Chapter Four: Between Earth and Moon

Azula considered the Ember Island Player tickets in her hand. Then she considered the girl who'd put them there. Though Katara had been less than enthusiastic about the last play they'd been forced to attend, she seemed pleased by her purchase.

"Why exactly would we subject ourselves to this?"

"It's just us this time so we can make fun of them! It's the opening night of the new play so there's got to be a lot of stupid mistakes."

What Katara didn't say—and what Azula guessed easily—was that she wanted to get out of the house, and she wanted to take Azula with her. It was probably out of pity; no doubt Katara had sensed her recent visit with Ozai hadn't gone well. Katara had been overt in her attempts to interact with Azula recently, who put up with it for the sake of peace in her household. Or so she told herself. In any case, their interactions had thawed considerably in recent weeks.

Azula rolled her eyes. "You're the only person I've met who's willingly stepped into torture claiming 'it'll be fun'."

Katara's mouth stretched in a grin. "This is going to be awesome."

Several hours later, they met in the courtyard of the house to go to the theater. Azula experienced an uncomfortable jolt when she realized Katara was wearing one of her robes. There was something disconcerting about the embarrassment and pleasure it gave her that Katara could look so pretty wearing her clothes.

Katara fingered the silk ties on her arms with a frown. "I don't know how you stand these things." She untied her own sleeves, and the cuffs swept past her fingertips in the fashion of most noblewomen.

"You and my mother should join a club." Azula held out her hands for the sleeve ties and slipped them into her pocket. She lost enough of them to Ursa.

"Why do you wear them?"

"I'd rather my hands be free," Azula explained. She shook her arm to draw attention to the fact her cuffs ended above her knuckles. "Firebending through the loose silk that happens to be attached to your body is a recipe for disaster."

An old reason, an old excuse, yet it still fell naturally from her lips.

They were quiet in the carriage that took them into the city. Azula led Katara through the private entrance of the theater reserved for the highest nobles. She refused to sit in the seats inscribed on the tickets, and the theater employee took one look at her and scrambled to offer the royal box. They settled soon after in a plush private box, much to the anger of the family that had reserved it for the night.

"Did we just take their seats?" Katara asked in apparent dismay.

"I consider it a generous favor that they don't have to sit through this drivel."

Katara kept looking at her. Azula heaved a sigh. She didn't understand why this was a problem. "I suppose I'll send reimbursement and a gift basket. Will that do to quiet your fluttering conscience?"

"Yes."

With that stupid problem solved, Azula flipped through the rice-paper pamphlet, detailing the 'actors' and the plot of the play. "A romance," she deadpanned. "About a Fire Nation noble in love with his Water Tribe slave."

"What?!" Katara snatched the paper from her, her mouth open in incredulity. "No way! That's outrageous."

"Apparently it's an outrageous classic. Quite fitting that you wanted to come to this one, don't you think?" Azula cocked her head. "You don't suppose the lead actress was you for that play you talked about?" She wasn't entirely sure Katara had been portrayed in The Boy in the Iceberg, but Katara responded with a huff. "If she's fat and ugly, then yeah, it was her."

Azula didn't hide her smirk.

"Oh, shut up." Katara sat back in her seat with her arms folded, but her lips twitched into a faint smile after a moment of feigned anger.

"Did I say something?"

"You were thinking it."

The curtain opened and the play began on the wrong note, literally; someone in the orchestra apparently missed rehearsals. Azula and Katara watched as the two protagonists fell in love in one contrived scene. "Oh, that's realistic," Azula muttered, watching the woman throw herself into the noble's arms.

"It definitely takes more time than that! And a noble would never help his slave."

"She might swoon to earn a better position in the household."

"Not for that guy. What is up with all the long pointy beards of this country?"

"I can't fathom why men decide their facial hair is attractive."

"You never asked Ozai about his pointy beard?" Katara glanced over at her.

"Once. I accidentally set it on fire when we were sparring." She wasn't sure if her question or the act itself had caused his rage. He'd beaten her so soundly she'd taken two days off of training to recover. It was a lesson well learned: the beard was off-limits and disrespect was not tolerated.

Katara's laugh tapered off as she judged Azula's expression. "What did he do to you?"

"Spare me your pity." Azula's voice was sharp in warning.

Katara's soft expression didn't change, but at least she didn't say anything else. She tried to take Azula's hand, but Azula wanted nothing to do with that. Katara sighed and turned her attention back to the stage. After the first song shifted to a second, she leaned forward and gasped, "Ew! What're they doing?!"

Azula watched the actors moving in a terribly mimed rut. She pulled herself out of her sulk to answer. "Obviously they're in the act of consummating their five minute long relationship. I hope for her sake that the consummation lasts longer than their relationship thus far."

Katara flushed in apparent embarrassment. "Why the heck is it in the play?"

"They aren't really having sex," she replied snidely. "You'd have to go down the street for that."

