Chapter 5 – That's What Friends Are For

Walking quickly, Spock passed through the chilly evening San Francisco air and into Starfleet Academy's main library, set in the middle of the campus grounds. With confidence he continued inside, between rows of multiple shelves until he reached the section he was looking for, the aisle on Surveillance and Decoding. As he waited he stared at the books, the irony not lost on him.

He heard the soft tread in the muffled confines of the building of someone approaching. Pulling the nearest book out he opened it at a random page and tilted his head downwards towards it, making it look like he was actually reading.

"You know," Nyota said gently from behind, coming to a stop, "I didn't know that you could read upside down."

Spock really looked at the book then, and sure enough the text on the double spread of pages that he was 'reading' was the wrong way round. He put the book back and turned to the woman, "Evening Nyota."

"Hello Spock," she smiled sadly up at him.

He carefully took in her appearance, her hair and uniform were as immaculate as ever but her eyes told a different story. They looked bone tired, indicating the lack of sleep he'd seen in all of the other members of the crew, either they weren't resting or when they did they were plagues with nightmares, he's assumed both were likely. Even as she smiled the corners of her mouth were turned down, and he didn't like that. Nyota had always been his friend, while she was in the academy he had to curb some of her more emotional feelings towards him, which had put a slight strain on their relationship but they had gotten past that. She'd helped him through many low points in his life, the death of his mother and the loss of his planet, the period of time when he was trying to discern his feelings for Jim. Now here she was, obviously suffering from the same agonies as he was and he wasn't sure how to make her feel better, even though he desperately wanted.

Earth customs would imply that wrapping his arms around her and holding her to his chest would be the best thing in the situation but he kept his arms behind his back, afraid that the emotional transfer may be too much for her. However she reached out and cupped the side of his face, gasping as soon as her skin made contact with his as she felt just how intense he was burning from the inside out. Nyota did not pull back though, and for that he was grateful as he felt some of his emotions bleeding from him into her. He closed his eyes, letting himself feel truly vulnerable as he leaned into her soft palm. He could feel her emotions brushing against his barriers, there were equal amounts of pain and loss but she also directed reassurance and tenderness towards him, letting him know that he was not alone, and it helped ease the weight off his shoulders that had never disappeared since that disastrous occurrence with the warp core.

After a while he opened his eyes, his lips perking into a small smile, "Thank you, Nyota," he said softly, indicating that she could remove her hand.

When she did he felt the loss of contact as the out-let his emotions were seeping down was cut off. "Do you feel better?" she asked, her voice shaking and her eyes glazed over on the verge of tears.

"I do," he nodded, "but you do not. You have taken some of the burden of my emotions, even though they are not yours to carry."

"That's what friends are for Spock, to share your pain and help you through it," she said weakly, delicately wiping her eyes. He merely nodded to her, allowing her to gain control before asking, "Why meet here?"

"Well if they're watching you, and with everything that happened to Scotty," she laughed bitterly, "the chances are they're watching the rest of us. It's very easy to get lost in a library, while also being impossible to bug one properly, especially one this size." She gestured around herself before continuing, "This aisle is one of thirteen that is not covered by the buildings security cameras as well as being one of the most unused, adding to its privacy."

"You are by far one of the most surreptitious human's I know, Nyota," Spock told her.

"I'll take that as a compliment," she laughed again, but this time not the bitter one from before but neither was it her usual care-free titter, it still contained traces of the unhappiness she was feeling. They'd all aged significantly because of recent events, and it was showing. Nyota sighed then, the corners of her mouth turning even futher down as she said, "The council have made Sulu a Captain. He refused the post but you know how they are, once they've got something into their collectively idiotic head's. Fucking bureaucracy."

Spock was shocked by her crass use of language, but also warmed by the passion she put behind it. Starfleet was corrupt, but just how corrupt they were only beginning to find out, it still didn't diminish just how alarming the situation was though. "What about the Admiralty, surely they have something to say about what Peters is enforcing."

"He's head of the council and the Admiralty," she told him.

"But that goes against regulation they're meant to act as two separate entities coming together on occasion to make final decisions. How has this happened?" he demanded.

