God Only Knows Chapter 3: Time To Train, a power rangers fanfic

God Only Knows
Chapter 3: Time To Train
By: Pink-Green-White-4ever
Started: April 21, 2010
Finished: May 22, 2010

Summary: The hardest part of faith is the last hour. - David Wilkerson
Rating: M
Characters: you'll see

Author's Note: Okay, so, this story is going to be a departure from some of the other stories I've done over the years, but in some ways, this story involves the one character I like to think I know best in the entire PR universe. This is not going to be a story returning the Rangers as we know them back to the way they were in the good 'ol days. The Rangers in this story have lives, real lives, and they're going through real, everyday experiences, and for one of those Rangers, it means discovering what she's really made of. Life has not been kind, nor will it be in this story. What this is, above all else, is a journey of self discovery, of finding who you are and what you're made of, and in the end, it's learning that in each of us, there's the power, no matter how vast or how small, to change the world.

Special Thanks: Shawn, thank you for listening to me plot and plan, and for giving me tips when you felt I needed it. Ang thanks for the enthusiasm and support. Enigma thank you so much for the constant faith in my work. Liz, my dear, thanks for being such a sweetheart! And last but not least, Rapunzl, thank you for the wonderful balance, the quiet strength, and the unwavering belief in me you give. You five don't know how much I appreciate it all, or how much you've enriched my life simply by being who you are. As Shawn once said, thank you doesn't seem enough. I love you works best

Please Visit http : / www . valhallaboard . com / forum / (without the spaces) - this is the multi-fandom message board I co-run with the five people in my "Special Thanks" section.

I feel so alone,
Can't seem to find my out of this low?
No, it don't seem right
I didn't have a chance to say goodbye.

In this silent space,
I close my eyes I can hear you say
That it's alright,
But my world's such an empty place tonight.
Cause I know that,
It's all part of life.

I wish I had the chance to say goodbye,
Yeah I still miss you.
So hard to see through the tears I've cried.
Yeah, I still need you.
Cause I don't want to,
If I don't have to ever let you go.
The longest I'll hold on... God only knows.

As the time goes by,
It gets a little easier to smile.
I know I'll never forget
Everything that you said.
You said it's alright,
It's all part of life.

And the lights above you will never fade if you keep looking up
Right around there is a better place if you believe in love.
Cause I know that, it's all part of life.

I wish I had the chance to say goodbye, yeah I still miss you.
So hard to see through the tears I've cried.\
Yeah, I still need you.
Cause I don't want to, if I don't have to ever let you go.
The longest I'll hold on, the longest I'll hold on.
The longest I'll hold on... God only knows.
God only knows.
Ya, God only knows.
God only knows.
- Orianthi, God Only Knows -

9:30 P.M.
Saturday
April 25, 2009
Emerald Dawn Martial Arts Academy

All four of them were sweaty, exhausted, and mentally ready to stop. Classes had been taught, individual lessons had passed, and now they were all in the back room, weapons in hand. Adam had nunchucks, Jason was twirling the bo staff in his hands while Tommy expertly wielded the two katanas around his body. Kim stood on the mats, testing the weight of the sword in her hands. It was a wooden Kendo practice sword, as the guys knew she wasn't ready to use a real one.

Tommy watched her warm up, taking practice swings to adjust her grip and the feel of the weapon. She didn't look as unsure as she had a week before when he'd placed it in her hands, but he could tell she was still uncomfortable handling it. After all, she'd spent three years with bow and arrow, it was an adjustment to change weapons.

Her resolve to face this challenge drew such a deep pride and admiration from him. Kimberly, the vivacious girl he'd known, had always looked her fears head on and faced them. The woman she'd become had been crippled by devastating loss and amplified fear. She was slowly rebuilding her shattered world, but Tommy knew this new mission was going to push her to her limits, and beyond. She was going to rail against that push, but she'd do what needed to be done. Kimberly had never shirked her duty, now was no different.

"Ready?" Tommy called out to her, startling her briefly as she looked up at him.

"As I'll ever be," she muttered.

With a nod from the former Ranger leader, Adam launched his attack. Kim spun on her heel, swinging out with her sword to deflect Adam's weapon. Clicking was heard with each strike of wood on wood. As Adam brought his legs up to kick her, Kim ducked low, striking out with her sword as she somersaulted away from where he was landing. Adam spun back around to face her and smiled. Kim knelt on one knee, the sword held tightly in her left hand, keeping it perpendicular to her body across her chest. She stared at him over her arm, eyes narrowed.

