Chapter 22

Each of the four seasons has a special symbolization

Spring represents fertility and youth

Summer represents harmony and perfection

Autumn represents ripeness and knowledge

Winter represents sadness... and death.

The incapable of ground-departure Misaki with a jam-packed stage of hesitation bit by bit moved the knife up to his neck, his hands holding the knife became shakier as it crept closer. It was done in verge of slaughtering himself to death, to the finale of all of the pain and sufferings, for the freedom from Akihiko's hands that had blocked his stream of happiness. He wondered, should he or shouldn't he?

"If I died, would it solve everything...?"

He continuously debated himself on whether suicide would be his awaited saviour, or an omen that only could make things getting worse. It was a strange conclusion made by deeply miserable people that the price of escaping from pain needed to be paid by pain. The first thing that came into his head once he died was meeting his late parents in the Heaven whom he had been missed for 14 years, which he would call forever. How badly he wanted to see their faces once again, how eagerly he wanted to feel their touches and hear their voices once again, how enthusiastically he wanted to throw himself into their arms.

"I hope so." he mentally muttered before closing his eyes as the first step of all forms of preparations before his everlasting slumber, he will not open those pure and innocent eyes ever again. The knife in his hand started to dig some blood on top of his neck, tears dripped from his squinted eyes as he was holding the piercing sensations.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Misaki could intently felt his heart at the verge of stopping upon hearing Akihiko's threatening voice slapping his ears. As for Akihiko he saw his boy toy on the floor constantly as if a slug and his neck was bleeding. The sliverhaired man clearly was not amused with the tool that the brunet was using and what he obviously used it for.

"Why you little..."

Akihiko slapped the knife away from Misaki's hands and then pinned the brunet's arms on the floor with one hand. "I see that you are getting stupider these days," Akihiko's other hand was used to insert his digits into the brunet's arse, making scissoring movements. "You're barely able to move now and yet I always see you doing stupid things."

"Man, still tight as always."

"Ah...!" Misaki let out a painful yelp as something was moving inside him while maintaining his breath through his mouth, which Akihiko was quick to notice.

"Nice try you got there to gain my sympathy, by malingering. Don't try to fool me with you stopped breathing normally and starting to breathe through your mouth instead. Your futile efforts here are not going to affect me in the slightest."

"Akihiko-san... I'm not malingering... My nose is blocked with too much blood so..." said Misaki between puffs of his breath. Akihiko didn't say anything as a reply – he slapped Misaki hard across the face instead.

"Do you think I am going to trust you? The answer is no I'm telling you, NOT IN ANY LEAST." The silverhaired man pulled his pants down and began thrusting himself violently into the brunet. "Come to think of it that annoying mangaka keep bothering me with calls from your phone. Why didn't you block him like I asked you before?"

"Because... I am working with him..."

"Do you think you're STILL working with him now?" Akihiko was annoyed with the boy's stupidity. He squeezed Misaki's neck between his large hands, suffocating the boy. "Judging from how you are now I know what the real reason is," he leaned closed to the boy's ear and whispered. "It's because you're a slut."

Still not letting go of Misaki's neck, Akihiko let out a disappointed sigh. "If only I could track the mangaka's location right now, I would've just killed him."The brunet's emerald eyes widened in shock. Then, "Akihiko-san..." his hands tightly clutching on the older man's shirt. "Please don't harm anyone just for the sake of me!" He stared at him with glassy eyes.

Akihiko's blood was boiled vigorously; he furiously yanked a handful of Misaki's chocolate hair and dragged him to the bathroom. "Feeling thirsty?" he shoved the brunet's head inside the toilet bowl. One hand keeping Misaki's head in place whilst the other one turned the flush down, he mercilessly drowned the brunet in. Luckily the toilet water was sublimely clean from any wastes – or else Misaki would have a more disgusting gourmet forced down his throat than last night.

