Author's Notes: Oooooh! Things finally heated up and a lot of feels on both ends! Finally I have spring break; hopefully I get a lot done with this story before I have classes again. Hope you guys are enjoying it; I'll just shut up and get on with the story XD!
Bruce quickly went back to his room; he needed to be alone and away from Joker. Once there he was still breathing hard and raised a hand to his lips. God, what's wrong with him?! He actually let Joker kiss him and at some point he was kissing the madman back! He could feel his skin crawl but at the same time he felt so stimulated. The kiss was animalistic like a basic urge overwhelming all reason but there was something he couldn't look past besides the obvious fact that not only was Joker his enemy but also a man. The jester seemed so cold against him; it was like trying to breathe life back into a corpse. How could someone, who was so deadly and so immoral, incite such feelings? Joker was a villain, a madman, a psychopath and so much more… but Bruce couldn't help revel into that sudden kiss. Again Bruce felt torn from such contradicting feelings; he really just needed to be alone.
Alfred had noticed when his master rushed out of the cave and went to his bedroom. He couldn't get a word in to see what was wrong but his curiosity got the better of him as he descended the steps to the cave. He saw the video feed from Joker's cell and saw the lone man under the covers lying down on his side. He was facing towards the camera's general direction so the video captured the utter despair that lay hidden under his disheveled green locks. The butler was both shocked and astonished at the sight. Joker then closed his eyes and allowed a few tears to escape. Alfred thought he would ever see the day where Gotham's most ruthless criminal, the man who reveled in the graveyards he's filled and laughed at making the city bleed, look so human. The man was a living caricature of sick wickedness but in this fleeting moment he never looked so human. He wasn't sure what to do, should he enter and talk to him? Maybe that wasn't wise; the butler wasn't sure how the madman would handle him trying to pry into his private matters. But then again he might have something to do with his master's rather strange behavior. He went back upstairs to fetch some fresh sheets and blankets for the cell's cot; it would also provide an excuse to enter. When he returned to the cave he saw that Joker had pulled himself together and was sitting up right. He opened the metal door and saw that Joker was looking in his direction.
"Excuse the intrusion; I was merely coming in to exchange the sheets and blankets," spoke Alfred.
"Okay, I'll get out of your way," replied Joker indifferently as he got off and stepped aside. No plastered grin, no joke, no snide remark? There had to be something afoot.
"Is something the matter? You don't seem quite like yourself," the butler inquired as he changed the sheets. At this comment Joker began to let his smile break through.
"Isn't that a good thing Alfie? If I was being my usual self, well you'd be one dead butler," he grinned. Alfred gulped hard at that statement and looked in Joker's direction. "Eh, don't worry I won't do anything to you. I don't feel like my usual happy and deranged self to cause any mayhem," he sighed.
"Master Bruce was in here a moment ago, if I may inquire did something occur between you two?" asked cautiously the butler as to not raise suspicion that he knew something more.
"How the hell should I know ask him yourself," spat Joker.
"Well if I can recall, you did say you knew him better than anyone else," Alfred pressed further.
"Sheeesh, you sure are a chatty butler. First it was the 21 question game while we played chess and now this. What I meant was that I know the man ideologically wise. But when it comes to other matters I'm left in the dark with a wet match," admitted the clown as he clenched his fists.
"And what matters would that be?" questioned Alfred.
Joker let out a huge sigh and drew in a deep breath. At this point Alfred was finished changing the cot's sheets, placing down the new blankets and picked up the tray from the clown's breakfast. The jester took a seat in the middle of the bed and faced away the butler's gaze. "How – does it feel like… to be in love?" Joker asked hesitantly.
"Excuse me?" Alfred gasped out not knowing how else to react.
"Never mind, forget I said anything. Just get out," responded Joker in a low but at this point rather angry way. Alfred didn't mean to further upset the clown but hearing Joker, the Caliph of Clowns, the White Duke of Death, the Ace of Knaves, the Clown Prince of Crime; ask of love was just shocking. And if Alfred was piecing together the jester's signs correctly, Joker was in love with his master. Well right now was not the best time to find out as he already angered the madman. As he made his way to the exit he did pause to say something to the sad and lost clown.