"Nice," Jason grinned, then tossed Adam the bo staff. Adam smirked and began to twirl the staff, moving toward her as he did. His eyes focused on Kim, and waited for her to make a move. She charged him, slashing with the sword and found herself falling forward. Adam followed through by smacking her across the shoulders with the end. Kim let out a startled cry as she lost control of her sword and crashed face first into the mat. She groaned for a second before the guys realized her nose was bleeding.

"You okay?" Tommy asked, helping her up. He caught the towel Jason tossed and pressed it to her nose.

"Fine," she mumbled around the towel.

"I think that's enough for tonight," Jason called out.

"No," Kim gripped Tommy's hand. "Is it bad?"

Tommy shook his head. "Give yourself a few minutes. "Adam, ice pack?"

The Asian man nodded and headed out. He came back a moment later with a frozen blue ice pack and another towel. Tommy took them and pressed the wrapped object to Kim's forehead. A few minutes later, when Kim pulled the towel form her nose and tested it with her fingers, she smiled. "We're good."

"Be careful," the former White Ranger warned before getting off the mat.

"Wanna switch?" Adam asked, gesturing to the staff in his hand.

"Sure," she grinned, tossing the sword and reaching for the staff. The guys watched her test the weight and her grip. Due to the staff being taller than her, Kim found it was awkward to handle.

"Try this one," Jason told her a moment later, moving to hand her another staff. Kim grinned, realizing the one Jason gave her was almost a foot shorter, and surprise, surprise, it was pink and silver. It was also lighter, lending itself to an easier motion in her arms.

"Perfect," she giggled, spinning it easily around her body.

Adam stepped up, sword in hand. "Ready?"

Kim nodded and the two began. Adam found she was a quicker study with the staff, using it's length to her advantage. He could never get quite close enough to strike her before she'd smack him with one of the ends. Letting out a triumphant cry, Kim swung low, knocking Adam off his feet. The staff was extended behind her, her left hand gripping it when she completed the swing. Jason and Tommy let out identical yelps when Kim's body vaguely started glowing white. Before any of them could utter a single word, a gentle breeze seemed to flow across the room, originating from the petite brunette. Jason reached Kimberly first while Tommy moved to help Adam to his feet. "Kim?" Jason quietly murmured his voice barely audible. He didn't dare touch her, his days as a Ranger having taught him better.

She cocked her head to the right, as if listening to him. Her eyes were glowing white, the pupils completely gone. Jason felt the power coil inside her as if readying to strike. "Control, Guardian," an unfamiliar voice ordered.

Cautiously, Jason turned his head to the door and let his eyes widen. The figure was half man, half woman. It took him a few seconds to realize who it was. "Rain," Adam greeted.

"You look well, Teacher, despite the thorough trouncing you just received," Rain grinned. Without invitation, Rain walked into the room and moved toward Kimberly. In the process, the female portion seemed to melt away. Rain motioned for Jason to move back. "Protector, I will not harm her, you have my word. My respect for Zordon's chosen runs deep."

Tommy and Adam both put a hand on Jason's shoulder, drawing him back. "I'm fully prepared to believe anything you say now," Jason muttered to Adam, receiving a smile from the former black and green Ranger.

"Peace, Guardian," Rain murmured to Kim, his hands in front of him, palms facing the former Ranger in a show of peace. His smile was slow as the whirling glow of white slowly subsided from her eyes, the normal doe brown returning.

"Who are you?"

"They call me Rain," he murmured, bowing before her. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

Kim looked dazed, her eyes widening when he took in her body's position. "What's….going on?" Stiffly, she stood, dropping the staff at her feet as she did so. "Guys?"

Cautiously, the three neared her. Tommy was the first to her side; reaching out, he ran a hand up and down her back in a gesture meant to soothe and reassure. Kim seemed to instinctively lean closer to him, away from Rain.

"Why are you here?" Adam finally demanded to know.

Rain's face betrayed none of the turmoil he was feeling. "I'm afraid things have changed on the other side. The balance is shredding, fast."

"Balance?"