"They're scared Spock," Nyota answered, the fight suddenly leaving her as she looked to the floor, "After what happened to the city, with Marcus, they want to cover their own backs. None of them wanted to lead the council so when Peters volunteered they all fell right into his back pocket. I was present at a meeting today, they've had me monitoring Klingon transmissions and I was delivering a report, and they didn't question him on anything." She looked up again then, staring into Spock's eyes as she mumbled, "I wanted to scream at them, but why would they listen to me, a common Lieutenant."

He didn't like the way that she was talking about herself, he saw now that the recent events had left Nyota doubt riddled, second guessing herself without the confidence Jim had instilled in all of them. "You should not speak of yourself in that way," he admonished. "They seem to have forgotten that you were one of the key members all those years ago, when we were facing the Narada. People may see Jim as the hero of that dark day but you were the one who told him about the broadcasts. Without you we'd all be dead, floating in space reduced to mere dust."

"You have such a sunny outlook on things, Spock, but nevertheless," she half smiled up at him, "Thank you."

He nodded his head to her an idea striking him, "Would you like to join me at Doctor McCoy's and Mister Scott's resident's for dinner, there is some need for celebration after all."

"I don't understand?" she frowned.

Spock let the relief and happiness show on his face, even thinking about it now bringing back the memories from the kitchen, of Mister Scott telling him his lover's whereabouts as liberation and joy had slowly spread through him. A smile slowly stretched his lips, "You mentioned earlier, however briefly, Montgomery's termination from Starfleet. It was not in vain, Nyota, we have found Jim's location."

A gasp escaped Nyota as she raised a hand to cover her mouth, her eyes wide and shining with unshed tears. "That's-" she stopped for a moment, to regain control over her voice and emotions, "That's wonderful Spock! But…if you know where he is, why aren't you already there?"

His mood darkened then, a frown furrowing his normally stoic face, "He is at a half-way house on the outskirts of Salinas, Kansas. Under normal circumstances I would have left in a heartbeat but Starfleet are monitoring me too closely. If they so much as heard a whisper that we knew where Jim can be found, they'd move him without a moment's hesitation. I just don't understand how they can cover something like that up?" Spock wondered, thinking again back to their clash with Nero. When they'd come back to Earth there pictures had been on the cover of every magazine, every newspaper, Jim had practically become the poster boy for Starfleet.

"They've black listed him," she answered dejectedly. "Every trace of him has been wiped from archives across the world. If you search for him on the internet nothing comes up, they've deleted every remnant of him."

"How do you know this?"

"They made me help them do it," she whimpered as her eyes glazed over again. Nyota looked so broken to him now, so utterly distraught that an uncontrolled rage quickly took over him. Fists clenched at his sides he closed his eyes and breathed heavily through his nose, his nostrils flaring. Not only had Starfleet taken his lover away from him but they were hurting his friends, his family, in inconceivable ways designed to break them, to force them into subordination. It sickened him. Sending Jim away, decommissioning the Enterprise, it was just the tip of the ice berg.

He stayed like that for a while, processing the rage, allowing him to push it back so he wouldn't lose control and lash out on someone who didn't deserve to feel the brunt of his emotions. Eventually he reopened his eyes, his breathing once again even, to look down and see Nyota staring back up at him. "I've never seen you look more human," she commented.

"I do not know how to process that under the current circumstances," he replied.

"Jim being taken has put a lot of strain you, I realize that, but I thought without him you'd retreat back in on yourself. Instead I've seen you show more emotions in the last ten minutes then I have the whole time I've known you," she explained, a slight frown puckering her forehead.

He inclined his head to her, "Thank you for being honest...Shall we leave? I know they can't see us but they'll become suspicious and send someone to check on what we're doing eventually." Spock knew that he was being paranoid but he thought he had a right to be after Peters had told him that he was under observation.

"Yes, that's probably a good idea," Nyota agreed, "I'll meet you on the corner of Third in ten minutes."

Then she departed, her boots emitting soft noises as they hit the carpet and Spock was left in a dry type of silence that can only be found in a library. He leaned up against the large bookcase, feeling the shelves digging into him from behind but he didn't care, Nyota had given him so much information in such a short time. He felt defeated. Finding Jim was only a small triumph compared to what they were actually facing, it wasn't a mountain that they had to climb but a cliff face, a sheer drop beneath them with still a long way to ascend.

Yes, he knew where Jim was but he still didn't know when he'd get to see him and even when he did... That path of thought was best left alone for now, he decided as he pushed off of the bookcase and retraced his steps through the library, there were dragons down that path that he was not yet ready to face.

