"What do you need?"
"I dunno, you're the expert."
"I am not an expert on babies' needs! You are the one who practically raised their younger sibling."
"Yeah, but never when he was a baby. I was a toddler then, there was only so much I could understand."
"I was the youngest sibling, Dean, you have a better idea than I do. Need I remind you that you are the one who is supposed to be doing this shopping?"
"You agreed to do it! Jess is practically your sister, too."
"I'm not the one she called…"
"You're the responsible one, though; you know when we babysit Garth and Jo you refuse to even let me near…"
"Yes, so surely equal division of labour means you should be doing the shopping?"
"I'd like to think of it more that you take on the labour you choose, and we divide the rest equally. This is part of the rest."
"And what parts have you taken?"
"Test tasting."
"You'll regret that choice."
"Nah."
"Dean."
"Cas."
"You're the one with internet access."
"Ah… that's a good point."
"I can walk you through search engine use, if you like."
"I think I can handle it."
"I wouldn't want you to get confused. And hurry up; people are starting to think I'm a paedophile."
"I still don't understand why you wear that coat."
"I don't understand why you wear your father's clothes more than your own."
"I thought you said I wore other people's clothes because of my fe- I'm not going to finish that sentence."
"Actually, I said you liked other people in your clothes, but we'll count that as a Freudian slip."
"I hate you."
"Freud always believed that children had repressed sexual desires for their opposite sex parent. I suppose you'd count as a girl, though."
"Do you want to know what you buy or do you want me to hang up?"
"Would you rather tell me or just have me buy one of everything and waste your pay check?"
"You're really on a roll today."
"I'm having a good day."
"After hearing Sammy and Jess would rather dump a new born baby on us than cancel their holiday?"
"They did not know they would be having a baby shortly before departing when booking, and it was never going to be a family friendly holiday."
"Yeah, but a baby? Plus, there are ways of preventing babies from happening."
"The only fully effective method of preventing pregnancy occurring from intercourse is homosexual sex."
"I'm not so sure, we're getting a baby. Did you cheat on me?"
"Tell me what I need to get."
"All the sites seem to say something different. Can't we just steal the stuff off Sam and Jess before they leave? Hey, and why are we buying this stuff 7 months before we need it?"
"I'm sure we have the money now, we may not closer to the time. Jess said there was some things they couldn't give us, weren't you listening?"
"What couldn't they give us?"
"… weren't you listening?"
"No, so tell me… unless you weren't listening, either?"
"Stop with the smug silence."
"You've been smug this whole conversation, it's time for me to get my own back!"
"I give up. I'm coming home."
"We'll call Jess later, see if we actually need to get anything other than food. Which we can't buy 7 months in advance."
"Shut up."