The man before them looked incredibly frustrated. "In every generation, there is a guardian," he began his tale, hoping to explain to Kimberly what was happening to her life. "The forces of good and evil have been waging a war since time began. They've fought for one thing, and one thing only – the key to letting them get the upper hand, the one who will shatter the balance. This key is known as the Guardian."

Kim stiffened, unconsciously shrinking back toward Tommy even more. "Me?"

Rain nodded. "The one you knew as Rita was once the Guardian, and she held vast amounts of power. She was seduced by Hayden to the dark, and lost much of what she held dear as a consequence."

The four cringed, realizing how the Mystic Mother Xander spoke of had come to be. "If there's one every generation, why are you bothering with me? Surely another one has been born by now."

"I'm afraid you're wrong," Rain sighed, shaking his head. "Never before has a Guardian had an active link to the Morphin' Grid, nor has any every come from Earth. And for some reason, we've not yet found the Guardian who's to come after you."

While Kim trembled, the guys closed ranks around her. Rain's face was grim. What he was about to tell her was going to shake the foundation of what she knew. "There were rumors several centuries ago that a key would be found on Earth. After defeating Zedd during one of their wars, Zordon came here in search of the key. When he didn't find it, he stayed, hoping to enjoy the peace he found here. He knew, however, that Rita's dumpster had landed on your moon, so it gave him another mission – guard the dumpster and call on new Rangers if she ever broke free."

"And she did," Tommy hissed angrily. The four Rangers knew all too well what had happened once she'd gotten free.

Rain nodded, already knowing where their thoughts were. "Right after you became a Ranger, Thomas, Zordon found the key. When Zedd came, Zordon did all he could to protect Kimberly."

"He made my choice for me?" Kim's question was strangled by the sob working its way up from her chest. They had all had virtually no choice in being Rangers; Zordon had guilt tripped them into it.

"No. At any time, you could have left the Rangers; at any time, you could have joined Zedd. Didn't he try and persuade you to be his queen?"

"But Zordon never told me!" Kim argued back, anger rising.

Choosing his words carefully, Rain took a deep breath. "No, he didn't. He made the mistake of not properly preparing you because he became emotionally attached to you," he told her, watching her eyes fill. "After Zedd and Rita stripped you of your powers, Zedd assumed he'd been mistaken. Zordon knew better. As long as he lived, you were protected."

Kimberly felt a sickening sense of dread start to fill her. Maligore and Dark Spector had to have known… "Why did he really leave Earth?"

Rain shrugged but Kim's steady gaze made him squirm. "As I said, a long as he lived, it was assumed you'd be safe. Added, you were no longer a Ranger…"

"Did he draw Dark Spector's attention away from here, away from Kim?" Jason demanded.

"Yes."

The Rangers who'd once served under Zordon had always borne the guilt of having not been able to save him. Now Kim would bear more of that guilt than the others, knowing he'd died to protect her. A different form of grief settled over the former Pink Ranger's heart. She felt weak under the weight of it; yet another person she'd loved had been lost, only in a different way than originally thought.

"As to why I'm 'bothering' with you, you alone hold the power of the Morphin' Grid. Which ever side obtains that will be unstoppable."

The room around him was pitch black, save for the red glowing pool that allowed him to view the happenings of this world and it's Key. His lips peeled back in a horrible snarl as the five figures in the pool drew his anger. The lone female among them seemed to shrink back into the safety of her friends. It was pitiful knowing she held the power to destroy world. This weak, pathetic human female was the ancient, prophesied key.

It was laughable.

In his anger, a blood red lightning bolt shot out of his fingers. Zedd's idiotic and pathetic attempts had tried his patience for far too long. Hinting for Dark Spector to capture Zordon had been genius; kill two birds with one stone – Zedd and Zordon, dead and gone – leaving the key for the taking. The added bonus was that one of Zordon's own had been responsible for his death; poetic justice in his opinion. The image of the former Black and Green Ranger enraged him even further. The idiot human wasn't supposed to have power anymore; they were all supposed to be powerless! It was a minor complication, an irritation really. With access to Ranger powers, the Teacher had an unexpected link to the Guardian. He knew he'd have to be careful that the former Rangers didn't realize they could use it in their favor.

11:30 A.M.
Monday
April 27, 2009
Parker, Parker, Grimes and Associates

"Kimberly?" Elise called through the intercom.

Leaning over, Kim picked up the phone and in a harried voice, asked, "Yes?"

