I don't own LOTR, or the Vogon.
Dear Ada,
Don't worry about that silly prophecy, I've had hundreds of the things and they've never come true. Well, except for the one that said I would travel to Rivendell, bringing grave news.
Right now we are camped outside an old dwarf mine while Gandalf tries to remember the password. Of course, it doesn't help that the doors are practically invisible. I don't know why Gimli is so proud of that.
Oops, have to go, a scary tentacled monster just rose mysteriously out of the depths.
Your loving son,
Legolas
p.s. What on arda is a Vogon?
Dear Elrond,
Tag, you're it. I'm sending you the Vogon.
Cordially,
Celeborn of Lothlorien
Dear Celeborn,
I hate you.
Elrond, Lord of Rivendell
Dear Aragorn,
Thank you for returning Lindir's hairbrush. He was very happy to have it back. Speaking of hair, you left your shampoo in Rivendell - do you want me to try and mail it to you?
Be careful in Moria, they say a great evil slumbers there.
Cordially,
Elrond, Lord of Rivendell
Dear Legolas,
That wasn't a prophecy, it was my written instructions for your last trip to Rivendell. Do be careful with the scary tentacled monster - do you remember what happened the last time you went after one of those things?
A Vogon is a vile creature that recites terrible poetry.
Your loving father,
Thranduil