Day Eleven: Jealousy and Love.
The following days after Hephaestion's return were a bit confusing; the brunette had to get used to doing some things the rest of the companions had been doing for the last year and he had no idea about it. Some of the companions were truly happy to see him recovered and back but it was not the general and unanimous feeling, there was specially another blued-eyed boy who was not happy at all.
Cassander thought he had got rid of the annoying Hephaestion but it seemed as if the brunette had more lives than a cat. Not only was he back, healthy and fully recovered, he was even more handsome and looking like a young Patroclus in his entire splendor. He had seen the looks between the prince and the brunette and he had unfortunately realized that their close relationship had not suffered at all, in spite of having been separated for such a long period of time. Cassander thought that the long separation would have cooled the incipient desire and lust between them; Cassander refused to see it as love, but it seemed as if not only it had survived but also grown stronger. Hephaestion looked also more confident about himself, moving around full of grace and peace. He would have to think something to break the bond between them if he wanted to be Alexander's eromenos or, at least, a friend with benefits. That was one of the many things his father had forced him to get from the prince, as a way to get more power within the closest circle of the future king. That did not bother Cassander at all, Alexander was quite good looking and he had already experienced with boys and girls, even though the latter had been his favourite. What bothered him the most was that he would never have what those two already had, that feeling of easiness in each other's presence, the exchange of looks that spoke louder than any words, the communion of their souls, pure and requited, and all that relationship had been forged without including the carnal aspect. He felt jealous of them and having his nemesis back would just make his work more difficult. He would have to think about something to chase the brunette again before they claimed each other and all his hard work, during the last year, got lost.
So he subtlety started to meddle with the moments he knew they liked to spend alone, far from the rest of the companions, and doing those things that only they enjoyed, such as reading to each other from that old scroll that the boring Homer had written about the war of Troy and the description of that "sick" relationship between Achilles and Patroclus, the heroes those two loved so deeply and they wanted to emulate.
At first, blonde and brunette had tolerated Cassander's invasion but they had lately developed the ability of avoiding him and that had made him feel angrier than before. He was always searching for them when he saw them disappear together but they were too fast for him to find out where their hideouts were. He finally decided that he was going to beat Hephaestion in another way but he would stop for a while so they would believe that he had stopped in his mission but what he really wanted was for them to become confident and careless so he would attack him in full force.
Hephaestion, after the first days feeling a bit uncomfortable, got into the rhythm again and, as usual, he stood out from the rest quickly, only followed by Alexander and Ptolemy. Aristotle was so happy to have him back because Hephaestion, beside Alexander, had always been the one to challenge him with his answer and questions.
Cleitus, who had been sent to Mieza for an inspection on behalf of King Philip, saw the young brunette as soon as he dismounted. The boy was feeding a beautiful dark chocolate-coated mare and the horse had been nipping gently at Hephaestion's nape. The carefree laugh of the boy made the black warrior feel happy but when that same boy took off his chiton to dry his sweated body, that laugh turned into a low moan. Cleitus saw with delight how well the boy had grown up in the past year, how his body was showing muscles in all the right places and how his natural beauty had been more defined. Lusty images filled the warrior's mind and his strong body felt the awakening of his nether region as if all the blood in his body was heading south. He cleared his throat and that sound made Hephaestion turned round. The naïve teen saw the man who had been his trainer two years before and, without hesitation, he began running towards him and hugged him tightly. Cleitus enveloped the strong but still slender frame between his arms and felt his manhood grow again. He ended the hug before the boy realized what was happening and outstretching his arms, he looked at him and smiled.
"You have grown a lot, brat" Cleitus said, slapping his shoulders gently.
"Yes, I did. I practised the exercises you taught me everyday during my recovery" Hephaestion answered proudly.
"I know, I can see the results clearly in front of my eyes" Cleitus said, releasing the boy.
"What are you doing here, Cleitus?" the boy asked curiously.
"News arrived at the palace that a new male beauty had come back to Mieza and I had to come and see if that was true and I can assure that they were saying the truth" Cleitus said smiling.
Hephaestion remained in silence, not knowing what to answer at first because he had not fully understood the hidden meaning behind the General's words but, as soon as they sipped into his mind, he blushed so deeply that Cleitus thought that the boy's cheeks were about to explode. He looked down to the dirt on his boots and was about to say something when heavy running footsteps could be heard.
"Cleitus, you are here!" an excited Alexander greeted his father's lover.