Now Katara looked disgusted. "Isn't that against the law?"

"Obvious not, as it's commercialized."

"What's wrong with this country?"

Azula tried to consider it from Katara's angle as she justified the practice. "Because it is legal, we can protect our sex workers and gain a healthy tax from their business. You wouldn't believe how much the bored noble class will pay for a prostitute. There's an entire district in the capital devoted to pleasure houses. Muma District, if you're ever curious."

"You people are weird."

Azula took some offense to that statement. "I certainly don't employ them."

Katara's attention was firmly away from the play now; she faced Azula in their box. "Don't you think it's immoral for women to sell their bodies?"

The thought had never occurred to her. "Men do too," she pointed out first. "Who am I to judge a man or woman for making money in the service field? They hurt no one doing it. Even if it were morally wrong, the government has nothing to do with that."

"Isn't that the point of the law?"

Because Katara's question was so honestly asked, Azula held back her automatic sneer and gave her an honest answer in turn. This was a lesson drilled into her brain by tutors before she'd even understood the concept of morality. Azula practically recited: "Laws exist to protect the rights of citizens: to freedom, life, health, personal growth, et cetera, ad nauseam; not to chaperone their morals."

Katara pondered that for a moment. Maybe such matters weren't part of the education of a Southern Water Tribe citizen. In any case, a silly philosophical argument was better than the pity on Katara's face a few minutes ago.

"You said the right to health, right? How is it healthy to be a prostitute?"

Azula considered what she could remember about the precautionary laws of prostitution, and their conversation continued until intermission. Katara had never balked at arguing with Azula before, and she didn't now. Azula wondered what the Ember Island Players would think about the fact that they'd sparked a debate about the legality and commercialization of prostitution in the Fire Nation.

After intermission, the play once again reopened slightly off key. It matched the laughable scene of the slave woman giving birth to the noble's child. The actress was trying to sing her pain out in a screeching note that made Azula grind her teeth.

"Okay, no way," Katara said after the note petered out. Her gaze was riveted to the stage. "Have any of these people actually delivered a baby?"

"Have you?"

Katara lifted her chin with the utmost dignity. "Five!"

Well, someone had to do it. Azula shuddered at the thought. She'd seen one komodo rhino live birth, and that was enough to know she'd never want to see a human in the process. Much less be said human.

At the end of the apparently inaccurate scene, the baby's head—it was a badly constructed doll—popped off and rolled across the stage. The entire theater exploded into laughter. The actors did their best as they continued to sing out their promise to create a good future for a beheaded doll.

"Are they being racist?"

"You're giving them too much credit," Azula pointed out. "It's probably more a matter of incompetence."

"At least it's not a real baby."

"On that we agree."

When it came to the climactic fight between the noble and a generic Fire Lord, the Fire Lord swung across the stage on rope with fluttering paper fire beneath his feet. The rope broke and sent him tumbling offstage with a yelp. The noble gaped at the audience, inciting another round of laughter. To punctuate that, the iceberg background fell with a massive crash.

The play was over at this point; there was no salvaging this situation. Azula made a private pact that if the troupe ever went under financially she'd give them just enough funding to keep going. No more than just enough or things like this wouldn't happen. This spectacular example of incompetence should be rewarded appropriately.

After they left the theater, Katara pulled Azula away from their waiting carriage to wander down the cobbled streets on foot instead. Katara said she wanted dinner, but why they couldn't just go home to eat, Azula didn't know. Azula had never deigned to patronize a restaurant. This seemed like a venture that would end with a stomach illness.

Katara laughed off her concerns. "They'll take one look at you and be too scared to do anything wrong."

"Am I still that intimidating?" Azula asked.

"What do you mean still? Your intimidation is inherent."

Azula smirked, pleased enough by the compliment to ignore Katara's obvious attempt to mimic her speech pattern. Katara ruined the effect when she mocked a shudder. "Just like that. Absolutely terrifying."

They continued to wander the streets, Katara suggesting food and Azula vetoing it. She was surprised that something this simple had turned out to be so pleasant. Azula realized she'd reached a certain level of relaxation despite being in public. And then she was reminded why that was never a good idea.

"There she is! There's that crazy bitch who trashed our house, Dad! I know that's her!"

It took a moment for Azula to realize the shout had been directed at her. "And that is why I avoid going out in public," she informed Katara, who looked back at her owlishly.

Azula took a deep breath, squared her shoulders, and adopted her royal face. She turned on one heel and watched handsome, vapid Chan stride across the street. His finger was pointed at her in accusation. On another day, she would have ordered it removed. Today, the abhorrent breach in etiquette was hilarious as Chan's father, elder Chan, looked into her eyes and recognized her. The Admiral's face went white in pure animal terror. He seized his son by the shoulders and yanked them both down to the ground in the middle of the busy street, drawing curious stares.

