I woke up the next day having not even washed the makeup from my face. But what my tears didn't get, my facial wash did. I just pulled over this pretty sweater, some skinny jeans that didn't fit me any more and some old, scruffed up boots. Then I realized that it was a Saturday. Thank God.

I instantly pulled out my French textbook and began studying. After about an hour I got a text from Emily saying that she had talked to Toby about what happened, and that he still argued that we should tell my parents, but she calmed that idea and told him that we should wait. She also mentioned that he wanted to come over and see me, so I texted him, saying that he should come over sometime today, or tomorrow evening, because I busy in the morning.

I realized that we had never exactly come to a consensus on who wanted to watch me eat, or try to eat, breakfast. So I didn't have any. Who cares? It's just breakfast. Besides, I was on a roll, I hadn't eaten anything yesterday either, and the day before that I only had some lunch.

Hanna came over just after noon. She opened the door to my room to find me organizing my clothes. "Hey Spence, you ready to whip up somethin' scrumptious?" Dear God, she even had this big stupid smile on her face. "Sureeeeee." I said, not taking my attention off of my sock drawer. "Oh, common! We can make pretty much anything. What do ya want? " She sat on my bed and tugged on my sweater. I stopped what I was doing. I had a small moment of... I don't know... disbelief? And then I felt a little bad, because I did something kind of mean. I slowly turned around, giving Hanna this look that asked her if she seriously just said that. And I laughed.

"Hanna, dear Hanna. Is that like, a trick question?" I said skeptically, still giggling. "No, Spencer. Seriously, tell me what you want to eat." She looked a little but more serious now. Don't you get it? "Nothing!" I looked at her, almost wanting her to feel bad. "...Hanna..." I scoffed "nothing!"

"Spencer, this is serious." "I know. I am being serious!" Now she looked a little frustrated. "You weigh even less than you used to. I am perfectly capable of forcing you to eat anything I deem eatable, which is unlikely to be that tiny sandwich you make yourself, or some stupid organic salad." This got my attention. I turned to her. "You wouldn't."

"I would." I paused again, contemplating my next move. She tried to pressure me. "Chose something, you have to eat Spencer." Another pause. "Can I make it?" Hanna smiled, thinking I had capitulated. "As long as you make enough for both of us."

Half an hour later we were sitting outside my house with two turkey sandwiches on our plates. "Good work Spence, I knew you could do it." I fake smiled back at her. I love Hanna, but she can be dumb sometimes. Her cell phone blinged. It was Caleb. I don't think he could have chosen a better time to text her. She looked away and I tore off a piece of my sandwich, throwing it over my fence and to the birds. She felt my motion and looked up, so I immediately pretended to be chewing. She smiled. I gave her another commercial-star grin. I was able to get away with this only three more times before her phone died, and that was no longer a possible use for distraction. I had already gotten cold and curled myself up into a small package on the porch chair.

"Are you shivering?" "It's freezing!" Hanna made a face like omigod-I-can't-believe-you-can't-just-maintain-your-own-body-heat and threw me her coat, which strangely, she didn't seem to miss. Hanna finished her meal pretty quickly, and sat there for a while, staring at the quarter of my sandwich, crumbling on my plate.

"Why aren't you chewing?"

I sighed. "I'm full Hannnn" I whined and game her a pitiful look. "You didn't eat anything." "Yes I did!" "A quarter of a sandwich doesn't count, that's practically nothing!"

"Nothing?" I looked at her in amazement and disbelief.

She looked at me in pity. "Spencer... eat."

I stared at her, not knowing where to begin. But, would it matter? I looked at that crumpled, ripped piece of meal before me. I tore off a piece and fought the instinct to throw it as hard and far as I could. I stuffed it into my mouth and chewed. Hanna had the grin of a Cheshire cat.

"See Spence! It's not that hard!" She hugged me as I finished off the last bite of the sandwich.

I nodded in false agreement as she stroked my thin hair and said "I'm proud of you."

I knew there couldn't be a good way for me to respond to that, so I just hugged her back.

"Okay, I'm going over to Caleb's. Good job. I'll see you tomorrow too! Kay?"

