Restarting the Heart

Chapter 3:

So here's chapter 3, and from now on it's all my story line. Oh and thanks for the reviews, favorites and alerts.

Disclaimer: Honestly, I wish I was J.K. Rowling, but I will never be that cool.

Ginny was exhausted; it had been a long day. At the moment, she was sitting at one of the tables in the Great Hall, leaning on her mother's shoulder. Her eyes were red and puffy, from when the tears she had been holding in all day burst out, and she was sure her hair was a mess, and her clothes covered in dirt and blood.

She had not seen Harry since she had hugged him, just after he had beaten Voldemort. He had given her an unusual look, which she thought had been mixed between guilt and love, but she didn't understand it. She needed to talk to him, soon, but not yet. Right now she wanted to spend time with her family, to grieve.

All of the Weasley family were there, except for Ron and George. She knew that George was up in Gryffindor Tower, probably still in bed, and was refusing to talk to anyone. She didn't, however, know were Ron was. She had seen him, right after the battle had finished, holding hands with Hermione as they left the Great Hall together, but she hadn't seen him since.

Ginny sat up, and Molly Weasley moved to sit beside Arthur. She went and sat next to Bill and Fleur, who were sitting furthest away from the rest of the family. Fleur was on Bill's right, holding tightly onto his arm, so Ginny sat down on his left. He reached his other arm out and stretched it round Ginny's shoulders. They sat in silence for a minute, before Bill broke the silence.

"You ok?" he asked in a whisper. He seemed afraid of how his voice would sound if he spoke aloud.

"No," Ginny admitted, leaning her head onto Bill's shoulder, "but I will be."

Bill squeezed her shoulders lightly, and looked down at her. "I know you will be." He said softly, and once again they slipped into silence.

Ginny got up before long, and through the crowd, she saw Luna Lovegood sitting at one of the other tables. She drifted over and sat down beside Luna, where she found her engaged in a passionate discussion about Blibbering Humdingers with a 4th year Hufflepuff. Ginny didn't understand a word either of them said, but she wasn't listening too carefully.

When she saw the stars begin to come out in the sky, which was portrayed on the Great Hall ceiling, she decided it was time for bed. She said goodnight to Luna, and wandered over to her family, to say goodnight to them. Mr Weasley informed her that they would all be sharing Ron and Harry's old dorm room, and doubling up in beds. Her mum and dad were sharing the first, Bill and Fleur were sharing the second, Charlie and Percy were sharing the third, Ron and Harry were sharing the fourth and Hermione and Ginny were sharing the last bed.

She understood, her parents were trying to keep the family close together, and even though she would rather have gone up to her own bed in the girl's dorms, she didn't have the heart or the strength to argue with her mother right now.

She said goodnight to them all and trudged up the stairs, through the common room and straight up to the boy's dorm. When she got there, she saw Harry asleep already and Ron and Hermione sitting on one of the other beds, staring into each other's eyes and talking about something.

They broke apart when Ginny entered the room and explained the sleeping arrangements to them. She quickly chose a bed, drew the hangings, changed quickly, and fell into bed. She was absolutely exhausted, yet she couldn't get to sleep. She lay there twisting and turning, until the rest of the family came to bed. She kept waking up through the night, horrified at the sights she saw in her dreams.

The dream she was having was the same, over and over again. At first, she saw bodies, all her family, lying there dead. Then they disappeared, and Fred stood there, staring at her and telling her how he might have survived, if she had tried to save him. He told her that everyone would have preferred if she had died, and he survived. Although this was traumatising enough, the final scene in her dream hurt her the most.

She saw Harry, lying limp in Hagrid's arms, and watched as that particular part of the battle replayed in her head. In her nightmare, there was only one vital difference, Harry never got up. She watched as he lay there, and as Voldemort went through the crowd, torturing and killing the people around her; they had lost. Harry was dead; he wasn't coming back.

The image of Harry's dead body caused Ginny so much pain that she felt sure she must have been screaming and thrashing around in her sleep, but, to her surprise, each time she simply woke up.

Hermione would have told her it was an irrational fear, and that Harry was clearly alright, he was in his bed on the other side of the room. To tell the truth, Hermione and Luna were the only people Ginny felt she could talk to about her feelings for Harry. She couldn't tell her brothers, she knew that they would be shocked and possibly angry with Harry. She knew they were only trying to protect her, they were her brothers, it was their job, but sometimes they could be a real pain.

