*Secret life of the American Teenager belongs to Brenda Hampton, I in no way on the character or plot except for Joseph, he's mine…

Ricky's PoV

I'd been thinking about her a lot lately, Amy. She was so different from everyone else in this town. I know it's a bad idea for me to even think I have feelings for her, but I think I do. Lately, I've been avoiding her at school, it's like she doesn't even exist. It's not like I do it to be mean, I do it because of Adrian. Usually, I wouldn't care about what was the best interest for Adrian, this time it was different though. I knew that Adrian had pure hate for Amy and I didn't want to see Amy crumble or kill Adrian before my eyes. Learning about Amy's issues made me feel like I had to protect her.

She so open that night, her feeling were raw and intimidating. No one has ever been so real with me, well not a stranger anyway. Why did this girl feel the need to trust me and tell me all her secrets? I don't even know her last name. I'd become her confidant in that moment, she had been holding so much in. How one could go through life keeping who they really are hiding deep inside of them had to be hell. Amy could never be herself, her true self, around her peers, not even at home. For some reason, I wanted to be the one she could be herself around. Pushing those thoughts aside, I slammed my locker shut.

Adrian had been ignoring me since I rejected her a couple weeks ago. Honestly, I was grateful for the silence, for my space. I'd forgotten how nice peace and quiet was since those were attributes that Adrian wasn't composed of. My body needed a break from her and it was rewarding me when it finally got it. I felt more alive, more of a person, if that makes any sense at all.

"What's going on with you and my sister?" I was caught off guard by the question because I had no idea where it came from. I had become so lost in my thoughts that I barely realized the sea of people floating around. Looking behind me, my eyes fell on a short girl with long dark hair and the demeanor of a murderer.

"No offense, but I don't even know who your sister is, let alone you," The girl let out an incoherent noise.

"Amy, what's going on with you and Amy? I know you two have something going on or something. My friend told me," If Amy was her sister, I definitely couldn't see the resemblance… anywhere. Though, Amy did mention a sister to me a couple weeks ago. That's beside the point right now.

"What? I barely talk to your sister, plus I do have a girlfriend, so your friend must have me confused with someone else," Becoming annoyed quickly, like I always do, I turned to walk off, but the Amy's sister grabbed my arm. "Look ki-"

"No, you look; you better watch your back messing with Amy. You don't know her like I do, she's a bitch all the time, and she's mean and heartless. She'll swear to everyone she's changed, but she hasn't," Her whole exterior was intimidating. This girl either wanted to look out for her sister or didn't want anyone to like her. I'd choose the latter. I don't understand how she could stand here and bash her sister without a look of guilt in her eyes. There was no hesitance in her words.

"Okay," there wasn't anything else I could really say. My mind was trying to wrap around the fact that Amy and this girl are actually related. Suddenly, the girl was like a deer caught headlights, she stormed away; her steps were tense and stiff.

"Uh, I hate her," I perked up inwardly and turned to see Amy leaning on the lockers. There was a look of disgust on her face. "What the hell did she want?" She was in a mood; I'd been noticing small things like this about her. Her tone was nonchalant and withdrawn.

"So, that's your sister?" Stuffing my hands in my jean pockets, I mirrored her and leaned on the lockers. A strand of hair fell in her face and I tackled down the urge to push it behind her ear.

"My parents would like to think so," Amy said shrugging her shoulders and pursing her lips, which wasn't helping me at all. Trying to focus my gaze on something or someone else, I realized that we were the only people in the hallway, aside from a few stragglers late for class.

"What's her name?" I asked trying to make conversation so I wouldn't focus on the drumming of my heart.

"Why?" She looked at me curiously without a blink. I wasn't even sure if she was breathing.

"Because, I don't want to walk around calling her that girl or Amy's sister all the time. Plus, she seems pretty cool," I wasn't sure why I lied. Amy chuckled in disbelief and glanced at the floor.

"Trust me that girl is just fine and she is not cool, don't worry yourself with getting to know her, she's a loner and she likes it that way. Ashley doesn't want any friends, I know that for a fact," There was obviously some sibling bitterness they had towards one another. Amy crossed her arms over her chest and bit the corner of the bottom of her lip, she was thinking.