"I'm not sure what's going on, but I will say one thing though. When one is in love they change to better themselves for the person they care for," spoke Alfred as he left. Joker let the message sink in and began to smile a bit.
"You don't say Alfie. Heh, something tells me that butler knows more than he leads on," mused the jester with a smile.
After that whole ordeal Alfred decided to see his master's take on this whole matter. Something was afoot and the butler was going to get to the bottom of it. He went up to Bruce's room with a platter of food at hand, again to fulfill his duty as a butler and to have an excuse to enter. He knocked on the door and called, "Master Bruce, I have your breakfast, may I enter."
"Of course Alfred, come in," replied his master. Alfred entered the bedroom and saw that his master was still in bed. He looked almost as troubled as the clown in the cave. The butler quietly set the tray of oatmeal that was slightly sweetened with honey and fresh berries on top, with a side of grapefruit and his morning coffee; down on his lap. Bruce immediately went for the coffee and washed down the sweet taste in his mouth from his kiss with Joker, with the bitter and black drink. He let out a sigh and noticed his butler seemed like he had something to say. "What's wrong?"
"Sir, I don't mean to press into your private matters, but did something occur between you and the Joker?" asked Alfred getting straight to the point.
"I'm not sure what you're talking about," answered Bruce as he scooped a spoonful of oatmeal, completely brushing off the question. But Alfred caught on, he knew Bruce long enough to know when he was trying to hide something from him.
"I went down to his cell sir…"
"What did he say?!" interrupted Bruce as he raised his voice and nearly knocked over his meal.
"Nothing of the matter, he didn't say a word about you being down there this morning. But he did ask me something that made me a bit concerned; I really want to know the truth. I think I know what's occurring here but I honestly want to hear it from you, Master Bruce," urged the butler for his master to come out and reveal what has been happening. The billionaire merely looked away from Alfred's gaze and shook his head.
"I don't even know if I know what's going on, Alfred," admitted Bruce. Alfred could see that his master was confused and troubled, he probably isn't aware that his greatest enemy might have feelings for him.
"Might I suggest something sir?" recommended the poised but considerate servant. Bruce met his eyes; open to anything that could possibly help him out of this maze of mixed up emotions and disordered thoughts. "Well, it's up to you; but I suggest you talk to him about it. I think it hard because of his evident crazed mind, but he can articulate his thoughts enough to engage in conversation."
"You don't know him like I do, he's impossible to deal with," muttered Bruce in defeat.
"That's why I propose you play it his way and not as the demanding detective," responded Alfred as an idea came to mind.
Joker was pacing back and forth in the cell for the last three or so hours, he wasn't sure anymore he'd lost count. Why was he acting so strange and so not like himself? It must be the room, he thought, he always did hate being cooped up for long periods of time. He could always try to escape; it shouldn't be all that difficult. But, deep down he honestly did want to stay. He was so close to his knight in black kevlar armor, closer than he ever was before. And he didn't even have to rob a bank or blow up the city, no schemes, no crime; just him and Bruce. "Oh what's the point anyway, I chased off my little bat. There's no way he's coming back in here," sighed the clown to himself as he ceased his incessant pacing and fell back into bed in defeat. Just then when he thought all hope was lost he heard the metal door to his cell open. He immediately sat up to see it was Bruce in his Batman costume except he didn't have the cape or cowl on and he was carrying a tray with a plate of stewed meat and potatoes with a tall glass of iced tea and what seemed like a deck of playing cards. "Well praise the lord my prayers have been answered," smiled the jester softly to himself.
"What did you say?" questioned the bat as he set the food in front of him.
"I said, I wasn't expecting you back today," Joker lied with a grin.
"It's six o'clock, I'm not about to let you starve," commented Bruce.