"Yes I am, my little prince" the man said mocking the blond in front of him.
"Hey, I am not small anymore" Alexander replied angrily, especially because his Hephaestion was there.
"Alright alright, my boy, you have also grown but here the pretty Hephaestion had won you" Cleitus said, throwing a lusty look towards the brunette, who blushed immediately under the scrutiny of those black eyes.
"Yes, my Phai is good looking but so much more intelligent than anyone here, even master Aristotle is amazed at his intelligence" Alexander said with words full of pride for his friend.
"You are so naïve, my boy, but I could appreciate more his body than his mind" Cleitus replied laughing loudly.
Alexander looked at Hephaestion, whose eyes were still down casted, and he felt a rush of anger travelling along his body. He could not understand why Cleitus was being so rude, especially because he was making feel Hephaestion uncomfortable with his lusty remarks about his appearance. Suddenly, he stepped in front of the black warrior and looking at him defiantly, he said:
"I think you should apologize to Hephaestion"
"Why should I do that, my prince?" the warrior asked, wondering what was bothering the short blonde.
"Because you have just disrespected him" Alexander said angrily but he could see Hephaestion's eyes wide open as two coins. He could also see fear in them.
"It is alright, Alexander, Cleitus did not mean to say those things, he was just making a joke" Hephaestion intervened, being afraid of his blonde friend's reaction.
"So you need a beauty boy to fight your battles for you, princeling" Cleitus said, laughing at Alexander and insulting Hephaestion again without realizing.
Alexander threw himself against the broad and strong chest and started to hit him with his fists while calling him names and demanding him for an apology to his Phai.
Cleitus grabbed Alexander's both wrists with only one of his calloused hands and he finally understood what was going on. He had listened again to that tiny word that seemed to mean the world to Alexander, that "my" showed his possessiveness but also his lack of confidence, as if Cleitus could be the one to steal Hephaestion from his side, now that he had recently recovered him.
"Stop Alexander, don't fight me" Cleitus asked, releasing the boy's wrist which he immediately started to caress to soothe the pain.
"So stop behaving so stupidly, you are a grown up man and my father's lover; Hephaestion is my friend and …" he hesitated.
"And what else?" Cleitus asked smiling because he did now see what kind of relationship the prince was hoping to have with his brunette.
"Nothing else" Alexander said, blushing deeply and running away from him.
Hephaestion looked at him with serious eyes and without uttering a single word, he ran after Alexander. He found him hidden behind a thick tree that had fallen during the last strong storm. His back was leaning against the rough bark of the trunk and his head was resting onto his bent knees while his arms hugged his short but muscled legs. Hephaestion looked at him and realized that his face was reddish; the young prince was feeling embarrassed and he would not do anything to embarrass him more than he was. He sat by his side and he patiently waited until Alexander was ready to speak; the waiting also gave him enough time to think over all what had happened and the strange reaction on Alexander's side. He had never seen that possessive side of Alexander and he could not deny he had felt flattered by it, because he did not know how long he would be able to hide his newly born love. The last months since his return had made him see how that admiration he had felt by Alexander had turned into something deeper. However, Hephaestion was also conscious that he was just one companion more; the prince and future king would need someone stronger than him to bear the weight of the empire he was going to create and, more than anything, he would need to get married to have an heir to follow him in the reign. That was why he had immediately abandoned any dreams of them being together but Alexander's recent words had let him have those dreams back but he was not going to mention the incident unless the prince did it first.
The sun was setting and the evening was turning a bit chilly; Hephaestion had nothing to cover with so a succession of tiny shivers travelled along his long frame. Alexander saw that and, without saying a word, he moved closer to the brunette and passed an arm over his shoulder and brought him nearer to his body, sharing his body heat. Alexander was like a walking furnace, his skin was always warm and he did not suffer from cold as Hephaestion did. At the contact with the heated skin, Hephaestion shivered harder so Alexander turned round and made Hephaestion rest his back onto his chest and threw a short cloak over them. Hephaestion made himself more comfortable against his friend's body, sighed lowly and let sleep take him.
An hour or so later, Alexander opened his eyes and he found that Hephaestion was still cocooned between his arms and he felt his heart swell up with the purest love he had ever felt for another person. If only his Phai could love him as he loved him …. A whispered "I do" left Hephaestion's lips and in that moment Alexander realized that he had made that question aloud and that he had finally got the answer he had been looking for in the last past months. Hephaestion, who was truly embarrassed, hid his face against Alexander's neck, a reversed role in this incipient relationship, and waited until he was ready to face his friend.
