so I finished writing this one roughly 24 hours ago. I don't know

I have my first exam tomorrow, one on wednesday, and one on thursday so i'm (panicking a lot) getting ahead on these

unless I die, you're getting updates!

ASK DEAN

The Lawrence Times' newest writer, Dean Winchester, has taken on the advice column. Here's a short introduction from him, followed by his first answer to a question!

Hey, guys. You've already seen this, but my name's Dean Winchester. I'm an aquarius; I enjoy sunsets, long walks on the beach and frisky women. I'm also in a pretty committed relationship with a man, so maybe you shouldn't take any of that to heart.

I love working on cars, and one of my biggest achievements to date is building up a 1967 Chevy Impala from a wreckage my uncle rescued her from. Throughout my schooling career, I was most told off for starting fights. My friends tell me the trait I should be most proud of is how good I am at helping them with their problems. Which, I guess, is why I've got this job. I'm gonna make your problems my problems until they're not problems any more.

Here we go.

Dear Dean,

I know this is the sort of question that usually gets asked in teen magazines, but their advice is always cliché and it's never worked for me. There's also that you're a guy, so I'm figuring you may be able to answer better.

I've been in love with a guy for a few years now. He's like my best friend. Problem is, I'm shy, and I don't want to ruin our friendship by telling him I'm in love with him and taking the chance that he won't like me back.

So I'm asking two things: firstly, how do I figure out if he loves me too? And secondly, how do I get him to if he doesn't?

Thanks! - Not A Teen Magazine

Hey, thanks for asking me!

Okay, I've never been a huge expert in this field, but I'll tell you one thing – most guys experience at least some attraction to anyone of their preferred gender. This means they'll look for any signs of interest, same as any the stereotypes of teen girls do.

Yeah, my first point is that the stereotypes are not real.

Most of what you do depends on who he is as a person. I can say this, though: he'll either believe everyone is in love with him, or he'll believe no one is in love with him. Either way, you'll need to be pretty overt about your interest to make him clear on it.

There's no two ways about it; if you admit your love to him and he doesn't reciprocate, it'll be weird. At the same time, 'subtle' isn't a thing that ever seems to work – with girls or guys.

You can try, though. Do some slightly out-of-character flirting just to gauge his reaction. If he flirts back even a little, you can be sure of at least some attraction there. You know the paranoia you'd feel around anyone you suspect likes you in a way you don't? Guys get that, too, so if they flirt back they don't have that paranoia, so they wouldn't mind if you like them…

If he doesn't like you, there's nothing you can do to make him like you without changing yourself. Don't ever change. He's not worth it. You'll find someone who's better for you. This I can guarantee from personal experience.

Hope I could help! – Dean.

###

You seem pretty well-versed in the woes of unrequited love. – C

what can i say, my crush was pretty much a dumbass for like 6 yrs – d

I can't imagine why you didn't include advice such as 'gaze longingly at him for 6 years, then get heavily intoxicated and kiss him before crying about unrequited love. Then you realise that he's been staring longingly back at you for at least 5 years and collect your 'dumbass' award from our offices, we've kept them around for people like you' – C

i cant believe ur still bitter – d

u could have just made a move urself – d

What? I thought you were the masculine one in this relationship? – C

Of course, I would be happy to claim the title if you don't want it… – C

u have no grasp of flirting & u had less then. how the fuck was i supposed to know? – d

I believe you just gave advice to 'Not-A-Teen-Magazine' fairly eloquently. – C

u wouldnt have flirted back. no. grasp. of. flirting. do u hear me yet? – d

No. We're texting. – C

i hate u – d

I love you, too. - C

okay, i'm experimenting with 'easier' styles of writing. let me know what you think?

and to any guests who review/have reviewed: i love you loads and it saddens me i can't reply to you3