"You don't say…" wow he really lost track of time it's been well over seven hours. "Well anyways what's with the cards Bats?" he asked as he began eating his meal.
"I thought we could play a game," responded Bruce innocently as he got the fresh cards out of the pack.
"A game?!" he spoke with surprise, Batman never liked to play games. "Wait what's the catch?" asked the clown as he continued eating waiting for the detective to explain himself.
"We're going to play 21, we wager to ask a number of questions, the highest you can ask is five, winner gets his answered," explained the knight.
Sounded simple enough, mused the madman as he took sips at his drink. "So let me get this straight, if I win a round you'll answer anything I want? Honestly and truthfully?" asked Joker as he set the tray aside, deeming he'd had enough of the delicious food and was ready to play.
"So long as you abide by same rules Joker, then yes."
"Goody, then let's play! Mind if I shuffle?" Batman handed Joker the deck. Joker immediately removed the unnecessary joker cards not needing them to play this game and began shuffling the cards. Bruce had to admit the madman's skill with cards were very impressive. He admired how Joker's long white fingers handled the cards as he shuffled the cards with ease and finesse. "So what will you wager?"
"One question."
"Ditto, my dear bat," smiled Joker as he handed the cards. Bruce's pair got him a total of fifteen. The Joker had nineteen.
"Hit me," stated Bruce confidently. The jester complied as he gave his bat another card. It was a five of spades, giving Bruce the win.
"Alright you win, ask me anything Batsy," smiled Joker. The detective didn't know whether Joker would lie right at the beginning, he decided to play it safe.
"What's your inmate number in Arkham?"
"0801." He simply stated. Ok, so far so good. The next round Joker won, and that same round they each bet a single question. "What's your favorite color?" Was Joker serious? Maybe he was playing it safe too, testing the detective's honesty.
"I like black," replied Bruce.
"Well technically black's not a color, it's a shade, but all right," smiled the jester.
A few more rounds passed each of them asking simple and factual questions. It was time to get serious. "I'll bet one question," stated the Dark Knight.
"Likewise," replied The Clown Prince. Bruce won the round; he thought it best to start pressing the clown for some information.
"How many escape routes do you have in Arkham?" asked Bruce.
"Ooooh, playing hardball eh? All right, I have five escape routes out of the madhouse," smiled Joker. Great, now Bruce just needed to win another round to find their locations. "Let me guess, you bet five questions now?" Batman merely responded with a nod. "Okay, I'll stick with the one," stated the clown as he passed the cards. The bat had nineteen, the madman had eighteen, Joker took one more card and it was the three of hearts. "Lucky, me looks like I win," he smiled. Bruce was ready for whatever the jester was about to ask. "So, why did you leave me that night you embraced me to calm me down?" he asked with a sly but subtle smile.
Bruce wasn't really that prepared for that question. But he was obligated to answer honestly. He let out a sigh and began expressing his thoughts. "To be honest I'm not entirely sure. It was so strange seeing you that way. No offense but it honestly scared me; I wasn't sure what to do."
"I see, well I always knew my little bat was a bit unsure of himself… next round?" Joker said as he shuffled the cards without even looking at him, as if he wasn't satisfied with that answer. The next round Bruce won and got the locations of Joker's escape routes. He recorded the clown's description of each location and was surprised the ingenuity the jester had. He made note of checking these places later and sealing these escapes. "Sheeesh, can't stop thinking about work can you?" said the pale man rhetorically.
"Excuse me?" questioned the detective.
"Well, all you've asked me so far, aside from the first rounds where we were both trying to see if the other would lie are questions about work. I should've known better, you can never just play it's always work with you," answered bitterly as he handed the cards. "I'll bet one."
"Same," responded Bruce coolly. Maybe he should get off the subject of work. The whole point was to get Joker to confide in him honestly so he could get answers for all that's happened the last few days. Joker won that round, Bruce would have to wait to get his answers.
