A/N:
Yea...I guess I made a lot of people hate America... O-O Which is weird cuz I live there...Anyhow, I'm sorry...*dodges food and hides*
Thank you everyone who reviewed. It made me really happy. :) *hugs everyone including reader*
PS: xVAMPIRExEMPRESSx, thanks for warning me, I'll try not to mess up on the POVs
I curled up into a ball, trembling. I couldn't hear any sound of Russia or the others out to look for me. Suddenly there was a rustle in the bushes, I looked up.
"I-it's okay Germany, its only China," Japan said, getting up, brushing off leaves, followed by Germany and Italy.
"What are you doing so close to the Axis?" Germany asked. I didn't answer. His question came into one ear and left out the other.
"Ve? What's wrong with China?~" Italy said from behind Germany.
"No idea, Japan do you think you should call someone who can help? Family?" Germany asked, no-nonsense. I sighed. The last thing I needed was more people. Five minutes later came the rest of my family. Everyone nudged me, whispered quietly, shaking me gently. I didn't care.
"China da!" Came a call somewhere else. Immediately my head shot up, causing everyone surrounding me to flinch.
"He is probably home or-" France said from a distance.
"I highly doubt that," I heard faintly.
"China!" Allies were close. Did they not understand what privacy meant?
"China is here ve!~" Italy said, jumping, waving his arms. I glared at him, getting up shakily. I didn't want to run anymore, but I guess I had too.
"China da!" Russia said in relieved.I turned around and I tried running but someone wrapped there arms around my waist, lifting me off the floor.
"L-let go a-aru!" I struggled.
"Careful England, he can be feisty..." Alfred murmured.
"Let go England aru!" I said, squirming, "I thought you understood!" His arms froze as I slid to the floor, breathlessly.
"Understand what, da?" Russia-san murmured, confused. I looked at him. I guess I meant nothing to him. England gave him the universal shut-up-look, and bent down, sitting on the floor with me.
"Don't run off like that you git," He nudged me slightly.
"Did he say sorry, aru?" I asked quietly.
"W-well...Russia sorta..." England said nervously. He whispered quietly, "Doesn't care anymore...I hope he doesn't hate Am-"
"I hope he does," I snapped, "It's not fair that you get your happy ending aru," I choked, wrapping my arms around myself in support.
France knelt down beside me, "H-happy ending?" He questioned.
"He still loves America...its not fair ,aru," I couldn't believe I said the words out loud.
"What is he talking about da? Whats not fair?," Russia asked, a little annoyed. Immediately, France, Canada, England and my family started yelling at Russia at once. It hurt my ears.
"I-it's not fair aru," I whispered, as it went quiet suddenly, "Th-that I can love you so much...to a point till it hurts...a-and you...a-act like my feelings mean nothing t-to you...like I-I am of irrelevance aru..." I said. Everyone froze, as everything finally clicked together for them. Every time I would sigh, or look away, or leave suddenly, they knew why.
"What do you mean by 'love me' dah?" Russia asked shocked.
"Like now aru! Am I not good enough for you? I'm sorry that I'm not like America and eat all the time! I'm sorry for being so quiet and not talking so much aru! I'm sorry that you can't love me back, okay aru?" I yelled at him, quivering in anger. Mostly for myself. Because realizing that I could not be Russia's other half hurt me. Knowing that I can't be loved by him.
Russia stared at me blankly. England fumed behind me. Probably cuz I insulted America. America looked down guilty.
"I-I'm sorry aru..I shouldn't have yelled at you," I said quietly, after I calmed myself. I looked down, rubbing my eyes. I felt England relax next to me.
"You love me dah?" He whispered softly. I didn't answer. I didn't want him to say no. Russia cupped my face, seeing it streaked with tears. I never cried in front of Russia. Only before and after. He looked shocked and a little scared, "Why didn't you tell me dah?"
I walked quickly to the meeting. England was following me, a little nervous, and France, followed by Canada barely made sense what was going on.
"Today is going to be the best day of my life aru!" I bounced. France laughed, "Today my life will be complete and" I nudged England, "I get to help a friend!~" England blushed, "I have it all planned out, I am going to tell him I love him, then I'll show America how much he means to you, and it will be so...perfect aru!~" I sighed happily.
We reached the door, I was about to open it, then looked nervously at England, "I'm fine right?"
"You look great okay, j-just open the door..." He smiled a little. I opened it.
"Russia I lo-" I froze.
"I love you dah," He said.
"I do too aru," I smiled happily. England stiffened next to me. Something was wrong. At first I was confused, taking in everything slowly.
Russia-san didn't say the words to me. Russia was cupping America's face, kissing him.
I didn't know what to think. I hadn't realized what heart shattering meant until then. I broke, shattering into a million pieces. England looked at me, horrified at how my expression changed so drastically. I felt hollow.
They broke away. "I love you too Russia!" America said enthusiastically, though...it seemed off.
"What was that you were saying China dah?" He looked at me, happier than I had ever seen him. I trembled.
"N-nothing aru..." I said, realizing I was to late. By a few minutes. A few minutes could change everything.
It's not fair aru.
France and England were quiet, recalling the unfortunate events as well.
"He did," Canada said. Everyone looked confused. I never said that though aru. Canada looked at everyone's waiting expression, blushing, but continued, "He did tell you...America was just...faster. He wanted you to be happy, so he kept his feelings to himself...Plus, she showed you he loved you" Canada frowned. The quiet ones are the scariest. He knew way to much aru.