"Honored Princess Azula!" Admiral Chan all but shouted. "My humblest and deepest apologies for my son's words. He clearly is mistaken! We are forever in your debt and service!"

A cart jerked to a halt to avoid running over the two men. Several more pedestrians paused on their walk to watch the scene unfold until a small crowd had formed.

Chan's entire body stiffened, and if anything, his head sank closer to the ground. She could almost sense his imagination running through a list of horrible punishments she could legally enact to right the wrong of his words and actions. Why had she ever thought this stupid boy was attractive?

Azula stepped close enough that her boots were in sight of the prostrate men. She looked down her nose at them and smiled sharply purely for the watching crowd. "Admiral Chan, how are you? I would expect a man as decorated as you to be out at sea, protecting our trade vessels from the pirates that are determined to take a bite out of our export profits."

"Thank you for your kind words, Princess. I've recently retired from the navy."

"Probably for the best," Azula gave a wistful sigh. "Your soldiers did report you have terrible communication skills." The Admiral's shoulders flinched. "Well, good day, Admiral. Chan, tell your nana that I said hi."

Her thinly veiled threat hit home. Younger Chan whimpered.

She turned and swept by the watching nobles. They bowed almost in unison as she walked by. Katara fell into step beside her a moment later. Azula prepared herself for Katara's chastisement about being rude or whatever other pettiness she would latch onto. She was surprised when Katara began to giggle. "Did you really trash that guy's house?"

"He insulted my brother and me."

"Overkill," Katara pronounced. "Did he not know who you were?"

"I don't have much occasion to mingle with people my own age. At the Royal Academy, I shared classes with the older girls. After I graduated, I attended war meetings, not parties; hence the Admiral recognized me but his son didn't."

Katara was silent, and Azula glanced over, expecting a sarcastic comment. Katara was giving her a gentle look that shifted into a slow smile. She said, "I bet you'll get more party invitations now." Her voice was soft, and she took Azula's hand just to give it a gentle squeeze.

"We'll see." Azula's reply lacked vigor. She was strangely shy...too much so to protest the touch.

One morning several weeks later, Azula searched through the growing vegetation that would one day block the shore's view of her house. It was a hot day with humidity heavy in the air. She looked forward to the cooling thunderstorm that was sure to sweep through in the evening.

There was something chirping in the woods. It had driven her to distraction that morning. She'd awoken to it and hadn't been able to focus on her meditation because of the noise, and still it continued. She searched now for the source to silence it. She suspected a booby had fallen from its nest and was starving because its parents were too stupid to bring it food on the forest floor. The cheeping sounded very close to her, and Azula turned to her right, drawing up a leaf of heavy vegetation.

Instead of a booby, there cowered a tiny bearded kitten. It trembled and gave that loud chirping cry. She reached out to pick it up and take it down to the sea to drown it—the greater mercy, certainly. Then, in the circle of her arms, it sighed and snuggled against her body.

It was a pitiful worthless little creature covered in fleas and doubtless filled with worms. Yet somehow Azula found herself carrying it up to the house.

Ozai had never allowed her a pet. He proclaimed they were too much trouble and a distraction. At the time, she'd wanted to point out servants existed to ensure there would be no trouble or distraction, but the argument was worthless when the only animal she'd wanted was a mongoose dragon. He'd allowed her that because she'd broken it herself. If she could break a mongoose dragon, surely she could deal with a stupid animal like this.

Her staff gaped at her before their self-preservation instincts kicked in and they busied themselves. Then her capable bodyservant took control. Kota ordered the chef to warm milk and meat-meal and sent for a veterinarian. Azula watched her servant mix the milk and meal together into a slop of disgusting looking mush. The bearded cat fell on it and ate it with relish. It snorted like a piglamb with each mouthful.

"It will need to be bathed," Azula mused. "And wormed."

"I'll see to it, Princess."

"No." Azula ignored Kota's evident surprise. "Bring me warm water and soap. I could hardly trust anyone else to deal with this little beast."

Azula had lost her mind. She knew she had; her servants knew she had. It didn't help when Katara wandered into the study to gape at her. No doubt she'd approve once she'd gotten over her shock.

"Is that a kitten?"

"No. It's a mongoose dragon hatchling."

Katara sat down next to her as Azula scruffed the little beast and rubbed soap into its fur, then splashed water on it. A fat flea crawled onto the kitten's face to escape the water. Azula crushed it between her fingers with relish.

As she bathed it, she explained, "Several hundred years ago these animals were considered evil in a southern Earth Kingdom port city. They were hunted and killed to release their so-called evil spirits. In the years that followed this frenzy, the majority of the citizens who lived at the port died from sickness. It enabled the Fire Nation to capture the city, but it was pointless. No ship would sail there anymore. Earth Kingdom citizens stupidly believed the die-off was evil spirits inhabiting their people. In truth, without the cats to eat the vermin from the docking ships, the vermin plague swept through the city. So, bearded cats are fairly useful creatures."

