November 13, 2008

Dear Mom,

Everything seems kind of... wrong right now. I feel like I should be doing better, but I'm not.

I don't know if this therapist thing is working out. I've talked to her twice now, and I still don't feel like it's helping. Maybe I'm just expecting results way too soon.

I haven't talked to Selena or Nick at all this week. I guess they're both busy with their new school and stuff.

On the up side of all this, I've been spending a boatload more time with Joe. I'm not expecting any more Disney World trips, but it's nice just being with him anyway.

It's pretty pathetic to say it, but the only best friend I have in school anymore is my teacher. Mr. Carrison does everything for me. He lets me stay in the room with him during lunch. And we just talk.

Today is Friday, so I don't have school tomorrow. Joe invited me to dinner with his family. I think Nick and Selena will be there, so maybe I'll get to see them.

I'm a little nervous, because I've never actually met Joe's whole family before. I've met his mom. I've met Nick. I haven't formally met his other brothers or his dad. I just hope they like me. I'm likable, right?

I'll let you know how dinner goes. I love you.

Love always,

Demi.

I stuff the letter into my very full lockbox and fight to close it up. I really need to get a bigger lockbox.

I get up from my chair, grab Jorge off my bed and head downstairs. Aunt Kathy isn't home, which only leaves me and Uncle Jason in the house.

I go into the living room and sit down on the couch next to him. He's busy playing some kind of football game on his playstation. Joe has this game too.

"What's up, punk?" He doesn't take his eyes off the TV screen.

I decide to watch him, because I have nothing else better to do. "Nothing..." I cross my legs on the couch.

"What time are you going with your boyfriend?"

"Whenever he calls me. He didn't give me a specific time."

"You're just going to dinner, right?"

"As far as I know, yeah. That's all he's told me."

"Alrighty. Shouldn't you go get dressed or something?" He pauses his game and takes a sip of beer.

"I guess..." I sigh. I stare at the beer can. It's grey with white mountains. Coors Light, I think.

"...You want a sip?" He offers me.

"...No. I don't drink... Anymore." I refuse and shake my head.

"It's beer, punk. It's not gonna get you drunk." He hands me the can.

I sip it. I don't like the taste of beer. It tastes terrible.

"Don't tell your aunt I let you drink. She's been all... You know lately." He takes the can back off me.

"Overprotective?" I guess the word he was looking for.

"In a way, yeah... She's been overprotective."

I chuckle, though nothing is truly funny. "I'm gonna go get dressed."

"Alright..."

I stand up from the couch and head back upstairs. It's the first time I've ever formally met Joe's whole family, so I want to look nice and make a good impression.

I don't need to shower, because I showered as soon as I came home from school.

I look in my closet for something decent to wear. I'm not sure if I should overdress or underdress. I grab a plain black pencil skirt from my closet and a long-sleeved brown shirt. I don't really think it's overdressed or underdressed. I think it's classy.

I slide on the pencil skirt and look at myself in my body mirror. The outline of my underwear is extremely prominent.

I lift the skirt up and take my underwear off. I go to my drawer and find a thong and slide it on.

Suddenly, on my dresser, my phone rings. It's probably Joe.

I lay shirtless across my bed and answer my phone. "Hello?"

"Are you ready, babe?"

"Yeah. I'm ready. Where are we going?"

"I don't know. My dad likes this real expensive place in Port Orange, so we'll probably go there."

"Okay... How long until you're here?"

"About... Ten minutes. We'll be over to get you."

"Okay. See you."

"Love you baby."

"Love you too... Bye."

We both hang up and I continue to get dressed. My newly black hair falls straight to my boobs when it's straight. I think straight is my best look, so I keep it straight.

I put on a pair of mini heels and grab my phone and a stick of gum. I think I look more like I'm going to a job interview than to dinner with my boyfriend's family.

I go back downstairs with my uncle until Joe's family gets here.

"Why do you look so nice, punk? You look pretty."

"Thanks..." I chomp on my gum. "I've never really met his family before, so I'm trying to... You know... Impress them."

"You're gorgeous, punk. And your hair is getting long."

"I just got it cut..."

"Really? Must've grew out again or something..." He reaches in his pocket and grabs his wallet. "Here. Take some money. You never know what might happen." He hands me a crisp $50 bill.

"Thanks..." I take it and shove it in the left cup of my bra.

"Wow, Demi. That's an old people move. Old people do that shit."

I laugh. "What? Put money in their bra?"

"Yeah. Take your purse or something. Don't stick the money in your bra. Old women do that."

"...I should probably take my purse anyway. I might need aspirin... Or something."