"Misaki," Akihiko pulled him out. "Do you love that mangaka so much?" He said, gripping the brunet's hair. Misaki gasped for some oxygen before he replied; his hair and face completely being drenched in water. "I-I do lo-love him... But..."

"I knew that would be your answer." Akihiko briefly left the bathroom and returned with a long iron rod with him much to Misaki's horror, the horridness grew more intense as the silverhaired man made his first move by landing a powerful blow onto the brunette's head with the rod. Then followed by another and another onto the different portions of his fragile frame that the rod afterwards shortly became liquefied in crimson.

"Good job Misaki, I never felt this good while working." Akihiko said happily as he was working over his laptop, his fingers swiftly jazzed on the keyboard in a tune as if a musician playing his piano. What had made him feeling so comfortable was Misaki who was drinking him under the table. Akihiko at an occasion will move his hand underneath him to ruffle the boy's hair, encouraging him to suck further.

"Finally," the silverhaired man signalled his finish, he switched his laptop off and folded it down. Misaki was going to pull away but Akihiko stopped him from doing so, "Clean it with your tongue." he immediately commanded. Being terrified that Akihiko would have something brutal up to his sleeves if he didn't abide by so Misaki stuck his tongue out and licked the item he had sucked seconds ago, from bottom to the tip to wipe the white fluid away.

Akihiko let Misaki to crawl himself out, his small structure was going numb from crouching too long under the table. "Tomorrow is Christmas." He stood up from the chair and leaned down on the floor, facing the slumped brunet. "I would gladly do anything for you, so what you want me to do for your Christmas present? Make you being wet from top to bottom with cum or having hickeys all over your body?"

"...Kill me."

"What?" Akihiko asked while raising an eyebrow and a bewildered look plastered on his face, he couldn't be sure of whether his ears were having problems or his auditory nerve had sent the wrong information to his brain.

"Please kill me! I cannot take it anymore! If my existence here is so troublesome to you then j-just-...! K-k-kill me and... And end it all...!" said Misaki with his tears fast dribbling from his dull eyes past his cheeks.

"...Are you kidding with me?!" Akihiko clenched his fists in anger, "That's the most selfish request I ever heard from you." He stomped the brunet's head and rubbed it against the floor with his foot. "What could've I gain from killing you other than me being forever alone and you happily in the Heaven all for yourself?"

"Killing you is something I wouldn't do..." The silverhaired man stretched his hand upwards to reach one of the large bookcases inside his workroom and pushed it down – to crash it and all of its content of thick and large books on top of Misaki. "Punishing you is more appropriate." With all of the weight dropped onto him, Misaki was hurting at both outside and inside him; he could feel his whole skeleton cracking at the single bit and a puddle of blood began to appear and grow in size under the fallen bookcase and the crushed boy.

"Listen to me, Misaki. If I hadn't fallen in love with you, you will be the most worthless piece of crap ever. You don't even have any planning for your own future and no want will ever need you because you are such an idiot not only in your studies, besides there's nothing much you could do because of your lack of abilities. You failed in almost everything that you do and you also failed in being a good lover for me. You're such a lowlife creature that I would say that you rank somewhere below thrash, or maybe below shit."

Of all injuries ranging from physical from emotional, Akihiko's the-reason-you-suck speech was the most painful Misaki had received that the every words mouthed by Akihiko was like a hammer that broke his heart and shattered it into billion pieces. He felt so shameful of himself. Once again, he remarked himself as a burden like he usually did since the first tragedy he ever had in his life.

"So do you get it?" He said, lifting the bookcase away and brushed the books off from the heavily wounded brunet. "My, my, look at you now. So filthy... You're red everywhere." The older man stared to the boy's form which was screening as if he had been showered with scarlet-coloured water. "Ah well," Akihiko paused as he stood up to leave the room, which had traumatized Misaki if he will bring something hazardous with him again. "Be back later."

