A/N: LONGEST CHAPTER EVER. Sorry, everyone. I have trouble reading 5000+ word chapters, so writing one is poor form.
Story so far: Patience exhausted, Kanji tried to play the hero and screwed it all up. Souji, true to form, bailed him out (but may or may not have done the same for Naoto)
In this part: Robots are made of plastic, Chie kicks off heads, Naoto's a jerk - and the team find out a little secret.
September 23rd 2011
"So this is it, huh?" Chie tipped back her head, watching the blinking lights on the roof of the metal bunker. "Not what I expected. I figured it'd be like an old detective movie, not a military base."
"Well, that's the point," Yukiko said. "These worlds, they're always something the owner's kept hidden."
Yosuke smirked. "Guess Naoto's deep, dark secret is that he wants to be a Featherman Ranger."
The conversation continued, but Kanji was too caught up to listen. He had the impression Souji still hadn't forgiven him. Rise definitely hadn't. Worse, he kept coming back to last night's dream. He could remember every detail, from the feel of the air outside, to the exact color of the sky, to the way the body had been twisted as if-
He shook his head. It hadn't happened. Just his mind working overtime, making him unsettled - and it didn't help that Souji's decision to tackle the base had come out of nowhere. They were supposed to head back to Void Quest today. Kanji wasn't complaining, though, not if it finally meant they'd get to Naoto. It just felt really weird - and the dream had felt more real than any other he'd had.
"Kanji, you're on the first team." Souji didn't turn to look at him. "You too, Chie, and Yukiko."
"C'mon, Souji," Yosuke whined. "You benched me for most of Kubo's. When do I get a shot?"
Usually, Souji would've rolled his eyes and told Yosuke to stop fussing; maybe even made light of it. Instead, he walked toward the entrance to the base and stepped through the portal without a word. Chie and Yukiko followed close behind.
Kanji couldn't even figure out why Souji had picked him after the stupid shit he'd pulled. It'd seemed so right at the time - he'd take everyone in, and they'd go find Naoto, kick his Shadow's ass and bring him back, because that was how it always worked.
At least, if you were Souji Seta. If you were smart.
Kanji glanced back at Rise, and Teddie standing behind her, then followed the others through.
"Whoa." Chie was bent double, hands on her knees. "I'll give Naoto-kun credit. He really doesn't want us here."
"No kidding," Kanji grunted. They'd heard the same thing every time they descended another floor: a metallic voice from somewhere in the walls, like a much louder version of the Junes P.A. system. It'd started out just telling them to leave, but by the fourth flight of stairs it'd decided they needed some help. Straight out of a fight with four Wild Drives and a trio of Mighty Beasts right before that, the whole team was in rough shape.
Souji tilted his head, face tinted green by the lighting overhead. "Rise, do we have some breathing space?"
Nothing near you right now, guys. Just another really big door up at the end of the corridor. Locked, like the last one.
"Again?" Kanji's first instinct had been to smash the door to pieces, but like almost everything else in this place it was built of metal and rivets. He'd have either broken his shield - which Daidara had only just fixed up - or shaken his teeth out.
"Like I said, Naoto-kun's trying to keep us out. Remind me to kick him later," Chie added with a growl.
Kanji was about to tell Chie she'd have to join the damn queue when a wave washed over him, heating up his skin and easing the scrapes and bruises. Always reminded him of sitting round a campfire. "Thanks, Yukiko-senpai."
"No problem, Kanji-kun." Yukiko was already casting on Chie, Amaterasu floating semi-transparent behind her. "I wonder if the last door mattered? We still found a way down here."
"Everything has a purpose," Souji pointed out. "At least in these places. Let's check out the door."
They edged closer. Last time the door had started yelling at them when they were just over a meter away; even Souji had flinched.
Again, the voice echoed from the walls, even though there was no visible source. "BEYOND THIS POINT IS CONFIDENTIAL."
Hands on hips, Chie groaned. "Here we go again."
"ENTRY IS FORBIDDEN FOR ORDINARY COMBATANTS AND RESEARCHERS. PLEASE PRESENT YOUR ID."
"Who're you calling ordinary?" Kanji snapped - immediately feeling a little stupid - then growled under his breath. "Same damn thing as last time!"
"No... that 'researchers' part is different. And the last door said it lead to a research area." Souji looked away, gaze fixed on a point somewhere in mid-air. "Rise, did we miss any other paths?"
Just one, Senpai. But all I'm seeing down there is a chest... no other exits.
He shrugged. "Might be something useful. Come on, guys."
They traced back their steps, Rise checking the area for any stray shadows, and made their way down the dead-end walkway. Reaching the chest first, Chie knelt down and lifted the lid. Kanji couldn't see what she pulled out until she turned around, holding a small blue plastic card in her hand. The word RESEARCH was scrawled across it in shaky capitals, in what looked like a little kid's handwriting.
She shook her head and let out a deep sigh. "Man, I never get the good stuff!"
"Wait, Chie - remember that first door? It said it was to the research area, and that card's-"
"Well, duh, Yukiko. I figured that out already. Not just good for kicking things." Chie grimaced, flipping the card between her fingers. "Despite what Hanamura says."
"You sure it's not for the door we were just at?" Kanji really hoped it was, because the thought of fighting back through two floors made shaking out his teeth seem like a great option.
Souji nodded. "Forbidden for researchers, remember?" He heaved his sword to his side. "Looks like we're heading back up."
To Rise's credit, they reached the door with relatively little trouble. She kept them dodging round corners and through empty corridors, only wound up in two very brief battles on the way back.
"ENTRY IS FORBIDDEN FOR ORDINARY COMBATANTS. PLEASE PRESENT YOUR ID."
"Anything behind there, Rise?" Souji asked quietly.
Nope... but I can feel something strong further inside. I think it's one of the special shadows. Be careful, okay?