She looked up; Katara stared back at her expressionlessly. Her bright eyes drew Azula's notice. "Interesting history lesson." Katara's tone suggested she felt the opposite. Azula shook herself from the strange trance she'd fallen into when Katara continued, "Where did you get this fairly useful bearded cat?"

Azula framed her sarcastic reply: 'Excuse me for informing your ignorance.' She wasn't sure why she didn't say it. Instead, she told the truth: "It woke me up this morning, crying in the brush."

"And you're going to take care of it?"

"It's true, the greater mercy would be to drown the poor thing. But Mother's been complaining about the lack of animals here. I might as well give her a mangy, wormy little beast to sleep in her bed during her visits." Azula lifted the kitten by its scruff and considered it. It shivered and gave a little cry with its tiny paws swinging at the air. It was shockingly ugly when wet.

Katara raised one eyebrow, clearly not buying Azula's excuse. Azula sighed and rolled her eyes as she began to dry the mewling kitten in a thick towel. The beast was shivering rather dramatically from the water. "Or pretend this is evidence that I have a soul if that makes you feel better."

Katara held out her hands. "Let me."

Azula handed the kitten over and watched as Katara bent the water from its fur. Almost instantaneously, the kitten's fur puffed out. Katara cooed and smooched at it like an idiot.

Kota stepped into the room, and she brought with her a thin, scruffy man. "Princess, this is a veterinarian, Koh Lee."

"Princess, it's an honor." He bowed twice and then remained bent at the waist appropriately as he waited for her to acknowledge him.

Wordlessly, Azula took the kitten from Katara and handed it to the veterinarian. He straightened for his examination. The man looked in its ears—"No mites"—checked its teeth—"Five weeks, a little thin of blood"—pulled up its tail—"female"—listened to its heart—"sounds good"—and rubbed its belly—"who's a pretty girl?". He set the kitten on the ground, and it staggered around a little unsteadily.

Azula had already decided this man was a moron, but he gave her a more intelligent report. "She's malnourished and probably has a heavy worm load. They seem to get them from nursing from their mother, which is a good sign in this case. She's weaned at this age so solid foods are best—at least four times a day until she gains weight. You don't need to worry about stimulating her voiding behavior."

She must have looked as disgusted as she felt because the man paused and gave another bow. "As I said, you needn't worry."

"Then why did you mention it?" she asked darkly.

He bowed again; a tremble had set in on his shoulders. Katara elbowed Azula sharply. She shot Katara her harshest glare and turned back to the man. "Continue."

Still bowed, he set down his bag and withdrew a thick paste. He slathered a small amount on his fingertip and rubbed it against the top of the kitten's mouth, invoking a few lip-curling licks.

After he left, Katara rounded on Azula. "Why were you so mean to him?"

"I'm a mean and horrible person," Azula replied dryly. She picked up the kitten, turned it over, and rubbed a finger over its fat belly, provoking a few pitiful chirps of protest. "Naturally, since I'm a monster."

Katara heaved an exaggerated sigh. "I'd take you more seriously if you didn't say that while you were playing with a kitten."

"I'm not playing," Azula sniffed with utmost dignity. "I'm estimating how many worms are parasitizing this animal."

"Uh huh."

There was no doubt that Katara could and would believe what she wanted. If she took it into her head that Azula had a conscience, who was Azula to dissuade her?

That night, the kitten mewled from within the basket that Kota had set up for it in Azula's room. Azula got up, angry that her sleep was interrupted. The kitten quieted when she picked it up, and before she could think better of it, she carried it to her bed. Beneath the silk sheet, it stretched out full-length against her body, heaved a sigh, and fell asleep.

Go figure. The thing was cold.

It took Ursa the entirety of breakfast the first morning of her visit before she noticed the kitten. It currently rolled on the floor—its belly fat now from food, not worms—and batted at the cuff of Azula's trousers.

"What in the world…"

Azula reached down, plucked up the bearded cat, and held it out to her mother. Ursa set down her teacup and reached out to cradle its chest in her hands. The kitten's hind end hung towards the floor awkwardly. She stared at the kitten like it was a figment of her imagination. "Do you have a cat now?" she finally asked.

"Do you want it?"

Ursa blinked down at the cat. It reached out a clawed paw to bat at her hair. "When I suggested you adopt an animal, I was thinking something more…clean. Like a dog."

"It's remarkably clean. It spends several hours a day licking itself, including its anus."

Ursa's lip curled in disgust. Azula barely managed to contain her laugh. Katara wandered out on the veranda and butt in with her own opinion. "Hi, Lady Ursa. They're actually cleaner than dogs. And she's just the cutest little kitten. Look at all her colors!"

Azula rolled her eyes. Ursa put the bearded cat down on the floor. It began to chirp as it pounced on Azula's feet to lick her bare toe vigorously. Azula picked it up and settled it under her arm. The little beast settled down and began to purr. "Would you like it to sleep on your bed tonight, Mom?"