"You took up this whole Batman gig because of what happened to your parents right, what I want to know is why, aren't there easier ways to help this accursed city?"
Bruce swallowed hard; he really didn't want to talk about this, not to Joker at least. But since Joker was being so honest he couldn't back down exactly. "I became Batman because… what happened to me, after I lost them, I didn't ever want that to happen to someone else. As Bruce Wayne I can't stop crime, but as Batman I can do so much more," confessed Bruce.
"A lot of the people you protect claim you do more harm than good, doesn't that ever get to you? Ooops! Sorry, just remembered I already asked my one question. All right next round I'll keep it short and sweet and stick with the one, how about you sweetheart?"
"Same," Bruce repeated. "But I will answer your last question outside this game. It does get to me when I hear them say I am responsible for Gotham's grief when all I try to do is help. It makes me doubt my own actions, my whole reason, and my whole creed to save this city. Sometimes they do make me think I'm responsible, that I just created more problems."
"Like me…" said the jester softly. Bruce looked at the man that represented what most called his first mistake as Batman. The moment he let the nameless man in the Red Hood disguise fall into the canal of chemicals he unleashed a raving madman onto Gotham. But he couldn't tell Joker that, he wasn't sure how said madman would handle it. In a way Joker knew that the man in black felt directly responsible for whatever mayhem he caused in the city, but he kept his thoughts to himself and went on with the game. The Joker won yet another round and stared at the bat's unmasked face. Bruce was a bit frustrated, there were a few things he wanted to hear from Joker; he wanted to know about the Joker's dream, about these strange vibes he's been getting, but most of all he wanted an explanation about this morning, more specifically that passionate kiss between them. From all these clues and signs he was getting the feeling that his greatest and deadliest enemy was actually in love with him, or playing a very sick game with him. He didn't want to assume either; he wanted to hear it directly from the Joker's mouth. But if he kept losing this game he'd never find out.
"Does it make you sad Batsy, how alone you really are?" asked Joker with a quiet smile.
Bruce was taken aback by the question, what did he mean alone? "What are you talking about Joker?"
"How you struggle day after day fighting for others when in the end you're just so utterly alone," explained the jester further.
"I'm not alone I have Alfred and Jim and…"
"Oh I'm not saying that you don't have friends or your butler to have by your side and care about you. What I meant was that you're alone because none of them understand you," said Joker in between smiles and giggles. "How many times have they wished death on me, how many times have they doubted your actions and thought it would be so much easier if you just fixed your mistake and got rid of me? None of them understand how you see things, but I do, I see. Yet you won't let me in, you push the only one that can understand and that's why I say you're alone."
Bruce didn't want to play this game anymore; he put the cards back with the deck and got up. "I'm done."
"That's right walk away, I was counting cards anyway," grinned Joker.
Bruce turned and faced Joker with shocked but angry eyes. "What did you say?!"
"You heard me, you said I couldn't lie but never said I can't cheat in other ways. You only won because I let you have a few rounds," laughed the clown. Bruce came back to the cot and stood over the smiling madman. He grabbed Joker by the collar and raised him to his level. "Why so angry Bats?" Joker cooed innocently.
"I know why you cheated Joker," responded Bruce in a low growl. "You cheated because you have nothing to confess to me, nothing personal you wanted to say."
"What are you talking..."
"I opened myself to you, revealed things about myself I usually don't speak with others and you cheated because you can't do the same! You're empty Joker, you have nothing inside you and when you knew I would ask, you tried to hide and avoid it. You have NOTHING, you are empty Joker; do you hear me EMPTY! Even if you wanted to you can never connect with anyone, so in reality you're the one who is alone," Bruce said darkly and full of contempt.
Joker wasn't smiling anymore, he glared at Batman intently. He kept his teeth gritted tight and clenched his fists. "Don't you have a city to save or something!?" he said in a low but menacing whisper. Bruce shoved the clown back onto the cot and stormed off. Once out the cell he put on his cape and cowl to complete himself as Batman.