"I know you just got here, but Viv, Stefano and Sere are busy or out of the office and the other associates have clients. We've got a potential client sitting in reception. They'd like a consult."

Kim blew out a breath, trying to get her frustration to go away; she already had more on her plate than she was prepared to take yet. "Give me ten minutes to clean up my office. Family or Business?"

"Business, I think. He really hasn't said."

"Ten minutes."

"Gotcha."

Hanging up the phone, Kim headed down the hall for a quick bathroom break and back to her office to clean up her desk. She was working on three legal briefs for cases Serenity had taken on, she had a consult coming at noon and she still need to brush up on a few details pertaining to a case Stefano wanted her to sit in on. She had a minute to spare before Elise brought the potential client back to her office. Her heart froze and iced over when she saw who it was.

Hayden.

"Thank you," Kim told the secretary, hoping to get her out of the line of fire quickly. Once the door was firmly shut, she glared at the man. "Why are you bothering me?"

"How rude you humans are," he uttered. "I'm beginning to think you don't like me, my lady."

"Perceptive, because I don't like you."

"But you like Kallisto?" he lazily asked, leaning forward to take the picture frame off her desk. It was a snapshot of her, Chris and Evan from the Christmas just days before they died. "Your family is gorgeous and so precious."

"They were."

"It's a shame they're dead. Your perfect life – destroyed by one careless, selfish act."

Kimberly's body trembled; not with fear, but with white hot, blistering rage. She'd be damned if she let this creep ruin the memory of her husband and son. "Leave them out of this!" she hissed angrily.

"What if I told you I could bring them back? Make life like it was, before the accident."

Her rage drained out of her so swiftly it left her swaying. Pressing a hand to her desk to steady herself, Kimberly stared at him. "Excuse me?"

"What would you do if I told you I could bring them back? I have the power to undo the one incident that changed your life."

"Why?"

He smiled charmingly. "I like you, Kimberly. Genuinely like you. You're beautiful, talented, courageous, and you've got a healthy temper. I respect that, and what you've made of your life since leaving the Rangers."

Her heart throbbed painfully in her chest. He was giving her the chance to have her family back. He could undo the damage; give her back her baby and her partner. All the horrible moments could be undone. Kimberly the wife and mother trembled at the idea; Kimberly the former Ranger narrowed her eyes. "What's the catch."

"So suspicious."

"You bet, so sue me. What's the catch?"

"If I give you back your family, I want you to help me end this war."

Kimberly licked her lips. "How am I to know you're telling me the truth?"

He grinned and winked. "Intelligent. A show of faith? When you get home today, you'll see I was telling you're the truth." With that, Kim watched him get up and leave, her heart hammering painfully in her chest.

6:00 P.M.
Kim's House

When she pulled into the driveway, her anxiety level was almost through the roof. Nothing about the house looked different – it was just the way she'd left it that morning. Taking a deep breath, she grabbed her briefcase and jacked and headed inside. Nothing seemed out of place in the foyer, until she went to kick off her pumps and saw the two sets of tennis shoes on the rug – one a size thirteen men's and the other a size four in boy's. She dropped her jacket and briefcase on the floor and wildly looked down the hall toward the kitchen and up the staircase. And then she heard the giggling.

Fists clenched, she moved as quietly as possible toward the kitchen. Her heart soared at the sight she was greeted by. He stood at the stove, stirring a pot of spaghetti sauce. He was wearing a pair of ancient Levi's and a blue dress shirt. Hi arm was around the little body perched on a dining room chair, hand over the smaller one as they stirred. Her eyes welled at the sight.

"Mommy's going to be so surprised that you made her dinner," his warm baritone told their little boy.

"Yay!" the little boy lifted his voice. "I like surprising Mommy!"

She couldn't find her voice. She felt all the moments, the bad ones, slip away like a bad dream. It felt like she was waking up to a dream come true. Her eyes filled as she watched Chris help Evan off the chair, the two turning and letting out shocked yelps when they saw her. "Mommy!"

"Sweetheart," Chris grinned.

Kimberly caught Evan in her arms, crushing him to her chest while he babbled about dinner. She knew her eyes were wild, and knew Chris saw it too. Without even having to ask, she felt him wrap her arms around them both. "Evan, go upstairs and wash up for dinner," Chris urged. She knew he was trying to talk to her without Evan seeing her break down.