Ursa's lips twitched again in distaste.

Katara rolled her eyes and gave an untimely diversion. "That would mean you'd give her up." She turned to Ursa. "Azula hogs her all to herself."

"I cannot help that the animal innately understands what the superior bed in this household is."

"She loves you." Katara folded her arms and smiled softly. Azula hesitated and had to forge past the shyness Katara's expression stirred in her. She said, "It's a beast. It has no concept of love. It simply knows that I provide food and shelter."

"She loves you, and you eat it up." The look was more pointed now.

"I suppose I could eat it," Azula replied, giving the kitten a judging glance.

Katara rolled her eyes with that affectionate smile still on her face. The expression made Azula's stomach flip in a not entirely unpleasant way. When she turned back to her mother, Ursa's smile surprised her. She said, "I'm glad you two have become friends."

Katara didn't seem as surprised as Azula had expected. Instead, she met Azula's gaze evenly. Azula looked back at her, unable to formulate an expression that was appropriate. A friend? Katara frightened her too much to be a friend. She had no reason to be with Azula except by her own whims. If she couldn't demand Katara to remain here, how could she keep her close?

Only a few hours later, Ursa managed to repay Azula for the scene that morning. She hovered in front of Azula's desk until Azula looked up. Ursa handed her several leaves from a book. "I'm concerned," she pronounced. "I learned last week that your lessons never included music, despite your assurances to me that the opposite was true."

In Ursa-speak, it meant, 'You lied to me.' Azula set down her book and picked up Ursa's papers, which were music sheets. She recognized the music as a woman's range of the Fire Nation Anthem. She could sing this in her sleep. "I didn't lie. I know how to read music. I also know how to sing. These things, however, will not help win a war."

"Music is a key part of a young woman's educational curriculum."

Her teeth ached from the force of her jaw clenching. She'd gone out of her way as a student at the Royal Academy to avoid as many useless music classes as possible. Once she'd graduated, she had thought that would be the end of it forever. "What do you want me to do with this, Mother?"

Ursa folded her arms. "Practice."

She could argue; she could refuse. And then Ursa would nag at her for the entire visit. Azula exhaled tightly. She stood up, held the leaves in one hand, and pressed her other hand to her diaphragm. She inhaled sharply with her diaphragm as she'd been trained. She warmed up with a scale and immediately began the anthem. As if any firebender couldn't sing. As if the Princess of the Fire Nation hadn't been trained to death to sing the Fire Nation Anthem.

After the last note, she looked up from the music and asked, "Will that suffice?"

Ursa's eyes were wet with tears, and Katara was partly in the doorframe, watching Azula with wide eyes. She was spooked by their reactions. "What?"

"Your voice… You have my mother's voice," Ursa whispered.

Azula's maternal grandmother had died before she was born. She had no emotional connection to the woman, but if she didn't say something soon, Ursa was going to break down. She went with something that might provoke anger. "Aren't we all thankful I didn't take after Iroh then?"

Iroh, who had been loitering the hallway, stepped into the room just to say, "I resent that!" He was smiling.

Ursa's apparent emotional crisis passed. She wiped her eyes and asked, "What instruments do you play?"

Azula slapped the papers against her leg irritably. She thought of a thousand other more interesting things she could be doing right then—which would be anything. Royal lessons had included learning an instrument, but she'd played around on a pipa purely because it was unladylike. Maybe the 'masculine' instrument would be a good diversion. "I learned on a pipa."

Ursa's eyes flashed. To Azula's shock, she gave no statement towards the type of instrument and said, "I'll have one delivered immediately."

Well, that was a miscalculation on her part. "No."

"It'll be fun." Katara had interjected before Ursa's thunderous expression could become sharp words. After Katara's pronouncement, Ursa's expression softened. She nodded in agreement. "Yes, fun. Sweetie, music would be a lovely addition to the household."

"If I wanted music, I would hire a musician," Azula pointed out. "There is no reason to do so myself."

"Music stimulates the mind," Iroh chimed in.

It nearly stimulated Azula's middle finger, but she didn't dare even imagine her mother's reaction to that rude gesture. "I'm going to mediate." She stepped off the study's veranda and dropped into the sand for a timely escape, at least for a few hours. It wasn't much of an escape. Iroh settled down next to her, and she shared her meditation and exercises with him. At least he didn't make her sing.

Ursa had the instrument delivered that afternoon, and the household seemed to think it was an excuse for a gathering. Azula was herded onto the settee in the study and handed the pipa. She glowered at the three people who sat across from her. She had no doubt there were servants listening in the hallway as well.

"Go on," Ursa commanded.

Perhaps she could make this worth her while, given her audience. The best defense she had against these silly trials with the arts was being so bad Ursa gave up on her. Azula strummed the opening cords of an old folk song, and Ursa smiled in response. "Oh, The Earthbending Man. I like this one."