It was dark when he left the building, crossing the campus through the now misty night air. He looked up at the sky but couldn't see any stars through the fog and the clouds, Spock could just make out the moon, shining brightly behind her cover. He chuckled under his breath, remembering a comparison that he'd made what seemed like decades ago now, when he and Jim were first realizing their feelings for one another. Jim, he was the Earth, and Spock was the moon, forever in orbit around the man he loved. He'd told Jim about it once, explaining that he was a mere satellite, revolving around the object of his admiration. 'Yes Spock,' Jim had answered, taking Spock's hand and squeezing gently, 'but what is the Earth without her moon? She'd be barren, with no life in her to speak of.'

What Spock wouldn't give to go back to then, knowing what he knew now, back before Khan, so he could stop Admiral Marcus and Jim would still be by his side instead of thousands of miles away. The thought pained him and his step faltered slightly as he left the academy behind him. He missed Jim. It was like losing a limb. Jim was an extension of him and now that he wasn't by Spock's side it was like he was missing a leg, or an arm, he felt so crippled by his loss. Without Jim, he was nothing, practically an empty shell only capable of anger and base emotions that ruled him in a way he didn't think possible for a man with Vulcan blood running through his veins. That was it though wasn't it? Jim made him better, made him a better man, a better human despite the Vulcan in him, but without Jim he couldn't control this part of himself leaving him lost and broken.

He needed Jim like he needed air to breathe and as he walked the remaining distance between the academy and Third Avenue he had to stop himself from once again wandering down the path of what was actually going to happen when he saw Jim again. There was going to be no love filled reunion, he knew that much, and it didn't stop short of terrifying him.

"Stop thinking about that," Nyota said, stepping away from the wall she'd been leaning against to walk over to him. He looked around, sure enough he was at the intersection onto Fourth, where he was going to meet her. He hadn't even realized he was there, his feet carrying him through the city on autopilot.

"Thinking about what?" Spock asked, coming out of his daze.

"What it's going to be like when you see Jim again," she said softly. He didn't know how she knew but it was Nyota and he'd realized a long time ago not to question her and her innate ability to read people.

They continued to walk through the city in a comfortable silence, brought round by years of confiding in each other. Spock looked around him as they made their way back to McCoy's and Scott's apartment, which was now currently his temporary home, unable to go back to apartment that he'd shared with Jim whenever they were grounded. He just couldn't make himself do it, to walk through the rooms and feel Jim's presence around him, to see his little touches all over the place, the burn mark on the table from when he'd placed a hot pan on the wood, the lamp in their bedroom that they both detested but Jim refused to throw out because of the sentimental value, to be able to smell him in the air...Spock knew that it would have been too much. Even in the immediate time after Jim had been moved he'd not visited the apartment, instead choosing to stay in one of the cities many motels, using a computer that he'd picked up second hand to try and evade Starfleet.

Scaffolding covered many of the city's buildings, the recovery from being hit by the USS Vengeance already well under way. It would be a long time before San Francisco was fully restored though because of the extent of the devastation, thousands killed, all because of one man and his lust for war.

It started to rain, the weather seeming to mirror Spock's black mood, he knew such an occurrence was coincidental but it didn't stop him from making the comparison. Together, he and Nyota picked up their pace until they reached the apartment building, Spock using his newly cut key to let them inside and into the dry. Despite the short time in the rain, it had been the heavy kind that seeps through your clothes and chills your bones and as they ascended the stairs they both left a trail of water droplets behind them, dripping from their heavy uniforms.

When they finally made it inside of the warm apartment they were given a site to behold, the doctor was sitting on the couch watching TV while Montgomery and Pavel were lying on the floor surrounded by the insides of the Scotsman's computer. Upon seeing Nyota and Spock, Scotty jumped to his feet, "Ny-Nyota," he stammered.

"Hello Scotty," she smiled, unzipping her regulation jacket and hanging it over the radiator by the door. Spock watched with some amusement as the Scotsman's eyes bugged when his head while he took in the smooth dark skin of her arms and chest, the tight black vest she was wearing showing off her slim figure.

"Is there anything I can get you?" he asked, gulping as he watched her unpin her wet hair, letting it fall in loose waves around her, hanging down her back and framing her face.