"'Kay!" Evan shouted, wiggling out of her arms and racing up the stairs.

Chris reached out and tugged her into his arms, tucking her head under his chin. "What's wrong?" he quietly asked, stroking his hands over her back. "You have a bad day?"

Pressing her lips together, Kim shook her head. Reaching up, she wrapped her arms around his neck and held on. It felt so surreal, having him hold her again. All she wanted to do was close her eyes and hang on. "Kimberly, sweetheart?"

"I'm okay, it's just been a really long day," she explained, taking a deep breath before she stepped back. "So, spaghetti?"

"Evan's idea, he wanted to surprise you," he grinned, leaning forward to kiss her softly on the lips. "Hungry?"

"Starving. Let me go change, then let's eat," she smiled before pulling away from him to head upstairs.

An hour later, with the food put away and dishes done, the two of them stood in the doorway leading to the back deck. Evan was racing around the yard, despite having eaten far more at dinner than normal, chattering about building a tree house and wanting to go swimming. Leaning against the door jamb, Kim smiled at his antics, nodding when he called out to her to watch him. "How one kid can have so much energy is beyond me," Chris chuckled, sliding his arms around her waist, his chin resting on top of her head.

"I wish I could bottle some of it to use later," Kim laughed, leaning back against his chest. She felt so warm and secure, like nothing bad could ever happen.

Silence settled between them, until Chris' lips nuzzled her ear. "I've been thinking," he started, his breath hotly caressing her skin.

"About?" she sighed softly.

"Well, Evan's almost six, as you pointed out not long ago," he breathed. "We're doing fairly well with our finances…"

"Chris?" she choked, eyes wide as she turned to stare at him. "Are you saying…"

"Are you ready for another one?" he teased, rubbing his nose against hers as her eyes welled. The smile that lit her face was more spectacular than any he'd ever seen. Leaning forward, he let his lips caress hers gently but with growing passion. He pulled back a little, smirking like mad when she moaned her displeasure at him leaving her hanging. "I really want a little girl this time, one who looks just like you."

She let out a peel of laughter, wrapping her arms around his waist and holding on. "I just want a healthy baby," she told him. Her eyes narrowed at the impish look that crossed his face. "What?"

"Think of all the fun we're going to have," he whispered erotically.

Closing her eyes, Kim laughed and kissed him soundly. Her world felt stable and sound again, as if everything else was just a bad, bad dream.

4:45 A.M.
Tuesday
April 28, 2009

Shivering, Kimberly tugged the blankets up to her chin and blinked weary eyes. The alarm's red digits red a quarter to five, making her groan. She wanted to snuggle back into bed, to have Chris wrap his arms around her, and block out the rest of the world. With a sigh, she reached behind her to grab his arm and found nothing but empty space. Confused, she pushed the covers off and sat up, looking over at his side of the bed. Her eyes narrowed when she saw the covers precisely made, as if no one had slept on that side of the bed the night before. Chris never made the bed like that, at least not until they were both out of it. And besides, he should still be passed out; they'd been up late last night, getting started on making that second baby they wanted so badly.

Shaking her head, she crawled out of bed, grabbed her robe and headed out into the hallway. Quietly, she hurried to Evan's room, peeking inside. Where last night there had been bunk beds, a desk, and toys galore, now there was her home office – her desk littered with papers, her computer, pictures of her friends and family. One wall contained the bookcase that doubled as a showcase of all her medals, degrees, and other awards. Stifling a sob, she turned and fled down the stairs.

She searched every room, nook and cranny of the house, but instead of finding all the little mementos and articles belonging to her husband and son, all she found were her own things, sitting where her friends had unpacked them. Her breath came in shallow gasps as her chest tightened and her voice caught. Yesterday had been so real, they'd been here, as if nothing bad had ever happened. Her hope and faith was once again shattered; it had all been make believe. They weren't alive, they weren't in this house with her, they weren't coming home. The guttural sobs that exploded from her throat surprised her in their intensity. Shaking her head to try and ward off the stinging tears that welled in her eyes, she thundered up the stairs in search of her cell phone. She found it on the bedside table, snatching it up as she went to sit on the floor in the corner by the window. Fumbling it open through the veil of her tears, she punched the speed dial button. It didn't matter that she was probably calling him before he'd even be up, it didn't matter that it was a school day and that he had classes, she needed him.