"Figures," Kanji muttered. Same way it always worked. Midway through the floors, they had to fight a powerful shadow, the first layer of a person's psyche; peel that away and they'd clear the path to Naoto's real Shadow, his true self.
"Let's get this over with." Souji pulled the card from his pocket and swiped it in the reader.
At first, nothing happened. Souji had just lifted his hand to swipe the card a second time when a deep, hollow rumble of turning gears set the floor vibrating beneath their feet - and, with the grinding of metal on metal, the door slid open in two separate sections. Behind, there was just another walkway, identical to the rest. "Don't look much like a research area to me," Kanji said.
Guys, there should be a door up ahead on your left. Don't go in till you're ready to fight. I'm positive the shadow's there.
The four of them moved down the walkway in near silence, passing more Featherman symbols and flashing red lights, and paused outside the door. "Everyone ready?" Souji whispered.
Three nods came in turn. Souji gave them one of his own - then slammed his palm against the button on the wall.
Again, the door shuddered open, only slightly less loudly than the last. Kanji moved in first, shield already raised, the others following close behind - and stopped.
"You're kidding me," he muttered.
"And I thought Rise's was weird," mused Chie.
"Pretty sure I've got a model kit like that," Souji added, eyebrows raised.
The shadow wasn't just a giant red robot. It was a giant red robot that Kanji swore he'd once seen turn into a truck on a television show. It looked like it should be made of plastic and sold in Junes. It was also carrying a giant sword, which it raised high into the air as soon as it noticed the team.
Souji yelled at them all to scatter, Kanji leapt to his left - and felt the whistle of air as the blade missed him by centimeters and crashed into the floor.
No weaknesses, guys, no strengths either. Hammer it!
Kanji called Take-Mikazuchi before he even made it to his feet. "Ziodyne!"
New one. He'd picked it up during training, almost felt his skin buzz the first time he used it. The bolt - sharper and brighter - crashed into the robot, knocking it back. Kanji would've assumed that electricity would mess a machine up bad, but nothing ever made sense inside the television. Maybe the thing really was made of plastic.
Chie ran forward from behind him, jumped, then launched into a kick that should've snapped her leg in half. Instead she smashed a hole clean through the robot's armored chest. Souji must've powered her up.
Kanji-kun, this...uh, robot thing, it uses charges. Senpai's working support. We're counting on you and Chie-senpai to smack it down, okay?
It was the first time Rise had spoken to him in nearly a week. "Gotcha," Kanji answered, raising his shield for another attack.
This time, he didn't summon. Big mistake. The robot swiped its sword in a wide arc, caught him with the flat of the blade - about all he had to be grateful for - and hurled him into the wall.
He cursed out loud when he hit the ground, mouth watering with pain. A dull, cold throb gripped the back of his calf as he tried to stand, but he still threw himself into a half-stumble back towards the robot. Halfway there he smashed his card and called for Take-Mikazuchi, feeling warm heat course through his leg at the same time.
Across the room, Yukiko shot him a smile. Kanji grinned back - and fired off another Ziodyne. His reward was a metallic shriek, layered with the spluttering crackle of electricity over metal, as the robot almost toppled backward.
Chie whooped, punching the air. "Good one, Kanji!"
Now angry, or scared, or whatever the hell shadows felt, the robot lashed out blindly. Yukiko was fast enough to jump back. Souji wasn't. Yatagarasu took the worst of the hit - Senpai would be in two separate chunks otherwise - but he still fell hard, blood spraying over the metal floor.
Souji-senpai's down! And the shadow's powering up!
The robot paused, arms and legs beginning to glow. Didn't move even when Chie smashed a Black Spot directly against its head. Take-Mikazuchi and Suzuka Gongen were both bruisers, with no way to drain the charge; the best option Kanji had was to block. The right thing to do, though, was to run over and take the hit for Yukiko. She was right next to Souji on the floor, Amaterasu at her side.
But what Kanji wanted to do - just for a instant, and even though it was Yukiko - was let her take it and finish the shadow himself. Save time, go get Naoto.
...Screw that. Kanji might've been an idiot, but he wasn't an asshole. He sprinted towards Souji, summoning as he ran - leaving Take-Mikazuchi to drive a fist straight into the robot's abdomen just before it slashed down its sword. At the same time, Kanji skidded in front of Yukiko, already feeling a burst of fear, then cursed under his breath and thrust his shield over his head.
The blade almost cleaved it in two - but it held.
Souji was back on his feet, a different Persona floating behind him. Kanji couldn't remember the name. Whatever it was called, it had a pumpkin for a head. Man, Senpai had some really stupid-looking Personas.
Almost there, guys. Hit it with everything you have!
"Chie, Kanji, push for another attack! Yukiko, Agidyne!" Souji yelled. "Masukukaja!"
Limbs instantly lighter, Kanji hurtled towards the shadow, firing off two Ziodynes in quick succession. The first deflected off the robot's sword - but the second slammed directly into the dent Chie had left in its chest.
It shrieked again, a high-pitched buzzing squeal. The sound cut off instantly when Chie almost flew across the room in a flying kick, legs glowing with a power charge, and caught the robot in the neck. Its head rocked sideways - snapped wires and piping visible underneath - and, with a burst of static and a crunch of metal, tore off and crashed to the ground.
Kanji blinked. "Holy crap, Chie-senpai."
As she picked herself up from the floor, Chie gave him a sheepish smile. "Wow. Didn't expect that one to work."
"I know Naoto's made things difficult," Souji said, "but try not to do that to him."
Looking at the wreckage of the robot, Kanji almost felt bad; like he'd just smashed up a kid's toy. Stupid, given the thing had tried to kill him. He wandered over to Yukiko, who was kneeling by the robot's head and holding a red card, same size as the blue one with the same shaky handwriting. LEADER. Underneath was another falcon crest and what looked like a crudely-drawn picture of Souji.