"A towel maybe…and a dry pair of trousers?" she replied, running her hands over her wet skirt.

"Right…yes, of course, follow me," he stammered before leading her through the apartment and into his room. Spock watched them go with his eye brows raised.

"At least someone's getting some," McCoy said sardonically, his eye's never straying from the screen in front of him.

"I didn't realize they vere togezer," Pavel piped up, looking up from the piece of internal hard drive he was dissecting.

"Oh yes," Spock answered, taking off his own jacket and draping it next to Nyota's, "How long has it been Doctor McCoy? A month? Two?" He moved across the room to behind the sofa, bending down to rummage through the small bag that contained his possessions. Mister Scott had kindly volunteered to collect them for him after Spock explained that he couldn't bring himself to re-enter his own apartment. He pulled out a dry pair of Jim's jeans and a plain white t-shirt to wear. He knew that he shouldn't be wearing Jim's clothing, it caused him pain to wear them, made him remember just how much his lover had enjoying seeing Spock in his own garments, but with the pain came comfort at the memory of the love they had shared.

"Ever since we got back to Earth," McCoy grunted.

Spock left them then, heading for the bathroom so he could change in private. As he walked passed Scotty's closed bedroom door he could hear soft voices through the wood. It was very old fashioned, the apartment, without automatic doors and lights that you had to operate by hand, but Spock found that he liked it, despite the time it had taken him to get used to the manual processes of locking the doors and turning the shower on.

Now he stood in front of the mirror, looking into his very human eyes. Jim had done that to him, brought that side of him out of the cage where he'd locked it up long ago. Spock didn't know whether to be grateful or angry in that moment. His lover had done this to him but now he was gone, ripped away from him, unknowing of what he'd left behind.

When Spock returned to the main room, now dry and warm in Jim's clothes he found Nyota seated in one of the armchairs, wearing a pair of Scott's sweatpants and a towel upon her head, drying her hair. Her legs were tucked up underneath her as she watched Montgomery and Pavel scrutinize a tiny black microchip. Pavel was holding up in front of them using a pair of tweezers while Scotty looked at it through a magnifying glass. "This little bugger," he explained to room as Spock sat down on the sofa next to Leonard, "is the thing that meant Peters was able to track my progress through the archives. It was attached to my main hard drive."

"How did it get there though?" Nyota asked.

"I have no idea," Scotty answer truthfully, shrugging his shoulders, "It certainly wasn't their when I installed the thing, which makes me think someone's been in here while we were up in the black. The question is, what are we going to do with this thing?"

"Destroy the fucker," McCoy answered shortly.

"Ve can't," Pavel answered him, "If it stops transmitting readings then they'll know ve're onto them."

"Would attaching it onto a PADD work?" Spock suggested.

"Aye," Scotty nodded, "I don't see why we cannae. All I'll have to do would be to reprogram one so that it thinks it's a computer and not a hand held. It should keep 'em fooled. Shall we Mister Chekov?" The Scotsman asked the Russian, a slight glint in his eye at the thought of deceiving Starfleet.

Pavel thought about it for a few moments. "It is a relatively simple process," he answered, nodding his head to show his ascent towards the idea. The two men took to their task then, with a zeal that could only come from fooling an organization that they all used to have so much faith in.

A mere thirty five minutes later Montgomery held the PADD up triumphantly, a smile on his face. "Let's see the bastards try and track me now!" he exclaimed before he threw the machine onto the floor and said, "Can we order in some food? I'm starving!"

There was a murmur of agreement before the inevitable argument over what type of cuisine to actually order began. Finally they settled on Chinese food because that meant that Spock would be able to order something from the off-world section of the menu. After making the order Scotty commed Sulu, telling him to get over to the apartment as quickly as possible and to pick the food and some beer up on the way before he then reassembled his computer.

Hikaru arrived soon after, greeting everyone as he came through the door, carrying bags containing the requested contents, proceeding into the kitchen to place everything on the bench. What ensued was a flurry of movement involving clean plates being found and the food being dished out, Scotty and Leonard getting into an argument over the spring rolls in the process. Soon after though they were all seated contently back in the living room, Pavel being demoted to sitting on the floor since there wasn't enough seat's for everybody and he was the youngest.