"Are you on your monthly?"

"No! No... No... Nope." I shake my head. "No." It's so insanely easy to talk to my uncle about these things.

"I'm just askin, kid. I'm just askin." He throws up his hands like he's innocent.

"You're so weird." I shake my head.

"Hey, kid. I live in a house with sensitive females. I have the right to be a little weird."

Outside, I hear a horn honk.

"That's my ride. Gotta go..." I spring up off the couch and grab my purse off the end table in the hallway. "Bye Uncle Jay. Tell Aunt Kath I said hi when she gets home."

"Alright, punk. I'll see you. Have fun."

I sling my purse up on my shoulder and shut the front door behind me. Instead of Joe's usual little truck he usually drives, outside to pick me up is a large white Durango truck in the driveway.

Mindful of my skirt, I walk like a lady to the car. Joe's dad, I assume is in the driver's seat. His mom is in the passenger's seat. From what I can see through the tinted windows, the backseat is completely full.

I open up a door to the backseat and step carefully into the car. Ultimately, I'm sitting beside Joe.

"Hey babe." He smiles at me like I'm the center of his universe.

"Hey..." I look down, blushing.

"Joseph, introduce her to everyone." Joe's mom says from the front seat. Her voice is very soft and very pretty. It matches the way she looks.

"Demi, this is my mom, Denise. My dad, Paul. My brother, Kevin... You know Nick. You know Selena..."

I look back. In the back of us, there are two more rows of seats. I didn't even see Nick and Selena sitting in the back.

"This is Kevin's girlfriend, Danielle, and my other brother, Frankie." Joe finishes introducing me to everyone.

"Hi... I'm Demi. Nice to meet you guys..." I say as politely as possible in my special voice. You know that fake voice that everyone puts on for show whenever they're trying to sound like a polite and civilized person? That's my special voice.

"Very nice to meet you too, Hun." Joe's dad says to me, looking back to back out of the driveway.

I'm surprised I'm not more nervous than what I am.

"We're going to Milano's. You ever been there?" Joe reaches down and holds my hand.

"No..." I turn around and look at Selena.

Selena looks at me like she's going to cry. She gives me a very wide smile. "Honey, you look so pretty! Look at your hair... I didn't even know you dyed it! Demi... I feel like I haven't seen you in forever!" She leans up and hugs me awkwardly, to the best of her ability.

"I know! I miss you too... Oh my gosh... Look at your stomach!" I put my hand down on her belly. Her belly is getting pretty out there.

"I know... I'm huge. I'm so fat..."

"And none of it's going to your ass." Joe comments sarcastically.

"Watch your mouth, Joseph." His mom scolds him which makes me chuckle.

"Don't worry about him, babe. He's just mad that you look better than Demi." Nick whispers quite loud to her.

"Please. Demi looks like a beauty queen next to Selena." Joe retorts which makes me blush again.

"Both of y'all should just shut it. Danielle's the prettiest, end of story. Drop it." Kevin speaks up, joining in the playful conversation.

I have to say that I agree. Kevin's girlfriend is gorgeous.

"Frankie, who's the prettiest girl here?" Joe asks the little one.

The little one looks up from his Nintendo DS. "Mommy."

Both of Joe's parents die laughing in the front seat.

"Aside from mommy, Frankie!"

Frankie just shrugs. I'm already having a ton of fun with Joe's family.

I look out the window and the sign says that we're already in Port Orange.

"That didn't take long..." I whisper to Joe.

"It only takes fifteen minutes to get from Daytona to Port Orange." He rubs my fingers. "Did I tell you how sexy your legs are in skirts?"

"No, I don't think you did." I rest my head on his shoulder.

"I didn't? Well I'm telling you now." He starts rubbing my leg. My skirt is a little bit tight, being that it's a pencil skirt, but he manages to slip his hand up it. He rubs my thigh. "You just shave?"

"Mhm. Last night..." I nod. I keep my legs crossed like a lady.

"I love your legs, babe..." He whispers in my ear and kisses my cheek. He rubs the upper part of my thigh, right where my butt is.

"Do you?"

"Mhm." He kisses my cheek again. "Are you not wearing underwear?" He's rubbing my butt now.

"I'm wearing a thong..."

"Damn..." He kisses my lips as we pull into the parking lot of a big, pretty looking building. "I got you when we're done here. You're mine..."

"Sounds like fun..."

"It will be. Trust me." He opens up the door when we park and lets me out.

I step out and stretch. I notice Joe looking at my legs. "Keep your tongue in your mouth." I tease him.

He shakes his head. "I dunno if I can wait til later."

