Against All Odds- Chapter 12
"Yes I do, I guess maybe if I had not pushed him for too much then he would not have reacted like he did."
Dr. Flynn frowned at me and put down his notes as he sighed, "Ana there is the root of your nightmares. You feel responsible for hurting him and in turn, you think that because you hurt him he hurt you."
Christian shifted next to me, and then he squeezed my hand as I spoke. "Well he said that he had the answer to our problems. He was trying to make me happy."
"Ana." I heard a stern tone in Christian's voice as he interrupted us, "You know that he crossed the line with that stunt. He used you and he is still trying to use you."
"I am hearing that you two have discussed this but I am concerned Ana that you need to find a way to forgive yourself. All you did was love someone, yes it did not work out but not all relationships do. Now this also concerns me that it sounds like the relationship is not entirely over?"
"It is over on my end; Jose is the one that is announcing to the world that I am pregnant."
"He did that?" Flynn shook his head and then looked at his watch. "Our hour is up for today but Ana I want to see you again tomorrow if possible. Tonight I want you to work on forgiving yourself."
"I can do tomorrow and I will try but that might be hard."
"Yes it will be but you have to realize that he is the one responsible for hurting you and I know you said in your dreams you keep looking for Christian and you cannot find him. We will discuss that tomorrow. For tonight just try to think positively of yourself and your actions."
Nodding to him I peeked over to see Christian staring at me. His face tells it all, his love for me shows in the soft but protective way he is watching me. It made me blush which caught his eye. With a flirty grin he winked at him then said good bye to Dr. Flynn.
As soon as we were out of his office Christian swept me into his arms and hugged me tightly. "You did well Ana; I hope he can help you. I do not like to see you like you are when you have your nightmares. It breaks my heart because I feel helpless."
"But you are the only one who can calm me." I stared up at him before kissing his lips softly right there in the office waiting room. "Christian Grey you have already been more helpful to me in the short time I have known you than anyone else in my whole life."
"Maybe because I love you more than anyone else in your life ever has?
"Maybe."
"Come Ms. Steele, let's go and see if I can find us someplace you would like to eat for lunch."
"Oh you, I think you will manage. You do seem to know all the things that I love."
With another wink to me Christian led us to his car and we headed off to have lunch. Sitting across from him I was still in awe of this man. He gave to me everything without question and without asking for a thing back. Never had I known anyone like him.
As we ate I had to ask him, "Christian, I don't want to offend you but I want you to know that I plan on someday trying to repay you for all you are doing for me. Would you object to that?"
"Yes Ana I would. I. Love. You. That is why I am doing these things, no repayment is necessary."
"Nothing I can do?"
"Well there is one thing you can do for me."
"Anything."
"You can tell me that you love me again."
"I love you Mr. Grey."
He grinned at me as if I had just told him he had won the lottery and it made me giggle. "See that is all I need; now I am a very happy man."
"If that is all you want I will just have to tell you each and every day."
"Do that and I will be the happiest man alive."
"Oh you, you are always the flatterer. I do love you Christian, and not just for all the things you are doing for me but for just loving me."
"I have loved you since the first time we met."
"You loved that Ana? The confident, sexy one right?"
"Yes the one I am staring at right now."
"I think you bring her out of me, she was hiding out before I met you."
"Not for too long I hope." He grinned at me, "she makes the world a much brighter place."
"Oh gez Mr. Grey have you had a bit too much wine? Perhaps I should drive us back to your place?'
"I am fine Ms. Steele but brat I thank you for your concern. Hey who said a thing about going back to my place?"
"Well I just assumed."
"No way, I want to take you shopping."
"Shopping?"
"Yes Ana perhaps you have heard of the concept. You go to a place that sells things and you pick out what you like."
"Yes dork, I know what shopping is. I just don't do it much."
"Why?"
I shrugged, "no money?"
"Then you are in luck, I am paying. Let's go."
"No way, you want to pay for my clothes too?"
"Yes then if I happen to rip something off you I won't feel guilty."
"WHAT?" I choked on my last sip of water and stared at him. "Christian!"
"Ana please, I know I have been good so far but that won't last much longer."
"Well you have 7 days till my shot has us free and clear."
"I think I can work around that."
"Fine let's go. Take me shopping."
Dragging me out to all these fancy store Christian seemed to light up as he made me try on dress after dress and shoes to match. I laughed at him and was soon having so much fun I forgot to care that he was paying for it all. We were just the brat and the dork having fun. Shopping was never so interesting.
Then he picked up the most gorgeous red dress I had ever seen. Looking at myself in the dressing room mirror I saw an Ana I had not seen in a long time. Her face was lit up and she looked so happy. Then as I walked out the look on Christian's face told me exactly how amazing I looked in it.
He cleared his throat loudly then announced to the sales lady who was helping us, "Sold."
Laughing softly I walked closer to kiss him, "I love this one, not sure I want to take it off."
"Well then don't. I was planning to take you out tonight anyway. Leave it on if you want."
"Take me out where?"
"I have something planned."
"Hello there Christian."
Still in his arms I peeked over his shoulder to see who it was, oh fuck Elena. Christian bristled at the sound of her greeting but didn't show it. He whispered to me as he kissed my cheek. "Do not let her see you get worked up. Go and change. I will be waiting for you."
"Won't you introduce your girlfriend to your new friend?" Elena pushed her way closer to us and stood looking at me curiously. "Don't I know you?"
"Elena, this is my girlfriend Ana." He was back in full control as he let me go and then winked at me. "Ana get changed; we don't want to be late."
"Christian I am your girlfriend and mother of your child remember?" I heard Elena hiss at him as I walked back to the dressing room.
