaving my lips. Riku. Riku. This was the reason that my life was so empty. He wasn't with me. He wasn't there to force me back on the right path and face my destiny.

The world around me began to blur and Riku just stood right in front of me, gazing down at me with the same expression he held all along. I glanced up at him and saw him fade last of all, his eyes burnt into my memory as new surroundings became more clear to me.

It was purely black. But instead of being cold like the Darkness normally was, this place was the perfect temperature. This was the type of place where any person would want to take a nap. That was the whole point of this place: It was meant to keep the unconscious asleep.

Despite the dimness of the area, I looked around to try and see where I was. I was floating in serenity, perfectly comfortable and content. Except that the person who brought me out of the fog wasn't with me. I'd fight to get to him. But first I had to get out of here.

My bow and arrow both appeared in my grasp as I put the arrow in its place. My fingers pulled back the string and it quivered with the tension. Where was I even shooting? Wherever I felt the arrow was meant to go. I prayed that God or whoever was in charge of my fate would guide my arrow so that it would hit the mark and that it would actually serve its purpose. The arrow glowed after my prayers were said, providing a light in the area to both comfort and guide me. "Come on, hit the mark," I murmured as I randomly pointed my arrow at the wall in front of me.

It launched and struck the wall. Immediately light engulfed the area. It was bright enough for me to cover my eyes with my arm. Something was changing. The air was losing its comforting heat and the darkness was completely gone. I also heard the sounds of an opening door, or something of the sort. I couldn't resist opening my eyes and looking out, blinking in startlement as the pod opened and revealed a circular room that was somehow familiar to me. Just by the air, I could tell that I was in Twilight Town. Or rather, the imitation version of it. It was just something that I could sense.

But I wasn't alone in this room. In front of me, a shocked Isabella stood outside the pod. And then I felt more clarity than I had in weeks. Isabella knocked me out and dragged me here. She was going to have me stay asleep in that pod forever!

As if realizing what I was thinking, she turned and started away. "No you don't!" I heard myself cry hoarsely. I quickly jumped out of the pod and landed on the outside, but my feet weren't steady right away. I fell down to one knee as I grasped my bow in my hand, eyes wide as she headed towards the exit. But then they narrowed. You won't get away this time.

I summoned an arrow to my hand and quickly set it in place before shooting it off. My aim was right on. The arrow pierced the sleeve of Isabella and pinned her against the wall several yards away from the exit. She turned to face me, surprisingly nervous as she lifted her other hand to remove the arrow from her sleeve.

I thwarted that plan when I pinned that arm to her other side, another arrow in her sleeve but not piercing the witch. Looking at her now, frightened and weak, I knew that I had another chance to do away with her for good. This devil could no longer haunt me if I were to get rid of her now.

"You know something," I started calmly. Walking over to her, I placed another arrow in its place, my weapon ready to fire. "I've been wanting this for so long, Isabella. You took away everything from me by taking away the memories of my dad. And just now, you nearly did it again." The bitterness rose in my heart as I glared at her, a few yards away as I stopped. "You tried keeping me asleep for good, happy in my own little dream world. But you miscalculated. I love life even if it is full of pain. It's not something that I'll give up just for sweet dreams."

Isabella stopped struggling against the arrows, instead staring at me behind her dark black bangs. Panic was in her gaze, but so was resignation. She accepted the fate that she would face at my hands. But I had a lot more to say before I actually did anything to her. And she would listen. She had no choice.

"All my life, I've been told what to do. And I've done it. I never let anybody down. Not even you, since I'm sure you never had any real expectations for me. I was just a pet you kept around. I may have loved you, but I know now the feeling wasn't mutual. That's okay though. Who would want the love of such a wicked witch?"

I fiddled with the arrow on my bow before I raised it. Naturally I pointed it at her heart and pulled back the string once again as I took aim. "I have your life in my hands now, just as I did in the Realm Between. I couldn't finish it then, but I sure can now. And I will."

As I took in one last breath, I gathered my courage to do what I should have done a long time ago. I shot off the arrow for its target. With the close proximity, it would have been a lethal hit if it actually pierced Isabella's heart.

That was why I changed my aim at the last minute. The arrow pierced the wall right next to her without doing any damage. The frightened witch, who shut her eyes at the last minute, opened them when she heard the thud of the arrow hitting the wall. It didn't hit her. It wasn't meant to. Shocked, she lifted her eyes to me.

"It's finished," I said confidently. Done. "I've put it behind me, Isabella. You've done evil with me, but I won't repay your evil with more evil. I'm not a killer. If you're meant to die, you will die. But it won't be by my hand."

With that, I turned around and started walking out of the room. I felt more peace than I had felt since finding out the truth about her. Everything was in destiny's hands from here. But my decisions were still mine, and I chose not to kill her. I chose not to do what was expected of me, or what was my right.

