AN:
Bekas Strife: Hey thanks! First review and follow! And yeah….. so am I.
Preludes to a Fall – Abstraction
Everything is black and white. We failed. There is no good side to this. So why can't I stop looking for one? Hope thought to himself, sitting once again in the throne room of Valhalla. It had been thirteen days since he'd woken – the same amount of time he'd slept. The coincidence did not go unnoticed.
The problem he was having with himself was that he felt no grief. Since he'd woken, he'd felt fine. A few things had presented minor to major shocks, such as the real state of the city and people. But nothing had truly bugged him about what he saw – he felt he'd known how it would be, and he was troubled by that.
What troubled him more was that he felt no grief. Lightning sat in crystal in front of him. He'd seen Serah's body, even if there was no trace of it now. Snow hadn't been heard from since two years after Lightning disappeared, and Noel said he was trapped in some coliseum. With everything that's happened, I imagine you're stuck there Snow, he thought.
The only person he could say he knew was Noel, and the conversations between them had been scarce. The only thing he had conveyed to Hope had been the fact that by the time the airship landed, the cockpit was empty. The cargo still held Fang and Vanille, so at least he had them. But Sazh and Dajh had disappeared. That only makes sense if they disappeared after we landed, Hope thought. There were so many problems with what had happened.
He took another step towards the gap separating the throne from the room and lifted his hand toward Lightning. "Can you hear me? Are you there? When I speak to the three of you, is it in vain?" he asked the air. He smirked bitterly at himself. Of course not. The bounds of possible and impossible stretch only so far.
He turned and surveyed the room. He'd done this every day since waking, first making rounds to Vanille and Fang, and then coming here and speaking with Lightning. Then he would survey the room, lost in thought until Noel found him. It was a routine he was only beginning to recognize, and one he wasn't pleased with. I need to start thinking of a way out of this. There has to be one.
The room looked as if an enormous battle had taken place within. Not many pillars still stood, and the ones that did were either crumbling or had been bystanders in the violence. The only thing untouched by decay and brutality was the throne in the center and the giant, swirling blue of the outer design. Even that had taken an impact in the battle, but slight. His thoughts slowly left the areas surrounding him and returned to the ones in his mind.
They had noticed an extreme spike in the magical abilities of people since chaos broke free. He felt that this must somehow be related to the rise in ability after the fall of the Cocoon fal'Cie, but he couldn't find the link.
Either way, he still didn't understand what had gone wrong in all of this. They'd all done everything they could. Where was the problem? Light footfalls behind him made him turn, his back to the throne. Noel took a few more steps into the room and stopped. He never looked at Hope. Instead, his eyes were also on Lightning.
"I still don't know if this was all her fault or mine," Noel said. Hope frowned in confusion, taking a stance that was a comfort to him. He held both his hands behind his back and straightened, putting his attention to what the younger man said instead of wandering. "What do you mean?" he asked.
"I mean she was in Valhalla. And the impression I got was that she'd been there for a while. She would have been able to see what was happening - what would happen. So why did she send me to her sister?" Noel said, still not looking to Hope. His face was a mask of calm over words anything but. He stood with his arms to his sides, leaning to one side. After a moment he crossed his arms and looked down to the side. "But I think it's me. My failure was larger," he said.
Confused, Hope tilted his head to the side trying to follow. It made sense what Noel said about Lightning. If she had been able to see with Etro's Eyes from Valhalla, she would have known the choices they had made would lead to disaster. That doesn't fit with the Light I know. The only time she lost regard for other people was when Serah was in danger… Oh! A thought struck Hope that sent him reeling back into his own mind. He crossed his arms and looked down as well, continuing his thought.
If what she saw was Serah in danger, she would have been able to fix what led to it. She wouldn't have led us to chaos. Unless there was no way to keep Serah safe to begin with. But if so, why choose this? It didn't make sense. Shaking his head, he realized Noel was talking again. Grimacing, he brought his attention back. It wasn't often the younger one spoke – he should at least listen. "…have heeded, and remembered, it wouldn't have happened, but I didn't. I got caught up in my own quest and seeing people and new things," he said, cutting off with a scowl.
With a very slow sinking feeling that he might know what Noel was referring to, Hope uncrossed his arms and stepped forward. "What was said that you should have heeded?" He knew immediately he had asked too sharply as Noel tensed before looking at him with grim determination.
"Caius told me that killing him would end the world. He told me that he had the heart of Etro. We later had it confirmed by Yuel that Etro had given him her heart after he'd sacrificed himself to save her first incarnation," Noel said. He continued in a rush. "He said that he goal was to have him kill me so he could end the world. But I didn't know. I didn't remember. It was so long before I came here – even before Yuel died." As he finished, he was looking at the ground again.