"Why's he on there?" Kanji muttered - thankfully under his breath, since Souji chose that moment to walk up behind him.
"Enough for today, guys," he said. "We'll finish up tomorrow."
"Senpai, you serious? We're close!" Kanji shook his head fiercely. "You send back Chie-senpai and Yukiko-senpai, pull up Teddie and Yosuke, we'll do this!"
Chie made an indignant noise in her throat. "Tatsumi, are you saying you can handle more than me? Because-"
"We're leaving," Souji said firmly. "I'm drained too, and Kanji, don't pretend you're not tired. We'll be back tomorrow, I promise. You'll be on the team."
Frustration and impatience both reared up again - and somewhere at the back of his mind, Kanji could still see a body hanging from the telephone wires. But he also remembered Souji asking for his trust.
He swallowed, throat tight. "Okay, Senpai. You better stick to that."
Souji looked him in the eye. "No delays. Not this time."
September 24th 2011
"Can't believe he benched me." Kanji aimed another kick at the studio lot floor. "What a load of crap."
Yosuke was already lying down with his arms spread out behind his head. He'd taken up the position soon as they'd entered the television; it almost matched the bodies outlined beneath him. "Try being me, Kanji. Jiraiya's probably forgotten who I am." He sighed. "I'll call the big guy up and he'll smack my head off."
Kanji hesitated. "Uh... did Senpai leave you here... is it because of what I did? Goin' in without him?"
"Nah. He's been doing this ever since we got Rise. Wish I knew why."
"You're already pretty strong, Yosuke-senpai." Even when concentrating on the team, Rise couldn't stand to be left out of a conversation. "Souji-senpai probably wants to get everyone up to speed."
"Well... just in case it is down to me... sorry, man." Saying it didn't change anything, but Kanji felt a little better. "You too, Rise."
After a few seconds silence, Rise nodded, Himiko's visor following the motion. "No worries, Kanji. You didn't force me into it, you know?"
Yosuke just shrugged. "Both of you wanted to help Naoto, I wanted Rise not to kill me. Guess we all had our reasons."
The conversation died out after that. Kanji didn't know how to restart it, Rise was scanning, and Yosuke seemed vaguely miserable. Hours seemed to pass before Rise finally spoke.
"Okay, they're on their way back. Senpai says you both need to get ready. He wants you on the team to fight Naoto's Shadow."
Souji had remembered. Kanji couldn't hide his grin. "Awesome!"
Yosuke, meanwhile, just stared at Rise in disbelief. "Me? Are you sure your ears are working?"
"Yes, Yosuke-senpai." Himiko's visor vanished, and Rise shot him a glare. "Now, get up off the floor."
"Naoto-kun's definitely inside, guys." Rise stood with them this time, Himiko floating behind her in the corridor. "But there's something different. I think his Shadow's there too."
"Figures." Souji turned to the team. "Get ready. Going by past example, we'll have to fight it."
"You know, I wish humans would just learn to accept themselves," Teddie lamented, with a heavy sigh.
Yosuke rolled his eyes. "Yeah, because we didn't fight a creepy giant bear a few months ago."
"We gonna stand out here and talk?" Kanji snapped. "C'mon, let's get this over with!"
Souji gave a quick nod, then slammed his hand against the door control. It rumbled open, the two sections sliding apart.
The team ran inside - and out onto a wide metal platform, same green light overhead. The area around them was crammed full of machines and monitors, each one buzzing or beeping or rattling, but the opposite side of the chamber looked like an operating theatre. Bright white floodlights overhead, a buzzsaw and drill hanging either side of a long steel table, all stained with blood - and, standing in front, two Naotos.
Kanji stopped short, Chie almost slamming into his back. "Naoto!"
The Naotos looked to be in the middle of an argument - good luck with that, Kanji thought - but on hearing his name, the nearest one turned around. His expression was perfectly blank. "It's about time you arrived," he said flatly. "Dealing with this child has been quite a pain."
Not a scrap of gratitude. Figured, but at least he sounded okay.
The other Naoto looked up too, startled, and grabbed the first one's arm. He wore a lab-coat far too big for his frame, the sleeves completely covering his hands, and his eyes were bright yellow. Naoto's Shadow, then. And he was sobbing. "No! No, no, don't go!"
Naoto stared at the floor, not even trying to pull away; looking closely, Kanji noticed his legs trembling. "This is useless. I need to go back now."
The Shadow's shoulders shook, tears streaming down his face and soaking into the fabric of his coat. "Why? Why are you leaving me here? Why am I always left alone?"
Though Naoto's lips moved, Kanji was too far away to hear what he said. Whatever it was, it only made the Shadow sob harder. "It's s-so lonely, I don't wanna be alone!"
In response, Naoto just rolled his eyes.
Kanji didn't know what was worse: the fact that he almost felt more sorry for the Shadow than for Naoto, or the fact that the Shadow was Naoto, that this was what went on inside the kid's head. His stomach knotted, a ball of lead weighing him down.
Yukiko murmured something beside him and moved to step forward, halted by Chie's arm around her waist. "Wait, Yukiko. We gotta let this play out, remember?"
"I see you still wear the same face as me," Naoto said, louder now, tone not quite level. "But the similarities end there. The difference between me and you is-"
"Differences? Why delude yourself? I am you." The Shadow switched voices seamlessly, into the same deep, exaggerated tone he'd used on the Midnight Channel. He turned to the team, casting one sleeve toward himself. "These childish gestures are no mere affectation - they're the truth!"
For a moment, Naoto looked horrified. He grabbed the Shadow's arm and pulled him back, hissing something under his breath.
"What?" the Shadow sneered. "The fools all say it, don't they? 'You're only a child,' 'Keep out of our business, kid' - doesn't that sound familiar?"