In fact the only members of her family that had known about her and Harry's brief relationship were Ron and the twins. This brought up a tidal wave of grief. She could never talk to Fred about anything, and she knew she would miss his comfort. She still had George to make her laugh and lift her spirits when she was down, but she wasn't sure how long it would be before he could laugh again.

She completely skipped over Ron; he was the last brother she would go to to talk about her feelings, except perhaps Percy, and she would rather talk to the Whomping Willow than Percy right now. He had come back before the battle, and had been welcomed with open arms. Well, not at first, but in the end the rest of the family accepted him back, all except for Ginny.

She wanted answers from before she could forgive him, most of all why? What did he think he would accomplish by turning traitor? Right now, she needed lots of answers, not just from Percy, but from Harry too. She drew back the hangings of her bed, and peeked over towards Harry and Ron's bed. She saw Ron, practically falling out of the bed, snoring loudly, and Harry beside him. He had his back to her, but Ginny guessed that he wasn't asleep. She might have gotten up and gone over to him, if it wasn't for a rush of tiredness that hit her just then. 'I can talk to him in the morning' she thought as she let sleep engulf her.

The next morning Ginny woke up to find that she was alone in the dorm. At first she just presumed that they had gone down to the Great Hall for breakfast. She picked out a pair of jeans and a Holyhead Harpies t-shirt to go with her Weasley jumper. She decided to get changed in the bathroom; she just couldn't trust her brothers not to come in, even if it was locked.

She changed quickly, eager to find her family, and to have something to do. Being alone and silent gave her time to think of everything they had lost in the war, Tonks, Lupin, Fred –

She tried to think of happy memories to stop herself thinking about the war, but everything she thought of seemed to have some connection to it. She thought of the hours that she had spent in the Room of Requirement, learning and fighting with the rest of Dumbledore's Army. This brought back very strong memories, of the months that she had practically lived in the Room of Requirement that year, of the battle, of Harry, and of Fred.

She pushed these memories to the back of her mind, and racked her brain for ones that did not have any connection to her suffering. She thought of Christmas at the Burrow, but these thoughts just reminded her of Fred.

She settled her mind on Quidditch and all the matches at Hogwarts. Whether she played or not, she always enjoyed them. She thought of the long hours she spent practicing and training, and the victory celebrations when they won.

As she left Gryffindor Tower, she pushed thoughts of Quidditch cup victories and post-match celebrations out of her mind and hurried through the castle towards the Great Hall. Some memories from the end of her fifth year brought up other thoughts, and even though they were happy ones, she would rather not have them.

She entered the Great Hall to find her parents, siblings, Fleur and Hermione sitting at the Gryffindor table. She noticed instantly that Harry was not there. She flashed a look of alarm and worry at Hermione who simply smiled back at her. Ginny took this to mean that Harry was fine, and took a seat beside Hermione.

Hermione leant down to Ginny and whispered "He's fine; he's in the Hospital Wing." Noticing the alarm these words caused, Hermione continued. "Getting cleaned up, you can't go through a battle like that without a scratch. I'm pretty sure he's fine, other than a few cuts and bruises." Ginny sighed with relief, and Hermione looked down at her, giving her an understanding smile, before she glanced over at Ron, then back to Ginny.

'That'll take some getting used to,' thought Ginny, as she blushed. She had seen something more in Hermione's smile, which made her feel like Hermione knew that she had spent weeks in her room after they had left, worrying for their safety, or that she had nearly cried when she found out they were at Shell Cottage, and she couldn't go see them.

Everyone in the Weasley family thought that there was something strange about Ginny's behaviour after Ron, Hermione and Harry's departure, but had said nothing, thinking she just missed them because they well the closest to her age, and she treated them like brothers and sister.

Bill was the only one that Ginny trusted with her secret. After eavesdropping on a conversation between Bill and her father, she learnt that they had turned up at Shell Cottage, Bill and Fleur's house, with a host of other people, with talk of capture, torture and Malfoy Manor.

Ginny had immediately set up a plan to get to Shell Cottage and see them. She had 'borrowed' one of Fred and George's invisibility cloaks, escaped the protection around her Aunt Muriel's house and disapparated to near Bill and Fleur's house. She had stayed at a safe distance and watched Harry digging a hole at the edge of the garden, between some bushes.