Three helpings later everyone was quite satisfied with a full belly and a bottle of beer in hand. Leonard's eyes kept drooping sleepily and Nyota was resting her head on Scotty's shoulder, however, despite relaxed atmosphere in the room Spock couldn't help but think that Jim's lack of presence was hanging over the group, an almost visible weight pressing down on them all. "Nyota tells me," Spock said, addressing Hikaru, "That they've made you a Captain."

The helmsman's face twisted in disgust, "Unfortunately yes, and they wouldn't take no for an answer. Once the build of the USS Athena has been completed, I'll be sitting in the chair for her first jaunt up into the black."

"How long will that take?" Nyota asked, lifting her head, a frown creasing her brow.

"Six months, a year maximum," he shrugged, "I'm grounded until then thank God, providing the Klingon's don't decide to attack us, but it'll give me time to appeal my new position. There are much better candidates out there for Captaincy than me."

Spock stayed silent as the others continued to discuss the new ship. Hikaru would make an excellent Captain and they all knew it but the circumstances of him procuring his own ship were wrong. Starfleet were only doing it to get under their skin, to undermine all of Jim's achievement's by destroying the Enterprise instead of rebuilding her and making one his close friends and trusted crew members the captain of the fleets new flagship, despite knowing that the man wouldn't want to take the post in the first place. He hoped that the Klingon war Marcus so desperately wanted never came about.

Leonard got up then, disappearing into his bedroom and returning with a bottle of unopened vintage bourbon clutched in his hand. "All this ship talk," he explained, sitting back down and cracking the top, "It's made me nostalgic and since we're never gonna see her again…To the Enterprise and all the good and bad times we had in her." He took a large gulp before handing it to Hikaru who was sitting across from him on the opposite arm chair.

"To punching her into warp," he toasted, taking a drink.

Pavel took the bottle from him then and thought for a moment before he answered, a small smile on his face, "To the time Jim had Scotty turn ze gravity off for one afternoon." He too took a drink, his face scrunching as he did so before handing the bottle over to Scotsman.

"To her sheer beauty," Scotty said, his voice wavering slightly, "I'm gonna miss ye my lady." He drank and passed the bottle to Nyota.

"Lazy days on the Bridge," she saluted, taking a hearty gulp and entwining her finger's with Montgomery's before she handed the bottle to Spock.

He stared at it for a moment, his mind recalling his memories of the ship, of Jim. "To the family she gave me," he finally murmured, bringing the bottle to his lips and letting the liquid burn its way down his throat.

Soon after Pavel and Hikaru left and Leonard, Montgomery and Nyota excused themselves for the night, disappearing into their respective rooms, Nyota following tiredly behind the Scotsman. Doors were closed and Spock was alone.

With a sigh he cleaned the bottles up, knowing that if he left them lying around he would be unable to sleep. He never used to sleep, that was another of the many things Jim brought out of him. The meditative sate Vulcan's used to rest had always sufficed until one night, lying in bed with Jim breathing evenly beside him, instead of the lucid visions he was used too his mind had shut down in a way it never had before and he had dreamt for the first time in his life. It had become a habit after that and one that he could not shake, even if he sometimes woke up just a tired, or even more so, than he had before he'd fallen into slumber.

Once the apartment was clean and tidy he pulled out his bedding from the cabinet next to the TV and made up his bed for the night on the sofa he'd just been sitting on. After changing into a pair of Jim's old and frayed sweatpants he flicked off the lights and lay down for the night. Shifting until he was comfortable, with one arm under his pillow and the other wrapped around his bare waist in a mocking attempt to try and trick his body into thinking that he was being that he held, he fantasied of Jim and the times when it was he who was holding Spock, not his own arm, as they fell asleep together.

An unaccountable amount of time later Spock was woken up by the sound of someone walking through the apartment. Still slightly groggy from his dreamless sleep, he listened. A cupboard door was opened and closed, the tap was ran and turned off and then…nothing. Whoever it was, be it any of the apartment's other three current residents, they didn't make their way back to their room. He was certain they hadn't, he would have heard them.

Spock counted to one hundred and eighty in his head, three minutes, and still the unknown person didn't pass behind the sofa to go back to bed. Curious, the Vulcan got up, throwing the covers off of him quickly, his skin breaking out in goose pimples at the sudden change in temperature. As quietly as he could he sat up and walked to the open kitchen door. What he saw astonished him.