"That, that has nothing to do-"
"But it's the key to everything, isn't it? No matter how many cases you spend hours cogitating over, no matter how many crimes you solve, you're a child in their eyes! It's only your brain they're interested in, the grey matter locked up in that skull." The Shadow swung an arm towards the team. "Just like them."
Naoto's eyes followed the gesture - and Kanji was terrified he'd be crying, just like his Shadow had. Seeing the same blank stare was somehow much worse.
He lurched forward. "Naoto, that ain't true, don't-"
"Kanji." Souji's hand was on his shoulder. "We didn't interrupt yours either, remember? We can't."
Dammit. It'd been the same with Rise's, and Kubo's. Kanji straightened his back, his muscles taut.
"An impeccable performance, Naoto-kun. You've demonstrated how very, very clever you are, and how utterly wrong these children were. I'm sure they're all quite intimidated." The Shadow draped a sleeve over Naoto's shoulder. "What happens now?"
Naoto opened his mouth slightly, as if to respond - then closed it and looked away.
"Oh, but you already know!" the Shadow trilled. "As long as people need your talents, you're an ace detective - but when you're done, out the door you go."
The two of them still faced the team - one sneering, the other staring at the floor. Naoto ducked his head, eyes totally hidden under the brim of his cap, and the Shadow shoved him aside with a snarl. "And yet the outcome surprises you, every single time! Society is two-faced and playing pretend does nothing to deal with that. The real adults will always win - and you, you're just a lonely child!"
Kanji winced.
It didn't make sense. 'Lonely' was someone who wanted friends but didn't know how to find them. It wasn't a kid who acted ice-cold and pushed everyone away. Above all, it wasn't Naoto.
At his side, Yosuke then glanced at him, then Souji, and ran a hand through his hair. "I really hate this part."
Naoto hadn't spoken since the start of the Shadow's rant. He just stood there, looking pale, shoulders slumped, never quite looking at either the team or his Shadow. The latter watched Naoto carefully for a few moments - before his expression changed again, his whole face seeming to shift under the green and white light. He started to cry, his whole body jerking with sobs as he rubbed his sleeves against his eyes.
Kanji felt Rise grab his hand. "I don't want to see this," she murmured. "Kubo was different. I-I don't think we should be-"
"We have to," Chie insisted. "I didn't want to see Yukiko's, or yours, or Kanji's - but you can't accept your Shadow without confronting it. Naoto-kun's no different."
"I-I wanna be a grown-up!" The Shadow choked, voice higher than ever. "I wanna be a big boy right now, then, then they'll see - I'll show them who I am! I...I want a reason for me to stay!"
"That's enough! I can find my own reason for living!"
"Impossible, Naoto-kun. You are but a child." Another seamless shift - and with a tip of his head, the Shadow curled his lips into a sneer. "How can you change that essential truth?"
Naoto's fists balled at his sides. "S-Stop it...!"
"Simply put, you cannot. You idolize the sort of 'strong' and 'cool' men who populate detective fiction, but for all your efforts to emulate them, all your attempts to dissemble, you know full well you're nothing of the sort." The Shadow stepped forward, placing both hands firmly on Naoto's shoulders. "You're a child."
Naoto's hands unfurled from fists and flew to cover his ears. "Don't! Don't you dare call-"
The sentence stopped short. Naoto shot the briefest of glance at the team - then stepped back, dropped his hands, and clamped one firmly against his hip. The same practiced pose Kanji had seen before. It hadn't been convincing even then.
"Endless affectations," the Shadow clucked, scowling. "But there's no avoiding first principles. Admit that you're a child, and admit that there's nothing you can do about it!" He spun towards the operating table, lab-coat twirling around him. "Now then! Our analysis is complete. Let us begin the body alteration procedure!"
Chie sucked in a breath. "Wait, is that what the drill's for?"
"We gotta do something!" hissed Kanji. "Your Shadow ever try to chop you up?"
Across the room, the Shadow was perched on the table and smirking at Naoto. "So strong! So silent! Presumably you have no objections... 'Naoto' Shirogane."
Naoto twisted oddly, like one half of him wanted to do something but the other didn't - and the movement ended in a foot stamped hard against the floor. "Stop it!"
The Shadow just chuckled and rocked back on the table, heels kicking against the side. "'Naoto'... such a cool, manly name! But a name doesn't change the truth. It doesn't let you cross the barrier between the sexes!"
Kanji blinked. Beside him, Souji drew a sharp breath. Naoto, meanwhile, had turned away completely.
Barrier between...?
Nah. No way. He'd just heard that wrong.
The Shadow leaned forward, chin resting on its hand, eyes wide and curious. "Tell me, Naoto-kun...how could you become an ideal man when you were never male to begin with?"
For several moments, nobody moved. Or breathed.
Yosuke was the first to regain the power of speech - sort of. "Wait, what... ? Did he - did I hear that right?"
Kanji, whose brain had seized up completely, didn't fare much better. "H-He's not a guy?"
"I knew it!" Teddie chirped from somewhere behind Souji. "Teddie always knows a- ow, Sensei!"
Still turned away, Naoto pulled off his hat and ran his hand through his disheveled hair. "I won't throw a tantrum," he hissed. "That accomplishes nothing!"
The Shadow's deep, manic laugh echoed through the chamber. "Ah, how often I've heard those words from the adults! 'Throwing a tantrum won't solve anything, Naoto-kun,' and other such bilge!" He jumped down from the table and sauntered over to Naoto. "They made you cry, didn't they?"
Naoto just shivered, gaze fixed firmly at a point on the right wall.
"Yet here you are, mimicking those same men. What exactly are you trying to justify?"
"What... ?" Judging by the shift in stance, if Naoto had been anyone else, Kanji would've expected him to barrel forward and punch his Shadow out cold.
Wait. Her. Maybe?