He was covered in sweat, dirt and, to her horror, blood. She walked further into the garden, so she could see the rest of the house. She glanced towards the house and saw Bill and Fleur watching Harry from the kitchen window. She headed in Harry's direction, and saw down on a rock near him. She sat in silence and watched him dig. 'He's digging a grave' she realised.

When she looked at his face she saw wounds all over it, he had some open cuts, some new scars, and his face was bruised and swollen in places. She also noticed that he had tears in his eyes, a few of which fell as he dug. This made her insides cry out in pain. She had never seen Harry cry and the only time she had seen him with tears in his eyes was at Dumbledore's funeral.

'It has to be someone closer to him than Dumbledore' she thought and there were only two people other than her who were that close to Harry. 'It has to be either Ron or Hermione' she thought, looking at the grave. It didn't look big enough for either of them, but they could charm it to make it bigger. She watched as he took a step back and wiped his eyes, and she noticed that he looked years older than he had before they left; his face had a tired look Ginny had once seen in Dumbledore.

She gasped in shock as people began to come out of the house, first came Dean Thomas, a boy from Harry's year who Ginny had once dated, followed by Ron. 'So it must be Hermione' thought Ginny sadly as the tears began to well in her eyes. Shock hit her face at Harry's first question.

"How's Hermione?" he asked; his voice was barely louder than a whisper and he spoke in a grave tone.

"Better," replied Ron in the same grave tone. "Fleur's looking after her."

Relief washed over her, but it was soon followed by a wave of despair; who was dead? She watched as Ron conjured up two more spades and began to help Harry dig. They dug in silence for a while, until Harry climbed out of the hole, which was now plenty deep enough for a grave, and picked up a small body, wrapped in his jacket. 'A child?' thought Ginny.

Ginny watched Harry as he wrapped his jacket more snugly around the body, and Ron as he sat down, took off his socks, and handed them to Harry who put them on the figure. She saw Dean hand Harry a woollen hat, and as he put it on the victim, she saw that it was a house elf, and one she recognised from somewhere. As they were dressing the elf, more people joined them.

Bill, Fleur, Hermione and Luna Lovegood stood slightly back, and Ginny was shocked at the state she found the latter two in. Both looked pale and shaky, Luna looked a little better though. She was wearing a borrowed coat; Hermione was dressed in a dressing gown, and looked like she had just had a run in with a dementor, which Ginny knew could have been the case. Bill spoke, alerting the others to their presence.

"We should close his eyes."

Ginny watched as Hermione took a nervous step forward, and grabbed onto Ron's arm, using it for support. Luna also stepped forward, reached down and closed the elf's eyes.

"There," she said softly, "Now he could be sleeping." Harry reached down and laid the elf into the grave before Luna continued.

"I think we ought to say something," she said. "I'll go first, shall I?"

It was clear from the looks on all their faces that they expected Harry to speak, but Ginny didn't think he would. Luna leant down and addressed the elf that lay in the grave.

"Thank you so much, Dobby, for rescuing me from that cellar. It's so unfair that you had to die, when you were so good and brave. I'll always remember what you did for us. I hope you're happy now." Luna looked expectantly at the rest of them, who muttered their goodbyes and thanks.

After taking a while to review Luna's goodbye in her head, she realised why Harry was so upset. Dobby had died trying to save them, and Harry's extreme guilt and selflessness must have been bothering him. He would think that it was his fault that Dobby had died.

Bill raised his wand and the pile of earth the three boy's had dug from the grave fell into a mound over the elf. Everyone waited a second, then turned to go inside, everyone except Harry.

"D'you mind if I stay here a moment?" he asked softly, his voice almost breaking more than once.

The others murmured words of support and patted him on the back, before turning to go inside. When they were gone, Ginny wanted to pull the cloak off and comfort and talk to him. She knew she couldn't, because he would freak-out and tell Ginny it was too dangerous for her to leave the house.

Harry went over to the pile of rocks where Ginny was sitting, and for a moment Ginny thought he had seen her. She guessed that he hadn't seen her, because he selected a rather flat stone from near her feet and placed it on the grave. He pulled a wand out of his pocket and craved something into the stone. As he got up and left, Ginny went over to examine the stone. She saw the words 'Here lies Dobby, a free elf' inscribed on the stone. She looked back towards the house and saw Harry go inside, closing the door behind him. For reasons she didn't know, Ginny began to cry.