"Whoever this is better be dead or dying," the voice on the other end growled when the ringing stopped.

"T-t-tommy!" she cried out, rocking back and forth in the corner.

"Kim?" he chirped, obviously alerted by the tone of her voice and her crying. "What's wrong?"

"I need you!"

8:00 A.M.

"Bro, are you sure you don't need me?" Jason's voice came through the speaker of Tommy's cell phone. The former White Ranger was stretched out on Kimberly's couch with her tucked in his arms, finally sound asleep. When she'd called three hours before, it had nearly given him a heart attack, but he hadn't thought twice about calling in to school and taking a personal day so he could be with her. It had taken him nearly an hour and a half to get from Reefside to Angel Grove, and when he'd gotten to the house, he found a nearly catatonic Kimberly waiting for him. One look at her grief stricken face and he'd merely shut the door, scooped her up and taken her to the living room. She still hadn't told him what happened, but he had a feeling he wasn't going to like it one bit.

"Positive. She's sound asleep right now, and I'm probably going to conk out and catch a few myself. Once I get the full story out of her, we'll go from there," Tommy reassured his oldest friend. "Whatever happened, it had to have been a lot, she's never sounded like that before, not even at the funeral."

Tommy could hear Jason blow out a tension-filled breath. "Alright. I'll be at the office until about noon, then I have an on-site in Burbank, so I'll be heading that way. If you need me, call my cell. If I don't answer…"

"I'll leave a message with Anna to have you call me. I know the drill. Relax, Adam's only a half hour away at most, if something happens, we've got back up."

"Alright. Catch ya later."

Reaching over, Tommy grabbed his phone and closed it, effectively ending the phone call. He looked down at Kimberly's face and noticed that the tension and worry lines were still marring her brow. She may have not moved since she passed out in his arms, but she was doing anything but sleeping peacefully. Shaking his head, Tommy did the only thing he could do – he held her. Leaning down, he gently kissed her forehead and then reached up, smoothing his thumb between her eyebrows. He smiled slightly when her face relaxed and she nuzzled close to him. "It's going to be okay, Beautiful, I'm right here," he whispered, hugging her close as his own eyelids grew heavier and heavier. The stress of the morning finally caught up with him and he drifted off to sleep.

9:30 A.M.

She was warm, as if she was cocooned in a safe, quiet place. Blinking her eyes rapidly, she saw that she was staring at the television screen, the morning sun coming in from the hallway. She knew almost instantly she was lying on a hard, muscular chest, and then everything came rushing back. The night before, waking up that morning, her frantic call to Tommy, him coming all the way from Reefside to be with her, him scooping her up and carrying her to the couch – it all came back in a huge wave of emotion. She remembered crying in his arms, not able to express why she'd made the call that morning to him. Obviously, he'd known she'd needed him, one way or another.

Working up her courage, she gently shifted, looking up at him. His face was composed in sleep – mouth slightly open as he breathed, thick lashes lying against his skin, hiding his beloved chocolate eyes. His jaw was as strong and defined as ever, roughened by the shadow of his beard, which he'd not taken care of that morning. It was a face she knew so well, one she often wondered if she knew better than her own. He'd been one of her best friends for over half her life now; he'd seen her through some of her worst and best moments, and always, he'd been by her side, supporting whatever decisions she'd made in life. And he'd never hesitated to be there for her when she called. It was a reminder, yet again, at how lucky she'd been to have been loved by not only Chris, but by this extraordinary man currently holding her. Just like the love she'd been given from her husband, the love she'd received from Tommy, both in friendship and romance, had fed her soul and given her wings to fly.

She knew it was the reason she'd called him this morning, the reason his number had been the first she'd dialed; she knew she was safe with him, she knew that she could tell him the hurts and he'd try and fix them, that she could give him her thoughts without fear of him taking advantage of them or brushing them off as the wanderings of an overactive imagination. There were just some things she couldn't and wouldn't share with Aisha, or Jason for that matter. While she loved them both deeply, there was a unique bond between her and Tommy that had transcended everything they'd been through, and all that they'd done to each other. Forged in the heat of battle, tempered by friendship, deepened by love and strengthened by time, it was one of the things she cherished most in the world, one of the few constants she had. And after the horrible nightmare of the last two days, her mind and heart had been one when they'd made the decision to tell him first, to ask him for his help. He'd understand, just like he always had.