Hope stood staring. He wasn't shocked, but he was surprised. "Did you tell Serah?" he asked. Noel shook his head, but then got a curious look in his eye. "No, but she did see inside a dream of mine. All of that happened. But I can't imagine she knew it to be truth," he finished, shaking his head. "Anyway. I figured you deserved to know," he said, standing strait and looking Hope in the eye.
Hope kept eye contact for a moment, searching to see if there was anything else to the story, then nodded. "I thank you for the consideration. But I don't feel that this was your fault. If that was the case, you would be stuck in a loop. You aren't. Even if your future hadn't changed, it can't be the same either. It's not possible unless there truly is rebirth, and even if that were the case you would have thrown it off by being cycled too early," he said. He stopped at a look of confusion from Noel, and then realized he was skipping some steps. I always see things so clearly, why can I never explain them? he thought.
Cocking his head to the side, he looked at Noel. "Would you be interested in a conversation on this topic? Perhaps we can come to something that makes sense together," he said, motioning to the fallen and broken stone pillar that had been his 'bed' open awakening thirteen days ago. He was fully expecting Noel to decline, seeing the man's irritation and confusion on the subject, so when he haltingly nodded and started to walk to the makeshift seat Hope was a bit confused.
"What do you mean that she saw inside your dream? Was it of the past? And how accurate was it?" Hope asked as they sat together. He wished there had been a stone pillar to bring around so he could look at Noel; it was always much easier to hypothesize with someone when you could read their face too. He didn't have much experience with conversation not related to his career.
"When we left you and Alyssa in Academia, something happened. Serah and I got split up. The next thing I know, I'm home. The future, I mean. As far as I know, she saw it all. And it was more memory than dream, so it was pretty spot on," Noel said. He noticed that Hope face has fallen and gone sour at the beginning. "Something wrong?" he asked.
"Alyssa - about her. Three days after you left, she tried to kill me. She almost succeeded, but she started to… I don't know. Disintegrate in front of me. A few days later I found her diary. She was dead! She'd died during the Purge on Cocoon. The artifact she'd given you was… well, we don't know. Wrong, somehow. She'd admitted as much, along with the fact that she'd gotten it from Caius," Hope said. He had a bitter look on his face, and he was leaning forward with his forearms on his thighs.
Noel could tell there was a deeper level of betrayal. He was going to leave that note alone when, surprisingly, Hope started talking again. "It was also mentioned that should could remember the events of the alternate timeline you changed. She claimed she had changed the programming of the fal'Cie I would have created. She intentionally killed everyone to try to keep herself from fading," he said. He faced the ground.
Trying to change the subject, Noel tried to backpedal. "What do you mean a time loop? A closed paradox?" he asked. Hope looked up with an unknown expression to Noel and say up. He seemed to get an air of excitement, but then he always did when explaining.
"Not precisely. You would have to affect your own past for that. But you came further back than your own past – far enough back that it should have had no repercussions on your own existence. You were born in 700 – You can't be in a loop because we're still 200 years before that. Everyone dies. You did change your future, because you're no longer in ours. You come from an alternate…" Hope trailed off. Another thought had taken him. Could it be possible that there are other timelines Lightning saw? He looked over to her on the crystal throne. Could you have seen them all? Light, what happened to ours? Are we still in the same one?
"…Hope?" Noel asked, leaning forward. Hope was looking the other direction, towards Lightning, and appeared to be deep in thought. Suddenly he brought he head back around, face blank in thought. Realization slowly came to his features, and he looked down. "I'm sorry Noel. I can't seem to keep myself out of my mind recently," he said. "Anyway, my point was that this can't be your past Noel. The old future. You're already in our histories now. What's happened in this timeline was not your fault," he said.
Something kept nagging at Hope. A small memory of anger from Noel, but the younger man hadn't shown any. He hadn't been exactly hospitable the past two weeks, but there had been no real anger. Once more, he was brought out of his reverie by Noel.
"…hungry?" Hope looked to Noel blank-faced again, which made Noel laugh. Noel was starting to realize that Hope might need to have a good mood around as well, but in a very different sense than Serah had. "Come on. I caught a Pantopoda. I don't know if they're edible, but I'm going to find out," he said, standing and starting for the door. After a few steps he heard the rustling of fabric behind him, followed by footsteps.
Noel felt a little bit better, knowing that there was at least one person he was acquainted with still alive. I still have someone with brains on my side, and who knows? Maybe he'll figure out a way to fix everything. I'll stick around at least until I see that much.
They walked out of the throne room to sunset. They had yet to find out that though the days continued, time had stopped. There would be no death. No new life. They had yet to find out that the future was Hope, though they'd been told before.
AN: I know that this is slow to start. But it's going to be a big story, and I have a lot of things to make points of and get out, and it's going to take a while. Hope you like! RnR!