"Well you're gonna have to."

"Nah, I don't think so." He holds my hand and kisses my head.

"What do you mean?"

"You'll see."

I chuckle and turn around. Selena steps out the car too. She's wearing a pretty light purple sundress. She looks pretty.

"How's school without me?" She asks.

"It's horrible." I let go of Joe's hand and drift behind to talk to her. "I'm so lonely!"

"I'm gonna come back to public school after Luna's born. My mom already said I could." She grabs a strand of my hair and plays with it like she always used to. I'm thinking about the time we kissed. I don't miss it, but it's still crazy to think about.

"Do you have stuff for her yet?" We all begin to walk inside the restaurant.

"My mom bought a couple clothes and stuff, but nothing real serious just yet. You wanna come over and help me set up her room and stuff?"

"Yeah, sure." We approach the door to the fancy restaurant. It looks expensive.

"I think I want to make her room purple instead of pink."

We walk in the restaurant behind Joe and Nick's entire family. The restaurant is very big and it's dim lit. The only lights are coming from blur lights hanging from the ceiling. And I swear to god, there is a river flowing through the restaurant. I think it's Italian themed.

"Buonesera! Welcome to Milano's." A dark haired, tan skinned lady greets us. I think she's speaking Italian.

"Buona serata anche a te, ma'am." Joe's dad speaks Italian back. I'm a little confused, but okay.

"Reservations under Jonas."

"Certainly, follow me." The woman's accent is very thick. She starts walking through a long hallway.

I follow everyone in a single file line, because the hallway is just that narrow. This is very nice, but scary at the same time.

Joe holds me around my waist as I walk. I guess he can tell that I'm a little uneasy about this.

When we get out of the brick-wall hallway, we exit into what looks like a loading dock. We're getting on a boat?

There is an Italian man standing inside a very narrow boat that's floating inside the river. We all load into the boats, four people per boat.

Oh, I get it. I think we're supposed to be in Venice. You know how they travel around in boats in Venice? I think this is what it's supposed to be.

Joe sits next to me in the boat as the Italian man rows our boat. Selena and Nick and Kevin and Danielle are in the boat behind us.

"Fancy, huh?" Joe holds my hand.

"Yeah... Real fancy..." I look around.

"We only come here like once a year. It's pretty expensive here."

"I can see that..."

We get to our destination. There are a bunch of tables in the dining area. This is really nice.

Joe helps me climb out of the boat. We all wait on the next loading dock for everyone to be together. When Nick and Selena's boat clears out, we all walk over to a long table.

Like a gentleman, Joe holds out the chair for me to sit down. He sits next to me, and Selena sits beside me and Nick beside her. Kevin sits across from me, Danielle across from Joe and so on.

"Can I get you all something to drink?" The waitress asks us. She doesn't seem like she's Italian at all.

"I'll have a Pepsi." Joe says, flipping through the menu.

"I'll have a Pepsi too." I say. I look through the menu too. Everything on here is Italian. Pastas and pizza and salads all topped with Italian dressing. I guess you're fucked if you don't like Italian food.

"I'll be right back with drinks." The waitress closes her notepad and puts two baskets of Italian bread on the table. She walks away.

Joe's mom grabs a mini plate from the pile on the table and puts a slice of bread on her plate. "It's nice to finally meet you, Demi. We've had dinner with Selena and Danielle countless times... It's nice to have dinner with you."

I take a slice of bread too. "It's nice to meet you guys too." I smile nicely.

"As you can see, we're a big Italian family..."

"Yeah. It's... Nice to see how connected to your roots you guys are..."

"Big Italian family, but we brought the Mexican with us. Maybe we should stop at Taco Bell for her." Joe's father cracks a joke. I laugh slightly. That was funny.

"Shut up, Paul." Selena sticks her tongue out at him.

Joe's dad laughs a little more. "So... Are you Italian, Demi?"

"Sicilian." I nod. I take a bite of bread.

"You look it. I can tell by those beauty marks and those hairy little arms. Are you full?" Denise asks me. She seems fascinated with me.

"No... Only like... 75% or something..." I don't really know the exact percentage I am. I know that I'm pretty Italian, because I can remember my mom's grandparents speaking fluent Italian to me at family reunions. I know that I'm not full Italian, because I also remember my real dad's parents teaching me how to do some Mexican dance or whatever.

"Really? You look full. What else are you? German... Grecian?"

"...Mexican. Latina..." I say with a smirk.

"Make that DOUBLE the Taco Bell!" Joe's dad cracks up.

"You're Latina?" Joe seems surprised. He looks at me.