Alexander, who was always a bit more impatient, lifted Hephaestion's head by gently pushing it upwards, with his forefinger under his chin, and gasped at the beautifully image of his Phai. The boy was stunningly handsome, his eyes, two pools of heaven, were twinkling as two little stars and those lips, that looked so soft and inviting, were a total temptation.
"May I?" Alexander asked in a whisper.
Hephaestion simply nodded and so Alexander leaned over and set the purest kiss onto those so kissable lips. The prince moved his head backwards to test his friend's reaction but he found that Hephaestion had his eyes still closed but he had an expression of pure bliss in his handsome face. Thirty seconds later, he opened his cyan eyes and stared at Alexander with so much love in them that the blonde thought he could die there just of pure happiness.
Hephaestion lifted his hand, caressed the prince's thin but fully lips with his thumb, from one corner to the other, back and forward, until he leaned over, and took them in another kiss, a bit more ardent, more lingering …
Alexander let a low moan escaped from his mouth and tightened the embrace around his friend's slender frame, bringing him closer as if he wanted to fuse both bodies into only one. The kiss and the hug ended when oxygen was a vital need and both boys remained in each other's arms for a long time until the evening turned even colder and their rumbling stomachs made them go back to the chambers.
Every single person in the dining room stopped eating to look at the newcomers, who immediately washed their hands in a basin by the table and sat to share the evening meal with the rest of the companions. Cleitus looked at them seriously, Cassander threw them a dirty angry look that made both boys shiver and Aristotle was about to admonish them for their lateness but when he saw the expression of pure happiness and discovery in their young faces, he just shocked his head and went on eating; he would summon them later to speak to them. The conversation between the diners started again and some of the eldest companions threw curious but encouraging looks towards them, letting them know, in their subtle way, that they had realized what was going on. Hephaestion caught Ptolemy's naughty look and he immediately blushed while Alexander smiled back at Perdicas's knowing look. Both blondes had been lovers for the last two years and Alexander had always wondered if he would be able to find a person who loved him for who he was and not for what he was going to become in the future. He could now say that he had found the perfect partner of all, and even though they were still too young, he knew that he would be able to count with Hephaestion's presence by his side for the rest of his life.
Someone cleared his throat loudly so Aristotle lifted her head from his plate and looked around the table to see who had something to say. He was not surprised to know that the one with a problem was the ever-problematic Cassander and the old teacher already knew what, or better who, he was going to throw his venom over.
"Yes Cassander?" the teacher asked, knowing well that he could not ignore the boy.
"Aren't you going to tell anything, Master?" Cassander asked and with his question brought the attention to his person.
"What about, Cassander?" the man asked again, trying to delay the confrontation while they were still eating.
"They arrived late for dinner and you said nothing, aren't we all equal here?" the brunette asked, sending daggers towards the other brunette.
"Yes, but Alexander still keeps his royal status, even if he does not like being reminded of it" Aristotle replied while he started to cut an apple in halves.
"Alright, but what about Hephaestion? He is just the mere child of one General" Cassander said, exuding more venom with every word he spoke.
"Watch your mouth, brat, General Amyntoros is not just a mere General, he is one of the best warriors, diplomats and strategists this kingdom has" Cleitus said, defending his first commander and a man who he had always looked up to.
"I assumed as both boys arrived together, I could talk to them later if that does not offend your sensibility" the teacher said while putting a piece of the cut apple inside his mouth.
"But I thought we were all equal here, I will have to talk to my father because he told me that …" but the poisonous brunette was immediately cut in the middle of his ranting.
"You'd better be quiet and learn to fight your own battles, it is high time you stop hiding behind his chiton and act as a grown up boy" Cleitus said while standing up and towering the rest of the diners.
Cassander was sensible enough to remain in silence but poor Hephaestion felt so badly that he stopped eating, there was no way he could swallow anything at that moment. Alexander looked at him and got serious too, he did not like the way Cassander had tried to muck up Hephaestion but he would surely have words with the boy later. The dinner ended with all of the companions in silence and as soon as they were allowed, Hephaestion went to his chamber and locked the door behind him. He had never felt more embarrassed in his life than today and he did not know how he was going to face his father if he got kicked out.