"Thanks Han, have fun." She walked towards her car, and I waved. I couldn't help but to be hyper aware of the guilt in my stomach. Literally. It was like something I couldn't control had taken over my body and ran to the bathroom. Soon, the guilt was emptied. I felt the thrill and disgust wave over me. As I stepped out of the bathroom, I felt my weight swaying. My eyesight was blurry, I found the edge of the living room couch and my legs gave up on me. There was only a short moment before I slept. If it was eternal, I didn't mind.

I woke up in a bed in the emergency room. Wires and IV s flowing out of my forearm. When my eyelids fluttered open and my eyes were finally able to focus, I asked if anyone was there. Toby was instantly by my side. Lying next to me on the bed, he hugged me. "What happened?"

"Spencer. I found you." He stared into my eyes, his own were watery. "I found you passed out on your couch and I got you here as quickly as I could. God, you scared me. And I thought you were getting better!"

"I am getting better!" I turned so I could hold his hands. I gripped them and pulled them closer as if it would make my story any more convincing.

"No. You're not. It's obvious to me now that you won't until we tell your parents."

"Toby, no! You can't, I'll eat more, I'll do whatever you want! They'll try to keep me in here!"

"No." He held me close as I cried into his shirt sleeve. "I'm only doing this because I care about you."

"Don't!" He pulled away from me. "I'm going to call your parents."

"Toby wait!" He pulled out his phone and took one last look at me. The words just came up, unfiltered. "I hate you."

With that, he turned back to look at me, and with a shaky voice and tears on his cheek said "Hello... Mrs. Hastings? It's Toby."

I wouldn't speak to him after that. Wouldn't look at him, and no matter what he said or how hard he cried I turned away from him. I had heard my mothers angry voice on the other end of the line as he told her everything he knew. About how I had changed my eating habits and it had, to quote him "contorted all of my thoughts". After a while he just walked out and I was left to cry into the hospital pillow. He didn't understand at all. I hoped that he hadn't told my mother too much, so that maybe I could still convince her that he was just lying because of some argument we had had.

About ten minutes later Aria came in. She tossed her purse onto a chair and ran over to me. "Spencer what happened? Why are you here?" I looked up at her, with tears in my eyes and wiped them away with my sleeve. "Aria, will you help me?" She gazed into my eyes, trusting. Something in them reassured me that what I was about to say wouldn't shake her. "Did you drive yourself here?" She nodded. "I need you to take me somewhere."

It all happened in a flash. I told Aria to grab her bag and take some pillows off of the chairs in my room. As I got out of the bed, I instructed her in taking the pillows and creating the shape of my body under the blankets. When I stood back to look at our work I told her we needed more pillows, that it wasn't nearly big enough to be my body. Then she turned to me and said "Spencer, I can assure you that that pile of pillows is MUCH bigger than you ever were." I rolled my eyes and went through a mental check list.

Before we left, I pulled each IV and needle from my arm, letting the pressue of the pressing time override any pain that I felt with each pull. Based off the maps on the walls of the hospital,, we were able to find a back exit to the parking garage. Still in my gown, we ran to her car and got in.

"Now what?" She asked me. I turned to her with crazy notions streaming through my brain and replied: "Let's have an adventure. Let's leave for the rest of the weekend and not come back and not tell anybody where we are." Aria looked back at me, astonished. "Spencer, there's something wrong with you. I-" "Don't you get it! There's nothing wrong with me. They're trying to create some illness that I don't have. Aria, they're wrong." She looked back at me, trusting again. As if she had surrendered. I turned to her. "Let's run away." She closed her eyes and with a deep breath, her back shook for a minute. "Common. Team Sparia. Just like we used to." She opened her eyes and smiled at me, just for a minute, as if all of this had never happened. As if I wasn't wearing a hospital gown. "Let's run away, and who cares if we come back."

Author's Note: I know it's been forever, but I intend to finish this story. I know exactly what to do with the next chapter, and once I find the time, it won't take me long to finish writing. I hope you all had a Happy (low calorie) Valentines Day! :) Please, please, please read and review!