"Mhm..."

"Explains that ass..." He mumbles and keeps flipping through the menu.

"You're a pretty little thing. I think I've told you that before." Denise keeps looking at me. I'm blushing.

"Thank you."

"Are you guys ready to order?" The waitress comes back with all our drinks.

"Yeah, I'll have the uh... Gnocchi. With the garden salad and dinner rolls. Alfredo on the side." Joe orders his food.

I clear my throat. "I want the um... The cheese and beef ravioli with the meat stuffed shells, please. Salad for a side..."

I feel Joe's eyes boring into my legs. He's still looking at me like I'm a piece of meat.

"I like your outfit, Demi." Kevin's girlfriend says to me. Her smile is flawless too.

"Thanks... I like your top..." I compliment her back.

Joe's hands wonder to my legs again. He's rubbing me again. I just let him go.

"When's thanksgiving break start for you?" Selena asks me.

"Next Friday..."

Joe moves his hand to between my legs. I lock my legs around his hand, which isn't a bright idea.

"You want to stay over sometime during break? My mom's been askin about you..."

"Sure... I miss your mom too." I chuckle.

Joe's face is straight. He's looking over like he's listening to what me and Selena are talking about, but I know he's not. He uses his entire hand to pry my legs apart. He's strong.

"She was all like... "How's Demi? Invite Demi over." Selena mocks her mom.

I laugh again. "Yeah? I'll be over to see your sexy ass step dad." I joke with her.

Joe moves my underwear to the side and starts sliding two fingers along the outside of me.

"Who, Brian? Ew!"

I close my eyes briefly to cope with what Joe's doing to me. "He's hot..."

"No he IS not..."

Joe licks his lips and a slick little smirk wipes across his face. My legs are open as far as my tight skirt could possibly allow. Nobody can tell under the table though. To them, it probably looks like Joe's listening to me and Joe's conversation with his hand on my leg. He uses his two fingers to part me open. He slides in with only his index finger.

"B..Brian? He's totally hot..." I start to squirm a bit, but I keep control.

Selena looks over skeptically. A smile wipes across her face. She knows. She's gonna be a bitch about this. "Really? Tell me why you think he's hot..."

"Yeah, Demi. Tell her why you think he's hot." Joe says slyly. He has a smirk all over his face. He's moving his finger like he's tickling the inside of me. Oh my god.

I bite the inside of my cheek. "H..he's hot... I... Because he's... Hot..." I close my legs around Joe's finger again and squirm.

"Really, Demi? Is it his eyes? Is it his face?" Nick starts taunting me too. He knows what Joe's doing to me too.

The other side of the table has no idea. They're talking amongst themselves.

"I... I..." I babble.

"This Pepsi is so good, Nick. It's nice and wet..." Selena emphasizes the word "wet." "Demi, you have Pepsi, right? Tell me how wet it is... It's just right to quench your thirst, huh?"

Joe smiles a little more and used his thumb to tease me on the outside while he's wiggling his finger wildly on the inside. Oh god...

"I... I..." I babble some more. I'm gonna cum all over this chair in a minute. "I have to use the restroom!" I announce to everyone at the table. And that's it.

Joe takes his hand from between my legs casually.

"Joe, why don't you show her where the ladies room is..." Joe's mom says quickly and gets back to her and Danielle's conversation.

"Certainly. Let's go to the bathroom, babe." Joel's laughing. I'm gonna kill him.

"Hurry back." Nick teases us. Selena waves like a little bitch.

I look down at Joe's hand before we get up. His index finger is shiny from being wet and his thumb is just a little wet too. I'm gonna murder him.

I get up from the table, and Joe follows me, steering me to the bathroom. Like a little idiot, he sucks on his index finger. He's good at acting innocent.

"The bathrooms are right here..." Along a long wall, there are individual doors. Each door is a separate stall.

I turn the knob and go into the bathroom. I'm gonna kill Joe.

Instead of walking into the men's room like I thought he was gonna, he follows me into the tiny little bathroom. He shuts the door. "You alright?" He smirks.

"I hate you." I run the water at the faucet to wash my hands and calm my body down.

He shuts the bathroom door and locks it too. "You gonna let me finish?" He kisses my neck as I stand at the sink.

"Not in the bathroom..."

"Why not? Why do you think I followed you in here?" He picks me up and pushes me against the wall.

"In the bathroom, Joe?"

"Why not?" He pulls my underwear down to my ankles. He unzips his jeans and struggles, but pulls his dick through the hole of his jeans.

"They're gonna wonder where we are..."

