I was pretty much held down in that seat, one man on either side, the windows sliding up quickly as we left the panicked Wilifred behind on the street. I could barely breathe, my heart racing, and I was aware someone was touching my hair.

That was weird.

It took a very long minute before I realised the person that had his arms around my shoulders and was speaking to me was... Alberto.

Alberto?

I stared up at him, still panicked, and finally I began to understand what was being said.

"-she'll calm down eventually." He was speaking to the others now, his arm tight around my shoulders, and I realised that his hand was stroking my hair again. Smart butler. Must have realised somehow that it calmed people down.

"Al...Alberto?"

"See? Otis." He spoke the keyword as he released my shoulders and sighed with relief, sitting back on his side, arms folding neatly in his lap. "I was asked to come. We were worried you'd panic."

I felt embarrassed all of a sudden. Oh yeah. There was that bodyguard who had left me at the aquarium for a smoke. Some of the others were familiar too from around the Manse. I … had more or less panicked without needing to. "Woops." So much for the amazing heroine baiting bad guys.

"Please- don't feel that way." Alberto must have red my embarrassment all over my face. "This is why I came."

"I guessed that." It kind of hurt to look at Alberto though. I gazed forward at my knees, breathing in and out as I slowly regained some sense of normality, and tried to think. "So you got my message?"

"Message? No." The bodyguard on my other side nodded back. "There were several suspicious men about to take you. We don't intend on letting them get you that easily."

Oh right. The show. I guess it'd been pretty real looking. "You sure it wasn't Prince Wilifred?"

"...why would we think that? No. We identified them clearly." The bodyguard seemed confused. "Prince Wilifred is at the Manse."

"No, I just saw him. Back there." I gestured back. "I'd know that face anywhere after seeing it daily."

This caused a flurry of activity, all of a sudden, one of the bodyguards heading for a radio. There was a soft argument.

"No, it wasn't … I'm aware Tomcat is at the party... this wasn't the expected runaway." He frowned.

I could only guess 'Tomcat' referred to Roberto, when Alberto sighed with relief, and the bodyguard explained what I'd seen.

"What was he wearing?"

I told them what I remembered and realised what was wrong. If Wilifred was there pretty much in the same place as two of my Father's hired kidnappers, would... what would they do? If they recognised him, would they hurt him?

My anxiety started to rise suddenly, listening anxiously, waiting. Someone had gone to find him now with Claude- who apparently had assumed he was sick in bed. Wilifred had given him the slip. What the hell had he done that for? To make sure I was okay? Anger rose as well. I was angry at him. I was worried as all hell. Stupid man!

It was a very tense drive back to the Manse. A very long tense drive. It was just as we arrived that they reported he'd contact them about my kidnapping and was now safely being driven back.

I wanted to kill him for that.

Whatever I'd planned on saying was put on hold when I saw Claude more or less walking Wilifred into the Manse. Claude was back to his frightening self again... I suspected I didn't have to be mad with a butler like that. I watched him get walked away, his head low, but he met my eyes and smiled a relieved smile.

Honestly, I'd been scared I'd been taken as well, so who could blame him for being startled?

Prince Keith strode past, apparently heading for Wilifred, so I figured I may as well distract him. Wilifred didn't need two people scolding him.

I called out, "Get your dolphins?"

He froze, turning towards me on the spot, and for a moment I was sure he was about to tell me off for buying too many things. He had said 'all the dolphins'. I'd given him all the dolphins. Prince Keith then nodded. "Yes. You did a good job. We are... selecting the correct... ones. The rest will be thrown away."

"What!" I exclaimed as he went to continue away. "That's a waste! Give them to orphans or something. Shesh."

He hesitated, staring back at me, a weird soft laugh sound coming from him, before Prince Keith shook his head and continued on down the hall after Wilifred and Claude. I crossed my arms as best as I could... given that I was still dependant on those crutches.

Soon I was more or less alone and the excitement of the afternoon, mixed with the pain in my leg, promoted me to head for my own room. The last thing I wanted to do was to run into Roberto's little harem of willing brides... as tempting as it was to beat one of them up again.

I hobbled in the direction of my room, more or less guided through the maze of hallways by the maid, and found myself in an aquarium wonderland.

There was a TV now, with the DVDs from the aqurium set out in front of it, a small army of plushies all over my bed, I could see several costumes hanging up in the closet, several boxes of 'marine life hats' that I'd thought would make great presents, several of those sparkly fish crowns dangling over the antique bed frame, a mosquito net … dark blue and with sparkly tiny schools of fish in the fabric... draped over the bed, several boxes of what looked like erasers, pencils, children's toys, children's dressup sets, a few of those very large marine beanbags, and that was what I could see. There were clearly more boxes inside the wardrobe. Baby clothes! I even had baby clothes!