She pulled out a photo from her pocket and held it tightly in her hands. Knowing that Ginny was missing Hermione, Ron and especially Harry, Colin Creevy had put together a scrapbook of all the photos he had of them for her for Christmas. She had removed one of her and Harry so she could constantly feel like she still had a part of him. She heard a loud gasp behind her and turned around to find Fleur not far behind her. Her wand was drawn and she was exclaiming in French. Ginny had noticed she did that when she was angry and was not looking forward to her reaction. Even though she suspected that the charm on her cloak had worn off, she pulled it off and looked up at Fleur.

Fleur's reaction was the opposite of what she had expected. When she saw she had been crying, she pulled Ginny into a tight hug and comforted her.

"Oh, Ginny Weasley, what will we do with you?" she muttered, half scolding, half comforting her. When Fleur noticed the picture in Ginny's hands she asked to see it, and Ginny handed it over reluctantly. Realisation dawned on Fleur's face as she saw the younger versions of Ginny and Harry together. They were sitting on one of the armchairs in Gryffindor common room together. Ginny was sitting on Harry's lap, reading through a large pile of notes while Harry stroked the back of the hair. Colin had taken it when they were not looking, and he had a lot of pictures of her and Harry.

"Zis is why you came, eez it not?" Fleur prompted, pulling Ginny back into her arms. "You came to see 'Arry." Ginny nodded and sat up.

"Yes," she whispered softly, wiping her eyes. "I had to see him." She shot an apologetic look at Fleur who smiled weakly and understandingly. She knew what it was like to be young and in love.

"You will come inside, will you?" asked Fleur, not waiting for Ginny's answer before continuing. "Zey are upstairs, you can go to mine and Bill's room. Zey will not see you."

Ginny nodded weakly before getting to her feet. Fleur waited for her before walking inside with her. Bill greeted them in the kitchen, nearly dropping the glass he was carrying when he saw Ginny. Ginny sat down at the table and let Fleur explain, handing over the picture when Fleur asked. Bill was surprised when he saw the picture and at first his older brother protectiveness was irked, but he knew that Ginny could make her own decisions.

"When was this?" he asked, pointing to the photo, when Fleur had finished. The two of them looked much younger than they did now, but it couldn't have been more than a year ago.

"Start of June last year," replied Ginny, smiling at Bill's shocked expression.

"You managed to keep this from all of us for this long?" he enquired. "You aren't exactly hiding it are you? I suppose Ron knows?"

Ginny sighed. Although Bill was the most understanding of her brothers, he was still her older brother, and to him, it was his job to protect Ginny.

"Yes, Ron knows and no we weren't hiding it from him. The only reason I didn't tell you all is because …" she hesitated, not sure how Bill would react. "We broke up, just after Dumbledore's funeral."

"Why?" he asked. She saw Bill's anger building up on his face, but he controlled it, which she was grateful for.

"He thought You-Know-Who would target me if he found out how close we were, and he wanted to protect me. He also knew that he had a mission from Dumbledore and that he had to do that so we couldn't stay together." She said sadly.

Bill's face softened at her answer, but his curiosity peaked.

"Ginny, do you know what their mission is?" he asked eagerly. "Did Harry tell you about it?"

Ginny thought carefully about her answer, but tried not to hesitate too much.

"Well, I probably know more than the rest of you, judging by how Mum and Dad are acting. He didn't want to tell me much about their mission, he only told me about it by accident. Sorry Bill but I can't tell you anything."

Well, I'd better get you back to Muriel's then." Bill sighed. "You ready?"

As Ginny stood up Fleur caught her arm.

"'e will be alright Ginny," she reassured her. "Il est fort."

Ginny smiled at her and stood up. "Thank-you," she said. "Thanks for understanding."

While Bill led Ginny outside, Fleur quickly made a copy of the photo for Harry. She would leave it for him to find somewhere.

"Ginny," called Fleur after them, holding up the photo. "Don't forget zis!"

Ginny smile appreciatively at her, took the photo and hurried back to where Bill stood, ready to disapparate. Ginny sneaked into the house and up to her room, ready to pretend she had been there all day.

"Ginny?" called her mother, bringing her out of her flashback. "Aren't you going to eat anything?"

Ginny looked down at her plate, which was still empty. "No Mum," she replied, "not hungry."

She left the Hall quickly, but she still saw Fleur's sympathetic look.