Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN BONANZA! OR ANY CHARACTERS FROM THE SERIES

"Pa?" I heard Grayson calling from the underside of my bedroom door, his voice followed by a light knocking from his fist. "Pa? Pa! Grandpa say breakfast is ready!" His voice soon disappeared along with the soft knocking. With a sigh I sat up in bed, and started to get ready.

It's been three weeks, surprisingly. And things have gotten better, but nothings gotten easier. Beth has been making sure Daniel get up and ready for school every morning. Something I should be doing, and promise myself I'll start doing tomorrow. Heavens know I'm scaring my children. And I know Alice wouldn't be happy with how I'm doing. A man after all is allowed to grieve, but he still has to be there for his family, and I want put the load off on my siblings. Or my oldest son to watch after the younger two, he shouldn't have to grow up so fast.

Shaking my head I slipped on my jacket and headed down the stairs to have breakfast with the family. Something I haven't done in three weeks as well.

We were all eating when a soft cry was heard from the living area, from a small bassinet beside the sofa, Beth was about to stand up but I p[laced a hand on her shoulder stopping her. Beth giving me a small smile sat back down, and I stood walking over to the bassinet where my child laid newly awakened. I couldn't help the small smile that came over across my face as I reached down carefully picking Felicity up She was still crying a bit as I held her close, cuddling her to my chest. It would end soon though, she was more then likely hungry and I saw a bottle of milk Hop Sing no doubtfully fixed for her.

"Shh, now little one, daddy has you." I murmured softly taking a seat and reaching for the bottle of milk that was still warm. Felicity looked up at me with big green eyes, eyes like her mothers. Though the black hair that was visible on her head was from me, she hadn't inherited the light brown locks of her mother.

Looking at her now though, I noticed several different similarities she had to me and her mother. She had a lighter shade of skin then me, like her mother. She had the shape of my eyes, but not the color. And her nose was indeed her mothers. But one thing I could see for sure, as the child gripped the thumb of my other hand in her small hand was, she inherited the Cartwright stubbornness. I wasn't why I knew this, it just seemed evident. Both the other children had as well. Though it didn't help non that their mother was almost as stubborn

"How come she gets all the attention?" I heard Daniel, my oldest ask drawing me out of my thoughts on Felicity. A frown came to my face as I glanced at him, he was glaring at his plate. He was jealous, I could tell, his face matched mine, when Marie died and Joe was babied for being the youngest.

"Hey, she isn't getting all the attention son." I said slowly watching him. "She's just a baby though, a new born. She requires more help and looking after." Daniel still glared at his plate and I winced silently in mind.

"It still isn't fair though!" He said stubbornly standing "Even Grayson got attention!" He said running to the door and going outside. I looked down at the table after my five year shut the door behind him rather loudly, before I too stood up, and handed Felicity to Hoss along with the bottle, and then I went out the door in search for my oldest son.

I found him up in the hayloft, picking up piece of hay and breaking them, a small frown on his face, as he kept his eyes to the ground. Sighing deeply I pulled myself on into the loft and over next to him. He ignored me though, and for a while it was quiet as I considered what to say to him, how to get a five year old to understand.

"Daniel… son. I know I didn't say anything to you, and that was wrong of me… But son listen to me for a moment." I was saying slowly to get his attention, I soon did as he turned his eyes up to me.

"I'm listening pa…" He said after a moment wrapping his arms around his legs, drawing them close to him. Giving a sigh I remained silent for a moment thinking over my words.

"I'm not trying to give more attention two your siblings then I am to you. And you all deserve the same amount. But you sister does require a bit more attention; there isn't anything she can do own her own right now. And she has to have me, and your grandpa, and uncles and aunt to help her…" He turned his face away looking at the ground. "She even needs your help, Grayson even needs your help like he does mine." I added. Even though he was five, I knew that if I added that own he would be more likely to cheer up, if he felt he was needed. And it did grab his attention; his head came up, his eyes staring at me with curiosity.

"How can I help?" He asked frowning, though his eyes didn't lose the curious glint. I chuckled.

"Well let's see… You're the oldest. And being the oldest means you have to watch out for your siblings. You have to protect them. See with Grayson you have to play with him, and keep him happy, make sure he isn't sad. And when he gets older and gets to school, then you have to make sure no one bullies him, and that he doesn't get hurt still. And Felicity, right now you need to show love to her, and make sure her aunts, uncle, and Pa are doing what they can to help her. And when she gets older you have to watch out for her in school, and make sure no boys hurt her. You have to keep them boys at school away from her, and make sure no one messes with her." I said watching Daniel's eyes go wide a few times, his face showing that that seemed like a lot of work.

"So I have to be like a… hero?" He asks excitedly and I chuckle, nodding my head at his enthusiasm.

"Yes you have to be your sibling's hero." I said, and he grinned for a moment before his face fell, and he looked at me for a moment.

"But who's going to be my hero? And help me when I need it? Who's going to help me with what I can't do on my own, and keep me protected?" He asked looking at the hay once more. I blinked my eyes to keep tears from them as I watched my son for a moment. Then I scooted forward and brought him into a hug, holding him close.

"I'll be your hero." I said softly, and I felt him turn suddenly and his arms wrapped around my neck as he buried his face into my chest. "Love you son." I said softly hugging him for a moment. I made a promise then, that I wouldn't provide less attention to my oldest, and I would be there for him.

Honestly this looked like ore in my notebook.