Author's Note: sorry for any delays in getting new chapters up – good weather = playing outdoors.
Sadly, still broke so I don't own squat….well, except for the made up characters
ZIVA'S POV
After going into my room from saying good night to Tony, I leaned on the door just wishing I could confess my feelings. Damn it, Ziva. Get it together, I thought. Being an American citizen now, has made me a different person – it has opened up my eyes to a new, stronger person. Especially since what happened in Somalia. I shivered in fear whenever I thought about that evil place.
Sighing, I walked over to my bed, and started taking my shirt and shorts out of my bag to change for bed. I apparently forgot to turn my TV off before we went to eat. The video for a song we heard on the drive down to Princeton. I couldn't help myself, so I set down on the bed and watched the video.
I dropped you off
Just a little after midnight
Sat in my car
Till you turned off your porch light
I should have kissed you
I should have pushed you up against the wall
I should have kissed you
Just like I wasn't scared at
I thought back to standing out in the hall before going into our separate rooms. I could only imagine what it would be like to have him feel what I feel for me. I wish he would have pushed me up against the wall. I have been so afraid since being in the dark place again. I was afraid I would be rejected because of my scars, both mentally and physically, as well as emotionally.
I turned off the car
Ran through the yard
Back to your front door
Before I could knock
You turned the lock
And met me on the front porch
My heart started racing when I heard a door across the hall open. I jumped up and ran to my door. I threw it open, to only find a closed door across the hall. I was angry with myself. I should know better.
And I kissed you
Goodnight
And now that I've kissed you
It's a good night, good night, baby goodnight
Still standing there like an idiot in my doorway with the door wide open. Taking in another second of feeling like an idiot, I slowly shut the door trying to listen for any movement across the hall.
You couldn't see me
Watching through the window
Wondering what went wrong
Praying that you wouldn't go
You should have kissed me
You should have pushed me up against the wall
You should have kissed me
I was right on the edge and ready to fall
After the door had shut, I stood once again against the door upset with myself. I looked out of the peephole hoping to catch him. I stood there wondering whether he would ever be able to look at me as more than a partner. Thinking back over all our years together, I saw all of my mistakes in trying to push him away. Then, this last time before I was sent on the suicide mission, I thought about how confusing all these feeling were. On top of that, I had come to realize how my father really thought and felt about me.
So I turned off the car
Ran through the yard
Back to your front door
Before I could knock
You turned the lock
And met me on the front porch
I walked back over to my bed with tears what fought angrily to fall making me all the more frustrated and upset. I started to change. After I put on my t-shirt, I looked down and realized it was one of Tony's shirts.
And I kissed you
Goodnight
And now that I've kissed you
It's a good night, good night, baby goodnight
Realizing this on my shirt made some tears escape. I swiped them away angrily and ashamed that I have let my feelings for him go this far. We are partners; anything more would just make everything that much harder, yes? I needed to call Abby to hash this entire thing out with her.
I turned off the car
Ran through the yard
Back to your front door
Half scared to death can't catch my breath
Aren't these the moments we live for
I grabbed my phone, and started to dial, when I realized the time. It was 0130 in the morning. I was worried about waking her up, so I decided I would try and sneak away and call her later on in the day.
And I kissed you
Goodnight
And now that I've kissed you
It's a good night, good night baby goodnight
It's a good night, good night baby goodnight
It's a good night, good night baby goodnight
It's a good night, good night baby goodnight
I really liked that song, I determined. I also figured that I might want to check out more country music just to see if all the songs fit life like this one.
Laying down, I realized sleep was not going to come easily. Besides this lonely despair of a love with Tony, I also had a nagging feeling of dread. I felt that something was going to happen, and it would not be good. As much as I tried to shake it off, I just couldn't.
Finally, about 0330, sweet sleep finally took me over…..
MEANWHILE
A black hooded figure stood outside of Ziva's room. Glancing around, he looked around. Even this early in the morning, gaining access to their rooms to complete their assassin jobs was not going to be possible. There were people still checking in and even checking out. Do these people never sleep? He though. They were going to have to come up with a new plan.
He decided to have a little fun with the agents though in the meantime, and took out a typed folded card. Laying it down on the floor, he added a crushed rose, and a bloodied glove.
DUH DUH DUH!
Thought I would add a couple of chapters for some Tiva love. Up next, Tony's night!
I hope everyone is enjoying this story! Please review, alert, favorite, and repeat. Reviews especially are like chocolate. Alerts and favorites are like the milk that go with chocolate….now I want chocolate. LOL. See everyone next chapter!
Also, this song is "Kissed You Good Night" by Gloriana. Here is the link, hope you like it! I LOVE this song! .