Changing quickly as I listened I could make out Christian's voice stern and low. "Address yourself as that again Elena and you won't have to worry about me supporting either you or this baby of yours. I will forget that I know you."
"You would not dare, you would forget your own child?"
"Elena last time, listen closely. That is not my child; until I see a DNA test I will not acknowledge it or you. Do. You. Understand?"
I peeked my head out not wanting to be seen but the sales lady quickly came my way, "Are you done Ms.?"
"Um yeah, here are what we are getting."
Christian takes my hand and pulled me with him to pay. Elena walked off but I could still feel her eyes on me. "Ana you changed out of the red dress?"
"Oh yes I did, I want to get all ready before I put it back on."
After signing his name quickly Christian eyed me. Grabbing the bags with one hand his other hand rubbed my back gently pushing me towards the door. Outside in the car he looked over at me, "that is not why you changed. Please don't let her ruin our night."
"I won't but that kind of killed the mood."
"Well let me fix that." He leaned over to kiss me then as he drove he turned on the radio singing along with me.
Back at his place Christian disappears into his office while I went through my new clothes. It had not seemed like so much in the stores but as I pulled it out I was shocked by it all. I haven't bought this many clothes in one trip ever. I started to fold things and just as I was wondering where to put them he popped his head into the room.
"You can have half of the closet space and here let me make you room in the dresser." He slipped past me to start rearranging his drawers.
"Really? Just like that?"
"Of course, I want you to have room for your things."
"So you want me to live here with you?"
"I thought you already were?"
I laughed hard at that, "Well I guess I am but we didn't make it official. I don't have a key."
"Ms. Steele difficult as ever." He disappeared from the room then came back with a single key on a keychain with a silver heart dangling from it. "I was going to give you this later but you are so impatient. Here is your key, Ana Steele will you move in with me? I want your lovely face to be the last thing I see every night and the first thing every morning."
"Oh Christian." My eyes teared up and I had to reach over to hug him as I took the keychain. "YES! I would love to be your roomie."
"Just so you know I expect that to be roomie with benefits." He grinned at me.
"BAD YOU! But.." I grinned back, "We might be able to arrange that.
"Okay so I will leave you to put your clothes away but oh pack a small overnight bag. I am taking my roomie for a sleepover someplace else tonight."
"But you have already done so much..."
My words are cut off by his finger over my lips, "shush and get ready. Be ready to leave in an hour red dressed up baby."
"Yes Sir." I nodded then shoved him out of the room as I started to get ready.
Exactly an hour later I was ready and waiting in the living room dressed in the red dress with my hair piled up in curls. I was so nervous, this would be our first official date but as soon as he walked in the room in his black suit I just grinned. He looked so handsome and he was mine. All mine!
"Wow Mr. Grey you do know how to make an entrance."
"Shush now Ms. Steele, I am still stunned by the sight of you right here, right now."
Without another word he swept me into his arms kissing me hard. As we got tangled in that kiss I forgot everything else letting my tiny clutch fall to the floor as I wrapped my arms around him pulling him closer. I don't know how long we kissed but suddenly Christian pushed me back gently.
You keep that up and we won't leave this house tonight."
"Okay I will stop but you started it."
"Yes I did but now I am ending it. Ana…" His eyes were shining bright as he looked at me, "Do you trust me?"
He put one hand into his pocket and pulled out a black silk blindfold, I eyed him then nodded slowly, "I do trust you."
"I want this to be a complete surprise." He gently put the blindfold on me trying not to mess up my hair. "Okay now let me lead you."
I held onto his hand tightly as he led me outside and helped me into the car but I sensed this was different. I was in the backseat then suddenly I heard the door across from me open and Christian slipped in. "Hey you are not driving?"
"Not tonight I wanted to have my hands free...for this."
Then one of his hands ran up my neck pulling my head back gently as his lips brushed my neck. I immediately reached for him but he pushed my hands away. "No touching Ms. Steele, just lie back and let me take care of you."
Music came on then and the sweet sounds of Ne-Yo filled the car. I got lost in the songs and his kisses which started soft and then grew harder and deeper as he traveled up one side of my neck to my jaw. As his kisses moved to my lips I felt him pressing hard to force open my mouth. Then the tip of his tongue brushed mine as we started to melt into each other.
Again I started to bring my hands towards him but this time he grabbed both my wrists in one of his hands putting them over my head, "Ana I said no." Another hard kiss pushed his tongue back inside my mouth and I forgot to try to touch him as we let our kisses deepened until I was moaning for more.
"Christian." My breathe was coming harder and all I could think of was the heat growing in me. I wanted him so much. "Christian." I repeated as I moaned.
"Patience baby, all good things come to those who wait." His hand tightened that was holding both of my wrists as he started kissing my neck again while his other hand started to explore me over my dress starting at my breasts. As his hand glided over my nipples I closed my eyes tight under the blindfold and pressed my legs together then I heard him whisper to me, "did I just make you wet?"
"Yes." I whispered to him feeling my cheeks burning red.
"Good but have to wait for later to do more, we are here."
"What?" Don't tease me, please touch me." I heard myself beg as I pressed my legs together tighter.
"So you don't want your surprise?"
"I do but I want you."
"What if I am part of the surprise?"
"Fine, show me."
"I plan to show you a great many things Ana all starting tonight."
I felt the car stop then Christian got out of the car and came over to my side. He still left me blindfolded as he helped me out. As we walked I felt a cool breeze brush over my shoulders and then he helped me step up. "Whoa." I said as I lurched forward. Wherever we were, it was moving.
His lips brushed over mine before he whispered, "Are you ready to see your surprise now?"
"Yes I am."
I closed my eyes in anticipation as I felt him start to untie my blindfold.