"It's all right. You needn't suffer anymore." The Shadow's voice was smooth, almost gentle. He trailed a finger under Naoto's chin. "That's why you're undergoing this bodily alteration procedure. That's why you need to be fixed - and then everything will be so much better."
Alteration procedure. Not just turning Naoto into an adult, but turning him - turning her -
Kanji grimaced. Sooner they fought this thing, the better. Smashing it up would be nice and simple.
"I-I don't want..." Naoto edged away, glancing from the Shadow to the team and back again - before shaking his head, then wiping his hand over his face.
"You throw a tantrum, but it fails to change the situation a single bit!" The Shadow tutted sadly. "I can quite understand the feeling." Eyes glowing brighter than ever, he paused, tipped his head, and smirked. "After all, I am you."
Naoto blinked. For a split-second, he looked lost - then shocked, then, finally, furious. "That's not true!"
Guy really did sound like a girl there, Kanji thought, and inwardly kicked himself.
Chie lunged forward. "No, Naoto-kun, don't say it!" This time, she tried to run ahead, but Kanji blocked her with one arm held out straight.
He'd wanted to intervene before, too, swoop in and save Naoto. But save him from what? Finally manning up and facing his problems?
...Manning up. Kanji wanted to laugh, thought it really wasn't funny.
"It's okay," he insisted. Hell, they sat through this same routine every single time. No point dragging it out. "Let the kid spill the whole thing. If not, Naoto's gonna keep hurting. We'll just do our job and kick the Shadow's ass, yeah?"
Hands still curled into fists, Naoto glanced over his shoulder at Kanji, a totally unfamiliar expression on his face.
Her face. Kanji would have to keep that in mind.
He lifted his shield and shot the Shadow a glare. The sole response was another hysterical laugh. "As if you know anything about me! You'll kick my ass, huh? Go ahead and try, you lizard-brained imbecile!"
Fine, the words weren't actually Naoto's. That didn't keep Kanji from feeling a little hurt - something he pushed aside for future deep contemplation when the floor around the Shadow began to turn black. Dark fog rose up from the metal and swirled thickly around the Shadow's legs, spiralling up until even the yellow glow of his eyes disappeared.
Yosuke pushed past, knives raised. "Save the discussion for later!"
Souji's card was already in his hand. "Kanji, Yosuke, up front! Yukiko, with me! The rest of you, behind!"
"Here it comes!" Rise yelled, just before the thick mass of fog burst open.
The blast sent the real Naoto flying as his true Shadow leapt into the air... still looking very much like Naoto. Or half-Naoto, half-robot. One side of its face jet black, the other all metal and wires, wings sprouting from its back and torches firing from its feet. Kanji made a mental note to look for this one in the Junes toy department too as he darted across the room to grab Naoto from the floor.
He - she, whatever - was out cold, hat beside his head. Picking up both it and its owner, Kanji finally realized why the latter looked so odd without it. Almost like a girl.
Save it for later, Tatsumi. He'd already promised himself he'd kick Naoto's ass then too, as payback for this whole stupid stunt. "Keep an eye on him," he told Chie, leaving Naoto with her and running back to the fight.
The Shadow's head whirred as it tracked the team's movements. It raised one arm, leveling its gun at the center of the group - and when it spoke, it was in the same deep voice as before. "Are you sick of yourselves too? We'll soon fix that. Let's begin the special operation!"
"Bring it on, man!" Kanji snapped. "I'll pull you through this!"
At least, he intended to. He just didn't want to hit something that looked so much like Naoto.
Rise's Shadow hadn't resembled her at all. Kubo's had been even weirder; not that Kanji would've minded beating up on him. Would've been awesome stress relief. But Naoto was different, and - caught up in indecision - Kanji missed his cue completely. He should've followed through on Yosuke's first attack, but instead he froze - and the Shadow plunged down and rocketed towards him, one wing clipping him round the head and knocking him to the floor.
His ears were ringing, Souji was yelling, and Rise had just started up too. A stream of fire burst over his head, earning a metallic shriek.
Kanji, get it together! Use elemental attacks!
Take-Mikazuchi was already at his side as he scrambled to his feet. Kanji couldn't remember calling him. "Ziodyne!"
The bolt slammed home, knocking the Shadow off course on another barrel roll towards Souji. Yosuke and Jiraiya followed up with a blast of wind that threw it across the room. The one advantage of its resemblance to Naoto was the similarity in size. Compared to giant robots and pixel monsters, it should've been an easy takedown.
Unfortunately, the Shadow was fast. It crashed into a metal girder, hit the floor, and instantly shot into the air. When it raised its laser pistol, Kanji raised his shield in turn - but instead of the heat of a laser blast, shards of ice hammered against the metal. Somewhere behind him, Yukiko let out a cry of pain.
"Rise, dammit," he hissed. "You never told us it used ice!"
I didn't know! I didn't think it could... but Senpai's got Yukiko, you just worry about hitting it!
That, he could handle. Kanji ran forward and smashed his shield against the Shadow's left side just as Yosuke slashed through its right. Wires and gears crunched together, some falling to the floor.
Buzzing and whirring, the Shadow recoiled. It turned to Kanji - looking far too much like Naoto - and shook its head.
"This will never do," it insisted. "Patients must lie still for me to drill proper holes into-"
Another jet of fire, straight past Kanji's right shoulder and into the Shadow's chest. It jerked back in a squeal of high-pitched static. When it hit the floor, his first instinct was to pull it up.
Stupid. This wasn't Naoto. Nothing like him. Kanji grit his teeth, lifted his shield, and smashed it down against the Shadow's head. Black ichor oozed out from one side, sparks firing out from the other.
Good one, Kanji! Senpai's on debuffs, you and Yosuke-senpai keep smashing it. Yukiko-senpai's got your back.