I wasn't sure how but somehow that woman, who'd been responsible for all the dolphin items, had decided everything I touched was also important. The maid grinned as she led me inside.

"I set it all up." She informed me.

I gaped. Okay. I'd touched more than a few things in there, mostly admiring or amused, and … wow. I wasn't sure if I felt bad or if I was amused. What would have Prince Keith thought? I wasn't sure I wanted to ask.

That stupid giant seal, the one that'd looked so much like Roberto, that sat there too. I was tempted to ask her to give THAT to some orphan somewhre... except that Otis had made it his friend. Somehow the tiny pug puppy had crawled on top of the seal head, snuggled into the face, and was fast asleep on his back.

"Um." That was the only sound I could think of. Seriously. Pencil sharpenrs, dvds, those silly crowns, those silly marine life hats... I had thought about giving htem to the Princes but... and I flopped down on the bed. "Wow. I … didn't mean for her to just …"

The maid hesitated. "Sorry..."

"It's fine. It's kind of funny. I was just admiring these things and I guess... I guess the shop manager decided I wanted them all." I shook my head and picked up a hairbrush complete with floating fish inside. Oh boy. Child sized brush.

She laughed, covered her mouth, and shook as she muffled her laughter in her hand. "...that … that explains... I'm sorry, excuse me, we were … so confused... I mean, there's so much!"

"We?"

"The maids!"

Oh. I flushed and then laughed as well, shaking my head, and held out the brush. "Here. Have a brush."

"I think I know a young lady that might like it." She took it, her body still shaking, as she slipped it into a pocket. "What you like to do with all of it?"

"Um. I suppose I had told Prince Keith to give it to orphans. Hadn't I? "Has Liberty got orphanages?"

"Yes, I believe so."

"Then I think I'll be up late tonight sorting these things out. I ...I might keep a few things." I added as Otis grunted in his sleep, his paws twitching on top of his seal plushie mountain, resolve fading somewhat. Oh god. I couldn't part a puppy and his seal plushie.

"Of course, my lad... I mean, Sophia. Keep what you like." She lifted up a toddler's bib, stared at it a moment, and then she started to shake with laiugher again. "S... sorry. It's just... why would … this is for a baby!"

"Okay then. That's going to an orphanage. We better get a box. The maids can take things home if they have kids too."

Once she'd set me up with tea and my pills outside in the courtyard, the maid vanished for a box, and I shook my head as I played with one of the sparkly fish crowns in the evening sunlight. For crying out loud. Someone had even glued rhinestones onto the fish for eyes. It was kind of cute, sure, but …

I shook my head as I stuck it on my head a moment, grinning at my own reflection in my tea, with a school of fish perching upon my head.

"That's... unique."

I jumped as I gazed up. There was a small pack of feral... well, high heeled women... and they were staring at me with open mockery as I tugged the crown off, my face flushing.

"I think it's just sad." Another woman commented. She didn't seem sad and she whispered loud enough for me to hear, "I heard common girls do dream of becoming Princesses."

"Is that so?" Another woman whispered. "How tragic. She must believe the crown has geninue diamonds on it."

There was a titter and I rolled my eyes, face flushed with embarrassment, as they continued to gawk at me over the fence. Then one of them looked nto the room behind me. "Look at her room!"

Oh good lord. It was like being in a zoo. They were laughing, mocking every last 'tacky' thing, and when I went to drink the tea and ignored them, I heard one of them whisper about 'Look, she's trying to pretend she's a lady.'

I flung the crown at them. It wasn't a light crown either. They all scattered, suddenly, and the crown didn't hit them. Roberto blinked stupidly as a crown smacked into his chest, gazing down at the object when it fell, while the women went quiet.

"How violent. She's little more than a feral creature. I... I must protest to Prince Keith about her presence." One of them seemed shocked. I didn't believe it. "She could have hurt you."

"Lady Annabelle is still bedridden from her attack..." Another voice whispered. "I'm scared! Roberto- I couldn't bear to sleep knowing she's around!"

Oh good god. I stared at them, heart thudding hard as Roberto froze there, his eyes down, unable to look at him directly. I knew that they were trying to mock me with those words... but instead, they were giving me ideas. Yes. Pranking them in their sleep was an excellent idea.

"Your Highness..." Another had appeared, her foot raising, "Let me break it for you. Are you injured?"

"Such a tacky object too. Careful! It totally might contain poison. My Daddy says that plastics contain dangerous chemicals." Daddy? The woman had to be at least thirty, I had to assume, and while I had no issue with older women... this one was dressed in the most innocent type clothing, as if she was trying to pretend she was half her age, and speaking like a teenager. It was weird.

Roberto ignored them, bending, and picked up the crown. He gazed at it, eyes fixed on it, and I blinked as he slowly turned it around his fingers, his face contorting. Was he … smiling?