"I'll make it quick." He kisses my neck. He opens my legs and braces me against the wall. He reaches over nonchalantly and turns the lights off.

"How quick?" I must be really horny, because I actually drip down my leg. I'm so wet.

"Quick enough." He moves me down so that we're lined up with each other. "Lift your leg up, baby... Lift it..."

I lift it up and he slides right in. He doesn't have a condom on, and he feels so good. He's so hard.

"Uhhh... Shit..." That's the first time I've ever heard Joe say anything when he's fucking me. "Open up a little more.. Little more.. Open for me..."

I open my legs wider for him. I know he's stuffing all inside me, because the rims of his jeans are getting wet. I've never been this wet before. "Mmmmm... Mmm... Mmmmm..." I'm moaning softly. Oh my god. I can't believe I'm letting him fuck me in a bathroom. I can't believe I'm letting him fuck me raw. There's no condom. And I can't believe it's feeling his good.

"Damn, you're wet baby. You're so wet... God..." He mumbles in my ear. He pushes my legs open so far that I hear the stitches in my skirt pop. My knees are resting on the wall. I didn't know my legs opened this far. I didn't know Joe could go this deep.

"Joe... Joe... Joe... JOE..." I'm trying to tell him to remember to pull out. My mind is going wild right now. Why does this feel so good.

"Shhh... Shhh..." He kisses my lips and reaches down to play with my clit. "FUCK... You're so wet baby..." He puts his face in my neck. "You feel m...you feel my dick?"

Oh my god, this is like the best sex I've ever had. Please pull out before you cum. Please... Fuck it. I don't care. I'm on birth control. "I feel it baby... I feel it..."

"Ughhhh... Demi... Demi..." He squeezes my waist and leans over. He's leaning so that his dick is fucking me to the side.

I curl my toes and my shoes fall to the floor. I've never seen Joe like this. I've never seen him so... Animalistic.

"Get it wetter, baby. Get it wetter..." He bites my neck. He uses his entire hand to play with my clit. I don't think there's a single inch of his dick that isn't inside me.

"I'm coming... I'm coming..." I dig my nails into his back. Ohhhh god... Oh god. "Ahhhhh... Ahhhhhhh!"

Something feels weird. Something...warm. It's oozy. It's gooey. He didn't pull out. It fills me up.

He breathes heavy and finally stops pumping me. I breathe heavy too and take my claws out his back. It actually feels good. His cum feels good... I'm not gonna get pregnant... I'm not gonna get pregnant...

Joe holds me on the wall so we can both catch our breath.

That was amazing. It was better than amazing. It was fucking... Phenomenal.

"FUCK! Fuck, fuck, fuck... FUCK!" Joe knows what he did. He realizes it.

He pulls out of me so fast it's not funny. "FUCK!" He lets me down off the wall. "Go pee, Demi. Go pee. Now.. Right now. Pee. And push it all out. ALL out..."

"I don't have to pee..." I shake my head.

"WELL TRY!" He puts his hands under my leg and holds me over the toilet instead of letting me squat. "Go pee!"

"I can't!"

"TRY!"

I close my eyes and really try to pee. A little bit comes out.

"Pee, Demi. Please pee. And push it all out..." I think he's gonna cry.

"I can't..." I shake my head.

"Then push it out... You have to push it out..."

"I don't know... What you mean..." I shake my head again.

"PUSH IT OUT OF YOU!"

"I don't know how..."

"Dammit, Demi!"

"I'm on birth control!"

"Dammit! Damn, damn, DAMN! FUCK!"

"I'm sorry!"

"FUCK!"

"We have to.. We have to go back. It's been like twenty minutes..."

"Please pee, Demi..."

"I can't... I don't have to..."

"FUCK."

"I'm on birth control... We'll just... We'll see what happens... We'll see... We'll see..."

He sniffs. He turns the lights on in the bathroom. His eyes are really red. He's crying.

"Joe..." I wiggle my thong back on. "Don't cry... Please don't cry." I hold his face in my hands. "We'll just see what happens. My doctor said I have a better chance of winning the lottery than getting pregnant on birth control pills... It's okay... It was one slip up..." I wipe his tears.

"...I'm sorry, baby. I'm so sorry..."

"Don't be sorry. I'm not pregnant... I'll take a test... I'll take a couple. I'll take some... Next weekend."

"No, tomorrow. I'm taking you to the hospital tomorrow morning. You're gonna get the blood test."

"We have to go back..."

"Tomorrow, Demi."

"We have to go back..."

"Agree on it."

"Tomorrow..." I agree.

I really hope this birth control worked.

Oh my god, it better have worked.