Kanji nodded, mouth dry. He figured he should hit the Shadow again, but it just kept jerking and twisting against the floor, electricity crackling over its arms and legs. Swallowing hard, he lifted his shield for another attack - and the Shadow shot up and knocked it from his hands. The last thing he remembered after that was the flash of light above his head, just before an energy blast threw him so far back he almost slammed into the door they'd come in by.
Take-Mikazuchi started up a wordless stream of anger that bounced off the inside of his skull. Kanji settled for lying on the floor and trying not to move. He could hear the fight raging behind him: rushing flames, shattering ice, buzzes and crackles and beeps.
Stupid true Shadow. Shouldn't look so much like its owner. Kanji couldn't remember his being like him.
"Kanji! Wake up!"
He'd been out for most of that one, though.
"Tatsumi, you pick yourself up right now!"
Kanji's eyes cracked open. Overhead, Chie blurred in and out of his vision, looking increasingly pissed off each time. "Mm..wasurr?"
She shook him by the shoulders. "C'mon, get up! They need you!"
"Mmmrgg," Kanji managed. He tipped his head sideways and saw Naoto sprawled on the floor to his right, still out cold.
"Oh, for crying... Teddie, get over here," Chie muttered, frowning down at him. "Teddie'll help you. I'll fill your spot. Soon as you feel like getting up and doing something, let me know, okay?"
Kanji let out a grunt he hoped she'd interpret as agreement. Chie frowned again, shook her head, then vanished, leaving him blinking at the ceiling.
Footsteps squeaked to his left. "Kanji! What's... ooh, that doesn't look good. Hold still, 'kay?"
A cool wave washed over Kanji's skin - like plunging into the river in the summer - and his arms and legs stopped being made out of lead. "What... what the hell was that?" he grumbled, trying and failing to sit up.
"Naoto zapped you." Teddie glanced at the limp form beside him. "Well, Naoto's Shadow. I could bear-ly see from here, but you pretty much let it blast you in the face."
At the back of Kanji's mind, Take-Mikazuchi made a noise that roughly translated as 'moron'.
"Looked kinda like enervation," continued Teddie. "Sensei and the others have it under control now. It keeps figuring out what everyone's weak to, though."
"Naoto's smart," Kanji blurted, then rubbed his forehead and hoped Naoto really was still out.
"Sensei's smarter," Teddie chirped. "Hey, let me help you up."
Gripping Teddie's paw, Kanji pulled himself upright. Across the room, he could see the Shadow hanging in the air like a puppet, head bowed, wings sparking. Yosuke was on his ass on the floor, Chie berating him as she tried to pull him up, and Yukiko was still firing off bursts of flame. They had the fight sewn up.
He turned back to Naoto. All the little things put together - the short and slender frame, the eyes Kanji had noticed first time they met, the rumors he'd heard about the kid never changing for gym around other guys - still didn't add up to this.
Who had he been crushing on - a guy or a girl?
"Frickin' idiot," he muttered, grabbing the cap and placing it on Naoto's head.
"Is he - uh, she-" Yosuke paused, frowned, then shook his head. "Is Naoto awake yet?"
"No." Kanji had been watching Naoto the whole time, even before he'd felt well enough to stand. "I dunno why he's-"
"Mmph?" It wasn't eloquent, but it definitely came from Naoto - who twitched slightly, eyelids flickering open. "Where... "
"Naoto-kun! Are you okay?" Yukiko, the closest to him, tried to help Naoto stand. He quickly squirmed away and pulled himself to his feet, squinting at the green light.
Wait. Her, not his, Kanji tried to remind himself, then decided to just roll with it and update his mental pronoun list later.
"I... I remember you all arriving here, and ... " Naoto trailed off, glancing at each of them in turn, then around the room - and when her eyes finally settled on the Shadow, she flinched. "You... you all saw everything."
The Shadow itself just stared. Where Kanji's had been a shrieking harpy even after they'd smacked it down, this one was silent. Naoto walked over, looked it up and down, and let out a soft sigh. "I don't know what you are," she told it quietly, "but I know where you come from."
Yosuke coughed. "Uh.. you can tell me to butt out, Naoto-kun... but... well, why'd you pretend to be a guy?" he asked, yelping when Chie elbowed him in the ribs. "Come on, it's the obvious question!"
Naoto's jaw tightened. "It's... complicated."
"We have time," Souji said evenly. "Plenty, now."
"...Very well. I lost both my parents in an accident when I was very young. My grandfather took me in." Naoto hesitated. "I... had little talent for making friends, so I spent my time reading detective novels in his study.
"I-I remember you looking at them," mumbled Kanji. "At the bookstore."
As Naoto nodded, the Shadow opposite her mimicked the motion. "When I grow up, I'm gonna be an awesome, hard-boiled detective!"
"More or less," Naoto muttered. "My parents were also detectives, making me fifth in the Shirogane line. An inherited occupation can feel stifling, yet I yearned for the day I could follow in their footsteps and become a detective myself." She shook her head. "But I was always alone. I suspect my grandfather felt it was his duty to compensate for that by helping me realize my dream."
"Which is why you've already solved so many cases."
"Exactly, Seta-san. I secretly aided my grandfather with his clients - and before I knew it, people started calling me Junior Detective. At first, I was delighted... but not everyone welcomes my collaboration." She grimaced. "My status as a 'child' has been sufficient to offend many potential colleagues."
Going by experience, Kanji suspected that wasn't the only source of the problem. But if you spent a bunch of time alone, never learning how to deal with people, you couldn't be blamed for behaving like a jerk. At least, not completely.
"Were my youth the only issue," Naoto continued, "this situation would resolve itself with time. Unfortunately, changing from a child to an adult only solves one side of the problem. Changing from a woman to a man... that half is impossible."
"Do you not like being a girl?" Yukiko asked. "Is that why you always dress like a boy?"