"When we were talking, she mentioned a friend," The confusion must have been written all over my face. Amy shrugged and shook her head slightly.

"She was probably lying, although, she isn't much of the lying type so there's a possibility she's telling the truth, but," Amy didn't finish her thoughts. Removing herself from the locker, she moved closer to me. She searched my face and then chuckled to herself lowly and walked off. That wasn't weird at all. Rotating my body I watched her walk down the hallway giggling to herself. Then, there was a guy beside her, he'd come out of nowhere, his arm was wrapped around her shoulders. I couldn't get a clear look at his face, but I didn't care who he was, in that period of time I felt betrayed by her. She'd given some guy the opportunity to capture her heart and not me, damn. The couple escaped through the front door of the school and I realized that Amy was more than a mystery; she was unfathomably unclear to read.

Anne's PoV

So, it was wrong for me to keep secrets from one daughter and not the other, but I knew that Amy couldn't handle it. Her mind wasn't in its proper place and I knew she could relapse on a lot of things. She'd been doing so well, and I don't want her to go back to the way she used to be. In yet, this situation has been eating at me, we should be handling this as a family. If George were here, he'd know what to do, well maybe not; he was never good with these sorts of things. The thought made me smile. I missed my husband.

I hated spending cold night huddled up in my blankets, only wishing they were George. I hated going downstairs in the morning and expecting him to be there, making pancakes. He was truly my better half. I had no idea what loneliness was until I lost my husband with no warning. That made me realize that you could never expect life to deal you a good hand. You never knew one your number was pulled and when it was, you had to go, no ifs, ands, or buts about it. Soon, I would be following my George, but I was hoping not too soon.

Honestly, there was no fight in me, I was tired. Sure, I was young, but I was tired, I'd been dealing with so much since the day of Ashley's birth. Amy's outbursts and late night tears took everything away from me. My body needed rest, actual rest, not just a good sleep. I hated the thought of leaving my girls behind, but life had dealt me a bad hand.

Ashley didn't know how sick I was, she just knew that some days I wouldn't be able to get out of bed. My heart was aching for my babies and I realized that maybe I should sit them down and talk to them about what was going on, hopefully that could talk up the fight in me again.

(9 Years Ago) Joseph's PoV

He came to me asking for help. George had personally inducted himself back into the family by showing up at my house. It had been years since I'd seen him. This was the first time that I'd talked to him since that violent day, the day that his wife had nearly been killed. That was the day that he gave up the mafia lifestyle. Now, he was back, asking for a favor.

"Listen Joe, I know… I know that I've probably burned this bridge, but I need your help with something," His face was war beaten. The stress lines were everywhere and he was beginning to fidget. Something was eating away at his mentality.

"Why should I help you George?" I was being stubborn as usual. George knew what to expect from me, so he straightened his back and looked me in the eye. He still had it; I knew his backbone wouldn't disappear when he left the family.

"I'm as much a part of this family as you are, I've always been," I chuckled lowly and smirked at George. I shoved my fingers slowly through my hair. George never broke his gaze from mine.

"You're right George you have burned this bridge. You turned your back on the most important thing in our little world," I leaned on the wall beside my desk.

"The most important thing in my 'little world' is my family, not my mafia family, my wife and daughters, that's who I'm protecting now, them, not you," I flinched at his words. They were cold and honest. George had grown up, grown away from the dangers that we both once loved. He'd matured into the man that my father knew he would be. I condoned him, as a friend.

"Bravo George, quite the man you've come to be," My sarcasm seeped through each pore on my body.

"I didn't come here to argue or fight, I need a favor and either you're going to help me or not. I don't have time to sit here and bicker, my daughter is in danger," My finger twitched was the telltale sign that I was intrigued. There was a pause between us and George took it as my answer and began towards the door.

(Present) Joseph's PoV

I regret helping George because of all the pain it caused and the rift that grew between us, but I would go back and help him again if I had to. Although it was the beginning of his demise, I felt that he didn't regret coming to me either. Some days, I feel that it is my fault that he was murdered, that he was murdered by his own family. That was what it had to come to though; I should have been brave enough to do it myself. It was my problem, he was my friend and I was such a coward that I could end his life myself. Instead, I'd sent my son, Ricky. I never wanted to open him up to this lifestyle, but the selfish part of me wanted him to be involved.