Akihiko returned with a bottle of expensive wine being held in one of his large hands, neither giving any signs nor information he plunged the mouth of the bottle into Misaki's entrance. He forced the wine to flow inside Misaki until it fully drunken the boy – Akihiko's ulterior motive to satisfy himself for the night before Christmas.

The older man always loved the sweet and innocent face of the brunet, heck he will love it better if it consisted of his eyes being half-opened and his cheeks deeply flushed in cherry as its toppings. "You're looking like an angel now, Misaki." He cupped the brunet's face between his hands, gazing towards it with starving eyes. "How cute..."

"You're so dirty now but I don't care... As long that you're Misaki then you're still enjoyable for me to fuck." said Akihiko while stripping himself naked before doing on Misaki over the floor.

"Misaki." Akihiko held the exhausted from sex Misaki on the floor into a sitting position after putting his pants on, not going to make his shirt dirty with blood. "Cling on my neck." he ordered. Misaki sheepishly wrapped his arms around Akihiko's neck even though he in fact barely had the power to lift a single finger. Smirking upon his obedience, the silverhaired man stood up and carried the brunet outside his workroom and headed towards the large living room.

Akihiko kicked the sliding door open to the side and placed Misaki at the balcony of his penthouse. "You'll be sleeping here for tonight. Fresh air is good for you." He cruelly declared. It was one of his sadistic antics where he will make Misaki slept at the balcony during winter, to make things worse while being completely nude without wearing anything.

"Good night." he said, he pecked the good night kiss on the brunet's lips before he left him alone outside and locked the door.

The dark bluish night sky was coupled with continuous falling snow altogether with chilly winds that were freezing Misaki to death throughout the hours of darkness; he was shivering nonstop and he tried to keep himself warm with puffing his breath towards his small hands. With the slightest amount of effort he had he closed his eyes and forced himself to sleep, it was no use for him to fret over everything.

"My parents in Heaven... Niichan's family and Ijuuin-sensei in Osaka... And my friends out there... I wish you all a very happy Christmas..." he whispered out of nowhere.

"Santa-san," he whispered again but this time in a quieter tone, "I'm sorry for troubling you as maybe I'm now too old for this but are you really exist...? If so, then..." before he could continue his words, his consciousness faded away with his tears trickled down his eyes as he closed them out of his awareness. He was only able to proceed in his thoughts.

"As soon as I opened my eyes on the next day, I wish for no more pain... Yeah, that's what I want for Christmas this year."

Special thanks awarded to WattaAne for a bit of idea in this chapter (which is the part where Misaki drinks Akihiko under the table).

For the readers here who loved Christmas, I'm really sorry... I think I had greatly ruined it. I don't have any ideas for the omake now so... Please answer this and be honest! This time I expect long reviews...

1. From the scale of 1 to 10, how much would you rate this story?

2. Do you think this story should get more readers?

3. In your opinion, what is the most shocking scene in the story?

4. What is your least favourite scene in the story?

5. What is your favourite scene in the story?

6. Omake: keep it or kill it, replace it with a more serious author's note?

7. What do you think of my new writing style (this is not beta-ed)?

8. What do you think of this OOC Akihiko?

9. What kind of mood you always get while reading?

10. Last but not least, are you reading this even though OOC-ness and violence/dark stuffs are not your cup of tea?

What I meant by "ran out of ideas" by the previous (fake) chapter is I don't have any ideas for the torture anymore, not for what will going to happen next. You got it? But still, the ideas made me happy upon reading them :) But I guess that I will reject almost all of your ideas since that I don't want this story to end up being 'Gore Without Plot' and finish the story after 3 or 4 chapters... I had planned the ending already for a long time ago.

So everyone... ;A; *get on knees and begged* I'm begging you all, please read 'The Shadow Singer' by shuusetsu aka my beloved Haru-neechan! I guarantee that you will immediately fell in love with the story just from reading the summary, so please read it now, onegai! TAT It's for Haru-neechan!

www dot fanfiction dot net /s/8920169/1/ The-Shadow-Singer