Naoto nodded, eyes averted. "My sex doesn't fit my ideal image of a detective. Besides, the police department is a male-orientated society. Give them one 'concrete' reason to look down on me, and nobody would need me anymore."
"You don't know that," Kanji insisted, more brusquely than he'd intended.
Yukiko agreed, more tenatively. "Kanji-kun's right. And you already know that what you really want isn't to become an adult or become a boy, don't you?"
Naoto was quiet for a long time; hand tapping against her side, gaze fixed on the floor. Finally she lifted her head, still looking a little lost - and let out a breath. "You're absolutely right." She turned back to her Shadow and cocked her head, watching as it again mirrored her movement.
"I'm sorry," she began. "I kept ignoring you, pretending you didn't exist. But you are me, and I am you. What I should yearn for-" Naoto hesitated, one hand rubbing her neck. "No. What I must strive for, isn't to become a man. I must accept myself for who I really am."
Before she'd even finished, the blue glow around the Shadow had begun to flare brighter and brighter, eventually swallowing it completely. With the sound of breaking glass, a small winged figure appeared in its place - then vanished, the light settling on Naoto instead and diffusing over her skin.
The team, familar with this, knew what to expect. Naoto didn't. Her eyes narrowed, and she grabbed her head - then collapsed to her hands and knees. Kanji jolted forward, wanting to help her up but not even sure where to start.
"What-what was that?" she hissed.
"You'll be fine, Naoto-kun." Rise knelt beside her. "Same thing happened to all of us."
Naoto blinked at her. "You're... certainly a devious bunch. No wonder the perpetrator has eluded the police." Hands leaning on her knees, she let out a shaky, humorless chuckle. "Can't believe you kept something like this hidden for so long."
"Yukiko did try to tell you," Yosuke pointed out.
Yukiko frowned. "I did?"
"Yeah, back at Tatsumi Port Island, the nightclub, you- ow! Stop doing that!"
Chie pulled her elbow back from Yosuke's ribs. "Yosuke, keep your mouth shut!" Casting an eye at Yukiko - who looked mildly horrified - she bit her lip. "Um... I'll explain later, okay?"
"Well, regardless..." Souji said, wincing slightly, "at least now we know this case isn't over."
"That's right." Yosuke winked at Naoto, flashing a quick grin. "And you proved it, Naoto."
"Yeah, s'right," Kanji interjected; only partly because Yosuke shouldn't be winking at anybody. He looked down at Naoto. "C'mon, kid. Let's get you out of here."
Too tired to reply, Naoto only managed a small nod - but for the first time Kanji could remember, and even if it was barely there, she genuinely smiled.
"Hey... hey!" Kanji dropped into a crouch in front of Naoto, trying to peer under her cap. "C'mon, answer!"
The only response was Naoto's ragged breathing.
They'd all tried to help her out the television; in fact, they'd argued with her over it. Kanji had even offered to carry her and been rewarded with a glare colder than a Bufu blast. Instead she'd insisted on doing it herself, then stumbled through the screen and fell face-down on the shop floor outside. Served her damn right - and yet Kanji was torn between helping her up and yelling at the top of his lungs. Since a few customers were still milling around the store, the second option wasn't really one at all. It was still damn tempting.
Chie shook her head. "Sheesh... Naoto-kun really put her life on the line for this."
"Nothing to be proud of," he muttered. Naoto didn't look right, either. Kanji racked his brains, trying to remember how he felt when the team pulled him out. Had he been so pale?
"No, it isn't," Souji agreed, voice low. "But if she hadn't, we wouldn't know the killer is still on the loose."
Which was fine, absolutely great - but sure as hell not worth dying for. Kanji growled, low and angry. "You're too frickin' reckless, dammit."
"I-I never doubted... that you'd all come for me," Naoto insisted, though the effect was lost given that she still couldn't raise her head. "...Though the reality has turned out to be far beyond what I'd imagined."
But they almost hadn't come for her. They hadn't known where to look, Naoto hadn't know what she was getting herself into, and the whole thing hadn't needed to happen. "Tch... what a dumbass!" Kanji snapped, pulling himself to his feet. "You're no genius at all. We were tearing our hair out over you!"
Naoto tipped her head back and looked up at him, frowning slightly.
A burst of pigtails latched onto his left arm. "Oh, so you did worry about her, Kanji!"
Heat rushed to Kanji's cheeks - and, as usual, he tried to divert people's attention by shouting. "Shuddup, Rise! Mind your own damn business!" Swallowing, he glanced quickly back at Naoto, who was still staring at him with the same expression. Maybe she hadn't heard.
"Okay, guys," Souji said, as he stepped in front of Rise, "Let's not have this conversation in the middle of Junes, all right? I think Naoto-kun needs to get home."
"I'll take her," Yukiko offered, bending down at Naoto's side.
"It's... all right... I can... "
"No way, missy!" Somehow, Rise had managed to bounce round Souji unnoticed. Kanji swore Naoto cringed. "Don't think that doing everything on your own is the 'adult' thing to do! Me and Yukiko-senpai'll take care of you."
Souji tipped his head towards Kanji. "You too, Tatsumi. Can't have them out causing trouble this late at night."
Again, Naoto flinched, this time muttering something under her breath. She leveled a frustrated glare at Yukiko, then Rise, then at Kanji - before finally giving a small nod.
Good job Senpai had sent Kanji with them. Naoto lived on the other side of town, a two mile walk, and the last bus had already left. Worse, she was being a major pain in the ass. She'd refused to let Yukiko and Rise help her walk, despite barely being able to stand upright. Tired and irritated, Kanji had reached his frustration threshold even quicker than usual - at which point he'd hoisted Naoto onto his back and firmly ignored the volley of protests that followed.
"Put me down," Naoto hissed, kicking him in the side for the third time in ten minutes. It didn't hurt, but it did piss him off; good thing, too. Devoting all his attention to staying angry kept Kanji from processing everything that had happened that night - including the fact that the guy he'd crushed on for the last five months was pressed up against him tight enough to feel each breath.