The look on Ricky's face when he pulled the trigger was menacing. It haunted me every night, sometimes it would wake me up. He had looked so comfortable and relaxed. This kept me up along with the haunting of George Jurgens. His eyes held a message, a lesson in life. His last plea never failed to enter my thoughts; they were a dominant part of my memory of him. He said it when I was turning away from him; he was on his last breath. He'd asked me to protect his family, but I couldn't, I wouldn't because I feel so guilty.

Amy's PoV

I knew that he'd been avoiding me, but I didn't know that it would bother me so much. Talking to him at school today had been easier than I thought. He knew all my secrets, well most of them. I didn't know what to expect, I didn't know if he'd told the whole school or maybe a counselor. It was hard for me to pay attention to Jesse because I kept thinking of reasons why Ricky wouldn't say anything.

"So Amy, you have to tell me about Texas," My annoyance was building because I wasn't in the mood to talk. The only reason that I was with Jesse tonight was because I owed him a date. Poor guy, he was doing the best to keep my attention, but it was just the way I was.

"It's big and hot and a pleasant place to live. I really didn't want to leave actually, but, no choice you know," I shrugged my shoulders and sipped some of my shake from my straw. Jesse looked displeased with my answer, but he didn't say anything. I smiled at him to reassure him that I was enjoying our date, which I probably would have really enjoyed it if my mind wasn't wrapped around everything else.

"So, who was that guy you left school with today?" I knew something was bothering him. Of course it was that, but I don't know why it would bother him, he wasn't my boyfriend.

"Nobody," There was a little force to my speech and I pushed back the feeling of madness. One thing I didn't like was the accusations written all over his face.

"He had to be somebody. Why would you go somewhere with a total stranger?" They guy hadn't been a total stranger; he wanted to skip out on school just like I did. I didn't even remember his name, Luke? Carson? I don't know, but we did have fun. He was in my chemistry class.

"Well, I'm with a stranger now aren't I? I don't know anything about you Jesse, you could be a murderer, or a rapist," He tensed at my words, but I didn't pay attention to him. Looking at him, I grinned. "Jeez, get a grip, I was only joking," Slightly joking. Jesse relaxed and smiled at me, his hand found mine and tore my gaze away from him and looked at the table. I wasn't ready for this again.

"Amy, I haven't known you that long, but I really like you," Jesse spoke, no hesitation in his tone, shit.

"Jesse don't," Slowly, I pulled my hand from under his and put it on my lap. He looked disappointed. Way to hurt the guys feeling Amy. I wasn't trying to hurt him, he just didn't understand. He doesn't know how I am, who I am. All he sees is some sweet innocent girl that walks around the school without a care of the world on her shoulders. He doesn't know that I'm rotten inside and I didn't want to put him through getting to know the real me. Jesse would just wound up more hurt than he is now. He wasn't strong enough to handle the real me, no one was.

Ashley's PoV

Once again here I was the blade to my skin. While Amy was out enjoying her life, I was grieving over it, criticizing myself for not being able to be like her. Everyone's life was going great except for mine. Sitting in the tub, I looked at all the marks on my skin, each one representing a different emotion. A tear fell from my eye as I remember the first time I had cut myself. It hadn't hurt as much as my life did. The release of blood that flowed down my arm represented the resentment I had for myself. From that day on, I made new excuses for why I did it; I was trying to convince myself. Today I did because I felt guilty for what I did today. Adrian had made me go talk to Ricky; she wanted me to get information out of him. She was only securing her insecurities.

I didn't understand why she felt something was going on between Ricky and Amy, there obviously wasn't anything. Adrian was on the verge just like I was; we were nearly the same person. She doesn't cope like I do though. I need to find out how she does it, cope that is, because sooner or later someone would notice my scars and force me to get help, but help wasn't what I wanted.

Please Review! OAN: Sorry if there is bad grammar in the story…