"Oh, and one more thing," I suddenly said, thinking of something I forgot to say before. I turned around and looked to the wall where Isabella was two seconds ago. But while my back was turned, she took the opportunity to teleport herself out of this fake world and away from me. Despite the fact that she couldn't hear me, I smiled and said my thoughts.

"I will never be your daughter."

My business was complete. I wordlessly turned around again and started out the exit again. My steps were lighter than they were before; a burden was taken off of my shoulders. I knew that I did what was right, morally and with myself. If I killed Isabella, she would have won in the end. She would have proved to me and to the world that she ruined me enough to turn me into a vengeful murderer. But she didn't have that power any more. She had nothing on me.

I entered the computer room of this false reality and saw that the computers were already destroyed. But the beam that would take me back to my Twilight Town was already shining strong. There was somebody waiting on the other side; I was sure of it. I had to face him.

Sighing to myself in anticipation, I took a few steps forward and touched the beam. A certain lightness surrounded me as I teleported to the other side, the other world where I belonged at that time. As soon as I opened my eyes, I noticed two people pacing at the rest leaning impatiently against different walls. King Mickey was at the computer trying to crack a code that would allow them to get to me, since the beam apparently only worked one way. Somehow they knew I was here, but that didn't matter now. All that mattered was that we were all together again.

My attention quickly shifted to the two men who stopped pacing the moment I came through the portal. Riku and my Dad both stared at me agape, finding their voices at the same time. "Steph!"

Immediately I started tearing up. In my dream world, my father wasn't strong enough to break through to me and bring me back. Maybe that was a sign he wasn't strong enough to stand up for me here either. But Riku was. I stepped out of the area and quickly walked up to the young man I loved, wrapping my arms around him as I broke down. "Riku," I sobbed into his shoulder, holding him tightly as I lost my composure. "I-I'm so sorry!" I cried. I should have trusted him. He was right all along in saying that I needed his guidance. He was right in saying that I was being reckless. And he was right about me being immature. I could only hope that he would take me back.

And he did. Instead of whispering "I told you so" in my ear, he wrapped his arms around me tightly and shushed me. "Shh," he insisted softly. He ran a hand over my brunette hair as I clung to him like a child clung to their parent when they were afraid. Still I didn't quiet down. If anything, I started crying harder because I was so touched by how easily he accepted me. As tears flooded out of my eyes, Riku lifted one of his hands and raised my chin so that I was looking up at him. It seemed like he had something to say so I opened my eyes and looked at him. He surprised me by smothering my cries with a kiss. The kiss burned with passion and love, but also gentleness and care. I kissed him back in the same manner, forcing my crying to calm so that I could kiss him back. He accepted me, completely. After a few moments, he released me from the kiss so that I could take in a breath. I took him up on that opportunity and leaned my head against his shoulder, sniffling once.

Again, Riku shushed me. "It's okay," he said softly, reassuringly. "Are you okay?" I nodded into his shoulder as more tears escaped my eyes and stained his vest. Did he even know that I wasn't crying because I was hurt? I was crying because of the regret. I felt so terrible for how I treated him lately. But I also felt so worn out now that I was back in this reality. Isabella was gone but I was here, and I had to face the consequences of my actions.

I had to rebuild the bridges that I burnt.

"Steph…You were taken by Isabella, but…" Sora was the one speaking, uncertainty coming through in his voice as he stumbled through this. "…Did you…Um…Where is she?"

"Gone," I said softly, turning my head out of Riku's shoulder and looking at the others in the room. For the first time since I got back, I was taking in their expressions. Kairi looked sorrowful for my sake, Sora was both sad and confused, and so was King Mickey. My Dad looked torn between being angry and sad. Most likely he was sad because I ran to Riku's arms when I got back, not his. I was Daddy's little girl, but Riku held my heart.

"Er…What do you mean, gone?" Sora inquired again.

"I did what I had to."

"…"

"And that was to let her go," I finished. Riku grunted in shock, but I knew that it was a good kind of shock. I looked up at him with moist eyes, though my tears were mostly gone by now. "I couldn't kill her, even after all that she did to me. Now I know it's not because I'm weak, but because I'm strong enough to not let her change me at my core."

"You could never become a murderer," my boyfriend finished for me, his voice hushed as he fully comprehended it all.

"Exactly," I responded with a small nod. Despite the horrible circumstances, Riku smiled. His smile was rare in the first place, so seeing it here made me feel so reassured. It felt like my heart could explode.

"I'm proud of you, Steph," Riku whispered in my ear, squeezing me more tightly as he continued to hold me in his embrace. My father was silent.

After a few moments of silence, we all seemed to realize what needed to be done next. I would need to summon all of my courage for this next task, because otherwise, I would crumble under the pressure. Facing my former mother was a big deal, but facing my real mom would be just as hard after all that happened between us.

Riku was the one who was brave enough to get the ball rolling. "Let's go home," he said quietly.

And we did.