He growled deep in his throat. "You ever shut up?"
"I said... put me down," Naoto repeated. "You- you d-don't need to-"
"Give it a break!"
"I... I can walk!"
"Yep, Naoto-kun," Rise chirped. "We know. Just not in a straight line and not for more than a few seconds, right?"
Kanji felt another weak kick against his ribs. If Naoto wanted him to throw her into traffic, she was doing a damn good job. She wasn't even well enough to stand, same way Rise had been - except where Rise had gladly let them help her home and thanked them on the way, Naoto was just being a jerk.
"Well, we're almost there," Yukiko said lightly.
A fist thumped against Kanji's shoulder. "Then put me down!"
Rise let out a deep sigh. "I used to think you were so eloquent, Naoto-kun."
"And I used to think you had it all together," Kanji muttered. How one guy could be such different things was beyond him. This Naoto and the one he'd met before were like two separate people. "Why you gotta be so stubborn?"
"I, I don't need your help," Naoto mumbled against his back. "So... you don't need to be here."
A few steps ahead, Yukiko stopped in front of a tall apartment building. "Is this it, Naoto?"
Naoto peered up, one hand pressed against Kanji's head for support, and nodded.
"Good. Do you have your keys?"
"... Pocket." Though she punctuated her answer with another kick at Kanji, it felt halfhearted.
The apartment lobby was dimly lit, but they soon found the elevator. On their ride up Rise and Yukiko briefly debated whether they should knock on the apartment door and wake Naoto's grandfather up, or just let themselves in. Eventually they agreed on the second option; fewer questions.
Naoto didn't say a word the whole time. Kanji thought about asking how she was doing, before he noticed she wasn't kicking him anymore and decided not to risk it.
Yukiko led them down the hallway of the fourth floor, checking the numbers outside each apartment. When they found the right one, she quietly unlocked the door. "We don't want to wake anyone up," she whispered.
"You won't," Naoto murmured. "Nobody there."
"Oh... is your grandfather away?"
"D-doesn't live here. Put me down," she added.
With a sigh, Yukiko shook her head and pushed open the door - and, after a few seconds of fumbling, found the light switch inside.
The apartment was small and sparse. White walls and ceiling, plain wooden floors and the type of furniture you kept around because you needed it and closed your eyes to avoid looking at. The whole room was too neat and too empty. Save the cluttered shelves by the door, it looked like nobody lived there.
"Put me down," Naoto repeated. "Now."
"So, which one's your room?" Rise asked, cheerfully ignoring her.
With a dissatisfied grunt, Naoto made a vague gesture towards a door on the left wall. Kanji moved towards it - and was stopped short by a hand tugging hard on his shirt. "Kanji! Stop right there!"
For all girls raved about their clothes, none of them ever respected his. "Dammit, let go!"
"C'mon, are you seriously gonna walk right into a girl's bedroom?" Rise yanked his shirt again for emphasis. "Put Naoto-kun on her feet."
Somewhere below his shoulder-blades, Naoto let out a muffled groan.
Kanji blinked. "Oh. Right."
For all her complaints, Naoto didn't seem any happier standing. Her mood went downhill further when Rise and Yukiko grabbed her arms and dragged her into her room. "Stop it! Just, j-just go away, I don't-"
"You never stop, do you?" Yukiko muttered, as the door closed behind them - leaving Kanji standing in the middle of someone else's apartment, feeling useless and out of place.
He hadn't even taken off his shoes, though it didn't seem like Naoto would care. This place felt nothing like the shopping district. Looked more like the pictures of hotel rooms he'd seen in magazines: clean, generic, sterile. The only exception was the pile of papers tucked under the door of the closet on the far wall. Struck with the urge to pick them up and straighten them out, Kanji deliberately turned away. You didn't go to someone's house and tidy, no matter how messy or neat it was or how much you liked-
Kanji grimaced and went back to looking around the room. Nothing else held his attention, until his gaze drifted back to the shelves. Three were crammed full of books, some upright, some on their sides, none of them in any order he could recognize. A few of them had long technical names printed on their spines, but the rest were dog-eared paperbacks, all with similar unhappy titles. Murder in a Hearse, Danger Goes on Holiday, The Doorbell Brings Death.
Kanji skipped the rest, deciding that Naoto needed to read more books about kittens and fewer with dead bodies.
The fourth shelf held binders full of papers, probably just police documents, and two framed photographs at opposite ends. One was an old guy in a suit. The other photograph looked creased, like it'd been kept folded up, but Kanji could see a man and a woman standing side-by-side. The man - dark-haired and slim, with angled features - looked a lot like Naoto.
Pretty telling, really.
"Okay, Kanji-kun. You and me are heading out." Rise stood in the bedroom doorway, Yukiko close behind.
Kanji frowned. "What 'bout Naoto? We're not just gonna leave him, right?"
"Her, Kanji."
"Yeah, her. Whatever." He gestured around the living room. "Ain't no-one else here. Who's gonna look after her?"
An irate voice came from somewhere behind Yukiko's shoulder. "I... I do not need looking after!"
Yukiko didn't even turn around. "Naoto-kun, get back in bed before I throw you in there!"
Rise and Kanji both glanced at each other, eyebrows arched.
"And Kanji-kun," Yukiko continued, with an exasperated sigh, "there's no need to worry. Chie can cover for me, so I'll stay here tonight."
Naoto's response was an unhappy choking noise. Before it had chance to turn into a full-on incoherent outburst, Rise grabbed Kanji's arm. "Great idea, Yukiko-senpai! C'mon, Kanji."
The last thing Kanji heard as Rise dragged him out the apartment door was the final protest of a very tired, very indignant Naoto Shirogane - suddenly muffled by what might just have been a face full of mattress.