Was he making fun of me as well?

I wasn't sure if I'd ignored it though. He thrust it towards Alberto, who'd followed behind, and continued to walk away. He hadn't looked at me once, arms sliding around the women, and I ignored the smug looks.

And when I heard the words, "Roberto- am I the one you'll read to tonight in my room?" my heart crashed and burned.

Oh god. Even that. He was sharing even that.

I left the tea, took the pill, and went back inside to hide again. As soon as the door was shut and the curtains drawn, I shut my eyes, sunk down onto the ground, and gave up trying to pretend I was fine. All I could see was Roberto touching them, their mocking eyes, all of that. I wasn't fine.

Because, even though I found them all pathetic, the simple fact of the matter was that Roberto intended on marrying one of them. And he didn't want me. That meant that every word they said now, every single word, cut deeper than I wanted to admit.

And for the first time I realised that I... I would have liked it. Even though it'd be hard, even though I had no clue what kind of life it'd be, I … I knew that as long as I had Roberto there, as much a friend as someone I loved, I'd cope with that new life. I didn't care if they made me a lesser rank, or whatever it was they called lower people, didn't care if I couldn't become Princess or whatever. That wouldn't have bothered me in the slightest.

I wanted to marry that stupid man. Not his crown. I just wanted to be the one to stand behind him and support him.

Of course, when Claude came to return my phone, I wasn't in much mood to talk, and he clearly wasn't in much mood to be around someone so clearly depressed. The maid seemed to think it was better I was alone as well- she dropped the box off and went off to do her own thing. At least she returned briefly to offer me a giant tub of choc chip icecream, in a box to keep it cool, and chocolate... and some alcohol.

Nice lady. I made sure it wasn't wasted.

I was kind of relieved about that though. Time alone wasn't something I seemed to be getting a lot of that night and my good mood had vanished. There was something peaceful about sitting there on my own with Otis, who had spent three hours playing with seal and eating his dinner before passing out again, with just a few bottles of strawberry cider, chocolate, and my depression.

I knew that Roberto and his 'ladies' had gone out again for star viewing- I heard them very loudly as they passed my garden, making it very clear to me what they were up to and who with, and while I didn't hear Roberto's voice.. I knew that he and the other Princes would join them.

When I saw fireworks in the distance my heart sunk further. I liked fireworks. I went to sit outside, snuggling up to a otter with a dumbo octopus hat on my head, a octopus scarf around my neck, playing dully with my alcohol … which I'd tipped into a giant dolphin glass that had pretty flashing bubbles. The fireworks were half blocked but usually that wouldn't have bothered me.

I just felt depressed and heart broken. That was it. They were watching fireworks without me. All of them. Even the ones who were friendly to me. It was as I was drinking the alcohol, getting wonderfully light headed and whiny, I decided.

I had two choices tonight. Keep crying my eyes out, surrounded by marine love, or I could be a survivor and go prank those women.

It was pretty obvious, after three bottles of strawberry cider tipped into a flashing dolphin cup, what I had to do. I wasn't a victim. I was a survivor! Sore leg aside. I had work to do.

"Right, Captain Dumbo and Captain Octypus," I informed my scarf and my hat, as I gazed into a mermaid ringed child's mirror, "We've got work to do. And drinks to drink. You're fish. You need … need more ...alcohol. Right? Right."

Once I'd roused a maid to help, we snuck around the passages, using a tiny starfish flashlight to light the way. It was kind of hard to stumble around drunk on crutches so... I'd given up and gone for the wheelchair.

It just made sense to me. So did more strawberry cider.

With my scarf over my face and the hat hiding my head I felt a bit like a ninja. It was great fun.

The problem was- I wasn't sure what pranks to pull. Luckily I had a maid for that. She vanished into the kitchens and reappeared with food dye.

The woman was a genius. A genuine genius. I decided she was my best friend then and there and probably would have hugged her except that she complained the wheelchair kept bumping her legs. Woops. So we had one idea. I used google on the phone to make sure I had more ideas. The wise google informed me about the classic 'hand into warm water' prank. After a brief discussion... we agreed that was probably better. We didn't want to dye their hair.

Not yet.

We could save that for another time.

We were very quiet, sneaking from room to room, the maid returned that and brought back a mug of warm water from the kitchen halfway there. And then we attacked.

The plan was to only strike two of the women- so it wasn't totally suspicious- and as far as I could tell... it worked. I admittedly had to wait outside, I was too drunk to stay quiet, but the maid reported a 'funny smell'. The only downside was that... I'd spotted Roberto sneaking around the hallways as well. That brought down the mood a little.

It was late when I was helped into bed, half depressed and half amused, and snuggled against my little army of plushes, letting the alcohol sooth me into a disturbed sleep.