"Hey," a husky voice greeted, drawing her from her thoughts. Tilting her head back a little more, chocolate met doe brown. "Feeling better?"

She couldn't speak, so she merely nodded. Taking a deep breath, she laid her head on his shoulder and just stared straight ahead. She was struggling how to word what she needed to tell him. Part of her told her she should probably get up, let Tommy up from his position on the couch, because she didn't belong in his arms after all, but she felt too content, too peaceful and loved to move. For once, she was going to indulge herself and remain exactly where she was. "Kim?"

"Give me a few minutes," she whispered, rubbing her cheek against his chest. There was a tiny voice inside her head screaming at her for betraying Chris and his memory by lying like this with Tommy, but she pushed it away. While their position smacked of something deeper than friendship, she knew it wasn't true. They were friends, as they'd always been and always would be. She was still mourning her family, and after last night, that grief was even fresher than before.

"Take your time, Beautiful, I'm not going anywhere," he murmured, rubbing a hand down the back of her head and down her back before coming back up to wrap around her body, holding her close.

Wetting her lips, she sucked in a deep breath and started. "I had a visitor yesterday, at the office."

"Who?"

"Hayden," she responded, feeling him stiffen underneath her. She bit back the smile that wanted out when he cursed underneath his breath and drew her closer. "He asked me to help him end the war."

"And what did he say when you told him no?" Tommy all but demanded.

"I didn't exactly tell him no," she told him. She knew she couldn't look up into Tommy's eyes, because his body signals were giving his shock and horror away clear as day. "He told me, if I helped him, that he'd give me the one thing I want most."

"And what is that?" he asked, though he already knew.

"He said he'd give me back Chris and Evan."

Tommy's eyes closed as his breath whooshed out of his chest. Tightening his arms around her, he fought to keep his voice even. "Kimberly, you know he can't do that; they're gone, Beautiful, nothing can bring them back."

"But he did!" her voice cracked on a sob. "He said it was a show of faith, that he'd give me a taste of what I wanted! When I got home from work last night, they were here!" she cried. Tommy's arms were practically vice grips on her body, holding her so hard she almost thought she'd break. "They were here, making dinner. We had spaghetti, and then Chris and I watched Evan play in the backyard, just like we used to back in Miami!"

Making reassuring sounds, Tommy cradled her head against his chest and kissed the top of it. "It's okay," he told her.

"Before the accident happened, we'd started discussing maybe having another baby," she hurried on. "Things were going so well, but Chris was worried we were putting in too many hours at work and Evan wasn't getting enough attention as it was, so we put it off. Last night, when he was here, he told me he wanted to start trying!" she couldn't go any further in her explanation as she was now full force crying. It had broken her heart all over again this morning to find that yesterday afternoon and the long, romantic night that had followed was nothing but a dream.

"Oh Kim," Tommy whispered, rocking her gently. "I'm so sorry."

"I woke up this morning, cold, wanting to cuddle. When I reached for him, he wasn't there. I panicked, and got up to go see if he was in Evan's room. All I found were my things; Evan's room was my office again, none of their things were down here or in the kitchen. I lost it. I barely remember going upstairs to call you."

Tommy said nothing, found he could say nothing, to soothe the grief she was experiencing, the ache that was hollowing out her heart. He'd been unable, for all his vaunted skills, to stop her suffering a year before; it seemed he was as helpless now as he'd been then. His years as a Ranger, as a leader, as a teacher, as a warrior, they all felt as if they were for naught as he continued to hold this woman who was a beloved friend and the object of his teenage desires as she fell apart over the loss of husband and child. Again. He didn't know what to say to her, didn't know if he should ask her the things he wanted answers to, so he remained silent, and let her cry out her heartache.

And he was afraid; afraid that whatever Hayden was offering her would be more temptation than she'd be able to handle, that having her husband and her child back would be more important than saving the world. Tommy had no doubt that Hayden would do and say anything to her to get her to help him and then he'd double cross her in the end – she wind up losing her family and betraying her planet and her legacy.

"Kimberly…"

"What?"

"Are you thinking of joining him?" Tommy choked on the words even as he said them. Closing his eyes, the Falcon within cried so shrilly he thought his eardrums would burst. A betrayal of that kind from her of all people…he'd never survive it.

"I don't know." For the first time in a long, long time, the former Ranger leader felt his heart simply shatter.