"He is right...don't you remember Russia?" England said, "He always kept quiet...he never caused you any pain...he was always there you bloody idiot, so you can stop blaming him," England added angrier. They were lying. I was never quiet. I was selfish, greedy. I spent every night up longing for something I couldn't have, crying for someone who wouldn't even take a guess. I fantasized and imagined things that couldn't never be real. I felt humiliated.
"China dah..." his voice trailed off.
"You can save your breath, I understand you don't love me aru," I said looking up, faking a smile. He didn't have any words. He just stood there, blankly, making no approach or retreat. Korea pushed him away from me.
"I-i-it's your fault isn't it?" He trembled, "You! You caused Aniki to come home upset! You made Aniki to wake up with his eyes wet! I-it's your fault!" I looked at him shocked. I thought I covered it up so well.
"You can't hide love China," France whispered.
"I try aru," I smiled. It was my job to hide pain, to look like I didn't care aru.
"Y-you love me China, dah?" Russia said hollowly, after Hong Kong calmed Korea down. I immediately blushed. He used the word 'love' and my name in the same sentence. I nodded, "I'm an idiot. You should hate me da.." I looked up.
"Don't ever say that. Ever aru." Was all I said, deadly. His eyes started to water. I was making him cry. Russia cry.
"I-I was so blind da. I overlooked your feelings and didn't even take the hint . Y-you're right, I didn't think you were anything da. J-just someone who I kept..as a last resort..." His voice trailed off. For a moment that stung. I hadn't thought of that aru. I was a last resort. The silence got heavier.
"Everyone," Korea said in conversational tone, "Did you know that...murder originated in Korea?" Then he leaped onto Russia. Everyone moved at once. Some screamed, others helped, others attempted to calm other people. Russia didn't even try to stop anyone. I gasped, choked in tears. So much commotion. So much of a jumble.
I pushed everyone away, until I reached Korea. I pushed him off of Russia.
"A-aniki...move," He frowned. Japan and the others nodded. My eyes narrowed.
"Y-yea..he deserves it..." Vietnam said, her fist clenching and unclenching. Japan held his katana tighter. I knelt to the ground next to Russia-san.
"O-over my dead body aru," I whispered.
"What do you mean ana? We are only trying to help you," He smiled bitterly.
"By hurting someone I love aru? I don't think so," I scowled, "Sure smacking or hitting when Korea does something stupid...or Japan takes something to far aru," I started, "But I didn't let you do this to your siblings aru..." I gestured at Russia. (he means bickering, not wars and stuf...i dun wanna go all complex...) Everyone looked down. I looked at Russia. He wasn't hurt that bad, but he had a bruised on his cheek and his eyes looked swollen. From crying. I hesitantly placed a hand on his cheek, wiping the tears with my thumb. He looked up at me, forlorn.
Russia POV!~
"Again with the sad eyes? Like you have been through so much haven't you? You haven't been heart broken aru..." China said softly, quietly, quoting me. He trembled slightly. I tried to speak but words couldn't come out. His eyes were slightly hollow, his pain was showing. I was a hypocrite. I was a jerk.
He looked at me tenderly, softly, lovingly. All the feelings I didn't deserve. But I had watched to many movies with my sisters. I was now supposed to get up, dramatically, leaving, making him come after me, then one of us almost dies, and we love each other happily in the end dah. Before I use to think China was always the person to go to when you were upset...he was always happy and had a smile on his face every time. L-like I was his world or something. But now I was looking up to...to...
I sat up as China immediately flinched scooting away, like he was bad or something. He blinked suddenly, his pained expression turning smooth, lighter. I blinked, startled. He got up, wiping his tears.
"W-well, I think we are making this a bit more dramatic than needed aru," He said smiling, "Let's just call the meeting off aru," He said, smiling at the Allies.
"B-but-" England started confused, and a little angry.
"Hong Kong, weren't we gonna go to the bookstore today aru?" He added pleasantly. He turned to Japan giving him a look.
"U-uh...Germany...we should continue the training," Japan said, pushing them away, till they left.
"Ve?" Italy said confused. China smiled at his siblings.
"Let's go home aru!~ Bye England, America, France, Canada...Russia aru.." He murmured walking away. England suddenly jabbed me.
"Hey!" I said, turning to him. He gave me a glare.
"I swear to drunk that I am going to kill you if you don't do something now," He said through clenched teeth. I glanced over at China. All of his siblings were doing the usual thing, as China walked behind them, his shoulders hunched. He wasn't perfect at hiding.
"Well what do you think I am going do? Run after him? Korukoru..." I replied. England's eyes narrowed.
"Got anything else?" I shrugged.
"N-no really man...listen to him," Alfred said, half behind England. I glared at him as he looked away, "D-don't b-be l-like me..." He muttered. Canada tapped his foot, hugging the bear closer.
"You know what korukoru? If you're such an expert at the whole 'using' someone, how can you be good at 'keeping' the person da?" I sauntered closer, venom running through my veins.
"B-back away git..." England warned. I stopped. America wasn't even worth it. America looked guilty, ashamed.
"It doesn't have to be like a dramatic movie type thing.." France added, interrupting my thoughts, "J-just tell him you're sorry,"
Canada suddenly frowned. "Do you even love him?" He asked. The question was offhanded, startling. I did not know how to answer.
W-well...um...yea... Please Review, tell me how you think of the story. (so dramatic)
Sorry for all the spelling errors, typos, etc.