Chapter 2

Both Beckett and Castle were tired, and the day had definitely taken its toll on them.

Kate looked at the clock, and it read 11:47. Almost midnight. Hopefully Alexis and Martha were in bed, and everyone at the precinct was wrapping up, because she dreaded the thought of too many of the people she loved being alone at this time of night.

Castle could tell she was lost in thought. "Kate" no reply "Kate. Kate." He raised his voice for the last one, not much though because everything in his body seemed to be weak.

"Sorry Castle. I was thinking."

"About anything in particular?"

"No. Just everything and anything really."

"If there's anything, you can always tell me, always."

"I just... I just feel like this is my fault. If I had of told you, and we hasn't of fought then maybe we wouldn't have been out there, and you wouldn't have gotten sh-"

"No Kate. No. None of this is on you, we didn't know it was going to happen, hell, we don't even know why it happened? But all I know is none of this is on you"

He noticed her wince slightly at her words, what would make her react like this, why would she be caught off guard at something he said.

She stayed quiet.

"Kate. What is it. I know you. What is it?"

She couldn't bring herself to say it, she couldn't go through the pain of telling him, seeing his reaction, and watching him crumble.

A tear cascaded down her pale face and fell into her golden hair.

He knew something wasn't right, and if this had taught him anything, it was that if he gave her enough time, then she would tell him.

They say in silence. Him holding her hand, caressing it, waiting for her to explain; and her, pondering over the decision.

He couldn't take the silence. He had just survived a bullet. He tried to lighten the mood.

"Hey, at least it wasn't doctor motorcycle boy doing the operation?"

Kate smiled, he always knew when to joke, to make her smile, and his personality certainly hadn't gone amiss.

But she couldn't respond, she was to traumatised, and the weight of everything was very much there again.

In the end it was too much for Kate and she just wanted to let it back. This experience had taught her not to hide information from Castle, no matter how significant it was.

She wiped the tears from her face, sat up, and took his hand.

She didn't know how to phrase it or to say it, but she would have a go.

Castle sensed her uneasiness. "Don't worry. In your own time. I believe in you."

It pained Kate to know he was true, he was usually right, but this time, it felt different.

"Castle. We think we know who the shooter might be."

He glanced up at her, slightly shocked, but she remained looking down at the tiled floor beneath his hospital bed.

"At the time, I thought I recognised the man, but dismissed the thought in my head. I thought it couldn't be, but it turns out it might be."

More tears came, tumbling from the corners of her eyes, and spilling all over their clasped hands.

"Since he was a suspect, we put out an APB on him. And it has been ever since. He went off radar for this long, but people have seen him recently. Recognised him."

He didn't know who she was on about, and at this point didn't know if he wanted too.

"It pains me to say this, but your shooter is the person who pushed me off the building that day, after me. It's my killer."