Maybe she liked the original. Azula was going to perform the ribald version that was a particular favorite of Fire Nation soldiers.

"Gather 'round and hear my story
About an Earth Kingdom tory.
He was a man of greatness and glory
Who made any woman whorey!"

Ursa's smile fell away as Iroh's widened. Katara's eyebrows climbed her forehead. Iroh apparently knew this one, and he began to laugh.

"The girls of all nations did flock
To fondle his glorious rocks
And sit on his massive thick co—"

"Stop!" Ursa cried. "Stop, please."

Azula adopted an innocent tone. "But, Mom, there are four more verses."

Ursa's glare was sharp, but she turned it on Iroh, who was roaring with laughter at this point. "You aren't helping!" She turned her anger back to Azula. "I know what you're doing, missy, and I don't appreciate it."

Iroh wiped tears from his eyes and cleared his throat. "Ursa, perhaps it's time to concede defeat about this matter."

Still chuckling, he patted Ursa's shoulder and reached out for the pipa. Azula counted this a victory and gratefully gave it up. The rest of the day, he monopolized it. He plucked strings and strummed cords into silly little songs. They were pleasant, not that she would ever admit it. At least she didn't have to waste her time providing the musical entertainment.

After dinner, Azula finally glimpsed escape and walked down to the ocean in the soft grayness of coming night. Footsteps hissed behind her. The entire day she had not had a moment to herself, and now this…

"What do you want now?"

"I'm going for a walk."

Azula was surprised by Katara's voice. She'd expected Iroh or Ursa. "I didn't ask you to join me."

"I'm not joining you," Katara said, belying the fact that she now walked alongside Azula. On that very same breath, she continued, "It's a nice night. Iroh's playing is pretty. A lot prettier than your song turned out to be."

"It was a nice night, or it would be if you weren't here. Subjunctive is the correct tense, as the niceness of this night is hypothetical and no longer reality."

"You're such a dork."

Azula drew up short, as stunned by the insult as Katara's laughing tone. "What did you call me?"

Katara grinned at her. She had a nice set of straight white teeth, and she used them to full effect with that wide smile. She giggled. Katara was giggling at her. Azula took a steadying breath and clenched and unclenched her fists. What had happened to the fear that she used to measure in this girl's eyes? Had she lost whatever respect she'd held by being dangerous? Azula tried to ignore the part of her that was so pleased to provoke this response.

"You have a nice singing voice."

"Dear Agni," Azula whispered under her breath.

"I mean it. It's…rich," Katara said. She took a few quick strides to catch up to Azula, who attempted in vain to outpace her. "Do you like to dance?"

Dancing, as the Royal Princess of the Fire Nation? Commoners danced because they knew nothing better. Nobles of other countries danced because they had no dignity. "Have you lost your mind, waterbender?"

"My name is Katara," she said.

Azula stopped so that the full effect of her eyes rolling was not lost. "No, I had forgotten it in the few hours I haven't spoken it. And here I thought it was clear I didn't use it to provoke your anger."

"And distract me from my question. Which didn't work. Do you like to dance?"

"I have never danced, nor will I. It is unbefitting for a person of my station to do something so…undignified."

"I think you'd like it. It's just like fighting." Katara moved slowly, her feet shuffling to the gentle twang of Iroh's pipa.

Azula folded her arms. "You look ridiculous."

Abruptly, Katara lurched forward, and Azula instinctively twisted sideways to avoid the hit. Katara didn't follow through; she attacked with another slow, simple maneuver, and Azula shifted away. Once, twice, three times, and suddenly she felt the flow and shift of it, in time with Iroh's steady pipa notes.

Azula stepped into the next movement, sliding into an attack as Katara shifted back to start her own, and it was suddenly graceful and strong, and as interesting as sparring. The point now was novel: not to touch or parry but to mirror and compliment. It was like spontaneous katas.

What use did she have for dignity anyway? She'd thrown it away the day she bowed to Iroh.

Katara reached out and caught her hands, and their movements connected until Katara stepped into Azula and their ankles tangled. They fell in an undignified heap in the sand. Azula was highly cognizant of the fact that this was as close to an embrace as they'd come in weeks; it was a peculiar feeling.

Katara's face was a silhouette against the night sky, lit slightly on one side by the lamps set out on the house's veranda. She'd worn her hair down that day, and some of it brushed across Azula's face, bringing with it an earthy fragrance she'd begun to recognize as Katara's. Azula's hand moved of its own accord, and she touched Katara's face. Their skin met in sharp contrast even in this light. Katara's cheek was soft and warm under her fingers.

Azula looked into Katara's eyes, and Katara looked back at her.

It was a fragile moment.

Katara's smile softened dramatically and her eyes flickered from Azula's eyes to her mouth. "I don't think I've seen you smile like that before."