Alexander did not wait for Aristotle to call him, he went directly to his master's room to tell him what had happened, from the very beginning. He told him about Cleitus's words about Hephaestion's beauty, how he got jealous about that and he had run away. He also added that Hephaestion had come looking for him and had also waited until he was ready to talk about it. The blonde teen finally confessed the two kisses they had shared and how happy they both felt knowing that their love was requited. Aristotle listened to his young student carefully, weighing every single word of the explanation. Aristotle took some minutes to evaluate the whole situation when the boy finally ended his explanation. They had not acted recklessly but impulsively, they had not harm anyone and he could not reprimand them for falling in love and trying to express it the best way they could. He only wished they did not rush things between them because if that only resulted to be a pure infatuation, they would both suffer and then the situation between them could turn to be difficult and annoying. He secretly believed that they had been born one to complete the other but he would not say anything to influence them, however he promised himself that he would do up to the impossible to help them in the exploration of their new situation.
Aristotle also thought about the intrigues on Cassander's part. He knew, by first hand, that the brunette and his father Antipater had a secret agenda as regards Alexander and they would not allow anyone to mess up with their plans of getting more power by forcing a relationship between Cassander and the crown prince.
Alexander waited patiently this time for his master's advice but the old man was taking too long. He moved nervously on the chair and was about to leave the chamber when the old teacher opened his mouth and said:
"I would not question the reasons that took you two to act as you did but there is one thing in which Cassander is right, your father has let clearly known that you were all equal here and that you all would get the same rewards and punishments. Only your royal status can exclude you of this rule but Hephaestion is not included in that exception so he would be reprimanded for tonight's act" the old man said with pity in his voice.
"But I dragged him with me" Alexander tried to excuse his friend.
"Yes but he knew the rules and, in spite of that, he did not obey them" Aristotle said, trying to teach Alexander that everyone is the forger of their own destiny.
"What will you do?" Alexander asked, knowing that his master was right.
"I will take note of his first rule violation and suspend him for a whole day, in which he would reflect on his actions and how he would mend his mistake" Aristotle said.
"Can I tell him what his punishment is?" Alexander asked, looking for an excuse to go and visit his friend.
"I am sorry but you can't, it is my duty as your teacher and your advisor. If I were you, I would not visit him today, give him so time to think, but I can give him a message if you want" the old man said, looking at the painful expression in those two coloured eyes.
"I will write something and bring it back to you" the boy said and ran towards his chamber.
Nobody except Aristotle and Hephaestion knew what they talked for more than two hours inside the brunette's room and not even the subtle threats of an angry Cassander could make the master tell him about it. When the conversation was over, Aristotle handed Hephaestion the note from Alexander's and the boy waited until he was alone to open it.
"Dear Phai, just a quick note to let you know how sorry I am for bringing such a hard punishment on you and I would understand if you take your friendship from me … Yours, Alexander"
Hephaestion felt his heart freeze because he had caused Alexander to doubt about his real feelings for him and he could see that his friend was in pain due to his shacking handwriting. He decided that he would risk being punished again but he needed to see Alexander in that moment. On his way there, he stopped at Aristotle's chamber and after knocking softly on the door, he let himself in. The old teacher lifted his eyes from an old scroll and looked at the boy, who quickly told him that he was going to visit Alexander and that he would accept any punishment he considered fair. Aristotle smiled and dismissed the boy with a waving movement of his wrinkled hand.
Hephaestion ran towards his friend's chamber and pushing the thick and heavy door, he entered without making so much noise. Alexander was resting onto his back on the thin cot, with one of his arms over his eyes as if he wanted to hide from the world. He must have been truly deep in his thoughts because he did not listen to Hephaestion entering until the brunette sat on the bed next to him. Alexander sat on the cot abruptly and asked with worry in his voice:
"Are you alright? Are you feeling unwell?"
"I am fine; I just wanted to know how you were" he said blushing.
"I am better for having you here" Alexander said, caressing the boy's arm.
"I really like you, Alexander, please do not doubt about my feelings for you" the brunette pleaded.
"I will not but I just wanted to give you an easy way out" he confessed, a bit embarrassed.
"I don't need it, I am not someone who runs away as soon as the first problem arises" Hephaestion said firmly.
"I am sorry but I really did not know what to do" Alexander said, down casting his eyes.
"Let me stay here with you tonight" Hephaestion asked gently but in fact he wanted to reassure his friend.
"Always" and scooting over, he made space so the brunette could lie next to him.
Morpheus looked at the two boys, holding each other firmly but tenderly at the same time, and granted them a peaceful rest. He was sure they would need it to tolerate the storm to come.