With his hands gripping the bench like a vice for support, Leonard was leaning forward slightly. His head was bowed over a full glass of water, his shoulders shaking while he cried silently. Now this close to him, Spock could hear his tear's hitting the counter top. Such a strange site to behold, the usually opinionated doctor, known for his cantankerous behaviour reduced to such a show of emotions that Spock knew the man considered to be classed as weak.

"Doctor McCoy?" Spock asked wearily, unsure of the etiquette of the situation. Jim would know what to do, he always did, but Spock had the feeling that Jim's absence was the reason behind the doctor's mute weeping.

"How many times," he answered without turning, his voice shaking and cracking with every other word, "do I have to tell you to call me Leonard."

"Forgive me," Spock mumbled. "Can I inquire into what is wrong? Maybe I could be of some help to you."

"Everything's wrong, Spock, and there ain't jack shit any of us can do about it."

"What happened, Leonard?" Spock questioned, trying to find out the information that had been plaguing him for days but had not been able to procure yet, "Why did Starfleet let you go so willingly?"

The man laughed bitterly then, raising a hand to scrub his face by still not turning to face Spock. "That day, when Jim woke up," he started to explain, "I left the room once I'd ascertained that he was okay apart from the obvious memory loss, I needed to find the appropriate medical staff. I'm a surgeon after all, I don't deal with the mental side of the practise." He turned then and what Spock saw in his eyes chilled him, his eyes showed that of a burning man, a man guilt ridden because of events that were out of his control. "They hyposprayed me, knocked me right out. I woke up in a biobed later on with an armed guard who immediately transported me the council chamber and had me testify in front of Peters that Jim was fit and healthy apart from his onset of the amnesia."

Leonard took a step forward; his body jaunting towards Spock in a way that made the Vulcan take a step back. "They told me," he continued, "that if I didn't stand up there and say my piece that Jim would be moved. So I did, and they sent him away anyway. I wanted to quit right then but I'm a medical man, a healer, I had people to take care of but then I got the task of notifying you. When I opened that body bag up, the one that had Jim in it, that site, I thought that broke me, I have nightmares about that but you, the look on your face when I told you what had happened, the way you refused to believe me. That was just as bad, maybe even worse because that made me realize, they hadn't just hurt me but sending him way, they'd hurt all of us. So after you left, I marched myself to Peters office and I quit. Oh, he didn't want to let me go at first, not until I started threatening to destroy the remaining samples of Khan's blood, the ones they wanted to culture, study and use. They can't use it if it's taken straight from one of them in status see, it doesn't have the same effect and he wasn't going to risk waking any of them freaks back up. He took me very seriously after that, even let me walk right out of there with the contents of my retirement fund written out on a nice little check…Does that answer your question?"

Slightly stunned, it took a moment before Spock managed nod his head, saying, "Yes, yes it does."

He was still trying to process everything Leonard had told him when the man picked up his glass of water and made for the exit, stopping in front of Spock. "Jim may not remember who he is, what he's accomplished," the man said, his voice low, "but what I don't like the most about this whole mess is that he's out there alone. We're not just his crew, we're his family and the council are brainless since they actually thought that we wouldn't try and succeed in finding him. Because of his father, Jim didn't believe in no-win situations, well my Daddy taught me that you never turn your back on your family, no matter what, and it's something I'm gonna stick by."

With that Leonard slipped around Spock and padded quietly back to his room, his door shutting with a small click. Having nothing else to do, Spock made his way back to bed, pulling the comforter over him as he continued to think about what the doctor had told him. He was right of course, the council were laughably inane if they thought they would leave the issue alone and proceed on with a normal Starfleet regulated life, going up into theatre to explore or to commence in battle, whatever was called of them.

The fact Leonard had been so blatantly lied to as well, they made him think that he was helping to protect his friend when really they had needed his testimony to be allowed to send Jim away. The iceberg was getting bigger and bigger, with just a tiny amount showing above the surface in the sea of lies Starfleet was reporting but at least Spock knew who he could trust and that was important. With these few people surrounding and helping him, he knew that it was only a matter of time before he had Jim back with him, time that couldn't come soon enough.

A/N: Thank you all of you beautiful people for all of the reads, followers, favourites and reviews! You guy continue to amaze me and I'm forever grateful! So...what did you think? Let me know your thoughts because it'll make me happy, haha, see you next tuesday my dears :D Much love! xx