Azula quickly pulled her hand back and schooled her expression. She couldn't imagine what sort of emotion she'd betrayed. She didn't like what she felt in that moment: vulnerable. Her voice's normality surprised her after such an intense moment. "That's because you often annoy me."

Something about the set of Katara's mouth betrayed disappointment though she was still smiling. "So I don't annoy you all the time, huh?"

"Take advantage of my generous mood, Katara." She sat up and shook some sand out of her hair in sudden irritation. She felt like she'd missed some subtle cue in the last few moments.

"I like you."

That pronouncement was enough to draw a startled glance from Azula.

"I never expected that I could like you, but I do." Katara stood up, brushed off her trousers, and held out her hand to Azula.

Azula only hesitated a moment before she reached up and accepted Katara's hand. She was once again struck with uncharacteristic shyness. This seemed like the time to return the sentiment or…just something. But she couldn't form any words.

What would she say? 'You caused everything to go so wrong in my life, but somehow you're the one thing that seems to be going right for me now.' She couldn't say that. She just couldn't.

Katara squeezed her hand, and Azula realized maybe Katara didn't need the words at all.

Time seemed to move more quickly with a housemate. Before Azula realized it, Katara would be living with her to see four full moons pass over Ember Island in a few nights. She'd found some sort of happiness despite her ennui, and Azula wasn't self-delusional enough to pretend Katara hadn't in part caused it. Who would have thought?

Of course they still argued. Of course Katara still thought she was 'rude' and 'mean' and didn't mind pointing it out. But in equal parts Katara seemed to enjoy their interactions. Azula enjoyed the arguments and being called petty names as much as she liked when they got along, something she'd never expected. It scared her and excited her in equal parts, and she tried hard not to think about why.

She knew that Katara would leave at some point, but nothing prevented her from enjoying her company while she was there. Azula stretched in the sun and wondered vaguely how she could convince Katara to stay a little longer.

As if summoned by her thoughts, Katara's shadow blocked Azula's sunlight momentarily. Then she shook out her towel and lay down next to Azula, briefly startling the bearded cat lying against her side.

"Are you ever going to name the cat?"

It was a horribly obnoxious beast now that it had recovered from its weaknesses. It was fat, energetic, and followed Azula everywhere. At night, it slept on her bed no matter what pains she took to keep it off. Her majordomo probably had already suffered a nervous breakdown trying to keep cat hair off of the furniture. The worst insult though was that it had a fixation on licking her toes. Even now, lying on the beach, she'd had to keep it from settling on her for a nap. Instead of wandering off, it stretched out against her side and blinked lazily up towards her.

"It's an animal. Why name it?"

"I bet you named your ugly, scary mongoose dragon."

"How else would we keep track of their breeding lines?" Azula asked. She rolled the bearded cat over and tickled its belly. She wondered if Katara knew the name of her mount in the royal stables in Capital City, likely fertilizing quite a few clutches and bringing coin to her coffers. She hoped not; a twelve year old had no business naming a prestigious mount with a lifespan of thirty years.

Katara rescued the growling kitten and snuggled it to her chest. She kissed its head, and Azula couldn't temper her laugh as she watched its inquisitive head poke out from under Katara's chin. It looked like its pride had been stepped on...at least until its gaze focused on Katara's hair loop. Soon after, the little beast was dropped to the sand.

"What about tonk-kara?" Katara asked darkly as she finger-combed the hair that had been pulled loose from her loop by kitten claws.

Tonk-kara, little devil. Azula liked it. "Rather fitting. I would have thought you'd prefer a cuter name." When her words garnered no verbal response, she glanced over to see Katara gaping at her. "What?"

"You know what that means?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

"You know the old Water Tribe language? Some Water Tribe people don't even know it."

Azula raised her eyebrows. "Why wouldn't I?" She reiterated, "I am Princess; my lessons included all the significant languages of the peoples of this world. Of course everyone knows the universal language now, but it wouldn't do for me to be unable to understand the old languages of each country." She left out that her education was to ensure she would understand any war communications sent in the old languages.

Katara cocked her head; her expression softened into a smile. "I learn something new about you every day."

"I am a deep and interesting person," Azula muttered, lying back down. The cat pounced on her foot, and she pushed it away gently. Katara giggled and mirrored Azula. They enjoyed the sunlight in silence. Finally, Azula said, "It's been four months."

"Shooing me off?" Katara asked her lightly. From the sound of her groan and sigh, she'd just stretched.

Azula didn't like to talk about the Avatar. Katara still obviously cared about him, as disgusting as it was. The thought of them together… It was hard to reconcile someone she'd come to respect…and like, with someone she had no respect for. Her heart began to beat harder as she asked the question that had gnawed at her for several weeks. "How long is this break you plan to take from the Avatar?"

"Probably permanent."

Azula opened her eyes, blinking past the shining brightness of the sun. She sat up slowly. "You don't love him?"

