Title: Life Goes On.
Author: Roque872002
Rating: K
Pairing: Sam/Jack.
Season: 3
Spoilers: Point of View.
Summary: AR. Life goes on, even though the mirror was switched off. Yup it's another one of those fics.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author's notes: I was going through my laptop - deleting things I no longer want or need - and I found this. I have no idea how long it's been on here…. I think I downloaded it from an email I sent myself when I changed laptops. Just thought I would share.
As much as I like seeing followers and favourites in my inbox, it's the reviews that I crave. They make everything worth it. Its like getting paid. Love it, hate it, have an idea or suggestion, let me know. Don't be shy!
For now this is complete. I honestly don't know if I'll ever continue it. I'm heading down to London tomorrow for LFCC. Is it time to go yet?!
Life goes on
"I can't do this," she whispered into his chest, holding on to him tightly.
"Yes you can. I'm not going anywhere Sam, I'm gonna look after you," Charlie Kawalsky told her as he tightened his arms around her.
"I miss him," she sniffed.
"I know you do. I miss him too," he soothed as he ran a hand down her hair.
"How could she not get it?" she asked, her voice full of pain. "How can we not be together in that reality?"
"I dunno Sam. It's her loss. You two were perfect together."
Kawalsky glanced around the on base quarters. He felt the walls close in around him. He sighed and rubbed his best friends wife's back. He felt angry tears prick at his eyes. His dead best friend.
"We'd been discussing a few things," the woman in his arms breathed.
"What kind of things?" Kawalsky asked softly, genuinely interested. He knew he had to keep her talking before she completely withdrew from him. He could already feel her giving in to her grief.
"Lots of things," she said. "We'd talked about having a family. He was pushing for a dog. We were going to go to the cabin. He was even suggesting names for our hypothetical children."
"Jack and his love of dogs," Kawalsky breathed a short laugh.
"We can't do any of that now."
"Sam," he said as he drew back and held her face in his hands, his eyes searching hers. "I know it's not the same, and it will never be anywhere close to what it should be, but I'm not leaving you. I'm gonna stick by you through everything. You'll need to have me surgically removed from your side. I'll take you to the cabin. It might help. We can do whatever you want. But I'm not leaving you."
Sam nodded and cast her eyes down to her lap. "Can we get a dog?" she asked, barely loud enough for him to hear.
"Yeah, we can get a dog," he laughed in response. "But not some poor excuse for a dog. We'll get one that Jack would approve of."
"Okay," she nodded, a ghost of a smile on her lips.
Life goes on
"Sam?" Kawalsky asked as he walked into her lab three weeks later.
She was hunched over her desk, her hands buried in her hair as she stared intently at the desk while taking deep breaths.
"Sam?" he asked again, worry creeping into his voice as he approached her side.
"I don't feel very well," she said as her face turned pale.
"C'mon, let's get you to the infirmary," he said as he placed a hand on her arm.
"I think I'm gonna throw up," she muttered as Charlie gently pulled her to her feet.
"Deep breaths Sam. Deep breaths," he said as he wrapped an arm around her shoulder and guided her from the room.
"I thought that tuna at lunch tasted funny," she muttered under her breath as they walked towards the elevator.
Life goes on
"You're very pale," Janet said as she looked at her friend with a worried stare.
"I don't feel very well," she said quickly before grabbing the cardboard basin to her left and throwing up into it. "That tuna was definitely off."
"I'm going to run some tests. You could have picked up a bug from somewhere. God knows you've run yourself down recently," Janet said sadly, knowing how hard her friend was finding life difficult with the death of her husband.
"Okay," she nodded as Kawalsky gathered her hair in his hands at the nape of her neck.
Life goes on
"Sam," Janet said just over an hour later, the test results in her hand.
"I don't think I have anything left in me to bring up. But I still want to throw up. Please tell me you have something you can give me."
"I'm sorry," Janet shook her head. "I can't do that."
"Food poisoning right?" she sighed. "Just need to bring it all back up."
"It's not as simple as that Sam. It's not the tuna that's making you feel ill."
"I didn't have anything else for lunch. And I missed breakfast. What else could it be?"
"Sam, honey," Janet started looking at her best friend, then the man at her side who still held her hair and the new and so far empty basin in his hands. She sighed and looked at her blonde patient. "Honey, you're pregnant. About six weeks along."
"No," tears welled up in her eyes as she shook her head.
"Sam, I ran the test myself three times. There's no mistake. Morning sickness usually starts at around six weeks."
"But he's not here! I need him to be here. I can't do this without him," she cried, then paused. "The tests are wrong. We were only discussing a family. We were careful!"
Kawalsky pulled her into his arms and held her tightly as she cried. He felt his heart break. His best friend had unknowingly fathered a child he would never meet; never hold; never laugh with; never fall in love with and never teach how to fish.
He would never see his unborn child on the ultrasound screen. He would never see his child grow, or feel them move in the womb. He would never sooth his child to sleep or pick them up when they fell. He would never see them smile. He would never see the first steps, hear the first words, wave goodbye on the first day of school.
"I can't do this," Sam whispered.
"Yes you can. I'm right here beside you, remember?"
"I can't ask you to do this Charlie," she sniffed as she pulled back and wiped her face.
"Hey," he said softly as wrapped his hands around her wrists. "What kind of best man and cool uncle would I be if I made you do this on your own, huh? Someone has to teach Little O'Neill in there how to fish properly."
Sam nodded and looked at her lap. "If its a boy I want to call him Jonathan," she said adamantly. "He'd hate that," she added in a whisper.
"Yeah," Kawalsky agreed in a laugh. "He would."
"I don't understand. We were always careful. We'd only been discussing it for a couple of weeks before the Goa'uld arrived."
"Even the most careful couples can get pregnant Sam. Maybe this baby was just meant to be," Janet smiled softly.
"But he's not here," she whispered. "He'll never meet his child," she placed a protective hand on her stomach.
"This baby will know exactly who their father is. We'll make sure of it."