"I do, but it's not…romantic." Katara winced. "I'm not sure if that makes it better or worse. What do you think I should do?"

Azula's mouth opened and closed soundlessly before she managed a reply. "You're asking me for advice on what to do with your boyfriend who is the Avatar and did the most despicable thing that can be done to any bender to my father?" Not her father, damn it. And someone who coveted Katara's time… If Katara returned to the Avatar, she would no longer be here with Azula. That was completely unacceptable.

"First of all, he's not my boyfriend anymore. And yes, I am asking you."

Azula lowered herself back onto her towel, closing her eyes and watching the shifting redness of her eyelids. She told herself that her next words were from truth and not selfishness. "Tell him the truth."

"If I like someone else, what should I do?"

Who? Why did that make her so angry to think of? "Try it out."

"You really think so?"

"How else can you be sure the Avatar isn't right for you? If you can find what you couldn't with him with someone else, then you know."

Katara shifted, and Azula opened her eyes to see her hugging her knees. "I have a little more respect for Aang now. It's scary thinking about telling someone you like them. He did it several times."

"Desperation shouldn't be confused with bravery."

Katara hit Azula's arm, but her smile was soft. "I guess if I'm desperate, I'll know it's serious." She laughed and spoke almost to herself. "I guess it's not a big surprise. I've always been attracted to the broody tortured types."

Azula wanted to ask 'who' but the words died in her throat. She didn't want to know, didn't want to think of what she might do if she knew. She hoped… She hoped despite herself. Azula nearly betrayed herself when she blurted, "What you must think of me."

"What do you mean?" Katara was obviously surprised by her words.

Of all the things she could say then, the only words Azula needed were: "You've seen me at my worst."

"Your worst? Azula, you're only human. As it turns out, I like Azula the human a lot better than Azula the Princess."

Azula understood her meaning despite herself, and Katara's words eased some of the heaviness in her shoulders. Katara met and held her gaze. There was a long pregnant moment shared between them. She hesitated, then smiled and stood up. "Lunch sounds good. You coming?"

Azula hadn't planned on it, but it was hard to refuse Katara's outstretched hand.

A few days later, Azula walked down to the beach in the late evening. As she'd predicted, Katara was already there. She forged past her own irritating shyness and asked, "What is it about the full moon?"

Katara turned from her dance with her element. Her silk robe was wet, and her hair was damp. She looked sleek and powerful in the moonlight. Azula stared for a moment. In this light, Katara was sensual too.

"I feel it more, the water." Katara laughed almost wildly. "I feel it in you too."

A shiver skittered down her spine; Azula was caught off guard by her own sudden intimidation. She spoke before she could think better of it. "I'm here."

Katara smiled, and the salt water rained down on them both as she released it from her hold. "Yes, you are. Come with me." She reached out and took Azula's hand, and she pulled Azula into the sea.

Azula had once swum at night when she was little, and she'd been scared by the visibly endless inky blackness of the waves that crested silently over her head. It was blindness and utter loss of control. She was uneasy now even with Katara's strong hand anchoring her.

They staggered against the breakers and finally pushed into the calm rolls of the ocean. Katara was only a black silhouette against the reflection of the moon. She raised her hand and pointed out to sea. Azula looked past her own fear.

As they were swept up to the peak of one big roller, she saw something beautiful: a wide bright pathway across the waves towards the full moon. Its perfection was only marred by the fluidity of its borders, ripples that lent it a pattern of liquid silver.

Katara's grip on her hand tightened, and they were buoyed up to the surface to stand on the water. It was chilly on her feet as it solidified, but Katara swept the water out of their shoes before they could freeze to her path of ice. They walked together along that path of moonlight. Their heavy silence was only broken by the gentle crackling of the ice bridge Katara extended beneath their feet.

Katara squeezed her hand. "Do you think we'll ever reach it?"

Azula thought of an old parable about a man trying to touch the sun and surprised herself by laughing. "Even if a man flies as high as the dragon, he'll never reach the sun. But it's a worthy venture."

"Why?"

Azula pondered it. "To mark each step towards infinity."

Katara cocked her head, watching Azula. Her eyes were bright in the moonlight. The shadow of her mouth curved into a smile. She was beautiful. "You really are a gentle spirit."

Azula couldn't scoff in denial or form a snide reply. She couldn't do anything but stand there and shiver in anticipation as Katara cupped her cheek and kissed her. Katara's lips were full, her breath sweet, and Azula's mouth tingled from just the soft touch. She was startled by her own gasp.

Katara drew back. "How close have you been?"

"What?" Azula asked, her mind foggy. She couldn't quite believe it. She hadn't dared to hope for this, and it had happened anyway. Katara had chosen her.

"How close have you been?"

The laugh that bubbled up from her belly was almost wild with happiness. "Kiss me again and I'll tell you."

Katara did just that.

-TBC-

This is the last chapter of book one, with a short epilogue to follow.